# Things you would never hear Dopers say **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 1, 2000, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-hear-dopers-say/24278 "2000-07-01T16:36:47Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![vanilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/f19dbf/32.png) [@vanilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vanilla)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2000, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-hear-dopers-say/24278/21 "2000-07-01T18:26:56Z")
Oops, did I SAY that?šŸ˜‰ Freak Freely: ā€œI donā€™t want to hear about dead chipmunks anymore!ā€ ---
**Author:** ![ruadh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/d2c977/32.png) [@ruadh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ruadh)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2000, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-hear-dopers-say/24278/22 "2000-07-01T18:28:41Z")
**bjorn** : God bless America! ---
**Author:** ![Silo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ac91a4/32.png) [@Silo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silo)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2000, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-hear-dopers-say/24278/23 "2000-07-01T18:34:20Z")
**Cecil Adams:** I really am Ed Zotti. ---
**Author:** ![Catrandom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7bcc69/32.png) [@Catrandom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Catrandom)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2000, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-hear-dopers-say/24278/24 "2000-07-01T18:51:34Z")
**Shayna:** Sorry, I donā€™t have time for your problems. Catrandom ---
**Author:** ![DarbyV](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/779978/32.png) [@DarbyV](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DarbyV)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2000, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-hear-dopers-say/24278/25 "2000-07-01T20:17:45Z")
tiggeril: I was watching Regis and Kathi Lee this morning and Reg said the funniest thingā€¦ ---
**Author:** ![Ayesha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c0e974/32.png) [@Ayesha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ayesha)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2000, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-hear-dopers-say/24278/26 "2000-07-01T20:26:55Z")
OK who wants to do me ? ---
**Author:** ![Scotticher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9c0ed/32.png) [@Scotticher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scotticher)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2000, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-hear-dopers-say/24278/27 "2000-07-01T20:28:41Z")
**DRY** : of course, everyone knows that the Shakespearean plays were REALLY written by Francis Bacon. (ducking, and running, hon!) Scotti ---
**Author:** ![single\_files](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8e7dd6/32.png) [@single\_files](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/single_files)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2000, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-hear-dopers-say/24278/28 "2000-07-01T20:30:23Z")
Monster104ā€¦ damn, I missed that one, Tiggeril, whatā€™d he say? ---
**Author:** ![beakerxf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bc79bd/32.png) [@beakerxf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beakerxf)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2000, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-hear-dopers-say/24278/29 "2000-07-01T20:44:14Z")
**danielinthewolvesden** : Um, Iā€™m not sure. Iā€™m not that familiar with Bible. **neuro-trash grrrl** : You know, I just never understood that whole Goth thing. ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2000, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-hear-dopers-say/24278/30 "2000-07-01T20:44:16Z")
**Ayesha** : Boy do I just love that wild, unprotected sex with several people a night, none of whom I know by name, nor will I ever see them again! And yā€™all can bite me! btw is that is off-color I apologize. Iā€™m just trying here. ---
**Author:** ![SeaDiver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@SeaDiver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SeaDiver)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2000, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-hear-dopers-say/24278/31 "2000-07-01T20:51:45Z")
**Doobieous** : I got so tanked last night ---
**Author:** ![Anti\_Pro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Anti\_Pro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anti_Pro)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2000, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-hear-dopers-say/24278/32 "2000-07-01T20:57:56Z")
Letā€™s see, yaā€™ll are doing SOoo well already! \*\* techchick, \*\* um, well, the computer plug is IN, letā€™s see what THIS button does! Oooopppps, shouldnā€™tha dun that! \*\* purplebear, \*\* quittcher gripinā€™ and get out of here! \*\* Democritus, \*\* I HATE pussycats! \*\* Nu Vo, \*\* well, of course I COULD get involved with this debate, but Iā€™m much too busy solving the Presidentā€™s problem with how we are to solve the crisis in Kosovo. \*\* Ruffian, \*\* Iā€™m against marriage and whatā€™s up with falling in love anyway?? Itā€™s all hype! \*\* Polycarp, \*\* :::::tongue sticking out to the side of his face trying to solve the tv guide puzzle.:::: before shoving it aside deciding it was just TOO tough.::::::: \*\* Smooth Operator, \*\* Get off my porch ya bunch of hooligans!! \*\* psycat, \*\* Democritus schmacritius, what a name!! ---
