# Think about this, you pro-life IDIOTS! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 24, 2000, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/think-about-this-you-pro-life-idiots/5659 "2000-03-24T19:05:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Rysdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7cd45c/32.png) [@Rysdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysdad)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2000, 3:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/think-about-this-you-pro-life-idiots/5659/81 "2000-03-27T03:54:00Z")
Remember that Goober Jelly stuff–that mixture of peanut butter and grape jelly in one jar? Well, for all you pie lovers, there’s new taste treat: Placenta Peach. ---
**Author:** ![foolsguinea](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foolsguinea/32/14751_2.png) [@foolsguinea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/foolsguinea)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2000, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/think-about-this-you-pro-life-idiots/5659/82 "2000-03-27T04:36:00Z")
CHERRY Pie. CHERRY. [Well, Lemon Meringue is good, too–and Mincemeat is good, but not an every day pie.] Cherry is the thing. Of. Course. ---
**Author:** ![Weirddave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/919ad9/32.png) [@Weirddave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weirddave)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2000, 6:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/think-about-this-you-pro-life-idiots/5659/83 "2000-03-27T06:03:00Z")
> [@](#): > > PI ARE SQUARE Sorry, little buddy, here in the good ole, God fearing U S of A PIE ARE ROUND. Pervert! * * * Cecil said it. I believe it. That settles it. ---
**Author:** ![KarmaComa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e36b37/32.png) [@KarmaComa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KarmaComa)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2000, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/think-about-this-you-pro-life-idiots/5659/84 "2000-03-27T17:39:00Z")
This is the dumbest thread I have ever seen, except that dumb thread in my shirt that keeps on coming out. ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2000, 6:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/think-about-this-you-pro-life-idiots/5659/85 "2000-03-28T06:33:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by **SingleDad** : > > Two scoops of ice cream, two scoops of dead baby and some root beer. [http://www.beginbids.com/ubb/smilies/icon25.gif](http://www.beginbids.com/ubb/smilies/icon25.gif) [http://www.beginbids.com/ubb/smilies/icon25.gif](http://www.beginbids.com/ubb/smilies/icon25.gif) [http://www.beginbids.com/ubb/smilies/icon25.gif](http://www.beginbids.com/ubb/smilies/icon25.gif) [http://www.beginbids.com/ubb/smilies/icon25.gif](http://www.beginbids.com/ubb/smilies/icon25.gif) [http://www.beginbids.com/ubb/smilies/icon25.gif](http://www.beginbids.com/ubb/smilies/icon25.gif) You are just **WRONG!** [http://www.beginbids.com/ubb/smilies/icon25.gif](http://www.beginbids.com/ubb/smilies/icon25.gif) [http://www.beginbids.com/ubb/smilies/icon25.gif](http://www.beginbids.com/ubb/smilies/icon25.gif) [http://www.beginbids.com/ubb/smilies/icon25.gif](http://www.beginbids.com/ubb/smilies/icon25.gif) [http://www.beginbids.com/ubb/smilies/icon25.gif](http://www.beginbids.com/ubb/smilies/icon25.gif) [http://www.beginbids.com/ubb/smilies/icon25.gif](http://www.beginbids.com/ubb/smilies/icon25.gif) Esprix, whose co-workers are now wondering why iced tea just came flying out of his nose like that… * * * [Ask the Gay Guy!](http://boards.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum7/HTML/001376.html) ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2000, 6:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/think-about-this-you-pro-life-idiots/5659/86 "2000-03-28T06:35:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by **KarmaComa** : > > This is the dumbest thread I have ever seen, except that dumb thread in my shirt that keeps on coming out. Send it to a nice support group, and above all, be supportive of its choice of pies! Esprix * * * [Ask the Gay Guy!](http://boards.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum7/HTML/001376.html) ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2000, 6:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/think-about-this-you-pro-life-idiots/5659/87 "2000-03-28T06:39:00Z")
Listen up, you anti-pie, baby-hating bigots, I have _had it_ with your so-called “sensitivity” to those whose pie orientations differ from yours! Why on earth would you _choose_ to like lemon merangue when there was a whole world of chocolate mousse out there? I mean, come on! Think, people! And that’s not even the issue at hand - there was a time when one could not even _eat_ the pie of ones choosing in the privacy of ones own home! What is wrong with this country where peaceful, honest people can’t even use _whipped toppings_ without interference from big government, religion, and Dr. Laura? I say, keep your laws out of my kitchen! And off my stove! Or oven! You know what I mean! _ **REBOLUTION!** _ Esprix, who is _still_ wondering, “Won’t someone please think of the children?!?!” * * * [Ask the Gay Guy!](http://boards.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum7/HTML/001376.html) ---
