# Things that only mobsters could get away with
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-only-mobsters-could-get-away-with/374245
**Category:** Cafe Society
**Created:** [September 26, 2006, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-only-mobsters-could-get-away-with/374245 "2006-09-26T18:55:20Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Jackknifed\_Juggernaut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackknifed_Juggernaut)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2006, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-only-mobsters-could-get-away-with/374245/1 "2006-09-26T18:55:20Z")
Since this is Cafe Society, I’m referring to mobsters on TV or in the movies.
My friend noticed that mobsters in _The Sopranos_ seem to use the word “sez” (says) alot. Example: “So I sez to her, come to the room with me. And then she sez to me, ‘you have to ask my pimp’. So I sez, ‘You a professional?’. And she sez…”
You get the picture. Nowhere else in society can someone else get away with that particular conjugation of “to say”.
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### Author:  [@E-Sabbath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-Sabbath)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2006, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-only-mobsters-could-get-away-with/374245/2 "2006-09-26T19:01:30Z")
So, I sez to Marge, I sez, “Dude must not be from around here.”
Regional coloquialism. The ‘sez’ - ‘sez’ is mostly hausenfrau gossipping, while the single ‘sez’ appears to be a more male trait. Over on the left coast, for a while, ‘go’ in place of ‘says’ was popular.
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### Author:  [@Jackknifed\_Juggernaut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackknifed_Juggernaut)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2006, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-only-mobsters-could-get-away-with/374245/3 "2006-09-26T19:05:47Z")
> [@E-Sabbath](#):
>
> So, I sez to Marge, I sez, “Dude must not be from around here.”
>
> Regional coloquialism. The ‘sez’ - ‘sez’ is mostly hausenfrau gossipping, while the single ‘sez’ appears to be a more male trait. Over on the left coast, for a while, ‘go’ in place of ‘says’ was popular.
I’ve spent most of my life in northern New Jersey, very close to the setting of The Sopranos. Nobody uses “sez” like that. At least not currently. We do, however, use “go”.
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### Author:  [@Nonsuch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nonsuch)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2006, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-only-mobsters-could-get-away-with/374245/4 "2006-09-26T19:09:18Z")
Seems kind of a strange thread title given the subject matter …
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### Author:  [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2006, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-only-mobsters-could-get-away-with/374245/5 "2006-09-26T19:16:21Z")
Although I’ve considered enlisting the aid of the Mafia to stop my daughter from using “-and I’m like; and she’s like…” for “say.”
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### Author:  [@Jackknifed\_Juggernaut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackknifed_Juggernaut)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2006, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-only-mobsters-could-get-away-with/374245/6 "2006-09-26T19:19:05Z")
> [@Nonsuch](#):
>
> Seems kind of a strange thread title given the subject matter …
Yes. I didn’t mean to dwell on the whole “sez” thing. It’s just one example. I intended for this thread to be about anything that mobsters can get away with, that others in society can’t.
Other examples are smoking big, smelly cigars any place and any time, calling any woman “sweetheart”, and going into a watch store and walking (not running) out with a brand new watch without paying.
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### Author:  [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2006, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-only-mobsters-could-get-away-with/374245/7 "2006-09-26T19:41:14Z")
> [@Jackknifed Juggernaut](#):
>
> Yes. I didn’t mean to dwell on the whole “sez” thing. It’s just one example. I intended for this thread to be about anything that mobsters can get away with, that others in society can’t.
>
> Other examples are smoking big, smelly cigars any place and any time, calling any woman “sweetheart”, and going into a watch store and walking (not running) out with a brand new watch without paying.
I can do any of those things if I bring my shotgun with me, provided I regularly stroke, the barrel, call it “Shirley,” and stage-whisper, “Now, Shirley, you let me do the talking this time. I’m tired of cleaning up after you when you lose your temper.”
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### Author:  [@E-Sabbath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-Sabbath)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2006, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-only-mobsters-could-get-away-with/374245/8 "2006-09-26T19:45:29Z")
I hear ‘sez’ up in Queens, mostly, honestly.
… I dunno, man. I’ve got a problem with mob shows, cause it’s totally different from the connected people that I’ve run into and away from, over time.
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### Author:  [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2006, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-only-mobsters-could-get-away-with/374245/9 "2006-09-26T20:00:10Z")
> [@Slithy Tove](#):
>
> Although I’ve considered enlisting the aid of the Mafia to stop my daughter from using “-and I’m like; and she’s like…” for “say.”
Don’t say “like”, say, “it appears to be like unto”.
🙂
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### Author:  [@D\_Odds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/D_Odds)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2006, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-only-mobsters-could-get-away-with/374245/10 "2006-09-26T20:12:29Z")
> [@E-Sabbath](#):
>
> I hear ‘sez’ up in Queens, mostly, honestly.
>
> … I dunno, man. I’ve got a problem with mob shows, cause it’s totally different from the connected people that I’ve run into and away from, over time.
I’m about 5-7 minutes outside of Howard Beach (Queens), generally considered a mobster-infested neighborhood. Now, I don’t know if some of the people I’ve run into are connected or not, but I have met many of the stereotypes one sees on the TV shows (and this includes before The Sopranos, so it isn’t just people trying to imitate the show). I’m also pretty sure I’ve run into a number of Russian mobsters - they (IMHO) stick out more than the Mediterranean variety (if indeed they were mobsters - I neglected to ask them). Lastly would be the Jewish mobsters (not including Russian and other ex-Soviet ones) - I may have met a few of these, but that would be a pure guess.
