# Things they don't tell you about getting old:

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-they-dont-tell-you-about-getting-old/698189>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [September 11, 2014, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-they-dont-tell-you-about-getting-old/698189 "2014-09-11T15:46:39Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 7

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**Author:** ![Cold\_Dish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ce7236/32.png) [@Cold\_Dish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cold_Dish)\
**Post date:** [September 24, 2014, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-they-dont-tell-you-about-getting-old/698189/121 "2014-09-24T14:09:24Z")

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It takes twice as long to look half as good…

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**Author:** ![Grrlbrarian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrlbrarian/32/4048_2.png) [@Grrlbrarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrlbrarian)\
**Post date:** [September 24, 2014, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-they-dont-tell-you-about-getting-old/698189/122 "2014-09-24T15:07:31Z")

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> [@overlyverbose](#):
>
> It’s a hell of a lot harder to lose weight than it used to be, even when I do everything “right.” Or maybe my everything right has changed?
> 
> Speaking of, I can’t eat unhealthy foods without consequences anymore. Headaches, stomach aches, bloating and nausea - I feel disgusting and sluggish after junk food, and I never used to when I was in my 20s. So I find myself eating healthy not always to lose weight, but because the consequences are far more uncomfortable than they used to be.
> 
> Also, all the fat in my body seems to be migrating into my ass, probably as a result of childbirth.
> 
> Inside I still feel the same as I did in my 20s, so I’m trying not to let on to my body that I’m almost 40.

+1 except that I’m turning 43 next week. Especially on the losing weight part. If I’d practiced half these healthy habits in my early twenties pre-childbirth, I would have had an EVERYTHING that was toned and great-looking. Now my metabolism has no forgiveness, exercise causes pain (though I still do 5x per week), and that last 10 pounds or so isn’t going anywhere. Really not looking forward to menopause either, especially if it makes all this crap even worse. ☹

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**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\
**Post date:** [September 24, 2014, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-they-dont-tell-you-about-getting-old/698189/123 "2014-09-24T15:47:35Z")

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Rule #1 of growing old: Almost everything hurts, and what doesn’t hurt, doesn’t work correctly any more. ☹

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**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2014, 2:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-they-dont-tell-you-about-getting-old/698189/124 "2014-09-25T02:39:10Z")

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Just a few hours ago, I was making out a shopping list, and couldn’t remember how to spell “soup.” None of the possibilities looked right for about 5 minutes, until I finally realized it was “soup.” This has been happening a lot lately, and I used to be a damn good speller. Same thing with math.

And lately, I’ve been turning off CNN and listening to music, rather than the news. I’m at the point where I say “It’s not my problem” more than ever. The endless barrage of Middle-Eastern events, the latest disease from Africa, the paralysis in Washington . . . Why do I have to be concerned with it unless it spreads in my direction? I have my own problems.

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**Author:** ![jabiru](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/bbce88/32.png) [@jabiru](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jabiru)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2014, 8:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-they-dont-tell-you-about-getting-old/698189/125 "2014-09-25T08:42:02Z")

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No one told me how easily I’d bruise nor how long it takes scratches etc to heal. I got a scratch on my arm last week from hitting it against the latch of the door at work. In times of yore, they probably wouldn’t have been an injury at all but I do this particular injury all the time now and I bleed like a stuck pig for half an hour or more and the scratch doesn’t heal for weeks.

I’m sure some of my colleagues think I’m self- harming.

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**Author:** ![iljitsch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/77aa72/32.png) [@iljitsch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iljitsch)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2014, 11:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-they-dont-tell-you-about-getting-old/698189/126 "2014-09-25T11:41:31Z")

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You may want to talk to your doctor about this. Trust me, you don’t want to let blood clotting problems slide.

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**Author:** ![jabiru](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/bbce88/32.png) [@jabiru](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jabiru)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2014, 12:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-they-dont-tell-you-about-getting-old/698189/127 "2014-09-25T12:00:44Z")

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I’ve been to a haematologist. All sorts of tests were run with no abnormal results detected. Just have to stay away from aspirin but I still bruise/bleed easily.

