# Things that make me want to kick the TV **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [February 14, 2004, 2:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-me-want-to-kick-the-tv/229146 "2004-02-14T02:03:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Skytiger227](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/7feea3/32.png) [@Skytiger227](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skytiger227)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-me-want-to-kick-the-tv/229146/41 "2004-03-11T15:44:13Z")
> [@zztzed](#): > > Mr. Pibb is actually a Coke product. 😛 > > The Pepsi/iTunes commercial(s?) irritate me too, but mostly because of the girl’s accent and voice. She’s from staten island, like me… the accent cant be helped ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-me-want-to-kick-the-tv/229146/42 "2004-03-11T16:50:04Z")
I’m pretty sure that **tdn** is this “Bazz Aldrich” guy. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Shaggy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bbce88/32.png) [@Shaggy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shaggy)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-me-want-to-kick-the-tv/229146/43 "2004-03-11T17:24:28Z")
KFC’s **K** itchen **F** resh **C** hicken. Kitchen fresh? What was it before? Bathroom fresh? In the trunk of my car fresh? Anyone in West Michigan will probably agree on Marshal Redder Realistate. Get a new hair piece. ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-me-want-to-kick-the-tv/229146/44 "2004-03-11T17:27:56Z")
> [@Bruce\_Daddy](#): > > Mike Ditka’s Levitra ads. Indeed. If only because he says “stay in the game” about 80 times during the commercial. > [@](#): > > I was having trouble staying in the game. So I asked my doctor, “How can I stay in the game?” To help me stay in the game, he gave me a prescription to Levitra. So if you’re having trouble staying in the game, ask your doctor about staying in the game. Ask your doctor about Levitra. Of course I’m exagerating a bit here, but that’s how it sounds when you’ve heard it 1,000 times. ---
**Author:** ![Swampwolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8edcca/32.png) [@Swampwolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Swampwolf)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-me-want-to-kick-the-tv/229146/45 "2004-03-11T17:51:20Z")
There are two commercials which make me want not only to kick the tv, but to smash it into little pieces, gather it in a sack, tie a cinderblock to it, and dump it into the ocean: 1. Hardee’s…not the new 30-second commercials which could easily be boiled down to “Hardee’s. We don’t suck anymore,” but the breakfast commercial with a late-30’s guy trying to open a box of cereal. “There comes a time in every guy’s life when he’s out on his own…it can be tough” And … pow! Cereal all over the floor. “Without us, some guys would starve.” Well, Hardee’s, you’re not doing the human race any favours by keeping these nimrods alive. Shut down for breakfast, let those who can’t feed themselves without your grease-inna-bun starve, and reduce the surplus population 1. Diet Pepsi. A man sitting on the couch, eating popcorn and drinking Diet Pepsi…he hears a baby cry, turns his head slightly, says “I’ll be there in a minute!” It happens again. Then he gets his lazy, sports-watching ass off the couch, and goes into the other room _where his wife is giving birth._ That’s so fucking offensive, I don’t know where to begin! Guys, here’s a clue: If you’re the type of person to glue your eyes to baseball when your wife is birthing your child, you don’t deserve to have gotten laid, let alone married. 2. Without the third entry, the list wouldn’t be a real list. So I’m putting “3)” in here. But I’m not saying hello to anybody (especially anybody who is quoted in one of the SD books listing only two items…oh, sweet irony!). ---
**Author:** ![Carol\_the\_Impaler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Carol\_the\_Impaler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carol_the_Impaler)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-me-want-to-kick-the-tv/229146/46 "2004-03-11T18:31:32Z")
Clarinex is now suddenly pronounced clar-in-EX??? WTF? ---
**Author:** ![Tender\_Betty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c57346/32.png) [@Tender\_Betty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tender_Betty)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-me-want-to-kick-the-tv/229146/47 "2004-03-11T18:35:56Z")
personally, I’m sick to death of the Energizer commercial with the guys in the car and the driver is blabbing about dating a girl named Georgia. And now he won’t date girls named after states. Sick of IT! ---
**Author:** ![Algorithm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/algorithm/32/12204_2.png) [@Algorithm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Algorithm)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-me-want-to-kick-the-tv/229146/48 "2004-03-11T18:37:42Z")
> [@wireless](#): > > ARGH! I hate these. > Change-the-channel hate these. > > Guy one: Are you gellin’? > Guy two: Like Magellan. > Me: WTF? What does Magellan have to do with shoe inserts? > > OR > > G1: Are you gellin’? > G2: Like a fellon. > Me: [again]WTF??? Quit yellin’, we’re gellin’. Want some melon? ---
