# Things You Shouldn't Need To Tell People **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 4, 2021, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-shouldnt-need-to-tell-people/945674 "2021-07-04T19:29:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![Kzbre5m](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/f08c70/32.png) [@Kzbre5m](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kzbre5m)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2021, 11:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-shouldnt-need-to-tell-people/945674/103 "2021-07-08T11:08:57Z")
Regarding phone numbers (I think there was mention somewhere up thread): “Click and Clack, the Tappet Brothers” had 888 - Car Talk, which one would repeat “Triple Eight, Double Two, Seven Eight Two, Double Five”. At the other end of the spectrum, my old office direct line worked out in letters to some weird word. The field crew would call me occasionally and it was easier that way. Years later, same company, many moves and phones later, they still remembered my old phone number. Even now, so do I. ---
**Author:** ![teelabrown](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/teelabrown/32/8412_2.png) [@teelabrown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teelabrown)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2021, 12:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-shouldnt-need-to-tell-people/945674/104 "2021-07-08T12:21:36Z")
If you flip off every bad driver on the road, you will eventually flip off a psycho who may or may not have a gun. ---
**Author:** ![Jumpbass](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jumpbass/32/147_2.png) [@Jumpbass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jumpbass)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2021, 1:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-shouldnt-need-to-tell-people/945674/105 "2021-07-08T13:31:04Z")
> [@DrDeth](#): > > Do NOT cut bagels by slicing inward towards the web of your thumb. Bagels cut funny- they give all of a sudden. Don’t cut _anything_ towards your hand. Or any other body part. ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2021, 2:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-shouldnt-need-to-tell-people/945674/106 "2021-07-08T14:17:14Z")
> [@Monty](#): > > “Do not stand in the damn doorway!” > [@panache45](#): > > And do not just stand there when you get off the escalator! Related: when you pull from the street into a parking lot, _pull all the way in and keep going!_ (1) Do not leave your car’s ass hanging out in the street. (2) Be mindful\* that others may be turning behind you and they are trusting you not to stop and thus leave _them_ hanging out in the street, \*“Be mindful”-- HA! If people were mindful, we wouldn’t need this thread. ---
**Author:** ![DCnDC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dcndc/32/2842_2.png) [@DCnDC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DCnDC)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2021, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-shouldnt-need-to-tell-people/945674/107 "2021-07-08T14:29:32Z")
The dishwasher is an amazing wonder of modern technology, but it’s not magical. When you turn it on, what does NOT happen is a bunch of little gnomes run out and carefully hand-scrub everything you stuffed in there. Just because you can shove it inside the machine and shut the door doesn’t necessarily mean it’s going to come out clean. If you nest bowls and cups in there, only the one on the bottom will get cleaned, and even then only on the inside. If you are writing something just for yourself, scribble it however the hell you want. However if you are writing something for someone else to read, _it needs to be **legible** _. This is one of the most basic tenets of communication that a lot of very highly educated people (I’m looking at you, doctors), somehow fail to grasp. From many years ago and mostly irrelevant today, but: that tray is an optical drive, it’s NOT a cupholder! (yes, I did once actually have to tell somebody exactly this) ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2021, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-shouldnt-need-to-tell-people/945674/108 "2021-07-08T14:43:07Z")
> [@DCnDC](#): > > When you turn it on, what does NOT happen is a bunch of little gnomes run out… Then who’s eating up my snacks during the night, hmmm?? > [@DCnDC](#): > > From many years ago and mostly irrelevant today, but: that tray is an optical drive, it’s NOT a cupholder! (yes, I did once actually have to tell somebody exactly this)… I believe you are incorrect about this. The Car Talk guys told me it was a cup holder conveniently built into my computer. 🤨 ---
**Author:** ![Limmin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f04885/32.png) [@Limmin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Limmin)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2021, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-shouldnt-need-to-tell-people/945674/109 "2021-07-08T15:10:47Z")
Great advice here, I second the caution around bagels. There was even an article recently, that cutting bagels caused a lot more injuries than you’d expect. My big brother had a mentor who was good at giving advice. Sample: “You want advice? Here’s some advice: Don’t park under pine trees!” ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2021, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-shouldnt-need-to-tell-people/945674/110 "2021-07-08T23:04:40Z")
