# This whole sexual accusation thing – a perspective I’ve not heard discussed **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 2, 2017, 2:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-whole-sexual-accusation-thing-a-perspective-i-ve-not-heard-discussed/803295 "2017-12-02T02:24:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 10
**Author:** ![Nisslbody](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/e36b37/32.png) [@Nisslbody](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nisslbody)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2017, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-whole-sexual-accusation-thing-a-perspective-i-ve-not-heard-discussed/803295/181 "2017-12-05T20:05:53Z")
> [@Budget\_Player\_Cadet](#): > > You’re off by a factor of 1000. 12190/119400000 \* 100 = 0.0102, _not_ 0.00001. So the actual number is 0.01%. > > Okay. A woman’s individual odds of being raped, by this calculation, are… 321,500 (stats from RAINN) / 125,000,000 = 0.002572 = 0.2%. Which is _also_ quite a small number, although I will note that it is about an order of magnitude more likely than being falsely accused of rape, which I will freely concede. > > Maybe this isn’t the best way of examining the risk. You’re right, I must have typed in an extra zero. (You’re also wrong: I incorrectly stated that 12,190/119,400,000 = 1.2^-5, rather than 1.2^-4, and THEN I multiplied by 100, putting me off by a factor of 10, not a factor of 1000: my end figure was 0.001, when it should have been 0.01.) Even so, .01% is a pretty low rate, especially given that the figures I used in my calculations almost certainly yielded a figure that is vastly, vastly inflated over the actual per-capita rate of false accusations of combined rape/sexual assault. > **[Here’s the truth about false accusations of sexual violence](https://theconversation.com/heres-the-truth-about-false-accusations-of-sexual-violence-88049)** > > Compared to how prevalent sexual harassment is, false claims are rare. > **[Publications\_NSVRC\_Overview\_False-Reporting.pdf](https://www.nsvrc.org/sites/default/files/Publications_NSVRC_Overview_False-Reporting.pdf)** > > 285.95 KB ---
**Author:** ![k9bfriender](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/k9bfriender/32/3283_2.png) [@k9bfriender](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/k9bfriender)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2017, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-whole-sexual-accusation-thing-a-perspective-i-ve-not-heard-discussed/803295/182 "2017-12-05T20:12:58Z")
> [@Nisslbody](#): > > So what you’re concerned about are breaches of social etiquette, not actual accusations? > > OK then. I suppose that accusations would not make my day go all that much better, so I am not unconcerned about them. Which is why I would conduct myself in a way such as to minimize the possibility of same. Now, in minimizing the chances of getting accused, I think that it also would decrease the “threat” that I pose to others, and make strangers less uncomfortable with my presence. Win-win. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2017, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-whole-sexual-accusation-thing-a-perspective-i-ve-not-heard-discussed/803295/183 "2017-12-05T21:04:16Z")
> [@Senegoid](#): > > YThe big problem is not children making overt accusations of sexual assault. The problem is the Big Folks making absurd over-the-top interpretations of the most innocuous incidents. Did you see my post, in which I mention that my 3rd grade teacher tucked in my shirt for me? Do you recognize how the shit could have hit the fan IF (a) that had happened today AND (b) if I had innocuously mentioned it to somebody. I’m a third grade teacher. A couple of weeks ago, a female teacher brought a boy to me who needed help with his belt. She was uncomfortable helping him, so she stayed and watched me help him. NBD. Would I tuck in a kid’s shirt? Nope. Would I do it without another adult around? Oh hell no. Again, no big deal. > [@](#): > > It may have been resolved, buy you can be sure that **Shagnasty** has a permanent dossier at CPS now. If he ever pats his daughter on the back again while she has a sunburn, he could be in big shit trouble. No, he wouldn’t be. That’s absurd. Your example of why men should be concerned is that 1. An accusation was made. 2. The police investigated. 3. They found that there was no problem. Speculation about how if you watched another game in that city you’d be in trouble is very silly. No, you wouldn’t be in trouble. They found that there was no problem! People are imagining all sorts of terrible circumstances, and when they’re called out for the silliness of them, you’re like “NO BUT WAIT THE POLICE APOLOGIZED TO ME AND THE COMPLAINT WAS WITHDRAWN.” I really don’t see how that supports the idea that men are in trouble here. ---
