# Things you've been surprised you've had to explain at work
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion
**Created:** [May 13, 2021, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959 "2021-05-13T02:42:26Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 9
### Author:  [@TRC4941](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TRC4941)
#### Post date: [May 14, 2021, 1:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/161 "2021-05-14T13:51:19Z")
I’m an office manager at a commercial cleaning company. One of my many duties is payroll. When I mail out the payroll checks (or stubs for direct deposit) I include a brightly colored sticker on the stub that alerts the employees as to the date and day they need to mail in their next time cards. (The timing never changes, the next time cards should be mailed the day they receive their check.) I also enclose a self-addressed, stamped envelope. All they have to do is insert the time card into the envelope, seal it and put it in a mail box. You can not even imagine how many times EVERY pay period that I have to call and beg for some of the employees to submit their time cards. I assume that they know that they won’t get paid unless I have their time card, but I don’t think I can assume that! The object of a job is to get paid, but time after time I’m calling around looking for time cards before I can process payroll. I’ve tried to be tough about it and not call for the missing time cards to show them that they’re not going to get paid if they don’t send in their time cards. That always backfires because then they call and threaten not to come in unless they get paid. Then I end up having to process a check anyway. It drives me right up the wall. It’s very simple: Time card = check.
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### Author:  [@Saintly\_Loser](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Saintly_Loser)
#### Post date: [May 14, 2021, 2:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/162 "2021-05-14T14:04:21Z")
> [@TRC4941](#):
>
> One of my many duties is payroll.
I’ve been there, same kind of thing. In the distant past, though, back when mailing in time cards and stickers and stuff were more mainstream.
> [@TRC4941](#):
>
> I’ve tried to be tough about it and not call for the missing time cards to show them that they’re not going to get paid if they don’t send in their time cards. That always backfires because then they call and threaten not to come in unless they get paid.
There’s your problem right there. They know the threats are empty, and that you’ll cave to _their_ threats.
Back in that distant past I mentioned above, in a similar situation, we bit the bullet and fired a few non-compliers. It was pretty disruptive to the company for a couple of weeks. After that, we didn’t have any more problems.
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### Author:  [@The\_wind\_of\_my\_soul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_wind_of_my_soul)
#### Post date: [May 14, 2021, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/163 "2021-05-14T14:07:16Z")
**TRC4941** What exactly happens on the backend between when someone submits a timecard and when they get paid? I know that after I submit my timecard, payroll needs to do something with it. But from my vantage point, I submit my timecard, and then I get money in my account. Obviously, the act of hitting submit does not automatically trigger a deposit into my bank account, but that’s how it seems from my end!
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### Author:  [@SCAdian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SCAdian)
#### Post date: [May 14, 2021, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/164 "2021-05-14T15:30:35Z")
> [@The\_wind\_of\_my\_soul](#):
>
> The left-to-right thing: this confuses the hell out of me. I know the difference between left and right, that never confuses me. But saying to turn something to the right does. If you are turning a knob to the right, then the top of the knob goes from left to right, but the bottom of the knob is actually going from right to left. If you place your hand on something and turn it to the right, your fingers are going left to right, but your palm is going right to left. So that righty-tighty, left-loosy thing has never helped me much. Clockwise and counter-clockwise is a much easier point of reference for me.
Over think things much?
[ ](https://previews.123rf.com/images/weedezign/weedezign1503/weedezign150300394/37886477-hand-opening-door-knob-white-door-.jpg)
Can this guy see the bottom of the knob, and which way it’s turning? No – his hand’s in the way. Can he see the palm of his hand? No – the rest of his hand’s in the way. So if he can’t see them, why should he care which direction they’re moving? He _can_ see the back of his hand and the top of the knob, so he moves them in the proper direction.
The same presumably applies to you and your doorknob. Move the part you can see, and don’t worry about what you can’t see.
> [@kayaker](#):
>
> She holds her hands up, so that she is looking at the backs of her hands. Her left hand-thumb form an “L”, so she then knows that is her left.
Once lived with a girl who had left-right problems. She’d look at her hand and say, “This is the hand I _write_ with, so it’s my _right_ hand.”
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### Author:  [@Kron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kron)
#### Post date: [May 14, 2021, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/165 "2021-05-14T16:24:24Z")
> [@SCAdian](#):
>
> Once lived with a girl who had left-right problems. She’d look at her hand and say, “This is the hand I _write_ with, so it’s my _right_ hand.”
