# Things that infuriate you well beyond their actual importance **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 4, 2024, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-infuriate-you-well-beyond-their-actual-importance/1006712 "2024-09-04T02:18:38Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 34
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2024, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-infuriate-you-well-beyond-their-actual-importance/1006712/661 "2024-11-18T17:34:15Z")
Yeah, I’ve encountered it being recommended, completely earnestly, as a technique for managers to use to deliver harsh feedback. There is a superficially similar, but vastly better method that managers could use, which is more like: 1. We need to discuss [some problem with your performance], but you will have my full support in dealing with this. 2. (Discuss the problem in fair and objective terms. Describe why it is a genuine problem) 3. Describe the steps needed to turn the problem around. Provide tangible and useful support, monitoring and steering, to meet the expected standard. This is still one bad thing in between two good ones, but it’s not a shit sandwich of the type I described above, which is just ‘how do I dress up my criticism to make me look like I’m not the bad guy’ ---
**Author:** ![sb1953](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a87d85/32.png) [@sb1953](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sb1953)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2024, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-infuriate-you-well-beyond-their-actual-importance/1006712/662 "2024-11-18T18:02:13Z")
RE long YT video intros. I am convinced that there is a minimum -time threshold (\* mins or 12 mins???) they will say or do anything they can to keep you there for the whole enchilada once they get you to click! ---
**Author:** ![Saint\_Cad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/saint_cad/32/18907_2.png) [@Saint\_Cad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Saint_Cad)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2024, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-infuriate-you-well-beyond-their-actual-importance/1006712/663 "2024-11-18T18:09:05Z")
Interestingly, I was observed by my district on the day I was teaching how the bell curve is misused by HR in evaluations. One of the points made was the bell curve presumes a few outstanding employees and a few horrible employees. Sure enough the district gave me my “3 glows & 3 grows”. Made a great followup with my students as I pointed out that according to the district, **every** lesson has a few great parts, a few horrible parts and the rest is average. ---
**Author:** ![Ulfreida](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ulfreida/32/8014_2.png) [@Ulfreida](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ulfreida)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2024, 7:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-infuriate-you-well-beyond-their-actual-importance/1006712/664 "2024-11-18T19:17:12Z")
> [@ThelmaLou](#): > > YES! I get ~~disproportionately~~ _appropriately_ annoyed when I encounter people who **just don’t want to think!** And there’s a lot of it going around. 😠 Question: when people appear to not want to think, how much of this is due to 1. stupidity (far more common than smart people think it is) or 2. being afraid of the answer? ---
**Author:** ![carrps](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carrps/32/2957_2.png) [@carrps](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carrps)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2024, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-infuriate-you-well-beyond-their-actual-importance/1006712/665 "2024-11-18T20:08:19Z")
> [@enipla](#): > > I don’t mind wedge salad. It is at least honest about needing to be cut. I don’t mind wedge salads either. Because the lettuce isn’t cut (except for the two main ones) until the eater cuts it, it’s usually fresher and crisper than when you get an already “bite sized” lettuce salad that’s sat for hours and oxidized/wilted. I also hate lazy salad makers who don’t make the pieces bite sized. If not, you still need to either cut them with a knife and fork anyway or get salad dressing slapped across your cheeks. > [@slumtrimpet](#): > > The Caesar Salad ended up being two wedges of iceberg lettuce with a light sprinkle of Parmesan cheese. No bacon, no dressing, no croutons. Where do you get bacon on a Casear salad??? ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2024, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-infuriate-you-well-beyond-their-actual-importance/1006712/666 "2024-11-18T21:29:00Z")
> [@Cheesesteak](#): > > Wow, talk about a thing that infuriates me beyond its actual importance. My God, man, this is just asking for a trip to the ER to get stitched up. > > It’s like those people who cut bagels holding it in their hand while they slice downward with the knife. Or the ones poking a big knife at an avocado pit while holding it in their hand. > > Keep your hand out of the path of the knife, please. Yep. I read some time ago that the single most common cause of serious injuries in restaurants was cutting bagels like that. That may be outdated, but I am sure it is still significant. > [@ThelmaLou](#): > > YES! I get ~~disproportionately~~ _appropriately_ annoyed when I encounter people who **just don’t want to think!** And there’s a lot of it going around. Yes, that one is appropriate. > [@Mangetout](#): > > Apropos of nothing, something that infuriates me nearly every time I encounter it: _The Shit Sandwich_ method of critique - this is where you have something you want to say that you know is not going to land well, so you bookend it with a pair of _nice_ things. This was pushed in the One Minute Manager, IIRC. But what’s better- just the bad thing? When I did it it was _"Bob, you are usually doing great on these reports._ \*Sadly, the last two reports have not measured up to your usual standard. \* _I know you can get back on track! is there anything you need from me to get this done?"_ > [@minor7flat5](#): > > Someone here said that they can safely skip to 1/3 into any video and get to the actual content they want. That is unfortunately true most of the time. Yep. What I hate is a talking head saying stuff that could be done in a paragraph or two. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2024, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-infuriate-you-well-beyond-their-actual-importance/1006712/667 "2024-11-18T21:54:34Z")
> [@DrDeth](#): > > This was pushed in the One Minute Manager, IIRC. But what’s better- just the bad thing? > > When I did it it was _"Bob, you are usually doing great on these reports._ > > \*Sadly, the last two reports have not measured up to your usual standard. \* > > _I know you can get back on track! is there anything you need from me to get this done?"_ I’d say that example is actually quite reasonable - because it’s not three separate things (where the middle one is a useless turd); it’s a conversation about a single topic where the whole thing is helpful and the bookends aren’t there merely to justify saying the bad thing. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2024, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-infuriate-you-well-beyond-their-actual-importance/1006712/668 "2024-11-18T21:57:47Z")