**Author:** ![widdershins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f0a364/32.png) [@widdershins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/widdershins)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-me-want-to-kick-the-tv/229146/49 "2004-03-11T21:55:40Z")
Those goddamn grinning idiots singing (lip-syncing) to that annoying fucking jingle for Goldfish crackers/cookies/cat food/whatever in the fuck they really are. And they can take those guitars shaped like the product and shove them them up their asses. But only after setting said instruments on fire. And - If those goofy twits keep sellin’ Shit in those ads rhyming words like gellin’ Then I’ll wind up a motherfuckin’ felon If I get violent on each offending melon And deliver beatins till they start smellin’ ‘Cause my anger ain’t quellin’ In fact, Mr. Madison Avenue, it’s swellin’\* On the bright side, apparently Pier One is replacing those annoying ads with Kirstie Alley rambling like a crackhead and frightening people. Hope it’s permanent. ---
**Author:** ![Tender\_Betty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c57346/32.png) [@Tender\_Betty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tender_Betty)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-me-want-to-kick-the-tv/229146/50 "2004-03-11T22:24:34Z")
Two words: Orbit Gum! ARRRRGGGHHH! ---
**Author:** ![mobo85](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@mobo85](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mobo85)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2004, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-me-want-to-kick-the-tv/229146/51 "2004-03-11T22:36:08Z")
> [@niblet\_head](#): > > Clarinex is now suddenly pronounced clar-in-EX??? WTF? Last time, I checked, it was always called clar-in-EX (like “Clara necks”). How did they used to pronounce it-clar-EE-nix? The current commercial that I’m not too fond of is one for an erectile dysfunction drug of some sort. To avoid listing the side effects, they don’t _say_ it’s an erectile dysfunction drug. So they do bad penis puns instead. There are two ads, one with a businessman making a deal with a Japanese company (“He will not budge. He is rock solid”), and another with a race car driver named Smilin’ Bob. > [@widdershins](#): > > On the bright side, apparently Pier One is replacing those annoying ads with Kirstie Alley rambling like a crackhead and frightening people. Hope it’s permanent. Would you prefer one of the _Queer Eye for the Straight Guy_ guys to her? 'Cause that’s who it is. ---
**Author:** ![Carol\_the\_Impaler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Carol\_the\_Impaler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carol_the_Impaler)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2004, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-me-want-to-kick-the-tv/229146/52 "2004-03-12T13:06:59Z")
[QUOTE=mobo85] Last time, I checked, it was always called clar-in-EX (like “Clara necks”). How did they used to pronounce it-clar-EE-nix? They didn’t. They used to say, like you said, “clara necks”, with the emphasis on “clara”. Now they emphasize it so it comes out clarin-EX. ---
**Author:** ![Spudo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bbce88/32.png) [@Spudo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spudo)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2004, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-me-want-to-kick-the-tv/229146/53 "2004-03-12T13:34:19Z")
Almost everything on it. I hate TV. ---
**Author:** ![anya\_marie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ebca7d/32.png) [@anya\_marie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anya_marie)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2004, 2:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-me-want-to-kick-the-tv/229146/54 "2004-03-12T14:00:46Z")
So last night I was watching Seinfeld and this commercial for OUST air sainitzer comes on, and the mother is bitching about her “tomboy daughter’s” clothes with their “gross smell”. Wouldn’t one suppose that this might signal that the clothes NEED TO BE WASHED! And that she is in fact a daft cow who sprays chemicals about in what I find a stupid manner?! ---
**Author:** ![Kiger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Kiger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kiger)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2004, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-me-want-to-kick-the-tv/229146/55 "2004-03-12T14:29:21Z")
The creepy woman who tells her Budweiser beer that she’s leaving it for MGD because it’s cold filtered. “Chaser” hangover pills with the one happy alchy and the one who forgot to take his pill. The Orick salesman who tells me that what women really want is a vacuum cleaner. ---
