# Things you've been surprised you've had to explain at work
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion
**Created:** [May 13, 2021, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959 "2021-05-13T02:42:26Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 6
### Author:  [@Filbert](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Filbert)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2021, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/101 "2021-05-13T20:35:03Z")
Regarding the left-right hijack, as a kid I managed to crush a fingertip in a door. It’s still really wonky looking. My parents actually offered to pay for plastic surgery to get it looking normal again, but I refused- if it was normal, I’d lose my ability to subtly rub my fingertips together to check which hand is my right, and would have to resort to the much more visible ‘L’ trick…
I’m somewhat cross-dominant, incidentally. I tend to pick up juggling tricks a lot faster with my left, for a start.
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### Author:  [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2021, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/102 "2021-05-13T20:41:46Z")
I know how to address an envelope, but I can’t remember the last time I’ve had to do so. It’s probably been years. I could see a young adult never having had to do it.
Now, if I have to write out a physical check instead of pay online, I really have to think about how to do it. The whole thing is so archaic.
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### Author:  [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2021, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/103 "2021-05-13T20:47:26Z")
> [@jnglmassiv](#):
>
> I’ve had coworkers that often need to calculate pretty simple things like markups and discounts and can’t do it without a percent button on a calculator.
How do they navigate stores with all the sales: “Buy Two, Get Another Half Off!”\*, and the sign I saw in a Goodwill: _“All 30% Sales Items Now an Additional 20% Off!”_
Just decide to buy 'em and see what the total comes to at the register? (Though I’d bet even if you asked a clerk they couldn’t explain…)
\*NOT a great deal… (I knew you were wondering)
.
> [@madmonk28](#):
>
> Now, if I have to write out a physical check
Last time I did this (a year ago?) I narrated it to myself in a flabbergasted tone, as if to say “WHY am I finding a tiny sticker with a denomination on it, and LICKING it?”
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### Author:  [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2021, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/104 "2021-05-13T20:51:09Z")
And why am I writing in cursive like Ben Franklin? It’s all so comically old timey.
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### Author:  [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2021, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/105 "2021-05-13T20:55:53Z")
In 2002 or thereabouts I worked for a humane society that ran animal control for a county of about 200,000 folks, and we hired a new dispatcher whose resume mentioned her computer experience. Great! I thought. I’ll just train her on our persnickety database, and we’ll be good to go.
I did train her on the database, using the five-page manual I’d created for it (the documentation provided by the vendor was…less than stellar). But before I trained her on the database, it turned out that I had to train her on a computer mouse. Specifically, she didn’t know what it was or how to use it. Her “computer experience” amounted to having run a cash register.
I succeeded, eventually, in teaching her how to use the mouse to move the cursor. I failed to teach her that she didn’t have to groan like a constipated raccoon every time she moved the mouse. Not for lack of trying.
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### Author:  [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2021, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/106 "2021-05-13T21:03:15Z")
> [@madmonk28](#):
>
> And why am I writing in cursive like Ben Franklin?
My kids say “Nana sent me a card in code again. Can you read it for me?” Of course, Nana gets out her old fountain pen and it does indeed look like 1776…
..
> [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#):
>
> …turned out that I had to train her on a computer mouse.
I had a Beginning Computer Graphics student lift her mouse straight up, keeping it level, while she wondered why her cursor wasn’t moving upwards.
I hadn’t realized before how we all make that 90º turn in our minds automatically… “UP on screen equals AWAY from me!”
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### Author:  [@BippityBoppityBoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BippityBoppityBoo)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2021, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/107 "2021-05-13T21:15:06Z")
> [@Lancia](#):
>
> The example I used was a 17yo girl who did knot know how address an envelope for mailing, where to put the stamp, or how to write a return address.
>
> One of my fellow teachers then said that he didn’t know that either.
My 32+yo roommate, who is quite sharp albeit not book smart, doesn’t know how to write a check or a bank deposit or withdrawal slip. She blames it on being educated in Arkansas.
