# Things that make you immediately stop reading something

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-you-immediately-stop-reading-something/829270>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [February 10, 2019, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-you-immediately-stop-reading-something/829270 "2019-02-10T04:20:13Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 3

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**Author:** ![Ryan\_Liam](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ryan_liam/32/3965_2.png) [@Ryan\_Liam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ryan_Liam)\
**Post date:** [February 10, 2019, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-you-immediately-stop-reading-something/829270/41 "2019-02-10T23:13:02Z")

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‘People say’ Usually means what they think themselves.

‘I’m an ally’ Of whatever organisation or group.

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**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\
**Post date:** [February 10, 2019, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-you-immediately-stop-reading-something/829270/42 "2019-02-10T23:21:22Z")

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Oh, another one is, on other boards, when someone puts up a video as the full content of their post. Fuck that noise.

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**Author:** ![Ulf\_the\_Unwashed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Ulf\_the\_Unwashed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ulf_the_Unwashed)\
**Post date:** [February 11, 2019, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-you-immediately-stop-reading-something/829270/43 "2019-02-11T00:19:55Z")

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Oh, this is fun.

The one I immediately thought of (I reserve the right to post more if I think of them) was when someone wrote:

“I never take notes when I go to conferences and workshops. I just tweet out my thoughts and reactions.”

No, thanks. I stopped reading then and there.

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**Author:** ![Ulfreida](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ulfreida/32/8014_2.png) [@Ulfreida](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ulfreida)\
**Post date:** [February 11, 2019, 12:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-you-immediately-stop-reading-something/829270/44 "2019-02-11T00:34:13Z")

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I just experienced one in real life!

Orientate.

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**Author:** ![Asuka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dec6dc/32.png) [@Asuka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asuka)\
**Post date:** [February 11, 2019, 12:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-you-immediately-stop-reading-something/829270/45 "2019-02-11T00:46:47Z")

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Any “news” article where less than a paragraph in they start talking about “reactions from Twitter”. Unless it’s from a mainstream source or somebody actually important I think anyone’s Twitter opinion is worth less than the electricity generated to send it. Yes I really want to know what a man with ten followers and a single retweet thinks about President Trump on a frontpage article on CNN.

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**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\
**Post date:** [February 11, 2019, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-you-immediately-stop-reading-something/829270/46 "2019-02-11T01:00:35Z")

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> [@Ulfreida](#):
>
> Hey, you try writing headlines day in day out. Gotta get the damn paper out.

Hey, every now and then, you see a classic, _ **Tornado Rips Through Cemetery, Dozens Feared Dead** _

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**Author:** ![CelticKnot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/celticknot/32/3392_2.png) [@CelticKnot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CelticKnot)\
**Post date:** [February 11, 2019, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-you-immediately-stop-reading-something/829270/47 "2019-02-11T01:32:31Z")

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In fiction, overuse of unnecessary F-bombs. 4 times in the first two pages, and the events don’t justify the word, I’m done.

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**Author:** ![Periwinkle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Periwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Periwinkle)\
**Post date:** [February 11, 2019, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-you-immediately-stop-reading-something/829270/48 "2019-02-11T01:51:31Z")

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I don’t like it when writers drip disdain over the fat inhabitants of whatever town as a way to express contempt for the area. I guess it’s the “Walmart people” thing. So lazy. I lose respect and any interest in their “observations” when I see it.

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**Author:** ![road\_lobo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/d78d45/32.png) [@road\_lobo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/road_lobo)\
**Post date:** [February 11, 2019, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-you-immediately-stop-reading-something/829270/49 "2019-02-11T02:35:41Z")

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“iconic”

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**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\
**Post date:** [February 11, 2019, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-you-immediately-stop-reading-something/829270/50 "2019-02-11T02:51:26Z")

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“innovation”

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**Author:** ![Maserschmidt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/maserschmidt/32/18829_2.png) [@Maserschmidt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maserschmidt)\
**Post date:** [February 11, 2019, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-you-immediately-stop-reading-something/829270/51 "2019-02-11T02:55:55Z")

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“Research says…”

Sure, right, all that fucking means you googled something and found a bunch of articles that said whatever it is you wanted to say, and you didn’t want to bother investigating any actual facts or research. You fuckbucket.

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**Author:** ![Tatterdemalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/43a26b/32.png) [@Tatterdemalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tatterdemalion)\
**Post date:** [February 11, 2019, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-you-immediately-stop-reading-something/829270/52 "2019-02-11T03:06:45Z")

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> [@Ulfreida](#):
>
> I just experienced one in real life!
> 
> Orientate.

At work, anyone who uses architect as a verb.

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**Author:** ![Machinaforce](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/aeb1de/32.png) [@Machinaforce](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machinaforce)\
**Post date:** [February 11, 2019, 3:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-you-immediately-stop-reading-something/829270/53 "2019-02-11T03:32:43Z")

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> [@GreenWyvern](#):
>
> Any article about art or literature that uses the word “subvert”.

