I used to be an on-time or early kind of gal, but 13 years of my chronically late boyfriend has largely cured me of that. Like Lezlers, I just had to decide what was more important to me - being on time, or being with him. It was a pretty easy choice. Nowadays, I have to add in a job that always runs overtime, and I end up always being late. Fortunately, most of my friends are as terribly overscheduled as I am, so it’s not a big deal for anyone.
My usual solution is to only meet people in a place where everyone will be comfortable and supplied with beverages while waiting - an apartment, coffeehouse, bar, or whatever. That way, noone’s waiting on a cold street corner while I’m frantically trying to get some experiment wrapped up.
For me, it’s not a control thing at all. I feel like a complete idiot being late all the time, but there’s a lot of things in my life that I can’t control the timing of. If I want to be absolutely sure to be on time, I need to set aside hours as a buffer in front of an appointment. I simply can’t afford to do that every time I want to have dinner with a friend. So, I hope that the pleasure of seeing me is offset by the (hopefully mild) annoyance of me being variably late, and I make sure that the annoyance is minimized by careful selecting venues to meet at.
mischievous