# Threadfight!!!

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/threadfight/183915>\
**Category:** The BBQ Pit\
**Created:** [June 24, 2003, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/threadfight/183915 "2003-06-24T01:47:39Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 6

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**Author:** ![as\_u\_wish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/6f9a4e/32.png) [@as\_u\_wish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/as_u_wish)\
**Post date:** [June 25, 2003, 12:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/threadfight/183915/101 "2003-06-25T12:28:17Z")

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Is it too early for a bloody mary and a chaser?

\<as\_u\_wish parks it at the bar with the early crowd to wait for some action…there is a crowd, right? I mean, it’s Wednesday, for cryin’ out loud.\>

Am I the only one who thought LNO’s name meant Hell No?

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**Author:** ![elf6c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c57346/32.png) [@elf6c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elf6c)\
**Post date:** [June 25, 2003, 1:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/threadfight/183915/102 "2003-06-25T13:21:47Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Gary Kumquat \*  
> \*\*soccer? SOCCER? ARGGGHHHH!
> 
> _::grabs nearest offensive weapon, in this case a bowl of pretzels, and starts pelting Scylla with the lightly salted snacks::_
> 
> Last time you ever accuse a rugby fan of being a soccer hooligan, god damn it. And your snacks are crap - don’t you get cheese and onion in this godless country? \*\*

Jeese I bring some nice salty snacks to the party and someone guy who can’t handle his booze just throws them around. Now I am going to have to make another trip to the store for snacks.

Anyone want something as long I have to go? Gary I am not sure they will have your precious “cheese and onion” snack- is there some other ghastly culinary abomination I can get for you?

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**Author:** ![Gary\_Kumquat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4491bb/32.png) [@Gary\_Kumquat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gary_Kumquat)\
**Post date:** [June 25, 2003, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/threadfight/183915/103 "2003-06-25T13:37:07Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by kabbes \*  
> **Scottish rugby? Isn’t that a contradiction in terms?**

_::reaches into sporran, removes comedy mallet::_

TTTWWAANNNGGGG!

Take that, ya southern nonce.

Oi, and elf6c, fa the fook’s me snacks? Any chance of you getting us a deep fried mars bar while you got your apron on, like?

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**Author:** ![jweb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/71c47a/32.png) [@jweb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jweb)\
**Post date:** [June 25, 2003, 1:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/threadfight/183915/104 "2003-06-25T13:44:26Z")

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**elf6c** , while you’re out, get me some goddamn pizza. I’m hungry , damnit. Pretzels just aren’t cutting it anymore.

Hell no, I ain’t giving you any money. Just get me the fucking pizza before I get off my barstool. You don’t want to make me angry, do you? And if there’s any onions or olives on it, so help me god…

Barkeep! 3 more shots of Turkey!

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**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\
**Post date:** [June 25, 2003, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/threadfight/183915/105 "2003-06-25T13:56:24Z")

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I’ll give the proprieter one thing… these carpeted walls are great for scratching your back.

_Nnnnuh nnnuuuh nnuuuhhh ahhhhh_

Woah, look at that vomit trail. No wonder they call him Airman.

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**Author:** ![Spiff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiff/32/9852_2.png) [@Spiff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiff)\
**Post date:** [June 25, 2003, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/threadfight/183915/106 "2003-06-25T14:29:10Z")

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Damn it, **lieu**. those are Velcro walls, and we need 'em for the Midget Tossing Contest.

And now the midgets ain’t even gonna stick 'coz the walls are all full of your stinky back hair.

Cripes, would it kill ya you get that skanky ho of a common law wife of yours to get out a weed whacker and cut down that hair jungle once or twice a year? Yeesh!

And since the midgets ain’t showed up yet, I’m just gonna toss the first hoser who looks at me funny up against the wall.

:: waits ::

Allriight, **Bippy** , you’ve crossed me one time too many.

:: FLING! ::

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**Author:** ![elf6c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c57346/32.png) [@elf6c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elf6c)\
**Post date:** [June 25, 2003, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/threadfight/183915/107 "2003-06-25T14:31:19Z")

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**Gary Kumquat** deep fried Mars bar- yummm sounds unhealthy. I will get ten then.

Also, I wouldn’t have to wear this damn apron if you light weights would just stop puking everywhere. Thank god the host had a whole closet filled with ladies clothes in his size- the apron fits quite nicely. Although I hope nobody in fact tries to "Kiss

**jweb** How does pepperoni, mushroom and green pepper with extra chesse sound? Actually its free, so really I don’t care what the fuck you think. Besides, you couldn’t get off that stool without falling on you ass again- so stay put. Don’t worry about the money, we all heard you whiny lament about spending your whole paycheck on Magic the Gathering Cards then losing them to a 14 year old- so its my treat.

