# Things to drive your cat crazy **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 5, 2003, 10:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-to-drive-your-cat-crazy/217130 "2003-12-05T10:53:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![AtomicDog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ac91a4/32.png) [@AtomicDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AtomicDog)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2003, 10:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-to-drive-your-cat-crazy/217130/1 "2003-12-05T10:53:32Z")
Rubbing her fur in dry weather, then zapping her ears. ---
**Author:** ![Master\_Wang-Ka](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/master_wang-ka/32/3325_2.png) [@Master\_Wang-Ka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Master_Wang-Ka)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2003, 12:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-to-drive-your-cat-crazy/217130/2 "2003-12-05T12:23:07Z")
Tie a tube sock loosely around her middle, just forward of her back legs. ---
**Author:** ![Eats\_Crayons](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/278dde/32.png) [@Eats\_Crayons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eats_Crayons)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2003, 12:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-to-drive-your-cat-crazy/217130/3 "2003-12-05T12:52:02Z")
Santa Hats for pets. ---
**Author:** ![HDS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/bb73d2/32.png) [@HDS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HDS)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2003, 1:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-to-drive-your-cat-crazy/217130/4 "2003-12-05T13:04:48Z")
Dip a back paw in water. _walk_ _shakeshakeshake_ _walk_ _shakeshakeshake_ _evil look_ ---
**Author:** ![Jamlad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b77776/32.png) [@Jamlad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jamlad)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2003, 1:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-to-drive-your-cat-crazy/217130/5 "2003-12-05T13:05:24Z")
My cats do not approve of poor behavior on my part. ---
**Author:** ![HDS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/bb73d2/32.png) [@HDS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HDS)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2003, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-to-drive-your-cat-crazy/217130/6 "2003-12-05T13:06:55Z")
Oh, and can’t forget these! [cat hats](http://www.jamiewhite.com/html/clifford_s_cat_hats.html) ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2003, 1:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-to-drive-your-cat-crazy/217130/7 "2003-12-05T13:07:55Z")
My cat does not like the dog. If Bernie was abducted by aliens and never returned, I’d suspect the cat. ---
**Author:** ![raz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@raz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raz)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2003, 1:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-to-drive-your-cat-crazy/217130/8 "2003-12-05T13:30:06Z")
Put a longish piece of scotch tape down her spine. It makes the cat think that she’s walking under a low object and she’ll walk all crouched down. It’s really rather hilarious. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2003, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-to-drive-your-cat-crazy/217130/9 "2003-12-05T14:38:56Z")
I will always stand by the tried-and-true laser pointer. In fact, I’m buying the boys a new one for Christmas. _lol_ Mardi Gras beads wound around the midsection are also a great deal of fun. And don’t forget the old “catching invisible balls in the paper bag” trick. Drives the kitten _wild_ And last night, my smaller cat managed to get his head inside one of my gloves, then couldn’t get it off. I was laughing so hard, I couldn’t catch him to help. ---
**Author:** ![tanookie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/48db29/32.png) [@tanookie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tanookie)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2003, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-to-drive-your-cat-crazy/217130/10 "2003-12-05T14:42:55Z")
While I previously tortured my cats with laser pointers, copious quantities of catnip, static shocks and santa hats I have found something new to torture them with: Kids. My 2 1/2 year old will run endlessly with the cat toys enticing them to chase her and when they catch a toy she picks them up and they squirm away and repeat. We call it ‘catch and release’ kitty fishing. ---
**Author:** ![Podkayne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/edb3f5/32.png) [@Podkayne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Podkayne)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2003, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-to-drive-your-cat-crazy/217130/11 "2003-12-05T14:44:12Z")
Our cat loves nothing more in the world than when we crumple a small piece of paper into a ball and throw it for her to chase. It is sooooo easy to fake her out by just pretending to throw it. She’ll rocket across the living room and over the couch and spend a good couple of minutes searching for the little crumply ball, then come wandering back and demand that we throw it. So we fake a throw into the kitchen, which is even more fun because she can’t get a grip on the tile floor with her claws. This trick works about three times before she catches on and you actually have to throw the ball. ---
**Author:** ![DeVena](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/dec6dc/32.png) [@DeVena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DeVena)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2003, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-to-drive-your-cat-crazy/217130/12 "2003-12-05T15:09:05Z")
I’ll pet my kitty then push all her fur the wrong way. And leave it like that. She’ll sit there with her skin rippling for about a minute, with a look that tells me I’d be dead if she had opposable thumbs, then heaves the biggest sigh you’ve ever heard and starts licking her fur back into place. ---