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### Author:  [@pizzabrat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pizzabrat)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2006, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-only-mobsters-could-get-away-with/374245/11 "2006-09-26T20:15:09Z")
> [@Jackknifed Juggernaut](#):
>
> My friend noticed that mobsters in _The Sopranos_ seem to use the word “sez” (says) alot. Example: “So I sez to her, come to the room with me. And then she sez to me, ‘you have to ask my pimp’. So I sez, ‘You a professional?’. And she sez…”
“Sez”, huh? How funny - and what an amazing coincidence. I literally just got finished reading this Wikipedia article on [Eye dialect](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eye_dialect), in which they note criticism towards its misuse (usually when authors are especially eager indicate certain groups). Check out the first example they use in the paragraph about this criticism. And pray tell how do you pronounce “says” if not “sez”?
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### Author:  [@Jackknifed\_Juggernaut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackknifed_Juggernaut)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2006, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-only-mobsters-could-get-away-with/374245/12 "2006-09-26T20:30:45Z")
> [@pizzabrat](#):
>
> “Sez”, huh? How funny - and what an amazing coincidence. I literally just got finished reading this Wikipedia article on [Eye dialect](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eye_dialect), in which they note criticism towards its misuse (usually when authors are especially eager indicate certain groups). Check out the first example they use in the paragraph about this criticism. And pray tell how do you pronounce “says” if not “sez”?
I’m not talking about the pronunciation. It shouldn’t follow “I” or “they”, unless you’re a mobster. And it shouldn’t be used for the past tense as a replacement for “said”.
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### Author:  [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2006, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-only-mobsters-could-get-away-with/374245/13 "2006-09-26T22:24:49Z")
Only a mobster can wear a plaid suit and spats.
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### Author:  [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2006, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-only-mobsters-could-get-away-with/374245/14 "2006-09-26T22:30:49Z")
> [@E-Sabbath](#):
>
> … I dunno, man. I’ve got a problem with mob shows, cause it’s totally different from the connected people that I’ve run into and away from, over time.
I know wutcha mean…I never watch mob shows at all, cuz it’s too much like muh real life.
(hitches up his pleated plaid trousers to better display his spats and two-tone brogans, and leans back in his chair)
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### Author:  [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)
#### Post date: [September 26, 2006, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-only-mobsters-could-get-away-with/374245/15 "2006-09-26T22:56:16Z")
Only Hollywood mobsters could get away with using sixty-years out of date slang.
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### Author:  [@E-Sabbath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-Sabbath)
#### Post date: [September 27, 2006, 1:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-only-mobsters-could-get-away-with/374245/16 "2006-09-27T01:40:06Z")
Ike, I worked for a highway construction company for a few years. And a furniture rental place. I’m not saying I ever met a Gotti, I’m just saying that there were some interesting people at both of those locations.
Here’s something. Mobsters are the only people who can get away with building huge projects that lose money without having to worry about upset investors at all.
Like, say, the golden age comic book companies…
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### Author:  [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)
#### Post date: [September 27, 2006, 2:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-only-mobsters-could-get-away-with/374245/17 "2006-09-27T02:13:35Z")
Only mobsters can wear chalk-striped (as opposed to pin-striped) suits. With a flower in the lapel.
Only mobsters can walk the streets carrying violin cases.
Only mobsters can live in a tenement neighborhood and drive a big black Lincoln or Cadillac.
Only mobsters can loom over a baby carriage, pinch the baby’s cheek and say “Nice kid you got dere.”
Only mobsters have a brother who’s a cop, or a priest.
While both mobsters and millionaire bosses prefer big, fat cigars, only mobsters leave the cigar in their mouths when they talk.
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### Author:  [@Dr.Rieux](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Rieux)
#### Post date: [September 27, 2006, 2:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-only-mobsters-could-get-away-with/374245/18 "2006-09-27T02:45:34Z")
> [@E-Sabbath](#):
>
> Mobsters are the only people who can get away with building huge projects that lose money without having to worry about upset investors at all.
Two words for you: Bugsy Siegel
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### Author:  [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)
#### Post date: [September 27, 2006, 3:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-only-mobsters-could-get-away-with/374245/19 "2006-09-27T03:38:26Z")
> [@kunilou](#):
>
> Only mobsters can walk the streets carrying violin cases.
And, you know, violinists. Though I think you’re thinking of cello cases, violin cases being a mite small for weapony.
In which case I have to say, “And, you know, cellists.”
> [@](#):
>
> Only mobsters can wear chalk-striped (as opposed to pin-striped) suits. With a flower in the lapel.
Excuse me? What about the Joker?
> [@](#):
>
> Only mobsters can loom over a baby carriage, pinch the baby’s cheek and say “Nice kid you got dere.”
Did you just call my aunt georgia a mobster? Why I killed a man…damn, I already used that joke tonight.
> [@](#):
>
> Only mobsters have a brother who’s a cop, or a priest.
Yes, otherwise cops & priests are all only children. :rolleyes:
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### Author:  [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)
#### Post date: [September 27, 2006, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-that-only-mobsters-could-get-away-with/374245/20 "2006-09-27T04:14:05Z")
> [@Bippy the Beardless](#):
>
> Only a mobster can wear a plaid suit and spats.
Only the succesful mobsters, though. Everyone knows that dead men don’t wear plaid.
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