# Things stupid songs have taught you **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [December 11, 2014, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-stupid-songs-have-taught-you/706950 "2014-12-11T16:51:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2014, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-stupid-songs-have-taught-you/706950/81 "2014-12-12T19:31:19Z")
> [@Les\_Espaces\_Du\_Sommeil](#): > > _We built it_. Have you forgotten already? Where there’s a “we”, there’s a “them”. I’m one of the “them”. I don’t even know where the damn city is! ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2014, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-stupid-songs-have-taught-you/706950/82 "2014-12-12T19:33:33Z")
Well, I learned that “if you want to be happy for the rest of your life, make an ugly woman your wife” is NOT a sure fired path to lifetime happiness. Gawd I hope the bitch EX stalks me here on the Dope. ---
**Author:** ![Gedd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gedd/32/4938_2.png) [@Gedd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gedd)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2014, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-stupid-songs-have-taught-you/706950/83 "2014-12-12T19:33:52Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > I learned that her name is Rio, and she dances on the sand. Must . . . retain . . . self-control . . . ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2014, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-stupid-songs-have-taught-you/706950/84 "2014-12-12T19:45:36Z")
I learned that Paul Newman’s half Jewish, Goldie Hawn’s half too. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2014, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-stupid-songs-have-taught-you/706950/85 "2014-12-12T19:46:01Z")
That extending and retracting various body parts and shaking them (with whole body rotations) is “that what its all about”. All those years wasted on philosophy and religion and apparently its as simple as that, staring us in the face all those years. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2014, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-stupid-songs-have-taught-you/706950/86 "2014-12-12T19:49:58Z")
I know there’s some guy out there who claims to be my “Boogie Man” and that I turn him on. I dread the day I actually meet him. ---
**Author:** ![swampspruce](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampspruce/32/261_2.png) [@swampspruce](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampspruce)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2014, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-stupid-songs-have-taught-you/706950/87 "2014-12-12T20:11:58Z")
> [@Gedd](#): > > Must . . . retain . . . self-control . . . > [@Leaffan](#): > > I learned that her name is Rio, and she dances on the sand. \Oh Rio,Rio Dance Across The Rio Grande! \ Sorry, it’s Friday and I’m a weak, weak man. ---
**Author:** ![Amateur\_Barbarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/59ef9b/32.png) [@Amateur\_Barbarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amateur_Barbarian)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2014, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-stupid-songs-have-taught-you/706950/88 "2014-12-12T20:16:52Z")
> [@swampspruce](#): > > I’ve learned that if I have to drive around with a car full of girls, that [Fred](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u1cjaheraq8) can stay the fuck home… So what was he doing in the back of your pink Cadillac? ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba9def/32.png) [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2014, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-stupid-songs-have-taught-you/706950/89 "2014-12-12T20:26:53Z")
> [@Soylent\_Juicy](#): > > I learned that there’s no such place as South Detroit. Apparently if you go south in Detroit you end up in Windsor, ON. Gah! This is as bad as “Ich bin ein Berliner.” People think they are so damn clever, they caught a glaring geographical mistake in a wimpy Journey song. Oooh, aren’t they smart! The lyric is “ **s** outh Detroit”, not “ **S** outh Detroit”. You know - on the south side. There is a south side. There are houses there, where I am sure many people were born and raised. Look at a map, people! It’s not that uncommon a descriptor. There is a south Phoenix, but not a South Phoenix. If you want to argue no one born and raised in any geographical direction of Detroit ever refers to the quadrants of the city, I would concede the point. ---
**Author:** ![Kimballkid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b5a626/32.png) [@Kimballkid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimballkid)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2014, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-stupid-songs-have-taught-you/706950/90 "2014-12-12T20:29:10Z")
Apparently someone let the dogs out and we know not who. I also learned that we are loaded up and truckin’. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2014, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-stupid-songs-have-taught-you/706950/91 "2014-12-12T20:31:56Z")
I learned that heat is hot. And I learned that Timothy was quite tasty! ---
**Author:** ![BubbaDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bubbadog/32/333_2.png) [@BubbaDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BubbaDog)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2014, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-stupid-songs-have-taught-you/706950/92 "2014-12-12T20:34:55Z")
> [@Gedd](#): > > Must . . . retain . . . self-control . . . Hey, If the boys want to fight, you’d better let them. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2014, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-stupid-songs-have-taught-you/706950/93 "2014-12-12T20:45:11Z")