**Author:** ![Banquet\_Bear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/banquet_bear/32/373_2.png) [@Banquet\_Bear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Banquet_Bear)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2017, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-whole-sexual-accusation-thing-a-perspective-i-ve-not-heard-discussed/803295/184 "2017-12-06T00:10:45Z")
> [@DSeid](#): > > And the rest of of your quote: Okay, I get how labelling his fear a “perspective” can rub **jsgodess** the wrong way, but what else of his op sharing of his fear while expressing an awareness that there are many victims and some empathy for them, was so “insulting”? …its insulting to conflate the whole “sexual accusation thing” with the “sitting next to a girl in the theatre” thing. As I said earlier in the thread: [QUOTE=me] What does the whole “sexual accusation thing” have to do with somebody who fears that their “world might be destroyed” because they sat next to a girl in a movie theatre? How do the people doing the “sexual accusation thing” fix that? Do they stop coming forward? Do they remain silent, as they nearly always have done? Annabella Sciorra slept with a baseball bat beside her bed for twenty years because of what Weinstein did to her. Should she have remained silent because people sometimes falsely accuse? What can Annabella Sciorra do to fix the OP’s problem? We all know that they can’t do anything about that and they shouldn’t. If they were sexually assaulted, harassed, or raped, then if they should come forward and tell their story if they wish too. Women coming forward and the situation in the OP are unconnected. It is insulting to conflate the two. It is entirely fair to ask and pose the questions the OP is asking. It is entirely not fair to ask those questions in the context of the whole “sexual accusation thing.” Because to do so implies that “the solution” to the OP’s feelings lies with the people making the accusations: and it does not. [/QUOTE] > [@](#): > > For the record, I am sorry that **Broomstick** also, for reasons other that those of the op, has “paranoid alertness” about people in movie theaters. I appreciate the fact that she is not alone in that sense and do wonder how widespread that degree of worry is. I also appreciate that that worry is less irrational than the op’s. The broader subject of sexual assault by strangers (which occurs albeit less often than by those already known to the victim) is of real concern. It is a fear women have to deal with that men do not. Ya see? This is how the whole empathy thing works. > [@](#): > > And since I am male and this is all about me (amirite?) how much _should_ males be concerned that they are setting off the fears of women by themselves or of parents? Hey: I’m a male too! Its all about me as well! > [@](#): > > Should they intentionally give additional personal space to a woman in a populated public space than they would to a male to avoid triggering anxiety? Is it really necessary for males to be careful about not letting your eyes linger on any one child who isn’t interacting with your own child as reasonable caution, to be sure to communicate through body language that they’e not particularly interested in the other kids? > > Personally I have no concern about looking at kids on a playground and smiling at the things they do. I just have not ever considered that I would potentially be seen as Aqualung based on my gender. I am however conscious to not follow too closely behind woman going into a parking structure at night, for example. Not because I am afraid of a false charge though, but because I am afraid of making her afraid. But I would not think of giving additional personal space over another unknown male sitting at a movie. Should I? The question is independent of whether or not the fear of a male sitting nearby in a theater is rational or irrational. It is based on whether or not it is commonly held. Why are you asking me these questions? You do you. There is no “set of rules” that will ensure you will navigate every situation in life without upsetting somebody else. There is no magic checklist. > [@](#): > > Is asking these questions allowed or is it also “What About MEEEEE???” Of course you are allowed to ask these questions. You’ve just asked those questions. But I wouldn’t hold my breath waiting for a definitive answer. ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2017, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-whole-sexual-accusation-thing-a-perspective-i-ve-not-heard-discussed/803295/185 "2017-12-06T00:56:31Z")
