# Things You Never Thought You Would Buy In Your Lifetime, But Did **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [January 1, 2006, 6:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-never-thought-you-would-buy-in-your-lifetime-but-did/337931 "2006-01-01T06:50:25Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![DMark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@DMark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DMark)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 6:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-never-thought-you-would-buy-in-your-lifetime-but-did/337931/1 "2006-01-01T06:50:25Z")
I bought a toilet yesterday. Yep, toilet bowl, tank and toilet seat. We are having our bathroom floor tiled, and we have to pay to have the toilet removed during the process and figured we might as well buy a new one - a little higher and longer (we’re not getting any younger) and so we went to Home Depot and priced toilets. Gee, was that fun. Staring at toilets. Trying to compare which was better. Asking toilet questions. The funny part is, we were able to tile the floor and buy said toilet because my SO got a Royal Flush on a video poker machine last week and won $1,000. So, we used the money from the Royal Flush to pay for our new royal flush. Still - I never thought I would ever go out an buy a toilet. Ever make any purchases that you never expected to make? ---
**Author:** ![John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/2bfe46/32.png) [@John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Carter_of_Mars)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 6:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-never-thought-you-would-buy-in-your-lifetime-but-did/337931/2 "2006-01-01T06:54:45Z")
A fuckin’ computer! ---
**Author:** ![fishbicycle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/aeb1de/32.png) [@fishbicycle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fishbicycle)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 7:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-never-thought-you-would-buy-in-your-lifetime-but-did/337931/3 "2006-01-01T07:10:34Z")
Keeping with the porcelain theme, my set of new teeth is something I didn’t really have a choice but to buy. ---
**Author:** ![Euthanasiast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Euthanasiast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Euthanasiast)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 11:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-never-thought-you-would-buy-in-your-lifetime-but-did/337931/4 "2006-01-01T11:46:48Z")
If you told me six months ago that I would own a Harley (hell, any motorcycle), I’d have told you that you were out of your mind. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 11:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-never-thought-you-would-buy-in-your-lifetime-but-did/337931/5 "2006-01-01T11:54:38Z")
I own a stuffed armadillo. Yes, I do. I win. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![hlanelee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/3bc359/32.png) [@hlanelee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hlanelee)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 1:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-never-thought-you-would-buy-in-your-lifetime-but-did/337931/6 "2006-01-01T13:42:10Z")
Tampons! :eek: ---
**Author:** ![enipla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/54ee81/32.png) [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-never-thought-you-would-buy-in-your-lifetime-but-did/337931/7 "2006-01-01T14:25:30Z")
When my then future Wife and I went out and bought a toilet together, I knew we had a special relationship. ---
**Author:** ![Booker57](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Booker57](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Booker57)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 2:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-never-thought-you-would-buy-in-your-lifetime-but-did/337931/8 "2006-01-01T14:33:23Z")
Just this year, bifocals and a four-door Oldsmobile. Damn, when did I get old? ---
**Author:** ![parsnip](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/parsnip/32/4564_2.png) [@parsnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/parsnip)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-never-thought-you-would-buy-in-your-lifetime-but-did/337931/9 "2006-01-01T14:39:55Z")
I won’t be the first to say it, but the minivan I bought 3 years ago still makes me happy. Negative cool points, but happy. ---
**Author:** ![Martha\_Medea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/43a26b/32.png) [@Martha\_Medea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Martha_Medea)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 3:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-never-thought-you-would-buy-in-your-lifetime-but-did/337931/10 "2006-01-01T15:24:12Z")
A car. ---
**Author:** ![Shalmanese](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shalmanese](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shalmanese)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-never-thought-you-would-buy-in-your-lifetime-but-did/337931/11 "2006-01-01T15:57:34Z")
a subscription to an online message board ---
**Author:** ![Canadjun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/76d3ee/32.png) [@Canadjun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Canadjun)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-never-thought-you-would-buy-in-your-lifetime-but-did/337931/12 "2006-01-01T17:09:31Z")
> [@John Carter of Mars](#): > > A fuckin’ computer! I didn’t realize computers were available to help with that! Does it evaluate your performance, or what? ---
**Author:** ![black\_rabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/f19dbf/32.png) [@black\_rabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/black_rabbit)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-never-thought-you-would-buy-in-your-lifetime-but-did/337931/13 "2006-01-01T17:25:32Z")
A Toyota, though my wife tells me than when we hit the lottery, I’m still allowed to have my '73 1/2 Trans-Am SD 455. As long as I never drive it. ---
**Author:** ![Moirai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/96bed5/32.png) [@Moirai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moirai)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-never-thought-you-would-buy-in-your-lifetime-but-did/337931/14 "2006-01-01T18:23:09Z")
A fake Xmas tree. The hubby is allergic to real ones but I didn’t care… Then, we got the fake tree. Pre-lit. I will never go back. ---
**Author:** ![Frank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Frank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-never-thought-you-would-buy-in-your-lifetime-but-did/337931/15 "2006-01-01T18:40:14Z")
An iron. Then I bought some 100% cotton shirts by mistake. I really liked the shirts. ---
**Author:** ![liirogue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dbc845/32.png) [@liirogue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/liirogue)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-never-thought-you-would-buy-in-your-lifetime-but-did/337931/16 "2006-01-01T19:21:42Z")
A laptop A subscription to an online message board ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-never-thought-you-would-buy-in-your-lifetime-but-did/337931/17 "2006-01-01T21:04:11Z")
> [@Canadjun](#): > > I didn’t realize computers were available to help with that! Does it evaluate your performance, or what? The technology is referred to as “Internet Pornography”. Google for it at work, & see what you get. :dubious: 😉😛😃 If you actually do such a thing, you deserve _everything_ you get. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d26b3c/32.png) [@Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Blue_Sky)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-never-thought-you-would-buy-in-your-lifetime-but-did/337931/18 "2006-01-01T21:10:12Z")
> [@EJsGirl](#): > > A fake Xmas tree. The hubby is allergic to real ones but I didn’t care… Then, we got the fake tree. Pre-lit. > > I will never go back. I got one about 4 years ago. I really don’t care what kind of tree we have, but my wife would insist on asking me anyway. All I have to do now is put it up and take it down. Takes about 15 minutes. ---
**Author:** ![dinahmoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/8797f3/32.png) [@dinahmoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dinahmoe)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-never-thought-you-would-buy-in-your-lifetime-but-did/337931/19 "2006-01-01T21:10:42Z")
Grown up lady makeup. Like not from a drugstore. ---
**Author:** ![zenith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e19b73/32.png) [@zenith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zenith)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2006, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-never-thought-you-would-buy-in-your-lifetime-but-did/337931/20 "2006-01-01T21:39:08Z")
Another who never thought he’d get another computer “until they’re perfected”. Got by with a ridiculously-slow '97 model Compaq, bought at closeout in '98, until last November when I found out that my new printer needed more RAM to run it than my puny chassis could be upgraded for. Another thing I thought I’d never need was a cell phone. I finally got one for 2 reasons–I could never find a damn pay phone that worked and I took a job as a courier and found it to be invaluable for whenever I was out of range of the company’s Mickey Mouse 2-way radio system. Since I was an independent contractor, I got to take a writeoff on Schedule C at tax time. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-never-thought-you-would-buy-in-your-lifetime-but-did/337931.md?page=2)