# Things you're supposed to find sexy, but don't **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [May 8, 2008, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608 "2008-05-08T21:12:30Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/101 "2008-05-10T01:41:43Z")
Thongs are sexy. A little nicer than a naked butt in some respects, as the lines of the straps delineate the curve of the hips. I second tongue piercings as not sexy. I look at women with them and can’t help but think, “Somebody must have hooked her and thrown her back.” Also, collagen-injected lips. Yech. Small, expressive lips are just fine, you don’t have to look like you’re wearing a sideways vagina on your face. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 2:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/102 "2008-05-10T02:02:48Z")
Muscular men are not attractive to me. Clearly I’m not alone. If you are built like a linebacker I’m just not interested. Chances are, the more wimpy you look, the more I am going to be attracted to you. And while skinny tall guys can be cuties, I really go for the ones just a few inches taller than me. My husband is 5’7’’ and weighs 135 lbs. I think he’s perfect. Long hair on men is not sexy. Facial hair on men is not sexy. Nothing below a man’s navel is really very sexy at all, to be honest, except maybe his feet. I am more interested in mens’ ears than their asses. ---
**Author:** ![Elret](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b9bd4f/32.png) [@Elret](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elret)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 2:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/103 "2008-05-10T02:33:21Z")
[QUOTE=Slithy Tove] Got it - no VPL but no chaffed labia as from going commando. Ignorance fought. (though I still reserve the right to find middle age women who who wear thongs unattractive if worn not for your reasons, but because the porn starletts do. I could come up with my justufication for wearing skater boi baggy shorts myself, but I’d be pretty pathetic nonetheless) [/QUOTE] I can definitely agree with that! (Not with you being pathetic, I mean. Just the idea of people continuing to dress or act in a way they think makes them seem youthful when it in fact tends to have the opposite effect.) ---
**Author:** ![divemaster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/divemaster/32/78_2.png) [@divemaster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/divemaster)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 3:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/104 "2008-05-10T03:11:51Z")
Turn-offs: –tattoos –body piercings (ears are okay) –fake tits –leathery tans –bald snatch (trimmed is okay) ---
**Author:** ![elfkin477](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a9a28c/32.png) [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 4:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/105 "2008-05-10T04:04:05Z")
Uniforms. I know lots of women drool over men in any sort of uniform, but they don’t do anything for me. A nice shirt and slacks will get my attention, but not a uniform. Tallness. Any taller than 6’ is verging on too tall. And tallness coupled with skinniness is a **total** turn off. I can’t help but be reminded of my grandfather shortly before he died of cancer. I’m a bit confused about all the body-builder comments. Are we _supposed_ to find that attractive? I’ve never met a woman who liked that look. I always figured body-builders were so vain they didn’t care that women don’t like the pop-viened look. ---
**Author:** ![F.U.Shakespeare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/aca169/32.png) [@F.U.Shakespeare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/F.U.Shakespeare)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 4:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/106 "2008-05-10T04:31:51Z")
[QUOTE=Licentious Ectomorph] Actually, I know where you’re coming from. I’m a gay male too, but occasionally there’s a woman who makes my few hetero instincts tingle. [/QUOTE] I remember when the movie ‘Striptease’ came out, I was trying to describe to a gay friend how attractive Demi Moore was. He replied, "F., I’m _gay._ I’m not **dead!"** ---
**Author:** ![Cicero](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cicero/32/3594_2.png) [@Cicero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cicero)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 9:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/107 "2008-05-10T09:55:32Z")
[QUOTE=Shagnasty] Me too for tattoos. It is so bad that I can’t continue to look at otherwise hot women with one, especially a big one. Piercings are terrible as well. I am not a fan of big breasts either. It is more about the form and a DD is going to have trouble in that category. [/QUOTE] Heh - agreeing totally with **Shagnasty**. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Chanteuse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9de053/32.png) [@Chanteuse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chanteuse)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 2:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/108 "2008-05-10T14:34:07Z")
[QUOTE=Rascal’s Mom] Big guys rock. Love 'em. [/QUOTE] I thought that Mark Addy was HOT in _The Full Monty_. ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 2:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/109 "2008-05-10T14:37:06Z")
\*Tattoos - Especially those hip-to-hip Buick insignias stamped above the butt-cheeks or those shoulder-to-wrist frescoes. (And Please Og, don’t tell me why. I don’t want to know. Really.) \*Piercings. \*CROCs. \*High-heels with jeans (especially if they’re from some designer that I’m supposed to know or cost some multiple of your car/rent/mortgage payment). - Shirts/tops that can’t manage to reach your jeans belt loops. ---
**Author:** ![JThunder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e95f7d/32.png) [@JThunder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JThunder)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/110 "2008-05-10T14:43:26Z")
Angelina Jolie and Jennifer Lopez. ---
**Author:** ![Tristan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tristan/32/18058_2.png) [@Tristan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tristan)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 3:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/111 "2008-05-10T15:17:14Z")
[QUOTE=CalMeacham] **Bouv** , where do you hang out, and what do you watch? I’ve _never_ seen this, even in the R- and higher stuff I’ve seen. [/QUOTE] If you are a user of any well tagged porn forum or illegal downloading site, do a search for A2M, or ATM. It’s quite common these days. I find it oddly appealing, as it feeds into the whole “What a dirty filthy slut she becomes!” idea. But it can be overdone. And ladies… I am overweight, and not super cocky, and not rich. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Rascal\_s\_Mom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/a698b9/32.png) [@Rascal\_s\_Mom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rascal_s_Mom)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 3:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/112 "2008-05-10T15:23:26Z")
