# This is scarier than I thought--Please read **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 27, 2000, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-scarier-than-i-thought-please-read/23733 "2000-06-27T16:00:04Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Ayesha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c0e974/32.png) [@Ayesha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ayesha)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2000, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-scarier-than-i-thought-please-read/23733/21 "2000-06-27T22:39:16Z")
Some fools never learn, do they Troll3 ? Who wants to bet on how long it takes Alpha and/or Lynn to kill it this time, I say less than 10 minutes. ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2000, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-scarier-than-i-thought-please-read/23733/22 "2000-06-28T00:11:05Z")
Suasponte, thanks for the update from a REAL lawyer. You are one, aren’t you? You’re not just some law school dropout? What the hell, that’s still more credentials than I have. But what is a sponte, and why would you want to su(e) it? ---
**Author:** ![24KaratGold](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/2/cc9497/32.png) [@24KaratGold](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/24KaratGold)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2000, 12:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-scarier-than-i-thought-please-read/23733/23 "2000-06-28T00:59:29Z")
This issue was discussed also over on Opal’s board, with a discussion of a case somebody filed in California. Nobody’s posted to that thread recently, though, to tell us what’s been going on with it. [http://fff.fathom.org/ubb/Forum1/HTML/000098.html](http://fff.fathom.org/ubb/Forum1/HTML/000098.html) Goldie Gentlemen _do_ prefer blondes, and rightly so! ---
**Author:** ![Unauthorized\_Cinnamon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/bc8723/32.png) [@Unauthorized\_Cinnamon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unauthorized_Cinnamon)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2000, 1:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-scarier-than-i-thought-please-read/23733/24 "2000-06-28T01:39:03Z")
> [@](#): > > And if you did say something like that, Her Mighty Hoof would crush you like an errant bit of unholy clover before there was ever any real danger of action. > > She will not be mocked. May Her hooves never be shod I meant no disrespect. I merely thought it would be most inoffensive if I used my own religion as the example. I would never suggest violence against my fellow worshippers of the IPU (pbuh). > [@](#): > > Suasponte, thanks for the update from a REAL lawyer. You are one, aren’t you? You’re not just some law school dropout? What the hell, that’s still more credentials than I have. [eddie murphy]Hey hey hey, hey HEY hey hey[/eddie murphy]. Just because my certificate is from the North Carolina Bar doesn’t mean I’m not a real lawyer! And unchain that camel from that lamp post!! ---
**Author:** ![Majormd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b3f665/32.png) [@Majormd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Majormd)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2000, 4:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-scarier-than-i-thought-please-read/23733/25 "2000-06-28T04:18:12Z")
> [@](#): > > We already had a poster here threatening to sue us and some other poor young girl for what she thought was libelous to her. She was banned but constantly returns under her husbands name. Most of us thought she was a bigger person than that. We were wrong. > > HUGS! > Sqrl Gee, Sqrl, your ability to break down stereotypes like gays being sensitive and empathetic never ceases to amaze me. Thanks for illustrating so eloquently that one need not be a homophobe to consider you petty-minded and mean-spirited. I’ll pass on the hugs, thanks. ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2000, 4:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-scarier-than-i-thought-please-read/23733/26 "2000-06-28T04:25:16Z")
AerynSun – My deepest and most profound apologies! I had no idea you were also a member of the bar. Of course North Carolina counts! (If that doesn’t get this moved over to MPSIMS, nothing will.) ---
**Author:** ![ponch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/bcef8e/32.png) [@ponch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ponch)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2000, 12:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-scarier-than-i-thought-please-read/23733/27 "2000-06-28T12:52:26Z")
It’s not a fucking newbie/reg battle, relax. It’s about accountability. Reality is that all age groups of all levels of maturity post in theis here place, and some young impressionable wacko is more than likely to listen to an “elder” than a newbie. That’s all. “Hey, this cat posts a lot and always gets a reaction, he/she must be cool, I’ll listen and suck up” ---
**Author:** ![SaxFace](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/13edae/32.png) [@SaxFace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SaxFace)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2000, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-scarier-than-i-thought-please-read/23733/28 "2000-06-28T14:12:29Z")
Sqrl, I’m behind your statement 100% and I know a lot of other posters are as well. This is just to give you some support before the onslaught of flames from people who swore they would never post here again, buddy. I don’t think it’s good etiquette to use a beloved man’s passing for one’s own benefit or as an excuse to post on a forbidden board. To me it’s just another example of putting the mods in a tough situation - pathetic. ---