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### Author:  [@D\_Anconia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/D_Anconia)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2021, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/108 "2021-05-13T21:39:59Z")
> [@digs](#):
>
> Last time I did this (a year ago?) I narrated it to myself in a flabbergasted tone, as if to say “WHY am I finding a tiny sticker with a denomination on it, and LICKING it?”
Why would you lick a self-adhesive stamp?
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### Author:  [@thorny\_locust](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thorny_locust)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2021, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/109 "2021-05-13T21:40:26Z")
> [@Max\_S](#):
>
> It turns out a substantial minority of people have no idea what a smartphone is or whether their phone has apps. I knew this would be a problem with very old patients, but it turns people as young as 60 don’t know if they have a smartphone.
Some of them are confusing. My phone has a browser and can do email; but it doesn’t do apps. Is that a smart phone or isn’t it?
– I have had to explain to farm interns that yes, there is such a thing as poisonous plants. And not only are there plants that are poisonous to humans if you eat them, there are plants that can cause you problems even if all you did was touch them.
(They had apparently never even heard of poison ivy.)
There are however very likely things in their lives that they assume everyone knows about which I have no clue.
> [@The\_wind\_of\_my\_soul](#):
>
> Manually adding up numbers in an Excel spreadsheet: I never learned how to use formulas in Excel. When it comes time to add up numbers, I can either (a) Use a calculator, or (b) Learn how to use formulas in Excel. In the heat of the moment, it always seems like more effort to learn something new than it does to just whip out my calculator.
This.
I just hate spreadsheets. I don’t want to have to type things into box X in order to have them show up in box Y. I don’t want to have to figure out which of the three thousand things they can probably do is best done by picking which of forty-seven supposedly intuitive symbols none of which mean anything to me. Much easier to use the calculator.
Depends how much time one spends doing things now ordinarily done on spreadsheets, of course. If I had to do a lot of it, I suppose I’d have to learn to use the things.
> [@Jasmine](#):
>
> The worst:
>
> I got a call one day from a teacher we’ll call, “Patti”. She said her computer wasn’t running at all. So, I went down to her room.
>
> Jasmine (after a cursory inspection): “Ah, Patti, it’s not plugged in.”
>
> Patti: “Oh, I don’t know computer stuff.”
To be fair: there are lots of people, at any given moment, who are using computers that aren’t plugged in.
> [@digs](#):
>
> Last time I did this (a year ago?) I narrated it to myself in a flabbergasted tone, as if to say “WHY am I finding a tiny sticker with a denomination on it, and LICKING it?”
If the stamp’s so old you need to lick it, it’s probably for way less money than the actual postage.
They’ve all been self-stick for quite a few years now. (At least in the USA. Don’t know about elsewhere.)
– The envelope flap, you may have to lick. Or maybe not. Some of them are self-stick, too.
> [@digs](#):
>
> I had a Beginning Computer Graphics student lift her mouse straight up, keeping it level, while she wondered why her cursor wasn’t moving upwards.
>
> I hadn’t realized before how we all make that 90º turn in our minds automatically… “UP on screen equals AWAY from me!”
I was utterly confounded once when a new operating system (Mac) decided, for some reason, that default was the other way around.
Turned out you could reset it. But why they thought it was more “natural” to have the default be the other way – when their own previous system didn’t use it – I do not know.
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### Author:  [@Max\_S](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_S)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2021, 11:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/110 "2021-05-13T23:24:23Z")
> [@thorny\_locust](#):
>
> Some of them are confusing. My phone has a browser and can do email; but it doesn’t do apps. Is that a smart phone or isn’t it?
If it lacks both the App Store and Google Play, you can’t do telehealth with our office.
~Max
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### Author:  [@thorny\_locust](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thorny_locust)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2021, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/111 "2021-05-13T23:28:54Z")
Well, yeah; or at least, not on that phone, which is a flip phone with a screen too small to see anything much on anyway.