“…but of course, she was left-handed, which just added another layer of confusion.” 😛
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### Author:  [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)
#### Post date: [May 14, 2021, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/166 "2021-05-14T17:02:33Z")
I once had to create a large poster from art work I had done in Illustrator. The guy at Kinko’s told me an enlargement that size would look like shit, because it would be all pixelated. I explained to him that this was done in vectors, and it could be enlarged to the size of the Crab Nebula without being pixelated. He didn’t believe me, but printed it anyway. He was amazed at the results.
I’ve also had people not understanding aspect ratio. “I love this photo of the Eiffel Tower, but I need a landscape version.”
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### Author:  [@Bonum\_Legatum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bonum_Legatum)
#### Post date: [May 14, 2021, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/167 "2021-05-14T17:26:05Z")
> [@panache45](#):
>
> Back in the '90s, we got several Macs installed at work. One of the owners sat down, put the mouse on the floor, and tried to use it as a foot pedal. And that was not the stupidest thing he ever did.
Thank you for reminding me that there is such a thing - the foot mouse. Now I want one.
[Footmouse - Wikipedia](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Footmouse#:~:text=A%20foot%20controlled%20mouse%20)(also,high%2Dback%20or%20neck%20problems.
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### Author:  [@Limmin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Limmin)
#### Post date: [May 14, 2021, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/168 "2021-05-14T17:29:08Z")
**Left vs. Right-handedness**
I’m currently teaching my teenager to drive, and he, like his mama and grandpa, is a lefty, while I and the majority of the population are righties. There is from time to time a hesitation when I specify a direction L or R but generally he’s adapted to the right-handed world. He is also a gamer, and I marvel at him using his non-dominant hand (right) on the mouse and his left hand on the WASD keys, just like a right-handed player.
This discussion has made me recall a Star Trek novel I read way back in high school, where Spock was, possibly in a transporter accident, split into two Spocks, one was the right-handed original and the other a mirror-image version, who IIRC also had an evil personality. The true Spock was not easily able to convince the other crewmembers that he was the real, original Spock and the other was the impostor. The impostor, on the other hand, had to hide this fact and pretend, among other things, that he was right-handed. Which led to occasional hesitation when doing certain tasks. It was by noticing these hesitations that at last the crew figured out who was who.
**Use of calculators for trivial tasks**
As a teacher of undergraduate engineering students, I sometimes see students using calculators on an exam not because they really need to, but more as a crutch / safety blanket. On the final exam we just had, the most “math” (arithmetic) one would have to do was to multiply 4 x 5, but I allowed calculator use “if it made them feel better.”
**On Printing Computer Graphics**
As @panache45 pointed out, this is not a trivial subject. In my former life / job, I was not directly responsible for generating content to be printed, but sat next door to an office mate who did this day in / day out. Big difference between what looks good onscreen (JPG / GIF / PDF) and graphics to be sent to the printers (typically big TIFF / EPS files). When dealing with marketing departments at partner companies, frequently I was asked to supply “high resolution JPG” files of our company logo. OK…that works…but seems like the worst of all worlds. I gave up trying to get them to accept files optimized for printing OR online use and just sent them “good enough” files, which is probably what they really wanted.
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### Author:  [@Pardel-Lux](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pardel-Lux)
#### Post date: [May 14, 2021, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/169 "2021-05-14T17:41:53Z")
As a conference interpreter, we are usually very grateful to the speakers that give us a printout of the speech they are going to read (much too fast) beforehand. What many very experienced conference attendants seems not to graps is that when they give me a speech in the language I work into I and my booth partner are the only interpreters in the room that don’t need it. When (s)he speakt my language, I remain silent. All the other colleagues would welcome his paper.
So many speakers do not realize who wrks for them and when, and some have been doing this for years.
Usually I take the printout anyway, have copies made and distribute them among the colleagues. It is easier, faster, and makes a better impression.
Well, used to, before confinement and so on separated us.
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### Author:  [@Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eyebrows_0f_Doom)
#### Post date: [May 14, 2021, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/170 "2021-05-14T18:10:55Z")
> [@panache45](#):
>
> I’ve also had people not understanding aspect ratio. “I love this photo of the Eiffel Tower, but I need a landscape version.”