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**Author:** ![Soylent\_Juicy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@Soylent\_Juicy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Soylent_Juicy)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2014, 1:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-they-dont-tell-you-about-getting-old/698189/128 "2014-09-25T13:50:56Z")

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I can’t handle loud music anymore. It literally hurts my ears. Good thing I’ve seen all my favourite bands live because I have no desire to ever go to another concert.

Same with movies. It’s too loud in the theatre. I prefer to watch them at home on our big TV.

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**Author:** ![Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spectre_of_pithecanthropus/32/12343_2.png) [@Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spectre_of_Pithecanthropus)\
**Post date:** [September 27, 2014, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-they-dont-tell-you-about-getting-old/698189/129 "2014-09-27T21:55:20Z")

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I went bald in my 20s, which was kind of good in a way, because when it happens at that age you’re still young in every other way, and going bald becomes just a thing that happens.

Dancing. For the middle aged and older guys out there, does anyone’s SO still pressure you to dance? Even at home I feel like an idiot.

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**Author:** ![Becky2844](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@Becky2844](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Becky2844)\
**Post date:** [September 27, 2014, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-they-dont-tell-you-about-getting-old/698189/130 "2014-09-27T23:57:35Z")

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Everything that used to be wet is now dry. Everything that used to be dry is now wet.

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**Author:** ![GusNSpot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gusnspot/32/436_2.png) [@GusNSpot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GusNSpot)\
**Post date:** [September 28, 2014, 5:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-they-dont-tell-you-about-getting-old/698189/131 "2014-09-28T05:37:12Z")

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> [@Lanzy](#):
>
> I am 62, the only thing I have noticed is I have to wear reading glasses. When does all this other shit start?

Tomorrow… 😃

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**Author:** ![GusNSpot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gusnspot/32/436_2.png) [@GusNSpot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GusNSpot)\
**Post date:** [September 28, 2014, 6:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-they-dont-tell-you-about-getting-old/698189/132 "2014-09-28T06:11:40Z")

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I am amused by the young set.  
I am glad they enjoy it but no way no how and I going to get all fixed up to go jump around on a crowed floor doing calisthenics getting all sweaty and tired.

I was sent to ballroom dancing school between the 8th & 9th grade. We also learned the basics of ‘Swing Dancing’ which had just hit town.

I am actually pretty good ballroom dancer.  
I was taught by a woman.  
The last thing she told all of us, boys & girls was:

Dancing is a socially acceptable way of getting your hands on other guys / girls women / men." 😃

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**Author:** ![Mijin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mijin/32/9369_2.png) [@Mijin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mijin)\
**Post date:** [September 28, 2014, 6:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-they-dont-tell-you-about-getting-old/698189/133 "2014-09-28T06:16:46Z")

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Is this one just me:  
All my joints make popping and clicking sounds now. Is this one just me? It’s not uncomfortable, but can be embarrassing.  
e.g. tried a pilates class, there was an exercise where you had to reach up repeatedly. Every rep the silence was punctuated (only) by the click of my shoulders.

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**Author:** ![enipla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/54ee81/32.png) [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)\
**Post date:** [September 28, 2014, 1:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-they-dont-tell-you-about-getting-old/698189/134 "2014-09-28T13:41:14Z")

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> [@Kansas\_Beekeeper](#):
>
> I’m slowly recovering from plantar fasciitis. At it’s worst, it was surprisingly painful. I mean the kind of pain where going from the parking lot at work (a block and a half) to my desk was almost more than I could do. It pretty much ruined my vacation this year.

Oh man. When my wife and I visited the Smithsonian about 6(?) years ago, I developed PF. I had no the idea what the fuck it was. Luckily after about 2 hours of walking, the tendon re-tears itself, and it doesn’t hurt quite as much.

But the Smithsonian, and the Mall? That was one hell of a lot of painful walking.