It seems like that’s pretty much EVERYTHING new, until you realize it’s anything but. Its like clickbait.  
For me it’s “groundbreaking” or “Change your life”.

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**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\
**Post date:** [February 11, 2019, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-you-immediately-stop-reading-something/829270/54 "2019-02-11T04:30:06Z")

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Well I’ve learned (the hard way) to immediately stop reading anything that has pop up banners informing me of hot grannies who want to fuck, NOW! No strings attached!.

Lies!! There are NO hot grannies, even hot grannies who would rather take it slow. 😠 You give the granny sex providers your credit card, and that hot granny changes before your very eyes into an explosive-looking headline saying “You knew Gary Coleman in the 80s as an African American actor. Well you will not believe what he is today!!”

Well let me fill you in on a little info: Gary Coleman isn’t there when you click. Its a cartoon Fat Albert going “Hey hey hey! Montenegro is an agressive nation that threatens global peace bitches!”

So just know, grannies dont want to fuck. Anyone, especially not you. And none of them are hot. Walk away when they pop up on your screen and try to lure you in with their siren song. And also know that Russia is a very misunderstood, persecuted superpower.

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**Author:** ![GreenWyvern](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/greenwyvern/32/2834_2.png) [@GreenWyvern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GreenWyvern)\
**Post date:** [February 11, 2019, 4:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-you-immediately-stop-reading-something/829270/55 "2019-02-11T04:32:37Z")

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> [@BrickBat](#):
>
> Really good reading so far…so many that I can identify with.
> 
> I groan and scoff when I see headlines with the same “newsspeak” lazy journalism cliches. Won’t read them online, or on paper, as they seem like the printed version of clickbait.
> 
> Some terms: highlighted ( underlined)
> 
> “Lawmaker blasts mayor’s decision…”
> 
> “Critics charge that new playground is pork barrel spending…”
> 
> “Public works project slated…”
> 
> “Commuter rail project chugs along…”

There’s a problem with this. In a big news organization, the people who write the headlines are usually different from the people who write the articles.

Editors and sub-editors write the headlines for articles submitted by journalists, so the quality of the headline and the quality of the article are unconnected.

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**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\
**Post date:** [February 11, 2019, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-you-immediately-stop-reading-something/829270/56 "2019-02-11T04:50:24Z")

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Anything that contains some cheap intentional-misspelling insult. Rethuglicans, Feminazis, Killary Clinton, Donald Drumpf (even if that was the name origin,) Herr Twitler, etc.

Also, conspiracy tinfoil key words like “Big Pharma”, etc.

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**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\
**Post date:** [February 11, 2019, 4:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-you-immediately-stop-reading-something/829270/57 "2019-02-11T04:56:35Z")

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_“See what these former hotties look like now!”_

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**Author:** ![BrickBat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac91a4/32.png) [@BrickBat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrickBat)\
**Post date:** [February 11, 2019, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-you-immediately-stop-reading-something/829270/58 "2019-02-11T05:09:51Z")

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> [@GreenWyvern](#):
>
> There’s a problem with this. In a big news organization, the people who write the headlines are usually different from the people who write the articles.
> 
> Editors and sub-editors write the headlines for articles submitted by journalists, so the quality of the headline and the quality of the article are unconnected.

Sounds a shame. Like the content of news is deliberately dumbed down.

I guess it’s that way on TV documentaries as well.

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**Author:** ![Asuka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dec6dc/32.png) [@Asuka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asuka)\
**Post date:** [February 11, 2019, 10:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-you-immediately-stop-reading-something/829270/59 "2019-02-11T10:05:22Z")

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> [@Velocity](#):
>
> Anything that contains some cheap intentional-misspelling insult. Rethuglicans, Feminazis, Killary Clinton, Donald Drumpf (even if that was the name origin,) Herr Twitler, etc.
> 
> Also, conspiracy tinfoil key words like “Big Pharma”, etc.

I’ve noticed this a ton lately. “Freeze Peach” is pretty common to mock people who support “Free Speech” and “Ray Cism” to mock people who see racism everywhere.

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**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\
**Post date:** [February 11, 2019, 10:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-make-you-immediately-stop-reading-something/829270/60 "2019-02-11T10:17:56Z")

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> [@BrickBat](#):
>
> Sounds a shame. Like the content of news is deliberately dumbed down.
> 
> I guess it’s that way on TV documentaries as well.

In print media, the final layout determines the exact character count available for a particular headline. Layout is done towards the end of the process of creating tomorrow’s newspaper, while writing the actual article is near the beginning.

In other words, the writer has no way of knowing what character count they’d need to hit, when writing a headline. Additionally, their work for tomorrow’s paper is done already … what, now they gotta come back and work a 2nd shift just to provide headlines?

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