# Things you're supposed to find sexy, but don't **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [May 8, 2008, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608 "2008-05-08T21:12:30Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 7
**Author:** ![Cisco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/121 "2008-05-10T22:55:55Z")
Tattoos are generally a turn-off. Fake boobs are a huge turn-off, and huge fake ones are actually nauseating. The half-cantaloupes on a toothpick frame? They really make me want to vomit. ---
**Author:** ![VarlosZ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d78d45/32.png) [@VarlosZ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VarlosZ)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2008, 9:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/122 "2008-05-11T21:31:50Z")
As for everyone else, the stereotypical porn star look (giant fake boobs, dyed blond hair, shaved crotch, tons of makeup, high heels during sex, etc.) is a complete turnoff for me. In fact, I don’t personally know anyone who’s more attracted to typical porn stars than to pretty girls with a “normal human female” look. So why is that ridiculous look mainstream? It really baffles me. The high heels thing, in particular, I never got. It’s just so distracting. “You’re gonna wear those to bed? Really? But you’ll rip up the sheets, and maybe my skin, too. Be practical.” Very skinny girls are a turn-off, and medium-skinny is at best a neutral characteristic for me. Give me girls with meat on their bones in the right places, even if a little meat in the wrong places goes with it. Don’t like tats or piercings, either. Oh, and another vote for short hair. And glasses. And non-blond hair. Basically, [this](http://www.umsl.edu/~ccj/images/velma.jpg) is my dream girl. . . ---
**Author:** ![zenith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e19b73/32.png) [@zenith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zenith)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2008, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/123 "2008-05-12T01:55:53Z")
Dancers at the local titty bars. I knew a co-worker who told a lot of horror stories about his “old” life prior to meeting his wife. He hung out in those bars, took those women home, and found that most of them were nucking futs and/or thieves. One woke him up in the middle of the night by burning his skin with the end of a lighted cigarette, then screaming at him that he had, “no right to hurt me like that”, WTF that meant. Another threatened to tell Mom what her “evil stepdad”; for whom she obviously mistook my co-worker; was up to. If I ever find myself single again, I ain’t going in THOSE places. I also find the shaved labia unattractive. If it’s bald due to chemo, that’s one thing, but deliberately made so, NO! Actually, I think a fetish for such a thing shows a pedophilic tendency; wanting women to look like little girls down there. ---
**Author:** ![Kilvert\_s\_Pagan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/c37758/32.png) [@Kilvert\_s\_Pagan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kilvert_s_Pagan)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2008, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/124 "2008-05-12T02:01:35Z")
Sara Jessica Parker. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![VarlosZ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d78d45/32.png) [@VarlosZ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VarlosZ)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2008, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/125 "2008-05-12T02:46:17Z")
[QUOTE=zenith] I also find the shaved labia unattractive. If it’s bald due to chemo, that’s one thing, but deliberately made so, NO! [/quote] :dubious: > [@](#): > > Actually, I think a fetish for such a thing shows a pedophilic tendency; wanting women to look like little girls down there. :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![davidm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidm/32/225_2.png) [@davidm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davidm)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2008, 2:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/126 "2008-05-12T02:59:48Z")
Ditto on the tattoos and the facial jewelry. A tasteful stud on the side of the nose I can accept, but nose and lip rings or stuff in the eyebrows, or a stud in the middle of the chin? Ugh. There’s also a limit to how many pieces of hardware you should have in your ear. Pierced nipples? A total turnoff. ---
**Author:** ![davidm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidm/32/225_2.png) [@davidm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davidm)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2008, 3:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/127 "2008-05-12T03:01:23Z")
[QUOTE=Kilvert’s Pagan] Sara Jessica Parker. 😃 [/QUOTE] I second that. ---
**Author:** ![madmonk28](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madmonk28/32/20811_2.png) [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2008, 3:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/128 "2008-05-12T03:55:50Z")
Strip clubs, I’ve been a couple of times for bachelor parties and I find them to be almost heartbreakingly depressing. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2008, 4:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/129 "2008-05-12T04:00:28Z")
[QUOTE=madmonk28] Strip clubs, I’ve been a couple of times for bachelor parties and I find them to be almost heartbreakingly depressing. [/QUOTE] You too? I went to one once, and found it to be very lonely. ---
**Author:** ![trupa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/aeb1de/32.png) [@trupa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/trupa)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2008, 4:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/130 "2008-05-12T04:25:31Z")
[QUOTE=Sunspace] You too? I went to one once, and found it to be very lonely. [/QUOTE] …sigh… They used to be totally exciting when I had just turned 18 and was finally legal to get inside, but later, I had to take customers there every time I went to Toronto, and it became work. I found myself playing surgical scar bingo in my head, and the number of cesarean scars (_just about all vertical, they didn’t seem to do too many bikini incisions back then_) was just depressing. Oh, and: [ul] [li]model-thin women. I feel they look unwell. Give me curves and a well tapered thigh, not a length of electrical conduit and xylophone ribs.[/li][li]heroin addict dark eye make-up[/li][li]stupidity. I was totally in infatuation with Liv Tyler until I heard her talk. Dammit, I want my fantasy Arwen back.[/li][li]Sports Illustrated swimsuit edition and Victoria’s Secret catalogs. Admittedly the models are not quite as anorexic as runway models, although sometimes they are, but they’re trying so hard to be all serious or sultry, there’s no hint of mischief or flirtation. Might as well be looking at the Sears catalog.[/li][/ul] ---