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**Author:** ![race\_to\_the\_bottom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c4cdca/32.png) [@race\_to\_the\_bottom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/race_to_the_bottom)\
**Post date:** [September 29, 2014, 1:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-they-dont-tell-you-about-getting-old/698189/135 "2014-09-29T01:46:51Z")

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Ok, it sucks to get old (66), but there are things you can do.  
Don’t worry about ear hair. Just cut it off and nobody will be the wiser.  
If you have any extra fat, get rid of it. Your entire body, expecially your back, knees, and hips will thank you. Join a gym.  
Walk. My doctor says the difference between those who age gracefully and those who keel over are that the former WALK. Hike in the mountains if you can.  
Never skip a shower. If necessary, do it twice a day. Make sure your oral health is ok. Floss every day.

Don’t let yourself think like an “old person”. Think young. Spend time around young people. Learn from them. Relate to them as fellow adults and as someone with useful experience to impart.Remember how it was when you were young and older people were always dumping on the youth for their different ideas.

Having said all that, what you learn when you get older is that time accelerates, as others have noted. You calculate how much useful, healthy time you most likely have, and it is just a small percentage of your total experience. For example, you are 65 and 50 seems like yesterday, but in 15 years, you will be 80, and it will be here MUCH faster than the last 15, and THAT really sucks.

It is this knowledge that you can look into the distance and see a hooded black-clad figure carrying a scythe waiting down the road, a road which becomes shorter with each passing year which is really distressing. When you are young, you have endless summers ahead of you. When you get older, you can count them on your fingers …and your toes, if you are lucky. 🙂

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**Author:** ![pullin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c57346/32.png) [@pullin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pullin)\
**Post date:** [September 29, 2014, 10:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-they-dont-tell-you-about-getting-old/698189/136 "2014-09-29T10:16:37Z")

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Maybe it’s just my perception, but there seem to be fewer places for me to “be”. I really don’t want this to sound like a complaint, just an observation. It seems the vast majority of entertainment venues are geared toward the young. Clubs, restaurants and movies aren’t aiming for my demographic (58), but for the ones a few decades my junior. It’s a Friday night, the Missus is visiting relatives, I’ve got a full wallet, a full tank, and time on my hands. Let’s see… solo in a popular restaurant seems uncomfortable… all the local bars are loud, dance and/or singles scene places… maybe I’ll go to a movie and see: Ninja Turtles? Dolphin Tale 2? Guardians of the Galaxy?

The wife and I find ourselves in a sort of “retreat” from most of the pastimes of the past. We either aren’t welcome, or have grown beyond them and have no interest. I think it’s a natural part of aging to desire some calm, peace, and quiet to reflect and enjoy. The music is too loud in restaurants, the sound is too harsh and loud in movies (and we’re tired of seeing things explode). And the crowds at most outdoor public gatherings seem incapable of spending any time without making sure everyone is subjected to their annoying and amplified music.

Again, sorry if this sounds like a whine as I don’t mean it to be. It’s just that we’re both surprised at how many places we don’t want to go anymore.

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**Author:** ![aruvqan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aruvqan/32/2891_2.png) [@aruvqan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aruvqan)\
**Post date:** [September 29, 2014, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-they-dont-tell-you-about-getting-old/698189/137 "2014-09-29T16:13:09Z")

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> [@pullin](#):
>
> Maybe it’s just my perception, but there seem to be fewer places for me to “be”. \<snip\>
> 
> The wife and I find ourselves in a sort of “retreat” from most of the pastimes of the past. We either aren’t welcome, or have grown beyond them and have no interest. I think it’s a natural part of aging to desire some calm, peace, and quiet to reflect and enjoy. The music is too loud in restaurants, the sound is too harsh and loud in movies (and we’re tired of seeing things explode). And the crowds at most outdoor public gatherings seem incapable of spending any time without making sure everyone is subjected to their annoying and amplified music.
> 
> Again, sorry if this sounds like a whine as I don’t mean it to be. It’s just that we’re both surprised at how many places we don’t want to go anymore.

I agree that there is not much around for those of a certain age - unless you live in a seriously major city like LA, NY, Boston … where a niche entertainment venue can have enough population to support it.