**Author:** ![beakerxf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bc79bd/32.png) [@beakerxf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beakerxf)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2000, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-hear-dopers-say/24278/33 "2000-07-01T21:25:28Z")
**Anti Pro** : Like hell am I going to treat you and your opinion with respect. You all can just bite me! ---
**Author:** ![Derleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Derleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Derleth)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2000, 9:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-hear-dopers-say/24278/34 "2000-07-01T21:31:55Z")
Anyone considering me? Or just the old farts of the SDMB? I doubtless havenā€™t been here long enough. ---
**Author:** ![SuaSponte](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/67e7ee/32.png) [@SuaSponte](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SuaSponte)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2000, 9:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-hear-dopers-say/24278/35 "2000-07-01T21:34:53Z")
**Gunslinger** : The 2nd Amendment has obviously been misinterpreted **pldennison** : Hey everybody!! Pig roast at my place Saturday! ---
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2000, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-hear-dopers-say/24278/36 "2000-07-01T21:52:02Z")
**pldennison:** Youā€™re right, Phaedrus. **Drain Bead:** Satan honey, would you consider cutting your hair for me? **ChiefScott:** Go Army! Beat Navy! (btw, youā€™ll never hear ME saying this one either.) **ChiefScott and/or Vestal Blue:** Flirting? Nahā€¦I never liked flirting much. And thank you for mineā€¦very timely, since Iā€™m down here in Memphis right now! Anyone want to try one for me that does NOT deal with my mother? ---
**Author:** ![beakerxf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bc79bd/32.png) [@beakerxf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beakerxf)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2000, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-hear-dopers-say/24278/37 "2000-07-01T21:54:02Z")
Ask and ye shall receiveā€¦ **Derleth** : I donā€™t really pay attention to how the government is run. To be honest, politics bore me. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_In\_The\_Cape](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9a140/32.png) [@Cat\_In\_The\_Cape](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_In_The_Cape)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2000, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-hear-dopers-say/24278/38 "2000-07-01T21:55:53Z")
**lolagranola** Iā€™m too proud for these game threads. Just remove that post about me. ---
**Author:** ![Milossarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Milossarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Milossarian)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2000, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-hear-dopers-say/24278/39 "2000-07-01T22:01:44Z")
**Tuba Diva** ā€“ Hm. You got me stumped, too. I guess some things about how this board works will always just be mysteries. ---
**Author:** ![Derleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Derleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Derleth)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2000, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-hear-dopers-say/24278/40 "2000-07-01T22:15:12Z")
Good one! Captures the essence of the things Iā€™d never say. Didnā€™t know anyone paid that much attention. [ul] [li] **matt\_mcl:** I donā€™t know about you, but Iā€™m voting conservative. Nobody needs welfare.[/li][li] **oldscratch:** Until China becomes a US-style capitalist democracy, Iā€™m boycotting it.[/li][li] **Olentzero:** Commie Bastards are usually trolls. Libertarian is an example of who should post here and run the country.[/li][li] **manhattan:** Iā€™m gonna let this troll-fest thread stay in General Questions, as I enjoy wading through miles of flames just to find a decent post.[/li][li] **DoctorJ:** I know itā€™s stupid, but Iā€™m gonna diagnose you and suggest medicine even though Iā€™ve never seen you.[/li][/ul] Hope those arenā€™t too far off. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-hear-dopers-say/24278.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-you-would-never-hear-dopers-say/24278.md?page=3)