# Thoughts on Bathroom Tissue **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 15, 2024, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thoughts-on-bathroom-tissue/997609 "2024-02-15T17:00:04Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2024, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thoughts-on-bathroom-tissue/997609/101 "2024-02-25T14:50:36Z")
> [@InternetLegend](#): > > I was looking at getting an outlet by the toilet for a heated bidet seat, but it would have been really difficult and expensive to run the wiring. I see that many of you don’t think you need heated water, but either my water is way colder than yours or you’re made of hardier stuff than I am. The cold water coming out of my faucets, especially on winter mornings, is uncomfortable to wash hands in, much less to spray on a much more sensitive area. Experiment for you. Take the cover off your toilet tank, and flush the toilet. When the tank refills, feel the water with your hand. That’s the temperature that a bidet will deliver. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2024, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thoughts-on-bathroom-tissue/997609/102 "2024-02-25T14:53:13Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > Take the cover off your toilet tank, and flush the toilet. When the tank refills, feel the water with your hand. That’s the temperature that a bidet will deliver. The water in your tank will be about room temperature but my water comes out of the tap colder than that. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2024, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thoughts-on-bathroom-tissue/997609/103 "2024-02-25T14:56:09Z")
The water that just went into the tank is the temperature that a putative bidet would deliver. You could even feel it as it’s coming out of the float valve. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2024, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thoughts-on-bathroom-tissue/997609/104 "2024-02-25T15:38:38Z")
My bad. Didn’t read your post carefully. Tap water should be the same temp. ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2024, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thoughts-on-bathroom-tissue/997609/105 "2024-02-25T15:49:11Z")
I frequently wash my hands with cold water, because i can’t be bothered to wait for hot water. I assume that’s the temp I’d get from an unheated bidet. ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_Paprika](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr_paprika/32/3042_2.png) [@Dr\_Paprika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Paprika)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2024, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thoughts-on-bathroom-tissue/997609/106 "2024-02-25T17:25:58Z")
Shea butter sounds comforting. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2024, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thoughts-on-bathroom-tissue/997609/107 "2024-02-26T16:15:04Z")
Do you have any idea how many sheas you have to milk to get even an _ounce_ of shea butter? ---
**Author:** ![Tibby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tibby/32/17030_2.png) [@Tibby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tibby)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2024, 4:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thoughts-on-bathroom-tissue/997609/108 "2024-02-26T16:18:33Z")
2…touché ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_Paprika](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr_paprika/32/3042_2.png) [@Dr\_Paprika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Paprika)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2024, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thoughts-on-bathroom-tissue/997609/109 "2024-02-26T16:24:14Z")
Sounds like udder nonsense. ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2024, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thoughts-on-bathroom-tissue/997609/110 "2024-02-26T16:33:41Z")
I have a bathroom cabinet with otherwise unused space between the top and the ceiling that turned out to be a good place to store toilet paper. This led to some deliberation: the size packages that make maximum use of the available space are either nine or eighteen jumbo rolls. But five such nine-rolls doesn’t quite fit so I typically store four jumbo and one double. ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2024, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thoughts-on-bathroom-tissue/997609/111 "2024-02-26T16:35:35Z")
> [@Die\_Capacitrix](#): > > 4 layers with Shea Butter That seems so over-the-top I legit thought it was a joke at first. ---
**Author:** ![Orville\_mogul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/aeb1de/32.png) [@Orville\_mogul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Orville_mogul)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2024, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thoughts-on-bathroom-tissue/997609/112 "2024-02-26T17:19:10Z")
Dangit @Die_Capacitrix you beat me to it! I was all set to post about Hackle. I have tried a lot of TP in my time, but the 4-ply Hackle with camomile is the best ever. I doubt any Canadian Cashmere could top our Swiss yellow puppies! ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Finn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dewey_finn/32/4222_2.png) [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2024, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thoughts-on-bathroom-tissue/997609/113 "2024-02-26T17:25:59Z")
I heard on _Wait Wait… Don’t Tell Me!_ that prior to a visit by Barack and Michelle Obama to Buckingham Palace to visit the Queen, the White House was asked about their toilet paper preferences. Apparently the Queen, ever the gracious hostess, catered to the comfort of her guests to _that_ level. It never occured to me to provide my guests options. (Though my job has involved a lot of travel lately so I’ve heard some of the quirks of my co-workers. One was annoyed that the hotel housekeeper removed his personal roll of toilet paper from the room; he apparently traveled with his preferred paper.) ---
**Author:** ![TruCelt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trucelt/32/523_2.png) [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)\ **Post date:** [February 27, 2024, 12:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thoughts-on-bathroom-tissue/997609/114 "2024-02-27T00:45:41Z")
> [@Dewey\_Finn](#): > > Apparently the Queen, ever the gracious hostess, catered to the comfort of her guests to _that_ level. It never occurred to me to provide my guests options. Once I was in a hotel room that had two toilet paper dispensers. One was hung with the paper falling forward, and the other with the paper falling backward. LOL! ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_Paprika](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr_paprika/32/3042_2.png) [@Dr\_Paprika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Paprika)\ **Post date:** [February 27, 2024, 2:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thoughts-on-bathroom-tissue/997609/115 "2024-02-27T02:54:53Z")
I’m not completely sure that specifying bathroom tissue requirements counts as _grace_. At some point, it is annoying if your barista spells out the many types of non-milk available when not requested to do so. One presumes the Crown just use rolls of velvet and keep a plumber on call. Unless of course, you can request an exceedingly specific pattern. But the idea reminds me of the Mitch Hedberg bit where he hopes a king will come and visit him. “You’re not going to believe this, but I have a bed that meets your exact requirements.” ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_Paprika](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr_paprika/32/3042_2.png) [@Dr\_Paprika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Paprika)\ **Post date:** [February 27, 2024, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thoughts-on-bathroom-tissue/997609/116 "2024-02-27T18:55:21Z")
Dear White House, Please accept my deepest apologies for this query to ascertain your bathroom tissue needs. As per our diplomatic protocol, we strive to ensure maximal comfort of our Honoured Guests. This involves taking into full and due consideration their preferences, dislikes and allergies. Accordingly, Her/His Majesty humbly asks with the greatest possible respect: Chinchilla, Squirrel or Rabbit? ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Finn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dewey_finn/32/4222_2.png) [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)\ **Post date:** [February 27, 2024, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thoughts-on-bathroom-tissue/997609/117 "2024-02-27T19:40:01Z")
It’s a royal residence. Surely they would use ermine? ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_Paprika](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr_paprika/32/3042_2.png) [@Dr\_Paprika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Paprika)\ **Post date:** [February 27, 2024, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thoughts-on-bathroom-tissue/997609/118 "2024-02-27T20:16:28Z")
Do they still go on hunts? Because nothing beats wiping with snipe. ---
**Author:** ![Tibby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tibby/32/17030_2.png) [@Tibby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tibby)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2024, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thoughts-on-bathroom-tissue/997609/119 "2024-02-28T13:17:05Z")
> [@Dewey\_Finn](#): > > It’s a royal residence. Surely they would use ermine? Or the scalps of The Tower of London’s beheaded prisoners. ---
**Author:** ![GaryM](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/garym/32/241_2.png) [@GaryM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GaryM)\ **Post date:** [February 28, 2024, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thoughts-on-bathroom-tissue/997609/120 "2024-02-28T14:01:09Z")
> [@Tibby](#): > > Or the scalps of The Tower of London’s beheaded prisoners But no crew cuts! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thoughts-on-bathroom-tissue/997609.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/thoughts-on-bathroom-tissue/997609.md?page=7)