# This is better than sex!
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-better-than-sex/230064
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion
**Created:** [February 19, 2004, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-better-than-sex/230064 "2004-02-19T20:18:11Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@NotWithoutRage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NotWithoutRage)
#### Post date: [February 19, 2004, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-better-than-sex/230064/1 "2004-02-19T20:18:11Z")
Okay, so I’ve heard people say, for example, “This chocolate is better than sex,” or “Shopping: much better than sex!”
So, fill in the blank. “\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_ is better than sex.”
**Mine:** “Watching _As Good As It Gets_ for the millionth time, much, much better than sex.”
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### Author:  [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)
#### Post date: [February 19, 2004, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-better-than-sex/230064/2 "2004-02-19T20:33:50Z")
Scalp massage, definitely. It’s cleaner and faster too!
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### Author:  [@John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Carter_of_Mars)
#### Post date: [February 19, 2004, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-better-than-sex/230064/3 "2004-02-19T20:44:04Z")
Um, err, geez, let me think, let’s see…I’ll just have to get back to you on this one.
😃
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### Author:  [@C3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/C3)
#### Post date: [February 19, 2004, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-better-than-sex/230064/4 "2004-02-19T20:48:01Z")
BETTER THAN SEX CAKE
1-Duncan Hines yellow cake mix
1-box instant vanilla pudding (small box)
4-eggs
½-cup oil
½-cup water
8-ounce sour cream
1-bag of chocolate chips (6 ½ ounce)
1-German chocolate bar – grated
Heat oven to 350 degrees.
In a medium size-mixing bowl, mix cake mix, vanilla pudding, eggs, oil, water, and sour cream. Fold in the chocolate chips and grated German chocolate bar. Pour batter into a greased and floured bundt pan.
Bake for 55 minutes; checking with a cake tester after 50 minutes.
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### Author:  [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)
#### Post date: [February 19, 2004, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-better-than-sex/230064/5 "2004-02-19T20:50:37Z")
I feel like it would be so…I dunno…RIGHT… to have sex IN C3’s cake batter!
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### Author:  [@OneYogini](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneYogini)
#### Post date: [February 19, 2004, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-better-than-sex/230064/6 "2004-02-19T20:57:43Z")
…HA!!..HA I say…NOTHING, NOTHING, NOTHING is better than sex…or maybe nothing seems like it would be better than sex right now because I haven’t been getting it from the BF for a while because of the erectile dysfunction issues he’s having for OVER A YEAR NOW AND WON’T GET HELP FOR IT BECAUSE HE THINKS IT WILL EMBARASS ME TO SEE “OUR” DOCTOR…and I’m about to go out of my mind…and…sorry…was that OUTLOUD!!! I ADMIT IT, I’M A NYMPHO…I’d be willing to get help for THAT if anyone had a problem with it. It’s just that no one has ever said they have a problem with it…but now I have a problem with it because it’s conflicting with his issues…am I still posting??? :rolleyes:
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### Author:  [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)
#### Post date: [February 19, 2004, 10:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-better-than-sex/230064/7 "2004-02-19T22:09:54Z")
Anal sex?
(hetero style that is)
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### Author:  [@Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tim_T-Bonham.net)
#### Post date: [February 19, 2004, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-better-than-sex/230064/8 "2004-02-19T23:14:38Z")
> [@NotWithoutRage](#):
>
> Okay, so I’ve heard people say, for example, “This chocolate is better than sex,” or “Shopping: much better than sex!”
Frankly, I’ve always thought that people who said this just weren’t much good at sex. And wondered why they would proclaim that publicly.
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### Author:  [@statheist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/statheist)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2004, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-better-than-sex/230064/9 "2004-02-20T00:52:11Z")
I’ve never experienced either of these, but I’ve had friends claim both surfing a perfect wave and skydiving (free fall, I believe) are better than sex.
My wife also makes a casserole she calls BTS Casserole (when the kids are around) that involves potatoes, cheese, and I think cornflakes. It’s good but not BTS!
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### Author:  [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2004, 6:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-better-than-sex/230064/10 "2004-02-20T06:08:33Z")
> [@NotWithoutRage](#):
>
> Okay, so I’ve heard people say, for example, “This chocolate is better than sex,” or “Shopping: much better than sex!”
>
> So, fill in the blank. “\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_ is better than sex.”
More Sex?
Sex with another person?
Sex _with_ chocolate?
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### Author:  [@Thaumaturge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thaumaturge)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2004, 7:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-better-than-sex/230064/11 "2004-02-20T07:07:38Z")
peace of mind
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### Author:  [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2004, 8:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-better-than-sex/230064/12 "2004-02-20T08:18:10Z")
> [@Kalhoun](#):
>
> I feel like it would be so…I dunno…RIGHT… to have sex IN C3’s cake batter!
I’m up for it if you are. 😉
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### Author:  [@Nathan\_S](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nathan_S)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2004, 8:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-better-than-sex/230064/13 "2004-02-20T08:41:10Z")
Sex? Hey, I used to know what that was. Or at least I think I did. It was just too damn long ago …
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### Author:  [@zephyrine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zephyrine)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2004, 11:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-better-than-sex/230064/14 "2004-02-20T11:04:41Z")
Not better than sex, but quite often as good as:
**BOOTS!**
They do it for me every damn time. They make me feel good, they’re just the right size and length, they can go on for just as long as I want them to, and they’re gorgeous.
They just lack pillow talk.
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### Author:  [@Typo\_Negative](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Negative)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2004, 11:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-better-than-sex/230064/15 "2004-02-20T11:16:11Z")
Seeing as how sex is impossible without breathing, I’m gonna say air.
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### Author:  [@Marlitharn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marlitharn)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2004, 12:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-better-than-sex/230064/16 "2004-02-20T12:11:39Z")
Sleep. A full 8 hours of glorious deep dreamless sleep, in a big warm bed with big soft pillows and nice toasty blankets…sigh.
I miss sleep.
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### Author:  [@yojimbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yojimbo)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2004, 12:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-better-than-sex/230064/17 "2004-02-20T12:15:13Z")
[Clinton] Blowjobs are better than sex[/Clinton]
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### Author:  [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2004, 12:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-better-than-sex/230064/18 "2004-02-20T12:26:07Z")
> [@t-bonham@scc.net](#):
>
> Frankly, I’ve always thought that people who said this just weren’t much good at sex. And wondered why they would proclaim that publicly.
My thought exactly. “They must not be doing it right.”
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### Author:  [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2004, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-better-than-sex/230064/19 "2004-02-20T13:20:35Z")
> [@dutchboy208](#):
>
> I’m up for it if you are. 😉
Ah DO believe You’re flirtin’ with me, Dutchboy!
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### Author:  [@pipper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pipper)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2004, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-better-than-sex/230064/20 "2004-02-20T14:28:17Z")
Maybe not better, but certainly on par:
Being stuck somewhere where you can’t pee for a long time and then finally getting that shuddering release.
And I’m not talking just, “Oh the movie’s almost over and I’m gonna hold it another 10 minutes,” hafta pee. I mean a “Holy shit, I shoulda gone before I left work and why did this train break down for 45 minutes and dammit if only there was a Big Gulp cup in the car I’d use it and man if I even SLIGHTLY fumble the keys going in the front door I’m gonna have wet pants” hafta pee.
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