# Things you wish you had never learned **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [May 31, 2008, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-wish-you-had-never-learned/451309 "2008-05-31T23:33:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![CrankyAsAnOldMan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crankyasanoldman/32/11670_2.png) [@CrankyAsAnOldMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrankyAsAnOldMan)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2008, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-wish-you-had-never-learned/451309/61 "2008-06-03T15:27:21Z")
I wish I’d never visited the torture museum in Amsterdam. I can’t get some of the devices out of my head. ---
**Author:** ![Malthus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Malthus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malthus)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2008, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-wish-you-had-never-learned/451309/62 "2008-06-03T15:36:10Z")
[QUOTE=CrankyAsAnOldMan] I wish I’d never visited the torture museum in Amsterdam. I can’t get some of the devices out of my head. [/QUOTE] You aren’t supposed to actually _use_ the devices on yourself, least of all so that they become permanently imbedded. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2008, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-wish-you-had-never-learned/451309/63 "2008-06-03T15:48:07Z")
[QUOTE=Malthus] You aren’t supposed to actually _use_ the devices on yourself, least of all so that they become permanently imbedded. 😛 [/QUOTE] Crap, \*\*\*now \*\*\*you tell me! ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2008, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-wish-you-had-never-learned/451309/64 "2008-06-03T16:35:40Z")
[QUOTE=Solfy] I wish I had never seen the nature program where in a surinam toad was giving birth, if that’s what you want to call it. [/QUOTE] Curse you! I’d managed to forget about that beastie for _years_. ---
**Author:** ![Sunrazor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sunrazor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunrazor)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2008, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-wish-you-had-never-learned/451309/65 "2008-06-03T17:06:16Z")
Back in the late 90s, when the Internet was still new and wonderful to me, I was checking out stuff about tattoos and piercings and stumbled into a website for people who deliberately surgically mutilate their own genitalia. It was the plane-crash scenario in spades! It was utterly horrific, but I couldn’t stop clicking the “Next” button on the photo gallery. Yeesh! ---
**Author:** ![Malthus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Malthus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malthus)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2008, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-wish-you-had-never-learned/451309/66 "2008-06-03T17:23:23Z")
[QUOTE=panache45] Crap, \*\*\*now \*\*\*you tell me! [/QUOTE] I hear they want their “Choke Pear” back. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2008, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-wish-you-had-never-learned/451309/67 "2008-06-03T17:24:47Z")
[QUOTE=ArrMatey!] Something refered to by my screenwriting teacher as ‘Third appearance law’, when dealing with seemingly innocuous minor characters in films. It has variants in anime (‘third power-use law’) and action films (‘third (or fourth) nazi law’), but the basic root of it all has spoiled many a mystery movie for me. [/QUOTE] Yep. Add a [Chekhov’s Gun](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chekhov's_gun) to the mix and we might as well go for ice cream instead. For me, it was learning that figs are inextricably entwined with the reproductive strategies of a species of wasp - so much so that every fig ever grown has bits of dead baby wasp in it. I can’t eat fig newtons anymore. (Note: I’m not entirely certain that this is _true_, but I’m too scared to go research it.) ---
**Author:** ![Colophon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f05b48/32.png) [@Colophon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colophon)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2008, 7:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-wish-you-had-never-learned/451309/68 "2008-06-03T19:17:59Z")
Two words: Banana Phone. I learnt that song a few weeks ago “thanks” to the SDMB, and it will never leave my life. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Baron\_Greenback](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/baron_greenback/32/48_2.png) [@Baron\_Greenback](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baron_Greenback)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2008, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-wish-you-had-never-learned/451309/69 "2008-06-03T19:32:00Z")
[QUOTE=WhyNot] For me, it was learning that figs are inextricably entwined with the reproductive strategies of a species of wasp - so much so that every fig ever grown has bits of dead baby wasp in it. I can’t eat fig newtons anymore. (Note: I’m not entirely certain that this is _true_, but I’m too scared to go research it.) [/QUOTE] Richard Dawkins did a chapter on this relationship in one of his books. He didn’t specifically address the dead-baby-wasp content of fig newton, however. ---
**Author:** ![ArrMatey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/arrmatey/32/3522_2.png) [@ArrMatey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ArrMatey)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2008, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-wish-you-had-never-learned/451309/70 "2008-06-06T16:28:01Z")
[QUOTE=Colophon] Two words: Banana Phone. I learnt that song a few weeks ago “thanks” to the SDMB, and it will never leave my life. ☹ [/QUOTE] It’s one of my best friend’s ring tones. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2008, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-wish-you-had-never-learned/451309/71 "2008-06-06T17:38:48Z")
I have to say that I easily resisted every farking linkie provided in this twisted thread, but the one that had no link…could I resist? Oh no: [Banana phone](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rwvz1LNZ5OQ&feature=related) ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2008, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-wish-you-had-never-learned/451309/72 "2008-06-06T17:41:33Z")
[Anyone of these bothers me.](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_events_named_massacres) ---
**Author:** ![Raguleader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/258eb7/32.png) [@Raguleader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Raguleader)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2008, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-wish-you-had-never-learned/451309/73 "2008-06-07T01:00:46Z")
I wish I hadn’t learned that Mr Rogers was never in the Marines and was never a sniper, so I wouldn’t bash my head against a wall attempting to convince people that the story isn’t true. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2008, 2:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-wish-you-had-never-learned/451309/74 "2008-06-07T02:36:20Z")
[QUOTE=CrankyAsAnOldMan] I wish I’d never visited the torture museum in Amsterdam. I can’t get some of the devices out of my head. [/QUOTE] I so want to go to this museum! With my kids! I need more details! Yeah, and we’d do Anne Frank’s house, too. But a Torture Museum! SCHWEEEET! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-wish-you-had-never-learned/451309.md?page=3)