> [@k9bfriender](#): > > Should I not be concerned about the people I sit near, should I not be concerned about their irrational fear that I may molest them? > > I’m not really worried about having my life ruined, but having my movie made less enjoyable, sure. If I am getting dirty looks from a parent who thinks I am sitting too close, or a woman who feels I have invaded her space, and you know what, they aren’t going to be enjoying the movie either. > > So yeah, I’m going to be aware of my surroundings, and avoid doing any actions that could be taken as malicious, because even if I don’t get accused, even if I go on about my day without a single recrimination, if I take actions that could be interpreted as malicious, I could be ruining someone else’s day. I try to be aware of people’s space, too. I don’t stand too close. I don’t sit close when there are other options. I don’t touch people for no reason. I don’t stare. I don’t talk really loudly. I don’t ask personal questions. And on and on. This is partly for me (I don’t want to be that close to people) and partly for other people (they don’t want me scrunched up next to them either). But I wouldn’t tend to move if I’m somewhere first. And if seats are scarce, for example on the train, I will sit next to someone, and I expect someone to sit next to me. (If seats are plentiful, it’s fucking weird to sit right next to someone. But people do it. Gah.) I am absolutely opposed to any attempt to shame you out of the public sphere, or make it seem like you have no right to go to a movie and just enjoy yourself. If I know someone has an irrational fear, I won’t deliberately trigger it, but I will live my life. I won’t force my husband (who is afraid of flying) to watch movies about plane crashes, but I will fly somewhere if it makes sense. (I don’t think my getting on a plane bothers him, actually, so this is a bad analogy. And I don’t tend to watch movies with plane crashes. This is for illustrative purposes only!) ---
**Author:** ![Tee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/73ab20/32.png) [@Tee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tee)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2017, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-whole-sexual-accusation-thing-a-perspective-i-ve-not-heard-discussed/803295/186 "2017-12-06T04:11:08Z")
> [@DSeid](#): > > And the rest of of your quote: Okay, I get how labelling his fear a “perspective” can rub **jsgodess** the wrong way, but what else of his op sharing of his fear while expressing an awareness that there are many victims and some empathy for them, was so “insulting”? The OP explained how in the context of the recent sexual stuff in the media, innocent men are no longer safe. That’s the takeaway after months of hearing long-buried personal accounts of victims. It’s a perspective in my book, and I appreciate knowing who has it. > [@Senegoid](#): > > The big problem is not children making overt accusations of sexual assault. The problem is the Big Folks making absurd over-the-top interpretations of the most innocuous incidents. I agree with that on a couple of levels. Some parents can be virulently and stupidly anti-perv to the point of being harmful. (_Don’t go past the end of the street, bad men will steal you_! - one mother’s words.) Some parents will do it strategically like in custody cases. Both kinds of people are acting with complete moral certainty and thinking only of the children. Yeah, that’s a problem. ---
**Author:** ![Grim\_Render](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a87d85/32.png) [@Grim\_Render](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grim_Render)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2017, 12:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-whole-sexual-accusation-thing-a-perspective-i-ve-not-heard-discussed/803295/187 "2017-12-06T12:07:34Z")
> [@Budget\_Player\_Cadet](#): > > Okay. A woman’s individual odds of being raped, by this calculation, are… 321,500 (stats from RAINN) / 125,000,000 = 0.002572 = 0.2%. Which is _also_ quite a small number, although I will note that it is about an order of magnitude more likely than being falsely accused of rape, which I will freely concede. > > Maybe this isn’t the best way of examining the risk. This is fairly close to what I’ve seen, although I’ve seen the figure of 8% false accusations used, so the result was a 1 in 12 rate of false accusations to reported rapes. (The rate compared to actual rapes and not just reported ones is going to be much lower of course). But if we cut the number of rapes by a factor of 12, would we then feel it was acceptable to dismiss women’s fear of rape or strangers? Tell them to just get over it? I think not. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2017, 12:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-whole-sexual-accusation-thing-a-perspective-i-ve-not-heard-discussed/803295/188 "2017-12-06T12:38:19Z")
> [@Grim\_Render](#): > > But if we cut the number of rapes by a factor of 12, would we then feel it was acceptable to dismiss women’s fear of rape or strangers? Tell them to just get over it? I think not. People keep trying to remove context. We shouldn’t do that. If a woman wrote an analogous OP, about her fear that the guy sitting next to her in the theater were going to rape her right there, it’d be fair to tell her the fear was unreasonable. (Note that if she were afraid he’d molest her in the theater, that might be more reasonable–but I’m having trouble Googling any stats on this sort of crime, due to a movie theater that recently shut down because of sexual assault by management, and Stranger Things star firing agent over sexual assault; maybe you’ve got better Google fu than I have). ---