> [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](#): > > Gah! This is as bad as “Ich bin ein Berliner.” People think they are so damn clever, they caught a glaring geographical mistake in a wimpy Journey song. Oooh, aren’t they smart! > > The lyric is “ **s** outh Detroit”, not “ **S** outh Detroit”. You know - on the south side. There is a south side. There are houses there, where I am sure many people were born and raised. Look at a map, people! > > It’s not that uncommon a descriptor. There is a south Phoenix, but not a South Phoenix. If you want to argue no one born and raised in any geographical direction of Detroit ever refers to the quadrants of the city, I would concede the point. Indeed. In fact the south side of Chicago, is the baddest part of town. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2014, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-stupid-songs-have-taught-you/706950/94 "2014-12-12T20:48:36Z")
I learned that the fox says: “Joff-tchoff-tchoffo-tchoffo-tchoff!” ---
**Author:** ![Kimballkid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b5a626/32.png) [@Kimballkid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimballkid)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2014, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-stupid-songs-have-taught-you/706950/95 "2014-12-12T20:48:55Z")
I thought Chicago died one night. I remember hearing momma crying about it. ---
**Author:** ![Amateur\_Barbarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/59ef9b/32.png) [@Amateur\_Barbarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amateur_Barbarian)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2014, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-stupid-songs-have-taught-you/706950/96 "2014-12-12T20:53:15Z")
> [@BubbaDog](#): > > Hey, If the boys want to fight, you’d better let them. Nah, hang tough - the boys are backin’ down. Whoops, this isn’t the mondegreen thread, is it? ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2014, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-stupid-songs-have-taught-you/706950/97 "2014-12-12T20:54:50Z")
There is at least one werewolf residing in London, and he can be counted upon to maintain a perfect coiffure. Also, we know that he enjoys pina coladas, particularly at Trader Vic’s, but his preference for imbibing them while getting caught in the rain is still in question. ---
**Author:** ![tim-n-va](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tim-n-va/32/3001_2.png) [@tim-n-va](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tim-n-va)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2014, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-stupid-songs-have-taught-you/706950/98 "2014-12-12T20:55:54Z")
If a bluegrass song starts with “Two old friends shared a room in a home for the elderly”, someone’s not going to make it to the end of the song. ---
**Author:** ![lost4life](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c4cdca/32.png) [@lost4life](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lost4life)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2014, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-stupid-songs-have-taught-you/706950/99 "2014-12-12T20:56:21Z")
> [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](#): > > Gah! This is as bad as “Ich bin ein Berliner.” People think they are so damn clever, they caught a glaring geographical mistake in a wimpy Journey song. Oooh, aren’t they smart! > > The lyric is “ **s** outh Detroit”, not “ **S** outh Detroit”. You know - on the south side. There is a south side. There are houses there, where I am sure many people were born and raised. Look at a map, people! > > It’s not that uncommon a descriptor. There is a south Phoenix, but not a South Phoenix. If you want to argue no one born and raised in any geographical direction of Detroit ever refers to the quadrants of the city, I would concede the point. I’m not following. There is no south side. You can certainly move in a southernly direction, but there’s a river and another country south of downtown. So where is south Detroit? Here’s some interesting [information](http://www.vulture.com/2012/01/journey-dont-stop-believin-south-detroit.html). ---
**Author:** ![Soylent\_Juicy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@Soylent\_Juicy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Soylent_Juicy)\ **Post date:** [December 12, 2014, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-stupid-songs-have-taught-you/706950/100 "2014-12-12T20:58:50Z")
> [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](#): > > The lyric is “ **s** outh Detroit”, not “ **S** outh Detroit”. You know - on the south side. There is a south side. There are houses there, where I am sure many people were born and raised. Look at a map, people! [http://www.idolator.com/5078568/journey-confuses-two-million-more-people-about-detroits-geography](http://www.idolator.com/5078568/journey-confuses-two-million-more-people-about-detroits-geography) [http://archive.wzzm13.com/news/article/193931/82/Finally-the-South-Detroit-lyric-solved](http://archive.wzzm13.com/news/article/193931/82/Finally-the-South-Detroit-lyric-solved) At least “The Heart of Rock and Roll Is Still Beating” in _Detroit!_ [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-stupid-songs-have-taught-you/706950.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-stupid-songs-have-taught-you/706950.md?page=6)