**Author:** ![WallyM7](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b5e925/32.png) [@WallyM7](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WallyM7)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2000, 6:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/think-about-this-you-pro-life-idiots/5659/88 "2000-03-28T06:43:00Z")
> [@](#): > > [Well, Lemon Meringue is good, too Write this down: Lemon Meringue Pie has no inherent qualities save for comedic slapstick effects. We’ve got a serious discussion going here, and resent this kind of sillification. It serves only to cheapen our efforts. * * * ---
**Author:** ![Diane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/2acd7d/32.png) [@Diane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diane)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2000, 6:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/think-about-this-you-pro-life-idiots/5659/89 "2000-03-28T06:58:00Z")
You disgusting, evil pie eaters! I hope you all rot in the stinky pits of hell! ARG - Just stick with cherry cheese cake (yum) and Jesus will welcome you home with open arms. * * * Pardon me while I burst into flames. ---
**Author:** ![Minxsmom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d07c76/32.png) [@Minxsmom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Minxsmom)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2000, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/think-about-this-you-pro-life-idiots/5659/90 "2000-03-27T19:02:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by Esprix: > \*\*Listen up, you anti-pie, baby-hating bigots, I have _had it_ with your so-called “sensitivity” to those whose pie orientations differ from yours! Why on earth would you _choose_ to like lemon merangue when there was a whole world of chocolate mousse out there? I mean, come on! Think, people! > \*\* Gee, Esprix, that’s a far cry from what you said to me on page 1. And, I quote: > [@](#): > > \*\*I take exception to your sanctimonious tone! It is not enough to “tolerate” apple pie lovers - you must celebrate that love! \*\* So, which is it Esprix? Do you embrace apple pie lovers or dispise them? Do you accept and ‘celebrate’ others for their differences, or are you a closet piephobic? Are you an apple lover or a chocolate lover? You’re waffling and that cannot be tolerated when discussing a subject as sensitive as this. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2000, 7:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/think-about-this-you-pro-life-idiots/5659/91 "2000-03-27T19:17:00Z")
Agisofia—I don’t think anyone on this board seriously advocates “killing children!” Now, aborting fetuses, on the other hand, I don’t have any problem with. And cheese on pies? Urgh! Reason totters on its throne! ---
**Author:** ![quadell](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/b9bd4f/32.png) [@quadell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/quadell)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2000, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/think-about-this-you-pro-life-idiots/5659/92 "2000-03-27T19:45:00Z")
In Libertaria, you can eat any kind of pie you want! So long as your pie doesn’t violate the One Law Of Libertaria. - Libertarian (or an impersonator thereof) ---
**Author:** ![quadell](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/b9bd4f/32.png) [@quadell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/quadell)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2000, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/think-about-this-you-pro-life-idiots/5659/93 "2000-03-27T19:50:00Z")
I think we need a constitutional amendment against Apple Pie burning! For those of us who love Apple Pie, it is an insensitive and offensive act to burn one. Your Quadell, unfortunately taking it even farther. ---
**Author:** ![Narile](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/71c47a/32.png) [@Narile](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Narile)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2000, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/think-about-this-you-pro-life-idiots/5659/94 "2000-03-27T21:02:00Z")
TV did preach thusly: > [@](#): > > Evil, pure evil…apple pie with _ice cream_? Apple pie is eaten only with a wedge > of good Cheddar alongside. And the apples should snuggle with good Cognac > and nutmeg; cinnamon is much too harsh. Ah, another follower of the true path of apple pies! Though you forgot that the cheese must be sharp…none of that mild stuff. Ice Cream does have its place…with Apple Crisp, not Apple Pie. —Goes to make his homemade vanila mint pudding pie. (The proper use of Thin Mint cookies, crumbcrust for a pudding pie.) * * * \>\>Being Chaotic Evil means never having to say your sorry…unless the other guy is bigger than you.