# Things you wish you saw more often in dating profiles **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 1, 2015, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-wish-you-saw-more-often-in-dating-profiles/729576 "2015-09-01T04:13:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 9\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![stillownedbysetters](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/41988e/32.png) [@stillownedbysetters](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stillownedbysetters)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2015, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-wish-you-saw-more-often-in-dating-profiles/729576/21 "2015-09-02T17:29:35Z")
> [@Construct](#): > > Yeah, God forbid men have any sort of biological impulse to prefer healthy, fertile women. And God forbid they make those preferences clear instead of being politically correct and wasting everyone’s time so as to not hurt someone’s feelings. Of course we all have preferences and deal killers when it comes to looks and personalities. Duh. But when you single out one trait and one trait only to disrespect, that’s unnecessarily cruel. If your profile says “no short, infertile, unhealthy, overweight, women with facial warts need apply”, it’s still telling us you are judgemental, but at least you are an equal opportunity offender, not just singling out one group of people to insult. ---
**Author:** ![stillownedbysetters](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/41988e/32.png) [@stillownedbysetters](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stillownedbysetters)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2015, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-wish-you-saw-more-often-in-dating-profiles/729576/22 "2015-09-02T17:34:18Z")
> [@Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](#): > > But isn’t that exactly what you _should_ want them to do, so you know right away that the guys like that are not for you? Up to a point that’s true. But it is still unnecessarily unkind to overweight people. “Fatties” or “Fat Chicks” are pejorative terms and in their own way are just as offensive as seeing the “N” word for blacks written on a profile. Those with profiles who say they are seeking someone whose height and weight are proportional are saying the same thing, but in a non-offensive way. I’m warned off that the person is a jerk when he uses pejorative phrases, but I hate that to be at the expense of someone else who would find that language insulting. ---
**Author:** ![mcgato](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ac8455/32.png) [@mcgato](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mcgato)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2015, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-wish-you-saw-more-often-in-dating-profiles/729576/23 "2015-09-02T18:24:26Z")
> [@ReticulatingSplines](#): > > I wish women’s profiles weren’t so fucking interchangeable and boring (I’m sure men’s are also terrible but I haven’t looked at any). I mean, granted, it doesn’t seem like men read them anyway, but can you blame us? You’re passionate about traveling. You do yoga. You have 1-2 cats. You love curling up with a book and a glass of wine. You like to go out sometimes and stay in and watch Netflix other times. Put up your skydiving photo and the one you took at Machu Picchu, and congratulations! You’re exactly like everyone else. You forgot to include the word serendipity somewhere in there. ---
**Author:** ![BlackKnight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/eb8c5e/32.png) [@BlackKnight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlackKnight)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2015, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-wish-you-saw-more-often-in-dating-profiles/729576/24 "2015-09-02T18:28:19Z")
> [@stillownedbysetters](#): > > To guys on dating sites - please don’t use language like “no fatties” or “no fat chicks” or the politically-correct disguise phrase “athletic build” in your profile. I’m with you on the “no fatties”, but what’s wrong with stating that you prefer an “athletic build”? I don’t see anything insulting about it. Also, “fat chicks” is nowhere near as offensive as the n-word. Sorry. There’s really no comparison. ---
**Author:** ![Philster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/13edae/32.png) [@Philster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Philster)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2015, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-wish-you-saw-more-often-in-dating-profiles/729576/25 "2015-09-02T18:37:51Z")
I’d like better pictures. Above all else, with the great resolution available on even the worst phones/cameras, could you post a clear picture… please. Actually, just better pictures in general. Can I see you with a normal face, in focus, in a normal setting? Apparently not. On-line dating is like life: Technically, there are things you should be able to say, but realistically, it’s better that you didn’t. If fat women contact you because you didn’t specifically mention you don’t like fat women, big frigging deal. But you’re probably getting more total contacts because you didn’t come off like a d-bag… which you technically can do, but in the real world, it’s best you didn’t. ---
**Author:** ![stillownedbysetters](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/41988e/32.png) [@stillownedbysetters](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stillownedbysetters)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2015, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-wish-you-saw-more-often-in-dating-profiles/729576/26 "2015-09-02T19:32:18Z")
> [@BlackKnight](#): > > I’m with you on the “no fatties”, but what’s wrong with stating that you prefer an “athletic build”? I don’t see anything insulting about it. > > Also, “fat chicks” is nowhere near as offensive as the n-word. Sorry. There’s really no comparison. Ok, you made me rethink the ‘athletic build’ phrase. It isn’t terrible. Pejorative words and phrases are bad. Period. They are meant to separate people into favored and unfavored groups. Some ARE more vitriolic than others, but I still maintain it’s a matter of degree and that all of them are just plain evil, both in intent and in effect. ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2015, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-wish-you-saw-more-often-in-dating-profiles/729576/27 "2015-09-02T20:17:17Z")
> [@dada2fish](#): > > As a currently single woman, who has considered putting up a dating profile, thanks for the points of view from the other side. > > Are some dating site better than others? OKCupid?Plenty of Fish? [Match.com](http://Match.com)? > or something else? I tend to see more of an urban/artsy/bohemian from OKCupid, and I suspect it trends younger. Match would be a little more professional/suburban. Neither of those are absolutes, of course; not every woman on Match has a white picket fence and two dogs. Couldn’t tell you about PoF. And tinder seems to be a bit of a thing these days. ---
**Author:** ![Slithy\_Tove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slithy_tove/32/18248_2.png) [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2015, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-wish-you-saw-more-often-in-dating-profiles/729576/28 "2015-09-02T21:44:15Z")
> [@Philster](#): > > On-line dating is like life: Technically, there are things you should be able to say, but realistically, it’s better that you didn’t. > > If fat women contact you because you didn’t specifically mention you don’t like fat women, big frigging deal. But you’re probably getting more total contacts because you didn’t come off like a d-bag… which you technically can do, but in the real world, it’s best you didn’t. women who post “I don’t date outside my race” take note. ---
**Author:** ![Bad\_News\_Baboon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5fc32e/32.png) [@Bad\_News\_Baboon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bad_News_Baboon)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2015, 4:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-wish-you-saw-more-often-in-dating-profiles/729576/29 "2015-09-03T04:24:08Z")
I wish men would do three things: 1. Write a profile. For all the women out there- the wine drinking, Machu pichu, laughter lovers- there are men with little to no profiles. Gimme something to go on, will ya? Coupled with the worst pictures (which one is you? Or “that cool, but you are 200’ from the camera”) 2. Actually read my profile. At 43, I’m really, really not into 20 year olds, despite what your milf pornsites say. 3. I always tried my best to respond with a no thank you if I was not interested. It’s the right thing to do. Please accept if I say we aren’t a match (why on earth would you want to date a woman that clearly has nothing in common with you? Why would you knowingly seek out a relation that will be unhappy?). And one more word of caution. I used to use Linked in, but that is no longer. I had the joy of discovering that my first name plus city and job instantly gave all my information. Note to guys: showing up at the work of a woman you have not met yet to “surprise me”? Yeah, DON’T DO THAT. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-wish-you-saw-more-often-in-dating-profiles/729576.md?page=1)