Care at all about what anyone else thinks about me
The big three things I carry in my purse are my wallet with keys attached, my bus pass container and my cell phone.
I only take these things out when using them, and immediately put them back in my purse. Yet I check and recheck to make sure they are still in there.
This. And checking my wallet three times in a row for the ticket before I leave for a concert.
ETA: after reading a bit more of the thread, yeah, cursing at computers and machinery. But I guess that’s what all engineers do…
Use a paper seat cover (AKA ass-gasket) in public restrooms. (On the very rare occasions when I have no choice but to take a dump outside the home).
I know urine is sterile. I have no problem slapping my bare bum on the seat at home (shared with 3 other people, including 2 gross teenagers) or in a hotel room. But anywhere else… I will be telling myself “this is purely psychological, it’s not necessary” while I’m fastidiously poking out the tongue and positioning it. If there aren’t any, I’ll improvise my own with toilet paper (not easy when it’s one of the bathrooms that dispenses individual folded squares).
Always end every fortune cookie fortune with “in bed”
I usually tip food delivery people very well - not because I’m generous (although I am) but rather because I am afraid that if I don’t, they will remember and the next time they deliver food to me they will have first spit in it or contaminated it deliberately first. I am kind of paranoid that way after reading some awful true stories of how some servers spit in food, ejaculate in it, etc. as revenge on disliked customers.
My wife has convinced me that you can get a bee to leave you alone by telling it “Go away” in a calm but authoritative tone.
And I always drum my fingers on the outside of an airplane whenever I board. It’s the only superstition I have, but it helps ensure a safe flight.
Guilty of the explaining things to my dogs as if they were other members of the household when I leave…
“Ok, so I’m off to the animal shelter…Oh, don’t give me that look, you have a nice home, food and bed, these dogs have NOTHING. Anyway, Kiddo will be home midday and let you guys out for a while. I won’t be back until late afternoon. Be good.”
Also, I have to walk to each back door and pull on it to make sure it’s locked, even though I can see it is by looking at the position of the lock on the handle.
I triple check that my coffee pot gets turned off.
I never understood why the hot plate doesn’t automatically turn off after a preset time. 30 mins would be ideal.
I always check the kitchen stove before going to bed.
Dammit, I’ll have to start doing that. Darn you to heck!
Two words: thermal carafe
Dave Barry once had a bit about how foods are color-coded: Red foods are used to make red body parts, like hearts and muscles, while green foods are used to make green body parts, like gall bladder.
So whenever I give blood, when I’m drinking juice in the canteen to recuperate, I always make sure to pick out a red juice, because it needs to be red to replace red blood.
It is the sign of a true New Yorker (like my wife) to know that the water in the bathroom is cooler than from the kitchen.
I still don’t understand why I fast on Yom Kippur, despite being an atheist. So does my wife.
Are we related? I do this all the time. I’ve got a little green worm named Cecil B. DeMillipede. He has a top hat, a wine glass, and occasionally wears spectacles. Makes me giggle at least once a day. :rolleyes:
I put all my bottles in order according to size. This pleases the god of order.
So that’s what I did wrong! My fortune cookie on Friday said, “The weekend ahead predicts enjoyment.” But today and yesterday were crap. Now, here’s the crazy part, things only went to crap after I got out of bed!
I used to treat inanimate objects as if they could feel pain, cursing and smacking balky machinery and electronics, but quit that behavior when I came to understand that I.O.s are people, too. Besides, punch a Buick? Painful, and no one wins.
Dan
The closet door needs to be pulled all the way closed, to prevent monster egress. If you leave even a crack, they can pull it open and commit nighttime atrocities.
However there is nothing under the bed but inanimate dust bunnies. People who believe otherwise - well, they’re nuts.
Here the closet sliding doors must be pulled all the way closed, to prevent feline entrance, where they anytime atrocities.
It’s totally irrational and superstitious, but I have ‘lucky’ aftershave I wear on days that for whatever reason, I feel like I might need a little insurance that things will go my way.