**Author:** ![Grim\_Render](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a87d85/32.png) [@Grim\_Render](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grim_Render)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2017, 12:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-whole-sexual-accusation-thing-a-perspective-i-ve-not-heard-discussed/803295/189 "2017-12-06T12:57:26Z")
> [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#): > > People keep trying to remove context. We shouldn’t do that. If a woman wrote an analogous OP, about her fear that the guy sitting next to her in the theater were going to rape her right there, it’d be fair to tell her the fear was unreasonable. (Note that if she were afraid he’d molest her in the theater, that might be more reasonable–but I’m having trouble Googling any stats on this sort of crime, due to a movie theater that recently shut down because of sexual assault by management, and Stranger Things star firing agent over sexual assault; maybe you’ve got better Google fu than I have). You are absolutely correct about the specific situation in the theatre. The odds would seem to be so low that if you were to go around concerned about such odds you would never dare get in a car. It is well into “groundless worry” territory. I was replying to the notion that worry about false accusations in general are unreasonable. A false accusation can ruin lives, and is 1 / 12th of the number of reported rapes low enough that worrying about it is unreasonable? Of course, women’s situation are much worse. But that does not alter whether it is a realistic worry or not. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2017, 1:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-whole-sexual-accusation-thing-a-perspective-i-ve-not-heard-discussed/803295/190 "2017-12-06T13:10:45Z")
> [@Grim\_Render](#): > > I was replying to the notion that worry about false accusations in general are unreasonable. A false accusation can ruin lives, and is 1 / 12th of the number of reported rapes low enough that worrying about it is unreasonable? > > Of course, women’s situation are much worse. But that does not alter whether it is a realistic worry or not. This is my perspective almost exactly. The stock phrase should be altered a bit: “A woman’s worst fear is that she will be killed. A man’s worst fear is that he will be put into prison for years based on a completely fabricated occurrence.” As a matter of fact, getting law enforcement up in your face about why you’re in a certain place is a bit more serious than being “laughed at” as the phrase goes. While I therefore think the possible severity is high in both cases, their occurrence is at least an order of magnitude less for men (Looking at false accusations only. Men of course can be abused as well.) ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2017, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-whole-sexual-accusation-thing-a-perspective-i-ve-not-heard-discussed/803295/191 "2017-12-06T13:20:55Z")
[quote=“Tee, post:186, topic:803295”] The OP explained how in the context of the recent sexual stuff in the media, innocent men are no longer safe. That’s the takeaway after months of hearing long-buried personal accounts of victims. It’s a perspective in my book, and I appreciate knowing who has it./QUOTE] Hearing long-buried personal accounts of victims leads to thinking innocent men are no longer safe? ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2017, 1:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-whole-sexual-accusation-thing-a-perspective-i-ve-not-heard-discussed/803295/192 "2017-12-06T13:33:32Z")
> [@Ludovic](#): > > This is my perspective almost exactly. The stock phrase should be altered a bit: “A woman’s worst fear is that she will be killed. A man’s worst fear is that he will be put into prison for years based on a completely fabricated occurrence.” As a matter of fact, getting law enforcement up in your face about why you’re in a certain place is a bit more serious than being “laughed at” as the phrase goes. So, yeah. Getting law enforcement asking you questions can be serious. But even then, there’s a spectrum. On one end is law enforcement drawing weapons, shouting at you, calling in a dozen cars. On the other end is law enforcement approaching you quietly and respectfully, telling you that they have to investigate every call, and assuring you that everything is all right as they leave. The incidents we’ve heard about in this thread involve the latter end of the spectrum, and again, I have a hard time worrying too much about it. If it happened to me, it’d shake me up no question–but it’s not anywhere in the same ballpark as an assault. Maybe it’s about as disturbing as multiple cat calls at a single woman walking alone past a group of men? ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2017, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-whole-sexual-accusation-thing-a-perspective-i-ve-not-heard-discussed/803295/193 "2017-12-06T13:39:57Z")