Yup. Said co-worker once turned our HD camcorder on its side to record footage of the Empire State Building “so it would fill the frame.” I could just change it in post, right? 🤦♀️ 🤦♀️
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### Author:  [@Briny\_Deep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Briny_Deep)
#### Post date: [May 14, 2021, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/171 "2021-05-14T18:58:47Z")
> [@solost](#):
>
> > [@Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](#):
> >
> > I had to explain to a co-worker why I couldn’t take the footage he shot in vertical portrait mode and make it fit a widescreen 16:9 image _without_ either adding huge vertical bars on the sides or zooming into the very center.
>
> As a former graphic artist, and now as a web developer, I’ve also had to explain the concept of “aspect ratio” many times over the years. “ No, sorry, I can’t widen the square image to fit that rectangular area and keep it the same height, unless you don’t mind the image being stretched like silly putty”.
Another former graphics guy. I once had to explain to a manager who’d given me a photo of a car (showing the driver’s side) that flopping the photo would not result in an image of the car’s passenger’s side. Painful conversation.
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### Author:  [@Max\_S](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_S)
#### Post date: [May 14, 2021, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/172 "2021-05-14T19:05:53Z")
Did you ever get a request to enhance, as seen in _Blade Runner_ or _CSI_?
~Max
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### Author:  [@Frodo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frodo)
#### Post date: [May 14, 2021, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/173 "2021-05-14T19:11:03Z")
On two occasions I have been asked, 'Pray, Mr. **Babbage** , if you put into the machine **wrong figures** , will the right answers come out? ’ I am not able rightly to apprehend the kind of confusion of ideas that could provoke such a question.
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### Author:  [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)
#### Post date: [May 14, 2021, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/174 "2021-05-14T19:32:09Z")
I was _this close_ to posting this exact quote in response to some of the comments recorded in this thread,
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### Author:  [@Hari\_Seldon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hari_Seldon)
#### Post date: [May 14, 2021, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/175 "2021-05-14T19:32:47Z")
> [@Pheoinix](#):
>
> I now know such borders exist, but still aren’t sure of the logistics for vehicles crossing them.
Sweden used to have left hand driving, but they switched in the mid 60s. I knew a Norwegian who was from a town (called Kirkenes) in the far NE of Norway. When he was a student in Oslo, the road to his family home snaked in and out of Sweden and the border wasn’t marked. He described driving home late one night down the middle of the narrow road and seeing a headlight coming towards him and not knowing which way to swerve.
I have a colleague who claims that he sometimes gets plus and minus mixed up because they changed him from left to right when he was a child. He is a research mathematician with many publications and a couple books.
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### Author:  [@Frodo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frodo)
#### Post date: [May 14, 2021, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/176 "2021-05-14T19:33:17Z")
It shows that that kind of users have been with us before computers even existed.
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### Author:  [@Saint\_Cad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Saint_Cad)
#### Post date: [May 14, 2021, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/177 "2021-05-14T19:40:37Z")
> [@TriPolar](#):
>
> What is your objective method of determining which side is port or starboard?
Port is the side with [W. S. Gilbert quartered on it](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f68VXKMZT1Q).
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### Author:  [@dorvann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dorvann)
#### Post date: [May 14, 2021, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/178 "2021-05-14T22:02:01Z")
My sister had to explain that to a nursing aid at the nursing home she worked at. The residents are not going anywhere so someone has to be there.
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### Author:  [@thorny\_locust](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thorny_locust)
#### Post date: [May 15, 2021, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/179 "2021-05-15T01:21:32Z")
I once had to explain that yes, farmers work on weekends.
To be fair, the person I was explaining this to was about 14.
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### Author:  [@ZosterSandstorm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZosterSandstorm)
#### Post date: [May 15, 2021, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/things-youve-been-surprised-youve-had-to-explain-at-work/941959/180 "2021-05-15T03:15:12Z")
> [@Northern\_Piper](#):
>
> The structure of a boat is external to your body. That’s what I’m meaning by objective. Your body structure is subjective to you and your brain. That’s where the difficulty appears to arise, as far as I can tell from reading about it. (IANAPsych).
You can perceive a boat through your eyes just as much as you can perceive the position of your left hand through proprioception. They are both physical objects with an objective position in the real world that may be perceived differently by different people depending on psychological factors.
Which is to say … there is no way to define “starboard” other than “the side of the boat that is on the right for a person aboard the boat facing the bow” and the notion that port/starboard are somehow more objective or explainable than left/right makes no sense, at least as explained thusfar in this thread.
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