**Author:** ![LVgeogeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/b19c9b/32.png) [@LVgeogeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LVgeogeek)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2004, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-me-want-to-kick-the-tv/229146/56 "2004-03-12T18:32:57Z")
**Things that make me want to kick the TV are…** \*Reality shows (such as Big Brother, Survivor). \*The show _Street Smarts_ with the brain dead people that are asked the easiest questions in the world and still get it wrong. \*Those diet pill commercials (its not your fault your overweight… sure blame someone else, anyone but yourself) \*Prescripion drug commercials that don’t really tell you what the drug is for or the Rx commercial for heartbrun/allergies/whatever that may cause diarreah, upset stomach, kidney failure etc… (Ummm, Id rather have hearburn/allergies/whatever) where side effects are worse than the original problem. \*And those **stupid** _Truth_ and _The Anti Drug_ commercials. ---
**Author:** ![Silver\_Serpentine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3be4f8/32.png) [@Silver\_Serpentine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Serpentine)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2004, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-me-want-to-kick-the-tv/229146/57 "2004-03-12T20:19:27Z")
Has anyone else seen those commercials for the Pringles-shaped chocolate things? I’ve only seen the commercial twice, so I don’t remember the song that they remade, nor the name of these things (I think it starts with an “s”?). Anyway, the song they have playing is the most irritating thing I’ve ever heard. If I see it again soon, I’ll post as to what it is. ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [March 12, 2004, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-me-want-to-kick-the-tv/229146/58 "2004-03-12T22:11:11Z")
Two of them: 1 - The ending of the Glad trash bag commercial with Sugar Ray Leonard…that insipid little bitch and her _‘Dats what I’m talkin’ 'bout!!_ **GrrrrrrSmash!** 2 - (Radio ad, very regional to central Jersey) I don’t even know what car dealership the ad is for, but apparently it’s located in “E-Ton-Town”. Umm, no, shitdip, it’s located in Eatontown! It’s one fucking word, not three! You sound like Kodos saying “I am Clin-Ton” when you say it! And you say it that way roughly four times in the commercial. Didn’t anyone at the dealership happen to notice how fucking stupid this sounded before they aired it?? Ahhh…I feel better now. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spectre_of_pithecanthropus/32/12343_2.png) [@Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spectre_of_Pithecanthropus)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2004, 12:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-me-want-to-kick-the-tv/229146/59 "2004-03-13T00:03:45Z")
> [@](#): > > yeah… > > you can cool it, you can heat it, > 'cause baby I don’t need it. > Take your TV tube 'n eat it > And all those things on sports > and all those unconfirmed reports > I watch that rotten box until my head begin to hurt… —Frank Zappa, 1966. ---
**Author:** ![DarkPrince](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@DarkPrince](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DarkPrince)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2004, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-me-want-to-kick-the-tv/229146/60 "2004-03-13T00:15:42Z")
New radio one for me: The 7-11 Spicy Queso and Beef Go-Go Taquitos commercial. Hearing four people say “7-11 Spicy Queso and Beef Go-Go Taquitos!” slightly out of synch can cause spontaneous bouts of diarrhea. And no, it’s not a new word for cheese, it’s a new word fo stupid. Someone needs to pay for that one. The Miller beer ad is also pretty bad, just because I don’t think they actually read the script before deciding to use the ad. “We don’t have to tell YOU what good beer should taste like.” …two second pause… “It should taste rich, with a malty flavor, and strong taste.” Duh… The sound they always use for beer being poured in ads sounds really gross too. It reminds me of the noise when peeing into one of the broken urinals at school that hasn’t been flushed in ages and is filled with foamy, nasty piss. And **Shaggy** is so right about that Kitchen Fresh Chicken one. My friend and I end up yelling random obscenities at that smug bitch whenever we see it. “That’s what I said, it’s kitchen fresh chicken!” All the while acting like her husband is the dumbest thing to ever dumb its way out of the pit all dumbness was originally spawned in at the beginning of time. Hah, we’ll see who’s smug when we see her after twenty years of eating all that crap chicken as a big beanbag chair-esque blob who’s skin is oily enough to grease truck axles simply by rubbing her flabby, slab-like thighs on it. Mmm…needed to get that out of my system. /Goes skipping off humming. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-me-want-to-kick-the-tv/229146.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-me-want-to-kick-the-tv/229146.md?page=4)