# Things your parents did or said to you that really stuck **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 22, 2010, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-your-parents-did-or-said-to-you-that-really-stuck/554605 "2010-09-22T02:10:38Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![IvoryTowerDenizen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ivorytowerdenizen/32/17937_2.png) [@IvoryTowerDenizen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IvoryTowerDenizen)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2010, 10:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-your-parents-did-or-said-to-you-that-really-stuck/554605/41 "2010-09-22T22:37:18Z")
“Don’t say hate. We don’t hate XXX, we hate Hitler” “You’re smart” “The gays were in line with us in the concentration camps.” (my parents are survivors). ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2010, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-your-parents-did-or-said-to-you-that-really-stuck/554605/42 "2010-09-22T22:49:38Z")
> [@Joey\_P](#): > > > [@KinkiNipponTourist](#): > > > > “close your mouth when you’re breathing.” > > > > I dunno, I was kinda slackjawed as a kid. Now when I see people doing the mouth-breathing thing, I am instantly reminded of my stepmom telling me to stop this, and am immensely grateful. > > “Pick up your feet when you walk” My dad has actually fired people for dragging their feet. I’m sure it was for more then just that, and he might have been in a pissy mood when he did it, but I’ve learned that people who don’t pick up their feet when they walk tend to be lazy employees. > It’s one of those thing that no one will notice if you do pick up your feet, but everyone will notice if you don’t. Ummm … they could be lazy employees. Or they could have a physical disability like a limp. Or they could have busted their ass at the gym the night before (pretty much the opposite of lazy, if’n ya ask me) and are a little sore. Or … ---
**Author:** ![Gleena](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b3f665/32.png) [@Gleena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gleena)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2010, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-your-parents-did-or-said-to-you-that-really-stuck/554605/43 "2010-09-22T22:58:06Z")
From my great great aunt, who did most of the raising of me: When getting ready to leave the house, we did this every single time until I was a teenager: “LittleGleena, what are your manners?” “Yesma’am, noma’am, yessir, nosir, please and thank you and you’re welcome and thankyouverymuchIhadanicetime!” Then we could go. To this day I get weird if I try to leave somewhere without finding the host to say thank you very much I had a nice time, even if I had the most horrible time ever. Manners are awesome. Thanks Wese! (Obviously to some, we’re from Mississippi… 😃 ) ---
**Author:** ![Angel\_of\_Doubt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/7cd45c/32.png) [@Angel\_of\_Doubt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Angel_of_Doubt)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2010, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-your-parents-did-or-said-to-you-that-really-stuck/554605/44 "2010-09-22T23:18:03Z")
from mother - “You have an awful smile” ---
**Author:** ![Joey\_P](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/919ad9/32.png) [@Joey\_P](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joey_P)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2010, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-your-parents-did-or-said-to-you-that-really-stuck/554605/45 "2010-09-23T01:41:24Z")
> [@purplehorseshoe](#): > > > [@Joey\_P](#): > > > > “Pick up your feet when you walk” My dad has actually fired people for dragging their feet. I’m sure it was for more then just that, and he might have been in a pissy mood when he did it, but I’ve learned that people who don’t pick up their feet when they walk tend to be lazy employees. > > It’s one of those thing that no one will notice if you do pick up your feet, but everyone will notice if you don’t. > > Ummm … they could be lazy employees. Or they could have a physical disability like a limp. Or they could have busted their ass at the gym the night before (pretty much the opposite of lazy, if’n ya ask me) and are a little sore. Or … They could be, or they could just be lazy employees. 99% of our part time help is 15 -17 year old high school kids. A solid half of them turn out to be lazy slackers. It’s not just that they drag their feet, it’s that they carry one box at a time when they should be carrying three (this way they can make three trips out of it), it’s that they take a bathroom break every 45 minutes and you can hear them texting, it’s that a quick trip out to the dumpster takes them 10 minutes because it’s snowing and even though the dumpster is 20 feet from the building they go and get their hat and coat so they can smoke while their outside and on and on and on. An other wise good employee that happens to drag their feet is one thing, but an employee that can’t pull his weight is a different thing and sometimes dragging your feet is the final straw. ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2010, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-your-parents-did-or-said-to-you-that-really-stuck/554605/46 "2010-09-23T02:38:12Z")
From Dad: – No job is beneath you, if it pays an fair wage for an honest day’s work. – Everybody is worthy of respect, unless and until they demonstrate otherwise. Even then, you may have to respect them anyway, as at a job. Deal, but remember you need not be there forever. – Burn no bridges. – Never stop learning. It needn’t be book learning, though that’s good; but learn practical skills too. They will come in handy at the most unexpected times. – See your country; it’s big, and will take a while to see, but it’s a fascinating place. – Similarly, meet its people. They’re fun, friendly, and interesting. ---
