# Times you REALLY need a man.... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 1, 2001, 2:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/times-you-really-need-a-man/96242 "2001-12-01T02:29:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![P.W.Doodle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f14d63/32.png) [@P.W.Doodle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/P.W.Doodle)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 2:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/times-you-really-need-a-man/96242/1 "2001-12-01T02:29:02Z")
Tonight is one of those times!! I have a Christmas tree that I need to put in it’s stand, but, I need a hand saw!! Men normally have those…I don’t! I mean, I have the usual hammer, screw drivers, screws, nails, [sub]the screws and nails are in my **doo-dad** tin[/sub] and other assorted goodies. Oh yeah…I do have a shovel…but, I don’t have the other essential “tools”. Oh, I need a man with tools!!! On a more sentimental kick…it would be nice to have someone to share the moment with!! \*[sub]I am not gonna get depressed…I’m not gonna get depressed \*[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 2:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/times-you-really-need-a-man/96242/2 "2001-12-01T02:30:24Z")
Women. They’re only after our tools. ---
**Author:** ![P.W.Doodle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f14d63/32.png) [@P.W.Doodle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/P.W.Doodle)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 2:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/times-you-really-need-a-man/96242/3 "2001-12-01T02:34:17Z")
I finally remembered to “click on” the **Show Signatures** option and it didn’t work!!! And then I remembered… There was a thread or two that discussed the fact it didn’t work on the first post! Oh well!! ::rolleyes:: [sub]Oh, I think I like my rolling eyes smiley w/ the bald head and earrings!![/sub] ---
**Author:** ![P.W.Doodle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f14d63/32.png) [@P.W.Doodle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/P.W.Doodle)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 2:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/times-you-really-need-a-man/96242/4 "2001-12-01T02:36:38Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Larry Mudd \* > \*\*Women. They’re only after our tools. \*\* Do you have what I need?? When can you get here?? ---
**Author:** ![Lsura](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7993a0/32.png) [@Lsura](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lsura)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/times-you-really-need-a-man/96242/5 "2001-12-01T02:49:25Z")
mmmmm…men with tools. _drool_ ---
**Author:** ![whistlepig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/73ab20/32.png) [@whistlepig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whistlepig)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/times-you-really-need-a-man/96242/6 "2001-12-01T04:41:44Z")
A real man would look at you and say, “Gotta a bread knife?” Either that or he’d use his LeatherMan. (Did that last part sound kind of gay to anyone else?) And if I was, there, I’d go get the tree saw I carry in my truck. And then we’d share the moment. ---
**Author:** ![techchick68](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ea5d25/32.png) [@techchick68](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/techchick68)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 4:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/times-you-really-need-a-man/96242/7 "2001-12-01T04:48:51Z")
Sheesh, wimpy women, I own plenty of tools. Ladies, STOP THE INSANITY, you can have tools. Sheesh. I have a power drill, 2 squares, a 6 foot level, a 3 foot level, a hand saw (yes I do,) a full kit with socket thingies, power screwdriver along with various other screw drivers, etc… I wouldn’t mind a plumbing wrench though. You never know when you might need one. Now, the times you need a man around are for: 1. Heterosexual sex 2. Pick up dog poop 3. Snuggle with on a cold night 4. Snuggle with before the fire 5. …lost my train of thought ---
**Author:** ![Silver\_Fire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e4f/32.png) [@Silver\_Fire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Fire)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/times-you-really-need-a-man/96242/8 "2001-12-01T05:09:04Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by P.W. Doodle \* > **There was a thread or two that discussed the fact it didn’t work on the first post!** Well, that’s just plain not true. [OP including sig.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=91679) The thing is, if you click “Show Signature” and then preview, you have to click it again before you submit. I dunno why… ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 5:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/times-you-really-need-a-man/96242/9 "2001-12-01T05:49:04Z")
Placing bets on when **Esprix** sees the thread title and shows up in here? I’m giving 2:1 on “within the hour.” Tonight I’m in my apartment studying. [sub]OK, OK, fine, I was taking a 10 minute break and playing that damn online golf game I saw in another thread, but I was _really_ close to finishing up and getting back to studying.