# Three reindeer walk into a bar... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 23, 2017, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/three-reindeer-walk-into-a-bar/805108 "2017-12-23T03:53:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2017, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/three-reindeer-walk-into-a-bar/805108/41 "2017-12-23T21:10:41Z")
Damn, I thought of a twist a little bit late. A bear walks into a bar and says, “Pour me a beer…please.” The bartender says, “Sure. But what’s with the big pause?” “I’m taking acting classes from William Shatner.” ---
**Author:** ![Morgenstern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Morgenstern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgenstern)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2017, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/three-reindeer-walk-into-a-bar/805108/42 "2017-12-23T21:37:53Z")
A guy walks into a bar and orders a double. then another double then another double Finally the bartender asks “what’s up?” “Celebrating my first blow job,” said the customer. “Have another on me then,” the bartender offers. “No thanks, if the first 3 didn’t get the taste out of my mouth, another won’t help.” ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2017, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/three-reindeer-walk-into-a-bar/805108/43 "2017-12-23T21:55:02Z")
Sixteen sodium atoms walk into a bar, followed by Batman. ---
**Author:** ![Morgenstern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Morgenstern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgenstern)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2017, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/three-reindeer-walk-into-a-bar/805108/44 "2017-12-23T21:56:56Z")
Batman asks the bartender if he’s seen Robin today. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2017, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/three-reindeer-walk-into-a-bar/805108/45 "2017-12-23T22:17:09Z")
As is traditional, the night after Christmas. Santa’s reindeer went into town for a night of carousing. All but Donner walked into the nearest bar. Donner, meanwhile, went down the street to a place he saw on _Diners, Drive-ins and Dives_ where they serve reindeer. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2017, 10:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/three-reindeer-walk-into-a-bar/805108/46 "2017-12-23T22:26:24Z")
It’s good, really solid stuff. Just a couple of notes: I don’t think brandy is typically used to polish wood, and maybe the twist could be that the third reindeer wants to have sex with his mother? Eh, you know, use it or don’t, I don’t care… ---
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2017, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/three-reindeer-walk-into-a-bar/805108/47 "2017-12-23T22:30:53Z")
Oedipus? Oedipus? I said, “Fesitivus!” Yeah. You’re right. Idunno. ---
**Author:** ![Aspidistra](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aspidistra/32/3894_2.png) [@Aspidistra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aspidistra)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2017, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/three-reindeer-walk-into-a-bar/805108/48 "2017-12-23T22:35:10Z")
> [@JackieLikesVariety](#): > > some of y’all are making me 😛 > > some will need to work on it :mad: Dopers are always up for an excuse to mess around. And now he’s given us free rein, dear. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2017, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/three-reindeer-walk-into-a-bar/805108/49 "2017-12-23T22:45:16Z")
A bear walks up to a bar. The bar says “Hey, watch out for that asshole Crockett.” ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2017, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/three-reindeer-walk-into-a-bar/805108/50 "2017-12-23T22:50:19Z")
I liked the ‘Donner’ one. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2017, 10:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/three-reindeer-walk-into-a-bar/805108/51 "2017-12-23T22:54:47Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > I liked the ‘Donner’ one. Everybody loves a good Donner party. (Except for Donder, the reindeer, for some reason.) ---
**Author:** ![Slash1972](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slash1972/32/6461_2.png) [@Slash1972](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slash1972)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2017, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/three-reindeer-walk-into-a-bar/805108/52 "2017-12-24T00:10:45Z")
> [@cochrane](#): > > A bear walks into a bar and says, “Pour me a beer…please.” The bartender says, “Sure. But what’s with the big pause?” The bear says, “I was born with them. Don’t make me use them on you.” _clap_ ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2017, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/three-reindeer-walk-into-a-bar/805108/53 "2017-12-24T00:41:59Z")
> [@Darren\_Garrison](#): > > Everybody loves a good Donner party. > > (Except for Donder, the reindeer, for some reason.) Good catch there, I thought it may have been misspelled, I still like it. And your addition made me laugh out loud!! ---
**Author:** ![Lucas\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lucas_jackson/32/303_2.png) [@Lucas\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucas_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2017, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/three-reindeer-walk-into-a-bar/805108/54 "2017-12-24T00:42:37Z")
A bear walks into a bar and says, “Pour me a beer…please.” The bartender says, “Why the long face?” ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2017, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/three-reindeer-walk-into-a-bar/805108/55 "2017-12-24T00:53:54Z")
> [@Tim\_R.Mortiss](#): > > A grasshopper walked into a bar. The bartender says, “Hey, we have a drink named after you!” > > The grasshopper says, “Herman?” This is my favorite. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2017, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/three-reindeer-walk-into-a-bar/805108/56 "2017-12-24T01:16:21Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > Good catch there, I thought it may have been misspelled, I still like it. And your addition made me laugh out loud!! Apparently there is a controversy over Dunder, Donder, and Donner. (Somebody make a poll!) ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2017, 1:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/three-reindeer-walk-into-a-bar/805108/57 "2017-12-24T01:30:08Z")
> [@Darren\_Garrison](#): > > Apparently there is a controversy over Dunder, Donder, and Donner. (Somebody make a poll!) I’ve heard all three though I grew up with “Donner”. The lyrics of\* [Rudolph, The Red-Nosed Reindeer\*](http://www.metrolyrics.com/rudolph-the-red-nosed-reindeer-lyrics-christmas-carols.html) back me up. > [@](#): > > You know Dasher and Dancer and Prancer and Vixen, > you know Comet and Cupid and Donner and Blitzen, > But do you recall > The most famous reindeer of all 😉 ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2017, 1:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/three-reindeer-walk-into-a-bar/805108/58 "2017-12-24T01:40:28Z")
Have you heard the story of how the angel got on top of the Christmas tree? Long ago, Santa Claus was having his worst Christmas ever. The elves were on strike. The toys he had outsourced to China were of such poor quality, they had to be returned. Rudolph had a sinus infection, and three other reindeer had been arrested for drinking eggnog while driving an unlicensed sleigh. Worst of all, Mrs. Claus had just told Santa that she was having an affair with the Easter Bunny, and she wanted a separation. It was all too much to take, and Santa was so angry that he was about to hit the roof. At that exact moment, the angel walked into the workshop, carrying the Christmas tree. The angel said: “Hey, Santa! I’ve got the Christmas tree. Where do you want me to stick it?” …and that’s how the angel got on top of the Christmas tree. ---
**Author:** ![j666](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/9de0a6/32.png) [@j666](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/j666)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2017, 2:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/three-reindeer-walk-into-a-bar/805108/59 "2017-12-24T02:28:13Z")
> [@Aspidistra](#): > > Three reindeer walk into a bar. > > You’d think the third one would have seen it. > [@cochrane](#): > > Sixteen sodium atoms walk into a bar, followed by Batman. These made me laugh. ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2017, 3:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/three-reindeer-walk-into-a-bar/805108/60 "2017-12-24T03:04:13Z")
Donner always knows how to liven up a party. 😃 ETA: That’s what I get for not refreshing the page before I post. :o [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/three-reindeer-walk-into-a-bar/805108.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/three-reindeer-walk-into-a-bar/805108.md?page=4)