**Author:** ![pretend\_my\_name\_is\_witty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/b9e5f3/32.png) [@pretend\_my\_name\_is\_witty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pretend_my_name_is_witty)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2008, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/131 "2008-05-12T14:58:42Z")
Another vote for girl-on-girl. Unless there’s actually a place for _me_ in that scene, I’m quite happy to let them get on with it; they look like they’re enjoying it enough. I get that seeing hot naked girls at once is awesome, but once they eliminate the need/want for a male I lose interest. ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2008, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/132 "2008-05-12T15:06:33Z")
[QUOTE=madmonk28] Strip clubs, I’ve been a couple of times for bachelor parties and I find them to be almost heartbreakingly depressing. [/QUOTE] I’m pretty sure I’ve posted the story of being cast in a commercial for a strip club, and spending a day there (during off hours) for the shoot, but it’s not coming up on any of my searches. Short version: It was just as depressing behind-the-scenes as it was in “performance mode.” More, actually. ---
**Author:** ![DigitalC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ebca7d/32.png) [@DigitalC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DigitalC)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2008, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/133 "2008-05-12T15:41:39Z")
[QUOTE=InvisibleWombat] And while I’ve yet to find anything that turned me on about a guy (I suppose I’m incurably heterosexual), there are several things that turn me off. One is the whole shaved-chest look. You’re past puberty now. Why are you trying to look like a child? [/QUOTE] Some of us are long past puberty and still have zero chest hair. Tattoos, facial piercings, huge boobs, fake orange tans… it would seem nobody likes this things and yet they are extremely popular. Most women here don’t seem to like muscly guys yet all my friends who spend hours a day at the gym have pussy practically throwing themselves at them. ---
**Author:** ![Antigen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/848f3c/32.png) [@Antigen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antigen)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2008, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/134 "2008-05-12T15:56:23Z")
[QUOTE=DigitalC] Most women here don’t seem to like muscly guys yet all my friends who spend hours a day at the gym have pussy practically throwing themselves at them. [/QUOTE] Well, the _sluts_ will throw themselves at anyone. We’re a much classier and choosy crowd here. ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2008, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/135 "2008-05-12T15:57:44Z")
[QUOTE=DigitalC] it would seem nobody likes this things and yet they are extremely popular. [/QUOTE] But keep in mind you’re only getting one side of the story. This thread is specifically devoted to things people _don’t_ find sexy. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2008, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/136 "2008-05-12T15:59:45Z")
[QUOTE=Thudlow Boink] But keep in mind you’re only getting one side of the story. This thread is specifically devoted to things people _don’t_ find sexy. [/QUOTE] And of course, just because _I_ am not thrilled by frills doesn’t mean other people aren’t… ---
**Author:** ![Gary\_Robson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gary_robson/32/3448_2.png) [@Gary\_Robson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gary_Robson)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2008, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/137 "2008-05-12T16:23:35Z")
[QUOTE=Kilvert’s Pagan] Sara Jessica Parker. 😃 [/QUOTE] Oh, good. I’m glad I’m not the only one that looked at that show and said, “With a title like that, why couldn’t they have found someone pretty for the lead role?” ---
**Author:** ![Cisco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2008, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/138 "2008-05-12T17:19:52Z")
> [@trupa](#): > > stupidity. I was totally in infatuation with Liv Tyler until I heard her talk. Dammit, I want my fantasy Arwen back. I couldn’t agree more. I had the same experience with Ellen Page. That girl should be contractually obligated not to open her mouth after the director yells cut. [QUOTE=InvisibleWombat] there are several things that turn me off. One is the whole shaved-chest look. You’re past puberty now. Why are you trying to look like a child? [/QUOTE] Hey, take it easy, I’m almost 27 and I don’t have chest hair. ---
**Author:** ![Gary\_Robson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gary_robson/32/3448_2.png) [@Gary\_Robson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gary_Robson)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2008, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/139 "2008-05-12T19:47:27Z")
[QUOTE=Cisco] Hey, take it easy, I’m almost 27 and I don’t have chest hair. [/QUOTE] My apologies, **Cisco** and **DigitalC** –I didn’t phrase that well and I didn’t mean to cause offense. I have no problem with people who don’t _have_ chest hair (or any other kind of hair, for that matter). I just don’t understand the ones who remove it. ---
**Author:** ![Swallowed\_My\_Cellphone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9d8465/32.png) [@Swallowed\_My\_Cellphone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Swallowed_My_Cellphone)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2008, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608/140 "2008-05-12T19:55:52Z")
[QUOTE=Sunspace] Lingerie. Lingerie inspires a hearty _meh_ in me, though a woman can certainly be attractive in spite of it. I _much_ prefer a T-shirt/pyjamas look. [/QUOTE] I find lingerie to be a total turn-off. I actually find it trashy, no matter how “tasteful” or expensive it’s purported to be. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608.md?page=6) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youre-supposed-to-find-sexy-but-dont/448608.md?page=8)