**Author:** ![lindsaybluth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/90db22/32.png) [@lindsaybluth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lindsaybluth)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2010, 2:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-your-parents-did-or-said-to-you-that-really-stuck/554605/47 "2010-09-23T02:44:10Z")
> [@Joey\_P](#): > > 99% of our part time help is 15 -17 year old high school kids. I think that’s your problem right there! ---
**Author:** ![Joey\_P](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/919ad9/32.png) [@Joey\_P](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joey_P)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2010, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-your-parents-did-or-said-to-you-that-really-stuck/554605/48 "2010-09-23T02:50:25Z")
> [@lindsaybluth](#): > > > [@Joey\_P](#): > > > > 99% of our part time help is 15 -17 year old high school kids. > > I think that’s your problem right there! Probably, but it’s a small Mom and Pop type place. We couldn’t afford to replace $8.50/hr part time kids with $20/hour+benefit full timers. Besides, the lazy ones quit or get fired after a while and that leaves us with the good ones that tend to stay with us for many years. ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2010, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-your-parents-did-or-said-to-you-that-really-stuck/554605/49 "2010-09-23T03:03:37Z")
> [@](#): > > They could be, or they could just be lazy employees. 99% of our part time help is 15 -17 year old high school kids. A solid half of them turn out to be lazy slackers. It’s not just that they drag their feet, it’s that they carry one box at a time when they should be carrying three (this way they can make three trips out of it), it’s that they take a bathroom break every 45 minutes and you can hear them texting, it’s that a quick trip out to the dumpster takes them 10 minutes because it’s snowing and even though the dumpster is 20 feet from the building they go and get their hat and coat so they can smoke while their outside and on and on and on. An other wise good employee that happens to drag their feet is one thing, but an employee that can’t pull his weight is a different thing and sometimes dragging your feet is the final straw. I’m active on a couple of other forums. One place is largely inhabited by teenagers, who seem to think that they have some sort of Constitutional right to have their cell phones with them at all times. I would suggest that your dad institute a “no cell phones during work hours” condition of employment. Either the kids can leave their cells in the office safe, or they can leave them at home, or leave them in their cars. Anyone who actually NEEDS to get hold of the workers during the work day can call the shop number. You know, the “Mom’s in the hospital!” sort of thing, not the “OMG did you hear what Leslie did?!?” sort of thing. Whoever answers the phone can get hold of the worker quickly for the first sort of message, and coldly inform the caller that the worker is supposed to be WORKING for the second sort of message. This will speed up the time frame of finding out which workers should be fired. ---
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2010, 7:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-your-parents-did-or-said-to-you-that-really-stuck/554605/50 "2010-09-23T07:58:46Z")
My father, whose family was in the restaurant business, taught me how to cook. Damn handy skill. But his best advice is to do things for people, because it is always good to have lots of people owe you favors. It has come in handy, and is about to again. My mother, when I was a senior in high school, told me marriage is good for men because you can have your cook and eat her too. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2010, 10:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-your-parents-did-or-said-to-you-that-really-stuck/554605/51 "2010-09-23T10:36:35Z")
> [@corkboard](#): > > And one that he didn’t actually say in so many words but taught me by general discussion and example: “Let them underestimate you, then impress them.” For instance, in a business meeting, just because the other guy is in a $1200 suit and a Rolex doesn’t mean he’s going to be able to keep up with you and your $300 suit and a Timex. Put more energy into preparation and less into superficiality and you’ll be victorious because they won’t see you coming. Reminds me of something from my aunt. I remarked that people tend to underestimate me. She said “oOOooh, I love it when that happens. Makes the ambush easier and the pleasure when I see the look in their eyes so much sweeter.” ---
**Author:** ![Caprese](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a9a28c/32.png) [@Caprese](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Caprese)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2010, 11:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-your-parents-did-or-said-to-you-that-really-stuck/554605/52 "2010-09-23T11:44:14Z")
> [@Spoons](#): > > – Everybody is worthy of respect, unless and until they demonstrate otherwise. Even then, you may have to respect them anyway, as at a job. Deal, but remember you need not be there forever. My dad did not sit me down and lecture me with this sentence, but he did model this behavior for me, and it stuck. From my mom, who got it from her own mom: You can’t live other people’s lives for them. ---
**Author:** ![Lanzy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/74df32/32.png) [@Lanzy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lanzy)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2010, 12:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-your-parents-did-or-said-to-you-that-really-stuck/554605/53 "2010-09-23T12:11:51Z")
> [@Cat\_Whisperer](#): > > > [@Lanzy](#): > > > > I didn’t really get good advice\ > > No, you really didn’t. Were your parents career criminals or something? My stepfather (and everyone in his family was), my Mom was more an amateur. Most of my brothers and sisters have dabbled in petty crime. ---