**Author:** ![Drain\_Bead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47774/32.png) [@Drain\_Bead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drain_Bead)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2000, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-scarier-than-i-thought-please-read/23733/29 "2000-06-28T14:55:01Z")
And I don’t think it’s good etiquette to disallow someone to post heartfelt sympathy and pain to the loved one’s family just because of some completely unrelated stuff that happened six months ago. You know, Melanie, sometimes things happen that allow people to transcend the bullshit. I remember when this whole thing happened, the one thing Wally wanted was for everything to be resolved and everyone to get along again. If there was one thing that came of Wally’s otherwise completely pointless death, it was that for just a few moments, everyone did. That’s not “putting the mods in a tough situation.” That’s human empathy, and it’s much less “pathetic” than NOT allowing it. Posting in that thread was everyone’s way of coming together and dealing with Wally’s death. I’m glad to see that the mods allowed Melin to post, because she was a part of this community, loved Wally, and is loved by quite a few people, and we all NEEDED to share our pain. I think allowing her to post without comment showed a modicum of class on the part of the moderators that you two seem to be sorely lacking right now. ---
**Author:** ![OpalCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8edcca/32.png) [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2000, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-scarier-than-i-thought-please-read/23733/30 "2000-06-28T15:11:42Z")
I am appalled that some of you can’t get past the stupid crap. Melin wanted to post her sympathies about the DEATH OF A FRIEND for god’s sake! You would deny her that because there was a spat several months ago? That is just about the most heartless thing I’ve ever heard. It’s almost as bad as the time my mom didn’t let me go to a friend’s funeral in high school because I was grounded. Frankly it makes me sick. ---
**Author:** ![SaxFace](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/13edae/32.png) [@SaxFace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SaxFace)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2000, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-scarier-than-i-thought-please-read/23733/31 "2000-06-28T15:18:45Z")
I don’t disagree that people need to grieve together, Libby, BUT there were Wally tributes in chat, on Opal’s board, on a special page designed by Opal - I’m wondering why Melin _needed_ to post here. With the recent influx of former posters turned SD posters again(Kellibelli, 24 Karat, MajorMD), I suspect another motive. I don’t know for sure, but I doubt Melin asked permission to post using Highlander’s name. If she did, I will apologize profusely and admit I’m an idiot. If she didn’t, she certainly put the mods in a tough situation. Of course they’re not going to say anything when it comes to a sensitive and painful subject! A part of my etiquette is confronting a person who did something wrong or defending people who try to avoid abuse (but get plenty of it). ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2000, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-scarier-than-i-thought-please-read/23733/32 "2000-06-28T15:28:33Z")
OK, OK. Let’s try and be reasonable. Sqrl, can you back that claim up? By this I mean the following. I did see Melin post her concolances in the thread that brought us the tragic news about Wally’s death. She did so under the name Highlander, which is her husbands, just like you said. If that is the only case that she did this (i.e. “Wally”-related, to put it bluntly), I have absolutely no problem with that, and I doubt any reasonable person would. So Sqrl: can you give us some examples of OTHER posts by Highlander that have been written by Melin? If so, YES, that would be a bad thing. FWIW, it appears that MajorMD signed on again just to point out that she beliefs this is false. Is that true? Because that, too, would be bad if Sqrl is right. I think that’s vital to this issue here. Proof, mate, proof. You see that the lack of evidence makes you look rather heartless, so far. There’s a chance to change that. ---
**Author:** ![Satan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Satan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satan)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2000, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-scarier-than-i-thought-please-read/23733/33 "2000-06-28T15:30:10Z")
I am quite disappointed in what SqrlCub and SaxFace said. First of all, I do believe that Melin told the board administration that she was posting under her husband’s ID, and they said this was fine. Second of all, I don’t give a fuck that there were other places for her to go. This is where they fucking met. It would be real EASY for Melin to come back as some other name (Contestant #3, anyone?) and not make it known that she was doing so. She has not. And until now, Melin has NOT posted under her husband’s ID, and the couple of times that she did to grieve, she signed every post as her own. No deception. No games. If you do not understand that this was a special circumstance, then I don’t know what you are paying attention to. Now, I was critical of Melin before. I went on record saying she was wrong with the thing which caused her to get un-Moderatored, and I understood the banning the second time around. In fact, she thought I disliked her for this, and we fought about it, but I believe she knows now that I was disapproving of her actions, not her. She is someone I respect. She made mistakes, she is paying for them. This, however, is not one of them. Not even close. She has not played games here. She has gone out of her way NOT to play games. All this while sock puppets and trolls rain down around us, she has done nothing harmful, and I guarantee had it not been for the death of Wally, she never would have posted as she did. And anyone who is holding a grudge against her under these circumstances has a heart colder than I thought of you, and I am quite saddened. * * * Yer putz, Satan :wally _I HAVE BEEN SMOKE-FREE FOR: Two months, two weeks, five days, 13 hours, 32 minutes and 5 seconds. 3222 cigarettes not smoked, saving $402.82. Life saved: 1 week, 4 days, 4 hours, 30 minutes._ ---