\<\< —The dragon observes ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2000, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/think-about-this-you-pro-life-idiots/5659/95 "2000-03-27T21:28:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by **Minxsmom** : > > So, which is it Esprix? Do you embrace apple pie lovers or dispise them? Do you accept and ‘celebrate’ others for their differences, or are you a closet piephobic? Are you an apple lover or a chocolate lover? You’re waffling and that cannot be tolerated when discussing a subject as sensitive as this. Uh… uh… uh… {tugging at collar} **GET THEE BEHIND ME, SATAN!** Your bewitching ways will not confuse those of us who follow The Truth Path of Inherently Correct Piedom! Esprix * * * [Ask the Gay Guy!](http://boards.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum7/HTML/001376.html) ---
**Author:** ![Crystalguy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dbc845/32.png) [@Crystalguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crystalguy)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2000, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/think-about-this-you-pro-life-idiots/5659/96 "2000-03-28T00:13:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by Billdo: > **I just have one thing to say to you all … Key Lime!** I didn’t forget Key Lime Pie but it is so rarely that I feel worthy to worship in the inner sanctum of Pie that I feared to mention its Hallowed Name among the profane. I pray that Key Lime Pie will accept me as an acolyte and deem me worthy to worship on a regular basis. Key Lime Pie is all forgiving and all loving but is not a Pie for the profane who approach it with the idea of “eating a piece of pie.” All Hail Key Lime Pie!!! Fail at your peril! * * * Crystalguy ---
**Author:** ![Billdo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/billdo/32/315_2.png) [@Billdo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Billdo)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2000, 12:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/think-about-this-you-pro-life-idiots/5659/97 "2000-03-28T00:36:00Z")
AMEN, Brother. Let all of the other common pies fall before the majesty of the **Key Lime** (Hallowed be its name). The gentle smoothness, the smooth sharpness, the sharp gentleness. Have them worship their false pies. But they will come to know, in the fullness of time, the majesty of the **Key Lime** (Hallowed be its name). Peace and citrus. ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2000, 2:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/think-about-this-you-pro-life-idiots/5659/98 "2000-03-28T14:27:00Z")
I’m a key lime virgin, I’m afraid ---
**Author:** ![Minxsmom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d07c76/32.png) [@Minxsmom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Minxsmom)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2000, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/think-about-this-you-pro-life-idiots/5659/99 "2000-03-28T17:05:00Z")
Orangecakes, it’s just my opinion, but you might want to stay a key lime pie virgin. Unless, you can go to Florida and get one made with REAL key limes. After you have one of those, you begin to wonder what crap the rest of the world has been feeding you under the ‘key lime’ moniker. ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Bean](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_bean/32/1760_2.png) [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2000, 6:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/think-about-this-you-pro-life-idiots/5659/100 "2000-03-30T06:14:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by Valerieblaise: > \*\* > So, does anyone have a good recipe for toddler? I usually like mine rare. > \*\* Certainly, my dear. I suggest a classic oven-roasted toddler with rosemary. First of all, you should go to a butcher shop that allows you to pick your toddler live. Choose one that seems sedentary–more tender. Make sure the butcher gives you the giblets in case you want to make gravy. Stuff the toddler with a classic bread stuffing. Joy of Cannnibalism has some excellent stuffing recipes. Use cotton string to tie the wrists and ankles together to make a compact package that fits in the oven. Rub the skin generously with olive oil, crushed garlic, and rosemary (use fresh if you have it, but dried will do). Place toddler on a rack in a roasting pan, and roast at 350 for about 15 minutes per pound. A meat thermometer is helpful in assessing done-ness. If you like it rare, I recommend an interior temperature of 140 degrees. Let the toddler rest for 20 minutes or so before carving. The average toddler should feed more than a dozen people–with leftovers! Yum! Toddler sandwiches for lunch! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/think-about-this-you-pro-life-idiots/5659.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/think-about-this-you-pro-life-idiots/5659.md?page=6)