But is it a smart phone? It’s got a browser. Or is it not a smart phone, because it doesn’t do apps?
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### Author:  [@leswax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/leswax)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2021, 11:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/112 "2021-05-13T23:32:46Z")
> [@jsc1953](#):
>
> If that fails, try dweazil and widdershins.
I’d heard of widdershins but doesal was new to me. [Sunwise - Wikipedia](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sunwise)
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### Author:  [@Max\_S](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_S)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2021, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/113 "2021-05-13T23:39:52Z")
Definitely a smartphone, and definitely one that runs apps… just not Android/iOS apps. A browser is an app, and the defining feature of a smartphone is the presence of an operating system. You may remember that PDA/phone hybrids from the late 90’s (like the Nokia 9210) are smartphones and were marketed as such.
~Max
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### Author:  [@Ranch\_Dip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranch_Dip)
#### Post date: [May 13, 2021, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/114 "2021-05-13T23:57:54Z")
> [@digs](#):
>
> If we had to give my dad immediate directions, left/right did no good. “Turn east now!” was better, or “Tack to starboard!” (ol’ WWII Navy man…)
If I don’t know left / right, I’m sure not going to know East. Or starboard.
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### Author:  [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)
#### Post date: [May 14, 2021, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/115 "2021-05-14T00:02:06Z")
> [@RollOutTheBarrel](#):
>
> When I was in the Air Force, we got a new Airman who didn’t know his left from his right. The first time I told him to turn a knob to the left, I was very surprised to see him point to his right and say “this way?”
When I was a kid, my dad was watering the lawn and he asked me to go to the faucet and turn off the water. I ran over the faucet and yelled “which way is off?” He said “to the right.”
Now, I was old enough at the time to know the difference between right and left. But I looked at the knob on the faucet and saw that if the top of the knob went to the right, the bottom would be going to the left, so I still didn’t know which way to turn it.
I don’t know about the Airman in ROtB’s unit, but the idea that “right” and “left” mean the top of the dial may have been the source of his confusion.
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### Author:  [@Bootb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bootb)
#### Post date: [May 14, 2021, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/116 "2021-05-14T00:04:42Z")
> [@EinsteinsHund](#):
>
> And the many, many people, probably the majority of users, who think that Excel is a program to lay out nice static lists to print out.
I use spreadsheets for certain types of lists, because the table/dividing lines are conveniently already there. If I used Word or an equivalent, I would have to insert a table.
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### Author:  [@vbob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vbob)
#### Post date: [May 14, 2021, 12:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/117 "2021-05-14T00:09:15Z")
…until all the analog clocks are gone.
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### Author:  [@Kzbre5m](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kzbre5m)
#### Post date: [May 14, 2021, 12:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/118 "2021-05-14T00:09:42Z")
I knew an accounting woman from years ago that wrote letters and other documents in Lotus. It was her go to program for accounting, why not everything else?
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### Author:  [@EinsteinsHund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EinsteinsHund)
#### Post date: [May 14, 2021, 12:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/119 "2021-05-14T00:40:22Z")
> [@Kzbre5m](#):
>
> I knew an accounting woman from years ago that wrote letters and other documents in Lotus.
The first company I worked for after college had a company wide policy to write every text document in fucking Page Maker. No, that’s not a word processor, and it was a pain in the ass and a nightmare. And it wasn’t a publishing house or a newspaper, but a technology company. Madness.
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### Author:  [@HelenGawn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HelenGawn)
#### Post date: [May 14, 2021, 12:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/120 "2021-05-14T00:46:47Z")
When giving directions, my mother used to look at her hand for the wedding ring. No idea what she did before she got married.
Mom was left-handed and was “changed” in grade school. As a southpaw myself I find this barbaric. She found her way around just fine, but the smart ones learned to just follow and not ask questions.
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