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**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\
**Post date:** [June 25, 2003, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/threadfight/183915/108 "2003-06-25T17:40:08Z")

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\<being Beardless, I fail to adhere to the velcro wall and slide off\>  
Now I realy need a G&T.  
“Garry you Rugger Bugger, who won the six nations?”

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**Author:** ![Ale](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f19dbf/32.png) [@Ale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ale)\
**Post date:** [June 25, 2003, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/threadfight/183915/109 "2003-06-25T21:45:40Z")

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Uhh… hello, I was wondering… well, see; I´m bleeding quite a bit from the gator bite, and I was wondering if anyone could lend me the phone to call the paramedics. I´m feeling kind of dizzy…  
Geez!, I didn`t know there was a disco dance floor here, them nice colours!.. uuuh!aaghhh! mommy!..

_drops unconcious to the floor_

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**Author:** ![shelbo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3d9bf3/32.png) [@shelbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shelbo)\
**Post date:** [June 25, 2003, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/threadfight/183915/110 "2003-06-25T22:27:03Z")

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Oh, hey, a pool table! I played that once in college! Looks like it might be fun!  
Hmm, you play for money you say? Well, surrrre, I guess I will . . . Shoot, all I have is this $100, is that all right?

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**Author:** ![shelbo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3d9bf3/32.png) [@shelbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shelbo)\
**Post date:** [June 25, 2003, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/threadfight/183915/111 "2003-06-25T22:35:32Z")

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Great, $100 it is then. (Beer? Uh, no . . . no thanks! Not just yet!) Mind if I break?

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**Author:** ![shelbo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3d9bf3/32.png) [@shelbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shelbo)\
**Post date:** [June 25, 2003, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/threadfight/183915/112 "2003-06-25T22:43:58Z")

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Oh, my, now THAT was lucky! Two in off the break! Does that mean I get to go again?

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**Author:** ![shelbo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3d9bf3/32.png) [@shelbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shelbo)\
**Post date:** [June 25, 2003, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/threadfight/183915/113 "2003-06-25T22:49:45Z")

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Boy, you had some bad luck there! I can’t believe some of those shots that fell for me! Sheesh! Uh, should we play again? Double or nothing?

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**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\
**Post date:** [June 25, 2003, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/threadfight/183915/114 "2003-06-25T22:53:00Z")

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Jeezus, this thread is _still_ going?

Don’t you folks do anything constructive? Cripes!

Tripler  
And good Lord, look at **Airman** ’s puke trail!

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**Author:** ![elf6c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c57346/32.png) [@elf6c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elf6c)\
**Post date:** [June 25, 2003, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/threadfight/183915/115 "2003-06-25T23:50:44Z")

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Umm, **shelbo** nobody’s using that table for _pool_ if you know what I mean. Didn’t you notice the sweaty assprints on the felt?

😃

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**Author:** ![Baker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bb73d2/32.png) [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)\
**Post date:** [June 26, 2003, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/threadfight/183915/116 "2003-06-26T03:06:49Z")

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Okay, who has my tribble? I hope nobody has been feeding him any of this crappy snack food being tossed around!

Oh, there you are, my fuzzy, wuzzy darling! No, wait, you’re beige, and **Mr. T** ribble, was brown with a black stripe. Oh, but you’re so cute too! How about just a taste of that pizza **elf6c** brought? _That’s_ my little precious!

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**Author:** ![Airman\_Doors\_USAF](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e36b37/32.png) [@Airman\_Doors\_USAF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Airman_Doors_USAF)\
**Post date:** [June 26, 2003, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/threadfight/183915/117 "2003-06-26T03:36:26Z")

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_burp_

I’m not as think as you drunk I am. I’ve only had tee martunis.

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**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\
**Post date:** [June 26, 2003, 4:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/threadfight/183915/118 "2003-06-26T04:16:36Z")

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Barkeep, I’ll have two of what **Amn Doors** is having. And bring one for him.

Tripler  
Actually, make that two rounds of each.

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**Author:** ![Yeticus\_Rex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/a698b9/32.png) [@Yeticus\_Rex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yeticus_Rex)\
**Post date:** [June 26, 2003, 5:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/threadfight/183915/119 "2003-06-26T05:00:14Z")

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**Tripler** , haven’t you had enough already, I won the first foosball game, 10-9! That’s 28 shots of whiskey already!

Oh, and you owe 50 bucks…Double or nothing?

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**Author:** ![Terrifel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c68b51/32.png) [@Terrifel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terrifel)\
**Post date:** [June 26, 2003, 12:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/threadfight/183915/120 "2003-06-26T12:20:39Z")

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_holds up tribble_

Yo, **Baker**! Is this thing yours? Damn thing ate my Chex mix.

Also, it’s a little damp. I think someone was using it as a bar rag.

Hey, check it out! The little guy seems to like Budweiser. Oh well, no accounting for taste, I guess…

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