> [@EinsteinsHund](#): > > With your mouth, hands or your butt? Depends on what local fare I supped on the previous evenin’. 🤪 > [@running\_coach](#): > > You know those guys who play multiple instruments all at once…? I don’t want to toot my own horn, but. . . 😲 > [@Monty](#): > > “Do not stand in the damn doorway!” And don’t stand at the boarding gate’s “podium funnel” if you’re Zone 4 or 5, and they’re only boarding Zone 1 or 2. Tripler I am a goddamned prodigy at playing air guitar. ---
**Author:** ![EinsteinsHund](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/einsteinshund/32/8400_2.png) [@EinsteinsHund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EinsteinsHund)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2021, 11:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-shouldnt-need-to-tell-people/945674/111 "2021-07-08T23:27:48Z")
> [@Tripler](#): > > I am a goddamned prodigy at playing air guitar. But I bet you can’t beat me at air drums. I can play a set of at least a twelve toms fantasy battery, while gently kicking the hi-hat. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [July 8, 2021, 11:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-shouldnt-need-to-tell-people/945674/112 "2021-07-08T23:36:51Z")
> [@Tripler](#): > > Tripler > I am a goddamned prodigy at playing air guitar. - Sometimes I play the air cello. People always make room for cello. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2021, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-shouldnt-need-to-tell-people/945674/113 "2021-07-09T00:53:56Z")
> [@DCnDC](#): > > From many years ago and mostly irrelevant today, but: that tray is an optical drive, it’s NOT a cupholder! (yes, I did once actually have to tell somebody exactly this) And that’s a mouse, not a foot pedal (truth). ---
**Author:** ![EinsteinsHund](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/einsteinshund/32/8400_2.png) [@EinsteinsHund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EinsteinsHund)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2021, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-shouldnt-need-to-tell-people/945674/114 "2021-07-09T01:03:40Z")
Or a microphone (Scotty) 😉. ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2021, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-shouldnt-need-to-tell-people/945674/115 "2021-07-09T01:51:21Z")
I like it when other old people make references I understand. ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2021, 1:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-shouldnt-need-to-tell-people/945674/116 "2021-07-09T01:53:21Z")
I’m thinking of using this for a sig on my work email. ---
**Author:** ![EinsteinsHund](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/einsteinshund/32/8400_2.png) [@EinsteinsHund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EinsteinsHund)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2021, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-shouldnt-need-to-tell-people/945674/117 "2021-07-09T02:00:36Z")
> [@ThelmaLou](#): > > I like it when other old people make references I understand. That was a very back-handed compliment 😉. ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2021, 11:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-shouldnt-need-to-tell-people/945674/118 "2021-07-09T11:21:56Z")
> [@Tripler](#): > > And don’t stand at the boarding gate’s “podium funnel” if you’re Zone 4 or 5, and they’re only boarding Zone 1 or 2. Sorry, but this is now an entrenched American tradition (and I hate it). See “**[gate lice.](https://www.smartertravel.com/7-rudest-things-people-do-in-airports/)**” ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2021, 1:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-shouldnt-need-to-tell-people/945674/119 "2021-07-09T13:53:35Z")
> [@EinsteinsHund](#): > > That was a very back-handed compliment 😉. Well, what it lacked in sensitivity it made up for in pure, gushy sincerity. 😘 ---
**Author:** ![chela](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chela/32/21582_2.png) [@chela](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chela)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2021, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-shouldnt-need-to-tell-people/945674/120 "2021-07-09T14:12:38Z")
![](https://media1.tenor.com/m/FrpYrOpu62UAAAAC/celebrating-celebration.gif "Celebrating Celebration GIF - Celebrating Celebration Celebrate - Discover &...") > [@Tripler](#): > > I’m never too old to make fart noises around people like that. There’s always room at the top / bottom? for [professional flatulists](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Le_P%C3%A9tomane) ---
**Author:** ![chela](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chela/32/21582_2.png) [@chela](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chela)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2021, 2:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-shouldnt-need-to-tell-people/945674/121 "2021-07-09T14:22:17Z")
Have a sniffle or a little drippy nose? Please use a hanky or a tissue or the hem of your tshirt something besides the back of your hand. Once ok, that might’ve been involuntary swipe so now you have a slime trail on your hand your next movement should be in the direction of a wipe. ---
**Author:** ![gnoitall](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bb73d2/32.png) [@gnoitall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gnoitall)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2021, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-shouldnt-need-to-tell-people/945674/122 "2021-07-09T17:28:24Z")
It occurs to me that the phrase “butt trumpet” sounds ironically more euphonious than the sound it produces. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-shouldnt-need-to-tell-people/945674.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-shouldnt-need-to-tell-people/945674.md?page=7)