# This week's bizarre medical odditiy. Man turning into a tree.
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-weeks-bizarre-medical-odditiy-man-turning-into-a-tree/426369
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [November 14, 2007, 2:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-weeks-bizarre-medical-odditiy-man-turning-into-a-tree/426369 "2007-11-14T14:41:53Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 5
### Author:  [@Kuboydal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kuboydal)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2007, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-weeks-bizarre-medical-odditiy-man-turning-into-a-tree/426369/81 "2007-11-15T15:46:55Z")
[QUOTE=erie774]
I wonder how he looks in the fall when the leaves change? And is he concerned about termites?
[/QUOTE]
Root rot and verticillium wilt would be on my mind.
But seriously, imagine if he is wind pollinated. Tornadoes would be orgasmic.
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### Author:  [@Philster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Philster)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2007, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-weeks-bizarre-medical-odditiy-man-turning-into-a-tree/426369/82 "2007-11-15T16:24:19Z")
Hey, maple he get better, maple he won’t, but if he spent some time at the beech, he might feel oak k. Shame about his bride leaving him, I heard she was cherry. Cedar is on thing you have to remember, he should get surgery fir himself, not for some wahoo tree surgeon to gain poplararity. Only then will he be berry happy. Although he willow a debt of gratitude to the surgeon. I’ll bet the elders in India will help him.
Come on, orange you glad you read this thread? I yam.
Yucca Yucca Yucca! 🙂
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### Author:  [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2007, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-weeks-bizarre-medical-odditiy-man-turning-into-a-tree/426369/83 "2007-11-15T17:11:30Z")
Poor guy. He has to be the foilage of our jokes.
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### Author:  [@Kuboydal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kuboydal)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2007, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-weeks-bizarre-medical-odditiy-man-turning-into-a-tree/426369/84 "2007-11-15T17:30:31Z")
I betcha he has a cankerin’ to escape.
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### Author:  [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2007, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-weeks-bizarre-medical-odditiy-man-turning-into-a-tree/426369/85 "2007-11-15T17:36:27Z")
I’m going to go out on a limb and ask:
I wonder how well he can park?..
…a Ranger?
At least he can always get a walk-on in _MacBeth_.
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### Author:  [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2007, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-weeks-bizarre-medical-odditiy-man-turning-into-a-tree/426369/86 "2007-11-15T18:18:01Z")
There should be a fund-raisin’ concert for him. It could be called LiveEnt.
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### Author:  [@Flutterby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flutterby)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2007, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-weeks-bizarre-medical-odditiy-man-turning-into-a-tree/426369/87 "2007-11-15T18:44:04Z")
This kinda reminds me of a short story I read, which basically involved people turning into fungi. (It was in a horror/erotica collection… I thought it neither horrifying nor erotic at the time but now I’m seeing the horror! :eek: )
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### Author:  [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2007, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-weeks-bizarre-medical-odditiy-man-turning-into-a-tree/426369/88 "2007-11-15T18:48:39Z")
[QUOTE=simster]
How long before this shows up on House?
[/QUOTE]
As soon as House needs a new cane.
Why wasn’t it featured on that other medical show “Doc” startting Billy Ray Cyprus
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### Author:  [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2007, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-weeks-bizarre-medical-odditiy-man-turning-into-a-tree/426369/89 "2007-11-15T19:39:19Z")
[QUOTE=Flutterby]
This kinda reminds me of a short story I read, which basically involved people turning into fungi. (It was in a horror/erotica collection.. I thought it neither horrifying nor erotic at the time but now I’m seeing the horror! :eek: )
[/QUOTE]
I’ll root around for that book, I think it’s in a trunk.
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### Author:  [@Kuboydal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kuboydal)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2007, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-weeks-bizarre-medical-odditiy-man-turning-into-a-tree/426369/90 "2007-11-15T20:00:33Z")
Too bad the Wright brothers are gone, they could use a planetree.
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### Author:  [@HeadNinja](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HeadNinja)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2007, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-weeks-bizarre-medical-odditiy-man-turning-into-a-tree/426369/91 "2007-11-15T21:28:11Z")
Not entirely keeping with the tone of the thread, but I picture the poor bastard shoving his hand into a bandsaw. Spongy bits fall off and blood gets all over. I hope he manages to carve out something that at least looks like fingers. Before the doctor came it that type of treatment seems almost reasonable.
That is one of the most disturbing things I have ever seen.
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### Author:  [@Kuboydal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kuboydal)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2007, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-weeks-bizarre-medical-odditiy-man-turning-into-a-tree/426369/92 "2007-11-15T21:36:33Z")
[QUOTE=HeadNinja]
That is one of the most disturbing things I have ever seen.
[/QUOTE]
I think you’ll find he kinda grows on ya.
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### Author:  [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2007, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-weeks-bizarre-medical-odditiy-man-turning-into-a-tree/426369/93 "2007-11-15T21:52:38Z")
[QUOTE=Kuboydal]
I think you’ll find he kinda grows on ya.
[/QUOTE]
You’re a son of a beech.
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### Author:  [@Kuboydal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kuboydal)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2007, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-weeks-bizarre-medical-odditiy-man-turning-into-a-tree/426369/94 "2007-11-15T22:02:27Z")
[QUOTE=BMalion]
You’re a son of a beech.
[/QUOTE]
May the forest be with you, aspen.
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### Author:  [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2007, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-weeks-bizarre-medical-odditiy-man-turning-into-a-tree/426369/95 "2007-11-15T22:08:08Z")
He should be okay if he has a good doctor at the elm. Perhaps he should research his roots to see where this all started. Maybe his ancestors were victims of the great Texas chainsaw massacre.
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### Author:  [@Kuboydal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kuboydal)
#### Post date: [November 15, 2007, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-weeks-bizarre-medical-odditiy-man-turning-into-a-tree/426369/96 "2007-11-15T22:28:01Z")
Could be just a case of sourwood.
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### Author:  [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)
#### Post date: [November 16, 2007, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-weeks-bizarre-medical-odditiy-man-turning-into-a-tree/426369/97 "2007-11-16T13:20:13Z")
Why was he sitting down in that photo?
Oh, forest.
Acorn was bothering him.
I hope he can mold himself a new life, maybe he can conifer out of a rich widow.
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### Author:  [@VanillaGorilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VanillaGorilla)
#### Post date: [November 16, 2007, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-weeks-bizarre-medical-odditiy-man-turning-into-a-tree/426369/98 "2007-11-16T13:39:05Z")
[QUOTE=ArchiveGuy]
So if he falls when he’s alone, does he make a sound?
[/QUOTE]
You win this thread! Possibly you win the entire internet. 😃😃
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### Author:  [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)
#### Post date: [November 16, 2007, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-weeks-bizarre-medical-odditiy-man-turning-into-a-tree/426369/99 "2007-11-16T13:58:00Z")
How much longer is everyone going to pecan him?
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### Author:  [@Ellen\_Cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellen_Cherry)
#### Post date: [November 16, 2007, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-weeks-bizarre-medical-odditiy-man-turning-into-a-tree/426369/100 "2007-11-16T14:42:38Z")
Obviously, until he starts sticking up for himself.
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