**Author:** ![kellibelli](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e480ec/32.png) [@kellibelli](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kellibelli)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2000, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-scarier-than-i-thought-please-read/23733/34 "2000-06-28T15:57:48Z")
> [@](#): > > With the recent influx of former posters turned SD posters again(Kellibelli, 24 Karat, MajorMD), I suspect another motive. Do you want to know my motive? All you had to do was ask.It truly haunts me that I let a bunch of crap drive me away. I missed out on so much time with Wally. I hate myself for it. I could have been hare by his side all these months, but I wasnt. If anything were to happen to Cheif Scott, or Coldfire, or Satan (shut up Satan!) or a dozen other posters, INCLUDING you SQRL! and I had missed the time I could have spent with them - well, I just cant imagine. When Wally died, I NEEDED to be HERE. This was where Wally was, even though he posted a bit at Fathom. This is where his heart was. I had only planned to post my prayers for him, but then I didnt want to go. I didnt want to leave my friends - again. I wish you could understand. Saxface, life is so desperately short. It is too short to hold grudges, too short to be mad, WAY to short to hold on to feelings that you were ‘wronged’. You could get hit by a bus tomorrow, I could pass in my sleep, or we could fall at work and never recover… I wont miss out on time with my friends because of hurt feelings. Never again. Wally would be so happy that me and Diane are friends now - he cared for us both. He would be glad I came back too. I am sorry you dont feel the same. I would like to thank Ed and the staff of the SDMB for making me feel welcome to come back. It was extremely kind of you, you went above what was necessary, and I am very grateful. I also dont think Melin was trying to be subvertive, and it showed a great amount of class on the part of the mods to not censure her for using Highlanders name. I even hoped in the spirit of the moment that they might reinstate her. Forgiveness brings a special kind of peace. love to all, Kelli ---
**Author:** ![Drain\_Bead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47774/32.png) [@Drain\_Bead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drain_Bead)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2000, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-scarier-than-i-thought-please-read/23733/35 "2000-06-28T16:03:07Z")
Okay, since it’s been called upon, I did a search for all Highlander posts, to see how many of them were by Melin. In [this thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=24834), Melin posted as Highlander to offer some links to support groups and sympathy for Ayesha upon learning of her cousin’s daughter’s suicide. She apologized profusely to the moderators for doing so. The post is still there, so I guess the moderators either didn’t mind or didn’t see. And oh, that’s it. Other than the Wally threads, of course. That’s all I could find. Went all the way back to when Melin was still a moderator, just in case. Let’s see, one post under her husband’s name since the banning (which occurred in late March, AFAIR). And that’s hardly… > [@](#): > > She was banned but constantly returns under her husbands name. …now is it, Sqrl? ---
**Author:** ![Minxsmom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d07c76/32.png) [@Minxsmom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Minxsmom)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2000, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-scarier-than-i-thought-please-read/23733/36 "2000-06-28T16:03:32Z")
Sorry, Sax, I’m going to have to disagree with you. I will bet you cold hard cash that Melin DID get permission, (probably directly from Ed, himself, if I know Melin). I don’t think she put the Mods in any “position” at all. IMHO, what she did was totally appropriate. I don’t need to go into the reasons, as they’ve been covered quite well by Drain and Opal. Sqrl, what can I say? I thought you were better than a comment like that. I had a lot of respect for you. I guess I was wrong. ---
**Author:** ![ChrisCTP](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e36b37/32.png) [@ChrisCTP](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ChrisCTP)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2000, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-scarier-than-i-thought-please-read/23733/37 "2000-06-28T17:09:28Z")
Ditto, ditto, and finally…ditto. ---
**Author:** ![Satan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Satan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satan)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2000, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-scarier-than-i-thought-please-read/23733/38 "2000-06-28T17:10:48Z")
> [@](#): > > **I don’t know for sure, but I doubt Melin asked permission to post using Highlander’s name. If she did, I will apologize profusely and admit I’m an idiot.** A chat I just had with Melin: Lindy1026: When we were in chat that night, after I made the first post, I caught Lynn when she came online and pointed it out to her Lindy1026: She said they were going to let it go. Lindy1026: The next morning, I had an IM with Ed Lindy1026: So after that I felt okay making one or two additional posts on Wally threads Is this enough for you, SaxFace? * * * Yer putz, Satan :wally _I HAVE BEEN SMOKE-FREE FOR: Two months, two weeks, five days, 15 hours, 12 minutes and 42 seconds. 3225 cigarettes not smoked, saving $403.17. Life saved: 1 week, 4 days, 4 hours, 45 minutes._ ---
**Author:** ![kellibelli](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e480ec/32.png) [@kellibelli](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kellibelli)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2000, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-scarier-than-i-thought-please-read/23733/39 "2000-06-28T17:16:03Z")
Guys, lets just let it go. There doesnt need to be more hard feelings over this. ---
**Author:** ![SaxFace](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/13edae/32.png) [@SaxFace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SaxFace)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2000, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-scarier-than-i-thought-please-read/23733/40 "2000-06-28T17:18:28Z")
So she posted, pointed it out to a mod and then “felt it was okay” to make more posts? I stand by my statements. For the record, I don’t really care one way or another if Melin is banned or unbanned or whatever - she never made a significant impact on me. I just think it’s rude to put the moderators in a precarious position and I wonder if you would feel the same way if you were a moderator. As a summary, I thought banned meant banned and if I was banned I wouldn’t walk down to Ukelele Ike’s office and start posting. That’s all I’m saying. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-scarier-than-i-thought-please-read/23733.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-is-scarier-than-i-thought-please-read/23733.md?page=3)