[QUOTE=Chanteuse] I thought that Mark Addy was HOT in _The Full Monty_. [/QUOTE] Never seen it. _Oh, Netflix…_ ---
**Author:** ![Incubus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c68b51/32.png) [@Incubus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Incubus)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/113 "2008-05-10T15:43:02Z")
Thongs. When I was younger I thought the idea of women in thongs was pretty hot, but then I got a little older and realized that many women don’t have the idealized ‘thong butt’ you might see in magazines/strip clubs/etc. As horrible as it sounds, ‘real woman butt’ ruined thongs for me. I’d say the majority of women don’t have unrealistically perfect globular asscheeks, and thus you’re likely seeing a thong sandwiched between potentially pimpled, misshapen, lumpy stretchmarked cheeks. Not that there’s anything wrong with pimpled misshapen lumpy stretchmarked ladybutt. I’m just saying it doesn’t look flattering in a thong. So generally I’d prefer to see women in underwear that covers a little more ham so to speak (I like seeing women in boyshorts, btw, which I think look flattering on far more women’s bodies than thongs do) Fake boobs. I actually like big boobs on women (small boobs are fine too, I like them in general) but the way fake boobs tend to sit is a dealbreaker for me. In a lot of before/after pictures I’ve seen, the woman looked fine in the before pictures. I’d say 99% of women with implants look unnatural in the way the breasts sit on their chest; I’d much prefer a home grown set, sagginess and all than a set that looks like it was carved out of a block of rubber. 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![pepperlandgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f17d59/32.png) [@pepperlandgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pepperlandgirl)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/114 "2008-05-10T17:26:32Z")
Straight porn. I’m not really attracted to women, I don’t find vaginas sexy, and the mechanical nature of the sex in straight porn bores me to tears. Plus the men in straight porn are generally really ugly. Usually when I watch one, I just get the vague feeling that I never want to have sex again. ---
**Author:** ![DianaG](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7ab992/32.png) [@DianaG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DianaG)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/115 "2008-05-10T18:09:33Z")
> [@Slithy Tove](#): > > Got it - no VPL but no chaffed labia as from going commando. Ignorance fought. > > (though I still reserve the right to find middle age women who who wear thongs unattractive if worn not for your reasons, but because the porn starletts do. I could come up with my justufication for wearing skater boi baggy shorts myself, but I’d be pretty pathetic nonetheless) Oh, I don’t object to you not finding it sexy for any reason you like! I take great pains to not display visible thong, the same way I take great pains to not display my undergarments in general (though that’s not a “middle-aged” thing, that’s an “underwear belong _under_” thing). But visible thong is still sexier than chafed labia. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![as\_u\_wish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/6f9a4e/32.png) [@as\_u\_wish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/as_u_wish)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/116 "2008-05-10T18:25:10Z")
Hmm. Third page and no one’s mentioned my issue. So I’ll just 'fess up and go stand alone in the corner. I don’t find nudity sexy. At all. Not in men. Not in women. Interesting on occasion, attractive on occasion. Frequently functional. The generally prefered state in a healthy sexual encounter. But not sexy per se. The flow of a skirt, the swell of an arm muscle, the twinkle of an eye–all sexy as hell. But random nakedness, genital closeups, plunging necklines–don’t do a thing for me. ---
**Author:** ![DianaG](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7ab992/32.png) [@DianaG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DianaG)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/117 "2008-05-10T19:24:27Z")
[QUOTE=Count Blucher] \*CROCs. [/QUOTE] I am 100% certain that you’re not supposed to find Crocs sexy. ---
**Author:** ![gallows\_fodder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8c91f0/32.png) [@gallows\_fodder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gallows_fodder)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/118 "2008-05-10T20:01:55Z")
[QUOTE=as\_u\_wish] But random nakedness, **genital closeups** , plunging necklines–don’t do a thing for me. [/QUOTE] I was just thinking about this in the shower this morning. Endless closeups in porn – WTF is up with that? They actively turn me off. I don’t really find porn sexy to start with (I’m more interested in the context of sex than the mechanics, and porn usually doesn’t deliver on that front), and closeups epitomize exactly what I dislike. ETA: what **pepperlandgirl** said, too. And upon further thought, I agree with you **as\_u\_wish**. Nudity doesn’t thrill me, either. I’d much rather contemplate a man’s hands or his face (especially if he has a long, aquiline nose _swoon_). ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/119 "2008-05-10T21:40:43Z")
[QUOTE=DianaG] I am 100% certain that you’re not supposed to find Crocs sexy. [/QUOTE] Lets send a message back to the design team: works 100% as intended. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/120 "2008-05-10T22:23:18Z")
Another vote for piercing. I could _maybe_ get into nipple rings if matched the rest of the package perfectly, otherwise forget it. Another vote for thongs. Now a reasonably well cut leotard that shows a lot of hip/buttock is nice, but dental floss thongs? Nuh-uh. Another vote for supermodels. Now very rarely you will see a woman who is truly, naturally elfenly slender; and depending on everything else they can be exotically beautiful. But if you don’t naturally have that bone structure already, forget it. No amount of starvation is going to duplicate the look. Re big boobs: I’ll say that the larger breasts are, the better they have to look, since the size makes them so “in your face”. At the other end of the spectrum, very small breasts have to be cute and attractive enough to make up for being so minimal. In other words, quality not quantity. Garter belts- well, to me neither sexy or unsexy in their own right; it’s the **stockings** or panty hose that are important. I definitely don’t like the look of barely-midthigh stockings with super long garter straps made even more prominent by lacework. In short, the garter belt should be there for the stocking’s sake, not the other way around. Dominatrixes. While an assertive, seductive woman who takes the initiative can be very hot, I get absolutely nothing out of pain and humilation. I’ve already had enough in my non-sexual life to last a lifetime. I won’t even comment on the idiocies of porn. "Nuff said. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608.md?page=7)