> [@Grim\_Render](#): > > I was replying to the notion that worry about false accusations in general are unreasonable. Has anyone expressed that notion in this thread? Honest question. This thread prompted me to revisit the history of the Duke Lacrosse accusations, the quintessential “false accusations ruin lives” story. And those were some scary, messed up allegations. And maybe they should frighten me. But I’ll be honest, I’m not personally worried about that sort of thing, because I don’t try to hire white strippers and then make awful comments to the nonwhite women that show up, including brandishing a broom handle with suggestions about how it could be used and shouting racial epithets at the women and afterward sending an email about calling more strippers, murdering them, and flaying them. Sure, this may come across as, “They came for the douchebag frat boys, and I didn’t speak up because I wasn’t a douchebag frat boy.” But I’ll be honest, not being a douchebag frat boy is pretty central to my self-image, and it’s hard for me to worry about myself based on their plight. False accusations against teachers occur, rarely. I think I worry about them to the correct degree: I don’t give students rides home in my car, I don’t spend time alone in a room with individual students, I’m very careful about how I touch students. I take sensible precautions in keeping with district policy. Yes, a false accusation could still technically occur–but they’re rare enough that I worry more about things like car accidents and heart disease and our terrible president, things that present a much greater and more realistic threat to my way of life. ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2017, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-whole-sexual-accusation-thing-a-perspective-i-ve-not-heard-discussed/803295/194 "2017-12-06T13:45:17Z")
> [@jtur88](#): > > I wonder if now, in our society, if children are also suffering from systematic absence of hands-on affection. But the social warning system has taught them to never accept it from anyone. What happens then? There are always some kids who suffer from this sort of deprivation. But this notion that it might be a more widespread phenomenon today than it has been in the past is utterly without foundation, AFAICT. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2017, 1:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-whole-sexual-accusation-thing-a-perspective-i-ve-not-heard-discussed/803295/195 "2017-12-06T13:52:35Z")
> [@jtur88](#): > > I wonder if now, in our society, if children are also suffering from systematic absence of hands-on affection. But the social warning system has taught them to never accept it from anyone. What happens then? Again I’ll talk from personal experience. Last week I sat in on a lesson for third graders on safe touch, given by someone from a local organization that works on sexual violence issues. It was a professional, age-appropriate presentation, that talked about touch in a sophisticated way: there’s welcome friendly touch, unwelcome friendly touch, unfriendly touch (shoves, punches, etc.), and inappropriate touch (bathing suit area being the age-appropriate metric here). Students discussed appropriate responses to each kind of touch. I don’t know if this is the sort of social warning system that’s everywhere, but there was nothing in the presentation that made me think your concerns are valid. Nor does my daily experience with children make me think the concerns hold water. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2017, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-whole-sexual-accusation-thing-a-perspective-i-ve-not-heard-discussed/803295/196 "2017-12-06T14:12:55Z")
> [@RTFirefly](#): > > There are always some kids who suffer from this sort of deprivation. But this notion that it might be a more widespread phenomenon today than it has been in the past is utterly without foundation, AFAICT. I agree with this even given the “stranger danger” paranoia around still today. In the past century there have been times where it was considered pampering to be affectionate to even your own children, and their feelings in general are also more respected these days instead of being told what to do %100 of the time. ---
**Author:** ![Tee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/73ab20/32.png) [@Tee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tee)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2017, 2:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-whole-sexual-accusation-thing-a-perspective-i-ve-not-heard-discussed/803295/197 "2017-12-06T14:21:44Z")
> [@jsgoddess](#): > > Hearing long-buried personal accounts of victims leads to thinking innocent men are no longer safe? That is the entirety of the OP. This whole sexual accusation thing –\> a perspective I’ve not heard discussed ----\> I could be ruined at any time ----\> no man is safe. From my POV that _is_ very insulting and I think it’s good to know who is out there promoting this line of thinking. From his POV the existence of whatever small number of false accusations makes it valid. ---