The reason people uselessly pad out YouTube videos to a length is in order to qualify for insertion of midroll ads - the minimum run time used to be 10 minutes, now it’s 8. I make long videos because they have a lot of stuff in them. I don’t like midrolls so I don’t use them. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2024, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-infuriate-you-well-beyond-their-actual-importance/1006712/669 "2024-11-18T21:58:41Z")
> [@Mangetout](#): > > I’d say that example is actually quite reasonable - because it’s not three separate things (where the middle one is a useless turd); it’s a conversation about a single topic where the whole thing is helpful and the bookends aren’t there merely to justify saying the bad thing. It worked for me. IMHO it is better than “Bob, these two reports are substandard. You need to do better”. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2024, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-infuriate-you-well-beyond-their-actual-importance/1006712/670 "2024-11-18T22:00:26Z")
I agree, but you are really describing a different kind of thing that I went on to describe: > [@Mangetout](#): > > There is a superficially similar, but vastly better method that managers could use, which is more like: > > 1. We need to discuss [some problem with your performance], but you will have my full support in dealing with this. > 2. (Discuss the problem in fair and objective terms. Describe why it is a genuine problem) > 3. Describe the steps needed to turn the problem around. Provide tangible and useful support, monitoring and steering, to meet the expected standard. > > This is still one bad thing in between two good ones, but it’s not a shit sandwich of the type I described above, which is just ‘how do I dress up my criticism to make me look like I’m not the bad guy’ ---
**Author:** ![Snarky\_Kong](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a183cd/32.png) [@Snarky\_Kong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snarky_Kong)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2024, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-infuriate-you-well-beyond-their-actual-importance/1006712/671 "2024-11-19T03:56:08Z")
When people say cement when they mean concrete. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2024, 8:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-infuriate-you-well-beyond-their-actual-importance/1006712/672 "2024-11-19T08:40:34Z")
Me too. Not just anyone, but people who know the difference and still say cement instead of concrete. If don’t have a problem if they say ‘see-ment’ like a ‘see-ment pond’, that’s a legitimate usage. ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2024, 11:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-infuriate-you-well-beyond-their-actual-importance/1006712/673 "2024-11-19T11:37:26Z")
Hyphenated surnames. Pick one, dammit! ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2024, 1:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-infuriate-you-well-beyond-their-actual-importance/1006712/674 "2024-11-19T13:43:34Z")
> [@Snarky\_Kong](#): > > When people say cement when they mean concrete Heh, one of my nephews has a company that does concrete work (driveways, patios, etc). He explained about cement/concrete to me but I wasn’t really paying attention. ---
**Author:** ![TRC4941](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trc4941/32/6792_2.png) [@TRC4941](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TRC4941)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2024, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-infuriate-you-well-beyond-their-actual-importance/1006712/675 "2024-11-19T15:19:24Z")
> [@Snarky\_Kong](#): > > When people say cement when they mean concrete. When my grandson was 5 years old he corrected me on that! I had no idea. ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2024, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-infuriate-you-well-beyond-their-actual-importance/1006712/676 "2024-11-19T15:21:09Z")
I know the difference, but I’m sloppy about my usage. Sorry, @TriPolar . ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2024, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-infuriate-you-well-beyond-their-actual-importance/1006712/677 "2024-11-19T15:36:34Z")
It’s really a ‘me problem’. I understand what people mean. I think I was corrected on this once long ago and maybe like other things mentioned in this thread I’m projecting my own self criticism on others. ---
**Author:** ![Snarky\_Kong](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a183cd/32.png) [@Snarky\_Kong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snarky_Kong)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2024, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-infuriate-you-well-beyond-their-actual-importance/1006712/678 "2024-11-19T15:51:35Z")
I know what people mean too. The actual importance in day to day life is pretty small. I used to be a civil engineer, and the difference then was more important, but context told me what people meant. ---
**Author:** ![slumtrimpet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5e925/32.png) [@slumtrimpet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slumtrimpet)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2024, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-infuriate-you-well-beyond-their-actual-importance/1006712/679 "2024-11-19T17:05:42Z")
> [@carrps](#): > > Where do you get bacon on a Casear salad??? Okay. I don’t eat that many of them but I’m pretty sure I’ve had one or two that included bacon bits. It would have been a welcome addition to that particular “salad”. ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2024, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-infuriate-you-well-beyond-their-actual-importance/1006712/680 "2024-11-19T17:25:27Z")
Similar to the padded YouTube videos, how about online recipes? _“My family loooves these cinnamon rolls, I used to bake them for Christmas morning only but now hubby insists we have them at least once a month. Who doesn’t love a good cinnamon roll with a cup of hot java first thing in the morning? The scent brings the kids out of their rooms, even the dogs know when they’re in the oven!..”_ An on and on and on. I’ve learned to look for a “jump to recipe” button or do a CTRL-F and search for “ingredients”. mmm ETA: OK, I just did a quick random search for a recipe. This is how it begins: _The concept of meatloaf kind of makes me raise an eyebrow because, well, it’s a loaf of meat. But when it’s executed well it’s just so good. Meatloaf is so filling, so cozy, and so delicious that I look forward to eating the leftovers over the next few days (hello meatloaf sandwich, I’m looking at you). This Homemade Meatloaf recipe is the traditional meatloaf that we all know and love—tender, juicy, full of flavor, and with the perfectly tangy tomato glaze on top. It’s so perfect when paired with mashed potatoes and green beans. Like a plate of pure comfort!_ [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-infuriate-you-well-beyond-their-actual-importance/1006712.md?page=33) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-infuriate-you-well-beyond-their-actual-importance/1006712.md?page=35)