# Things You Don't Want To Hear On A First Date
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-dont-want-to-hear-on-a-first-date/662961
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion
**Created:** [July 8, 2013, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-dont-want-to-hear-on-a-first-date/662961 "2013-07-08T19:09:29Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@DMark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DMark)
#### Post date: [July 8, 2013, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-dont-want-to-hear-on-a-first-date/662961/1 "2013-07-08T19:09:29Z")
“Don’t worry - I think it is just a cold sore.”
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### Author:  [@Asimovian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asimovian)
#### Post date: [July 8, 2013, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-dont-want-to-hear-on-a-first-date/662961/2 "2013-07-08T19:19:11Z")
“…oh, and I invited my spouse to join us. You don’t mind, do you?”
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### Author:  [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)
#### Post date: [July 8, 2013, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-dont-want-to-hear-on-a-first-date/662961/3 "2013-07-08T19:24:54Z")
“No, no, the ankle bracelet lets me get this far, no worries.”
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### Author:  [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)
#### Post date: [July 8, 2013, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-dont-want-to-hear-on-a-first-date/662961/4 "2013-07-08T19:25:41Z")
“Um, no, can’t go in there. There’s this restraining order…”
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### Author:  [@ducati](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ducati)
#### Post date: [July 8, 2013, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-dont-want-to-hear-on-a-first-date/662961/5 "2013-07-08T19:28:22Z")
“It’s OK with me, but you used to be a dude, right?”
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### Author:  [@Deeg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Deeg)
#### Post date: [July 8, 2013, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-dont-want-to-hear-on-a-first-date/662961/6 "2013-07-08T19:28:32Z")
“This is my mother.”
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### Author:  [@Troppus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Troppus)
#### Post date: [July 8, 2013, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-dont-want-to-hear-on-a-first-date/662961/7 "2013-07-08T19:30:30Z")
The guys and I like to go to the gay bar to look for straight women who go there to dance and get away from men.
True story.
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### Author:  [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)
#### Post date: [July 8, 2013, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-dont-want-to-hear-on-a-first-date/662961/8 "2013-07-08T19:30:40Z")
“I can’t stay out past 9, the babysitter charges extra if I’m late.”
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### Author:  [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)
#### Post date: [July 8, 2013, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-dont-want-to-hear-on-a-first-date/662961/9 "2013-07-08T19:30:49Z")
“What do you mean you’re afraid? I have to walk back _alone_.”
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### Author:  [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)
#### Post date: [July 8, 2013, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-dont-want-to-hear-on-a-first-date/662961/10 "2013-07-08T19:35:21Z")
“Ah, the children of the night! What beautiful music they make.”
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### Author:  [@Tollhouse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tollhouse)
#### Post date: [July 8, 2013, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-dont-want-to-hear-on-a-first-date/662961/11 "2013-07-08T19:38:23Z")
I should let you know that technically, Im married, but…( fill in with any excuse)
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### Author:  [@Mr.Kobayashi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Kobayashi)
#### Post date: [July 8, 2013, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-dont-want-to-hear-on-a-first-date/662961/12 "2013-07-08T19:41:49Z")
“My favourite book? It’s really a toss-up between the _Twilight_ series and _Mein Kampf_…”
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### Author:  [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)
#### Post date: [July 8, 2013, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-dont-want-to-hear-on-a-first-date/662961/13 "2013-07-08T19:44:02Z")
Hi Dad. Looking sexy!
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### Author:  [@Procrustus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Procrustus)
#### Post date: [July 8, 2013, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-dont-want-to-hear-on-a-first-date/662961/14 "2013-07-08T19:45:36Z")
“Do you mind if I take notes? I like to post the highlights on SDMB when I get home.”
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### Author:  [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)
#### Post date: [July 8, 2013, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-dont-want-to-hear-on-a-first-date/662961/15 "2013-07-08T19:47:29Z")
"Um . . . do you know what “genital warts” are?
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### Author:  [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)
#### Post date: [July 8, 2013, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-dont-want-to-hear-on-a-first-date/662961/16 "2013-07-08T19:50:10Z")
Don’t worry - I only get morning sickness in the morning.
Regards,
Shodan
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### Author:  [@Rushgeekgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rushgeekgirl)
#### Post date: [July 8, 2013, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-dont-want-to-hear-on-a-first-date/662961/17 "2013-07-08T19:50:29Z")
I was not impressed with the guy who whispered in my ear before we even had dinner, “I sure hope you like to fuck a lot”. I don’t know if he thought he was being sexy or maybe that I’d appreciate his straightforward attitude. Either way I was quite uncomfortable.
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### Author:  [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)
#### Post date: [July 8, 2013, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-dont-want-to-hear-on-a-first-date/662961/18 "2013-07-08T19:53:27Z")
“But I’m in love with you!”
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### Author:  [@Arrendajo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arrendajo)
#### Post date: [July 8, 2013, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-dont-want-to-hear-on-a-first-date/662961/19 "2013-07-08T19:55:53Z")
This is going to be a great evening – just you, me and Jesus!
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### Author:  [@shiftless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shiftless)
#### Post date: [July 8, 2013, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-dont-want-to-hear-on-a-first-date/662961/20 "2013-07-08T20:07:25Z")
Uh oh, my husband just walk in! He wasn’t supposed to get out of prison until next week.
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