**Author:** ![Darth\_Hamsandwich](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/4bbf92/32.png) [@Darth\_Hamsandwich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darth_Hamsandwich)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2017, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-whole-sexual-accusation-thing-a-perspective-i-ve-not-heard-discussed/803295/198 "2017-12-06T14:57:39Z")
> [@Tee](#): > > That is the entirety of the OP. This whole sexual accusation thing –\> a perspective I’ve not heard discussed ----\> I could be ruined at any time ----\> no man is safe. \*\*From my POV that _is_ very insulting and I think it’s good to know who is out there promoting this line of thinking. \*\* From his POV the existence of whatever small number of false accusations makes it valid. Bolding mine. I don’t know what the percentage of false accusations is, but yeah it happens, and it can change your outlook to one of a nagging fear. Another anecdote: when I first started dating my girlfriend, one of her daughters didn’t take to me. I had asked her to do some chores around the house like cleaning her room or cleaning up messes that she had made. One day I got a call from her Grandmother saying that the daughter had accused me of binding her to a chair, groping her, and then physically beating her. After everyone got involved, she finally broke down and confessed it was a lie. But I can assure you that before the admission was made the entire family cross-examined me, my girlfriend included. I thought my life was over at that point, I really did. Someone mentioned upthread that a six year old has no concept of sexual assault and wouldn’t make accusations in the first place. Well, a nine-year old certainly understood the concept, if not the underlying ramifications of it. It shook me up and still shakes me up when I think about what could have happened. Like I said, I don’t know what the % of false accusations is, but there is a % of accusations made that get settled before it becomes a statistic. ---
**Author:** ![sachertorte](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sachertorte/32/3727_2.png) [@sachertorte](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sachertorte)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2017, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-whole-sexual-accusation-thing-a-perspective-i-ve-not-heard-discussed/803295/199 "2017-12-06T16:04:46Z")
> [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#): > > False accusations against teachers occur, rarely. I think I worry about them to the correct degree: I don’t give students rides home in my car, I don’t spend time alone in a room with individual students, I’m very careful about how I touch students. I take sensible precautions in keeping with district policy. Yes, a false accusation could still technically occur–but they’re rare enough that I worry more about things like car accidents and heart disease and our terrible president, things that present a much greater and more realistic threat to my way of life. I’m with you pretty much in this thread, but I don’t see much difference between your exercising precautions and MMM’s contemplating taking precautions in a movie theater. Why is one “sensible” and the other “irrational?” I am a bit perplexed with MMM’s timing. The stranger danger thing has been around for ages. I don’t see much connection between that and the current sexual harassment stuff. Also, there’s a whole host of assholes who think gay people are after their children. I don’t think it’s irrational at all to want to stay away from strange children. ---
**Author:** ![k9bfriender](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/k9bfriender/32/3283_2.png) [@k9bfriender](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/k9bfriender)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2017, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-whole-sexual-accusation-thing-a-perspective-i-ve-not-heard-discussed/803295/200 "2017-12-06T16:13:29Z")
> [@sachertorte](#): > > I am a bit perplexed with MMM’s timing. The stranger danger thing has been around for ages. I don’t see much connection between that and the current sexual harassment stuff. I think the timing is in that stories of sexual assault are more likely to be believed. In the not so distant past, an accusation (true or false) could be just brushed off. A false accusation would be annoying and inconvenient, but not a life destroying event. With people’s lives being destroyed by credible allegations, it is worth considering whether your life could be destroyed by a false allegation as well. There are times and places where I do think that this could be a bit of a concern, but public places like theaters and parks are not, IMHO, one of those. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-whole-sexual-accusation-thing-a-perspective-i-ve-not-heard-discussed/803295.md?page=9) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/this-whole-sexual-accusation-thing-a-perspective-i-ve-not-heard-discussed/803295.md?page=11)