**Author:** ![Unintentionally\_Blank](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/unintentionally_blank/32/5418_2.png) [@Unintentionally\_Blank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unintentionally_Blank)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2010, 1:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-your-parents-did-or-said-to-you-that-really-stuck/554605/54 "2010-09-23T13:04:13Z")
When you think the world’s going to end, and you have to do something drastic (sell the car, quit your job, move, etc)…wait. The world ISN’T going to end, and chances are, 24 hours later, something will come about that makes that critical MUST-DO decision irrelevant. You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2010, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-your-parents-did-or-said-to-you-that-really-stuck/554605/55 "2010-09-23T13:29:16Z")
I was reminded of two good ones. My mother always emphasized I should speak sweetly, and I’m glad she did. I can certainly speak sharply/coldly when I want, but I have cultivated my voice to be very sweet indeed. And, good posture. I hate slouching people. Not, slouching for five minutes but those who slouch everywhere they go. ---
**Author:** ![Try2B\_Comprehensive](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/try2b_comprehensive/32/65_2.png) [@Try2B\_Comprehensive](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Try2B_Comprehensive)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2010, 1:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-your-parents-did-or-said-to-you-that-really-stuck/554605/56 "2010-09-23T13:51:21Z")
> [@emmaliminal](#): > > What do you remember your parents saying or doing or teaching you that shapes you even now? Dad: If you don’t like it, you can leave. I left! ---
**Author:** ![Try2B\_Comprehensive](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/try2b_comprehensive/32/65_2.png) [@Try2B\_Comprehensive](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Try2B_Comprehensive)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2010, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-your-parents-did-or-said-to-you-that-really-stuck/554605/57 "2010-09-23T14:16:53Z")
Let’s not leave out, “You’re on your own.” Very inspiring:rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![MysteryFellow63427](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e4f/32.png) [@MysteryFellow63427](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MysteryFellow63427)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2010, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-your-parents-did-or-said-to-you-that-really-stuck/554605/58 "2010-09-23T14:29:22Z")
Wear your seat belt, every time. My parents (along with many others of the readers here, no doubt) were zealously religious about it, for which I thank them. ---
**Author:** ![salinqmind](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3ec8ea/32.png) [@salinqmind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/salinqmind)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2010, 3:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-your-parents-did-or-said-to-you-that-really-stuck/554605/59 "2010-09-23T15:22:56Z")
Oh, I’ve had a few. I wrote them down at one time to pass along to my offspring. - Silence is golden. (Think before you impulsively blat out the first thing that rattles around in your head.) - Things are going badly now, but it will get better. (Not necessarily. But 99% of the time, it does. Things change.) - I raised you to be a lady, act like it. (The world will try to drag you down. The world still respects a lady. You can rise above the world.) - Do it now, if possible. Don’t wait until ‘later’ (you may not have the time, money, energy, or ambition when ‘later’ rolls around. This is so true! The car may not start, you can get sick, something else comes up - so whenever possible, if I need to do something, I do it and get it over with.) - When you write a check, round it off, in your checkbook, to a higher figure and you will always have a little padding in your bank balance. (more useful in the past, some people todayhave never written a check.) Corollary: always carry a little spare cash in your purse or glove compartment. Just in case. - He’s not good enough for you. ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2010, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-your-parents-did-or-said-to-you-that-really-stuck/554605/60 "2010-09-23T15:31:12Z")
> [@salinqmind](#): > > Oh, I’ve had a few. I wrote them down at one time to pass along to my offspring. > > - Silence is golden. (Think before you impulsively blat out the first thing that rattles around in your head.) > - Things are going badly now, but it will get better. (Not necessarily. But 99% of the time, it does. Things change.) > - I raised you to be a lady, act like it. (The world will try to drag you down. The world still respects a lady. You can rise above the world.) > - Do it now, if possible. Don’t wait until ‘later’ (you may not have the time, money, energy, or ambition when ‘later’ rolls around. This is so true! The car may not start, you can get sick, something else comes up - so whenever possible, if I need to do something, I do it and get it over with.) > - When you write a check, round it off, in your checkbook, to a higher figure and you will always have a little padding in your bank balance. > (more useful in the past, some people todayhave never written a check.) Corollary: always carry a little spare cash in your purse or glove compartment. Just in case. > - He’s not good enough for you. Concur with all but the last one. - looks at beloved partner \* Ouch. Harsh. Hope his mom never said that about me. Og knows I’d never think it about him. ☹ [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-your-parents-did-or-said-to-you-that-really-stuck/554605.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-your-parents-did-or-said-to-you-that-really-stuck/554605.md?page=4)