What is really missing are entertainment venues of moderation - the old school coffee house with quiet music, good ‘non-foofy Star$$ coffee milkshakes’ coffees [there are hundreds of types of beans out there, with a huge variety of taste profiles. Have a tasting flight of coffee …] and a good selection of pastries both sweet and savory. A non flash smoking venue - no loud music, the ability to smoke with a decent selection of alcoholic and nonalcoholic beverages - think movie image of an English Gentlemans club, sitting around quietly chatting, enjoying a fire and a drink and smoke with other quiet people. A no shit bar - no loud music, perhaps a couple pool tables and dart boards and a dance floor where they don’t try to play the music at 150 db. One of my favorite memories of living in Virginia Beach off Witchduck was the third run movie theater that served food and drinks - it wasn’t the big flash movie, but older ones.

At this point in time, I have really great memories of my Grandparents summer house in Western NY - a classic 1920s Craftsman 3 season ‘cottage’ on 9 acres with 60 feet lakefront. If I had a serious amount of money, I would try to buy it back, winterize it and we could retire there and enjoy quiet life. We are as you are long past the desire for flashy loud places crammed with rude people out on the make.  
[URL=“[http://www.pinterest.com/pin/create/extension/](http://www.pinterest.com/pin/create/extension/)”]

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**Author:** ![scootergirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e99b99/32.png) [@scootergirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scootergirl)\
**Post date:** [September 29, 2014, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-they-dont-tell-you-about-getting-old/698189/138 "2014-09-29T16:37:45Z")

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There are so many responses about ear hair that it’s making me want to go check. OK, I checked. No ear hair for me, yet. I’ll turn 51 soon.

For me it’s muscle recuperation time.

There may have already been a thread about the flip side of this subject, but if not, we should have one. There are some things that are better at 50 than at 20 years old. 😃

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**Author:** ![Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spectre_of_pithecanthropus/32/12343_2.png) [@Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spectre_of_Pithecanthropus)\
**Post date:** [October 3, 2014, 4:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-they-dont-tell-you-about-getting-old/698189/139 "2014-10-03T04:04:10Z")

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> [@pullin](#):
>
> Maybe it’s just my perception, but there seem to be fewer places for me to “be”. I really don’t want this to sound like a complaint, just an observation. It seems the vast majority of entertainment venues are geared toward the young. Clubs, restaurants and movies aren’t aiming for my demographic (58), but for the ones a few decades my junior. It’s a Friday night, the Missus is visiting relatives, I’ve got a full wallet, a full tank, and time on my hands. Let’s see… solo in a popular restaurant seems uncomfortable… all the local bars are loud, dance and/or singles scene places… maybe I’ll go to a movie and see: Ninja Turtles? Dolphin Tale 2? Guardians of the Galaxy?
> 
> The wife and I find ourselves in a sort of “retreat” from most of the pastimes of the past. We either aren’t welcome, or have grown beyond them and have no interest. I think it’s a natural part of aging to desire some calm, peace, and quiet to reflect and enjoy. The music is too loud in restaurants, the sound is too harsh and loud in movies (and we’re tired of seeing things explode). And the crowds at most outdoor public gatherings seem incapable of spending any time without making sure everyone is subjected to their annoying and amplified music.

I think every generation goes through this; it’s just taken a lot longer for us because we’ve been able to appreciate the music of younger generations. With certain movies loud audio doesn’t particularly bother me, but then I’m not likely to go to any that would have a lot of explosions or similar jarring noises; in the movies I go to the loud volume simply makes it a more immersive experience.

I won’t go to any event or establishment that features a DJ and dance floor; they’re not going to play any music that I particularly care for, and as I mentioned upthread, since reaching my upper forties I’ve just felt dancing makes me look like an idiot. It reminds me of all those 1960s movies with overdressed older people doing the Twist or Watusi; I don’t overdress but the principle’s the same.

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**Author:** ![Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spectre_of_pithecanthropus/32/12343_2.png) [@Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spectre_of_Pithecanthropus)\
**Post date:** [October 3, 2014, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-they-dont-tell-you-about-getting-old/698189/140 "2014-10-03T04:14:05Z")

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> [@Dale\_Sams](#):
>
> Losing the ability to whistle? At least proficiently

I never knew about this one, but it does seem to be a thing. I could never whistle well, and now I can’t do it at all.

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