**Author:** ![idiotboy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b487fb/32.png) [@idiotboy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/idiotboy)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2003, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-to-drive-your-cat-crazy/217130/13 "2003-12-05T15:46:52Z")
My cat LOVES to fetch those little furry catnip mice. And the little plastic rings that are left behind when you open a new container of milk. He’ll chase it, bat it around the floor a few times, then carry it to me and drop it at my feet. My cat HATES when the dog gets to them before he can! Oh, and he hates the reindeer antlers my wife bought for him. But she insists on putting the ridiculous things on his head every year and then taking pictures! Cats hate nothing more than incriminating evidence! ---
**Author:** ![Soul\_Brother\_Number\_Two](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/soul_brother_number_two/32/3515_2.png) [@Soul\_Brother\_Number\_Two](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Soul_Brother_Number_Two)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2003, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-to-drive-your-cat-crazy/217130/14 "2003-12-05T18:51:24Z")
I love to roll my fat ol’ Manfred onto his back during one of his naps, and shove my face into his luxurious belly fur, and rub his belly (which he hates A LOT) and kiss his nose and blow in his ears until one micro-second before he wakes up enough to tear my face off. Lather, rinse, repeat. ---
**Author:** ![Yamirskoonir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/c0e974/32.png) [@Yamirskoonir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yamirskoonir)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2003, 7:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-to-drive-your-cat-crazy/217130/15 "2003-12-05T19:08:25Z")
When my kitty is sitting on her haunches or laying down meatloaf style with her paws tucked under her chest: lightly touch the few tufts of fur that stick up slightly about 2/3 down her back. \ Repeat. \ Repeat, tickling at three times in rapid succession. \ Start to go to tickle again when kitty kamikaze attacks, sinking claws and teeth into hand while black claws rake my arm. HA! The other one I like is when kitty is sleeping on my stomach and _refuses_ to move. She’s like a deadweight. So I start to giggle slightly. Kitty moves as one with my diapraghm, bouncing up and down in rapidity. Look of consternation on her face is so funny that I begin to laugh harder. Then she’s really jumping. I laugh more, and finally she gets so disgusted that she gets up. Of course, she gets me back by trying alternately to insert her head into my mouth or biting/chewing on my chin when I’m talking on the phone. And there’s always the light claw to the lip if she thinks I’m nto paying enough attention to her… We’re codependent, my cat and I are. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Q.N.Jones](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/3da27b/32.png) [@Q.N.Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.N.Jones)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2003, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-to-drive-your-cat-crazy/217130/16 "2003-12-05T19:09:29Z")
Me too, **essvee** , except that my kitty, **Oedipuss Rex** (who posts here on occasion) just stares at me balefully, instead of ripping my face off. Something else I do to annoy him: wash his butt for him with a lemon-scented Wet One if he’s walking around with it smelling like poop. You should hear the indignant yowls! Also, I like to pick him up, plunk him on the top of my head, and yell, “CAT SCAN!” ---
**Author:** ![Q.N.Jones](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/3da27b/32.png) [@Q.N.Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.N.Jones)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2003, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-to-drive-your-cat-crazy/217130/17 "2003-12-05T19:19:20Z")
And I forgot the all-time biggest kitty annoyer in the world: _The Weekly Trimming of the Claws!_ Cosmic Creepers (not bolded because she hasn’t posted on the SDMB yet) takes it pretty well, but old **Rex** yanks his paw away, and squirms and pretends like he’s being hurt. Which I know is a total fake-out, because he flinches BEFORE I trim! ---
**Author:** ![LadyMack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/4491bb/32.png) [@LadyMack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LadyMack)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2003, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-to-drive-your-cat-crazy/217130/18 "2003-12-05T19:27:12Z")
Latch the cabinet doors. Hide the toilet paper/paper towels. Yank the shower liner back, so they get splashed. Pervert cats. Rub the hair on their nose backwards. Gather all their toys and put in one place. Use the can opener for MY food. Turn the stereo on full blast when they’re sleeping on it. Pretend to look for the person that goes with the voice on the answering machine. ---
**Author:** ![Q.N.Jones](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/3da27b/32.png) [@Q.N.Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.N.Jones)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2003, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-to-drive-your-cat-crazy/217130/19 "2003-12-05T19:41:30Z")
My pervert cats like to watch me strip, so I’ll often drop my clothes on their heads. They hate that. When they’re sprawled out in the middle of the hallway, I like to pretend that I don’t see them and that I’m going to step on the new “catskin rug.” ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2003, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-to-drive-your-cat-crazy/217130/20 "2003-12-05T20:01:51Z")
After twelve years, our cat will still herniate herself trying to catch the reflection of light from a pair of eyeglasses. If I just want to annoy her, I’ll click the ear pieces against the frame. She immediately starts looking wildly around for her little reflective “friend”. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-to-drive-your-cat-crazy/217130.md?page=2)