# Things you would never admit to inventing, if you had. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 8, 2011, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-admit-to-inventing-if-you-had/591985 "2011-08-08T20:12:57Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Harmonious\_Discord](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/74df32/32.png) [@Harmonious\_Discord](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harmonious_Discord)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-admit-to-inventing-if-you-had/591985/1 "2011-08-08T20:12:57Z")
The Microsoft Office paper clip. ---
**Author:** ![Bosstone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/22d042/32.png) [@Bosstone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosstone)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-admit-to-inventing-if-you-had/591985/2 "2011-08-08T20:19:02Z")
Son of a crap! I looked at the thread title and immediately thought, “Yes, _I_ created Clippy.” Then I clicked on the link. Beaten by the OP. Hmph. Runner-up: The Tiddy Bear. ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-admit-to-inventing-if-you-had/591985/3 "2011-08-08T20:20:22Z")
The fist pump. ---
**Author:** ![Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cab0a1/32.png) [@Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Man_With_a_Cat)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-admit-to-inventing-if-you-had/591985/4 "2011-08-08T20:22:51Z")
The gas chamber. ---
**Author:** ![Jaguars](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jaguars/32/5879_2.png) [@Jaguars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jaguars)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-admit-to-inventing-if-you-had/591985/5 "2011-08-08T21:03:30Z")
The Ford Pinto ---
**Author:** ![Omar\_Little](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omar_little/32/269_2.png) [@Omar\_Little](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omar_Little)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-admit-to-inventing-if-you-had/591985/6 "2011-08-08T21:08:36Z")
> [@Man\_With\_a\_Cat](#): > > The gas chamber. > [@Jaguars](#): > > The Ford Pinto Those are the same thing, right? ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-admit-to-inventing-if-you-had/591985/7 "2011-08-08T22:00:17Z")
Lee Press-On Nails. Trucknuts. The penis pump. My Little Pony. ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2011, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-admit-to-inventing-if-you-had/591985/8 "2011-08-08T22:16:36Z")
I once invented a mildly entertaining game for Facebook. For some reason, it got about 35,000 hits. Unfortunately, that was followed by about 35,000 email spams. We don’t speak of it here. ---
**Author:** ![antonio107](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/7ea924/32.png) [@antonio107](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/antonio107)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2011, 12:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-admit-to-inventing-if-you-had/591985/9 "2011-08-09T00:03:05Z")
My mother claims she invented those paper toilet seat covers you use in a public restroom, and someone just beat her to patenting it. Doesn’t seem like I’d want to be playing tennis at the country club, telling everyone I made my money in toilet seat wraps! ---
**Author:** ![Asimovian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asimovian/32/172_2.png) [@Asimovian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asimovian)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2011, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-admit-to-inventing-if-you-had/591985/10 "2011-08-09T00:04:32Z")
Nazism. ---
**Author:** ![Jaledin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Jaledin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jaledin)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2011, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-admit-to-inventing-if-you-had/591985/11 "2011-08-09T00:58:35Z")
Dildo. An I-Pod, or whatever they’re called. ---
**Author:** ![Harmonious\_Discord](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/74df32/32.png) [@Harmonious\_Discord](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harmonious_Discord)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2011, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-admit-to-inventing-if-you-had/591985/12 "2011-08-09T02:51:22Z")
Betamax ---
**Author:** ![chowching](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f14d63/32.png) [@chowching](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chowching)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2011, 2:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-admit-to-inventing-if-you-had/591985/13 "2011-08-09T02:56:45Z")
Human-flavored food. ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2011, 3:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-admit-to-inventing-if-you-had/591985/14 "2011-08-09T03:02:54Z")
> [@antonio107](#): > > My mother claims she invented those paper toilet seat covers you use in a public restroom, and someone just beat her to patenting it. Doesn’t seem like I’d want to be playing tennis at the country club, telling everyone I made my money in toilet seat wraps! Reminds me of the “Frasier” episode where it’s revealed that the family of Niles’ wife Maris made their fortune in urinal cakes, even though they told everyone their money was made from timber. ---
**Author:** ![Isamu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/7c8e57/32.png) [@Isamu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Isamu)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2011, 3:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-admit-to-inventing-if-you-had/591985/15 "2011-08-09T03:28:40Z")
Ｔｈｅ　ｐａｎｉｃ　ｂｕｔｔｏｎ　ｔｈａｔ　ｓｗｉｔｃｈｅｓ　ｙｏｕ　ｆｒｏｍ　ｇａｙ　ｐｏｒｎ　ｔｏ　ｒｅｇｕｌａｒ　ｐｏｒｎ　ｗｈｅｎ　ｔｈｅ　ｂｏｓｓ　ｗａｌｋｓ　ｂｙ． ---
**Author:** ![Koxinga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/4af34b/32.png) [@Koxinga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Koxinga)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2011, 3:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-admit-to-inventing-if-you-had/591985/16 "2011-08-09T03:52:44Z")
Spray-on bald spot cover. In an aerosol can! ---
**Author:** ![Snowboarder\_Bo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowboarder_bo/32/229_2.png) [@Snowboarder\_Bo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snowboarder_Bo)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2011, 5:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-admit-to-inventing-if-you-had/591985/17 "2011-08-09T05:00:44Z")
[The Cami Secret Boob Apron](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tieA5wfcgH4) ---
**Author:** ![AnalogSignal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/analogsignal/32/1085_2.png) [@AnalogSignal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AnalogSignal)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2011, 5:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-admit-to-inventing-if-you-had/591985/18 "2011-08-09T05:24:16Z")
Mortgage-backed securities. ---
**Author:** ![Sevastopol](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cdc98d/32.png) [@Sevastopol](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sevastopol)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2011, 6:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-admit-to-inventing-if-you-had/591985/19 "2011-08-09T06:49:13Z")
The speed camera; and waterboarding, but mostly the former. ---
**Author:** ![Harmonious\_Discord](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/74df32/32.png) [@Harmonious\_Discord](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harmonious_Discord)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2011, 10:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-admit-to-inventing-if-you-had/591985/20 "2011-08-09T10:59:26Z")
> [@Koxinga](#): > > Spray-on bald spot cover. In an aerosol can! I bought that once at a reduced price of 50 cents for Halloween instead of the normal temporary hair color. I sprayed it on a small area of arm and it was like tempera paint that you used in school. I can’t imagine how horrible it would have looked on a balding guy’s head. I went back and got the normal Halloween spray. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-admit-to-inventing-if-you-had/591985.md?page=2)