[/sub] when I heard a knock on my door. I wasn’t expecting anyone though. I open the door and it’s the really-cute-Indian-girl-from-upstairs[sup]TM[/sup]. She’s with her mom and they desperately need my help. See, they bought a table from someplace, probably Home Depot, and had it loaded in the car. They got it home, took it out of the car, and it was WAY heavier than they thought. So they needed someone to help get it back in the car for them. They were just going to have me lift it back into the car and then they’d call some of her friends to take it up to her apartment. I lifted it up to put it in the car and realized it wasn’t _that_ heavy, so I offered to save them a step and took it upstairs for them. She’s eternally grateful and everyone’s happy. She’s also boyfriended, naturally. Not that I did this to score points or anything, but, well, you know… Anyway, I don’t have tools, but I guess my arms work just fine. ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 6:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/times-you-really-need-a-man/96242/10 "2001-12-01T06:48:32Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by techchick68 \* > \*\*Sheesh, wimpy women, I own plenty of tools. > > Ladies, STOP THE INSANITY, you can have tools. Sheesh. > > I have a power drill, 2 squares, a 6 foot level, a 3 foot level, a hand saw (yes I do,) a full kit with socket thingies, power screwdriver along with various other screw drivers, etc… > > I wouldn’t mind a plumbing wrench though. \*\* Mmmm. A woman with tools and who knows how to use them. [Insert really cool flirtly line here cause I can’t think of one at the moment.] ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 6:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/times-you-really-need-a-man/96242/11 "2001-12-01T06:58:13Z")
> [@](#): > > I wouldn’t mind a plumbing wrench though. You never know when you might need one. I thought at first techchick said she wanted a plumbing wench. I’ll admit I was intrigued by the idea, but it seemed incongruous with the list that followed. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 7:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/times-you-really-need-a-man/96242/12 "2001-12-01T07:10:13Z")
I get strange looks from my guy when I say I want one of those little sander things for Christmas (you know, the ones that they advertise on tv - they sand into really small places, cut off nails, etc.). I’m not sure if he’s looking at me with bridled passion, or just thinking I’m strange. Oh well, he’s known for a long time that I’m not like the other girls. ::D: ---
**Author:** ![Weirddave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/919ad9/32.png) [@Weirddave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weirddave)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 7:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/times-you-really-need-a-man/96242/13 "2001-12-01T07:14:34Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by techchick68 \* > \*\*I have a power drill, 2 squares, a 6 foot level, a 3 foot level, a hand saw (yes I do,) a full kit with socket thingies, power screwdriver along with various other screw drivers, etc… > > (underlines mine) > \*\* Sorry, techie, you had me until this point, I was ready to propose. Socket _ **thingies???** _ Bleh! ;););););)😛 ---
**Author:** ![celestina](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/258eb7/32.png) [@celestina](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/celestina)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 7:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/times-you-really-need-a-man/96242/14 "2001-12-01T07:15:52Z")
I REALLY need a man to: 1–respect me 2–be intelligent 3–snuggle, cuddle, and just in general be VERY naughty with 😉 4–pamper me even sillier than I already am 5–father and help raise any kids I want to have 6–lift heavy things 7–take out the trash 8–clean up the house 9–do the laundry 10–cook dinner 11–fix things that break 12–protect me from harm 13–explain what goes on in men’s minds ---
**Author:** ![celestina](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/258eb7/32.png) [@celestina](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/celestina)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 7:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/times-you-really-need-a-man/96242/15 "2001-12-01T07:18:46Z")
1. give me a massage 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 7:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/times-you-really-need-a-man/96242/16 "2001-12-01T07:24:59Z")
No, no, no - that’s for when you really need a DYKE. _{hides from **andygirl** }_ Esprix ---
**Author:** ![techchick68](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ea5d25/32.png) [@techchick68](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/techchick68)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 7:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/times-you-really-need-a-man/96242/17 "2001-12-01T07:35:33Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Weirddave \* > Sorry, techie, you had me until this point, I was ready to propose. Socket _ **thingies???** _ Bleh! > > ;););););)😛 \*\* I couldn’t remember what the thingies are called that snap into the socket wrench, half are metric and half are US. I know that much…I am still all woman silly. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![andygirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a9adbd/32.png) [@andygirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andygirl)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 7:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/times-you-really-need-a-man/96242/18 "2001-12-01T07:43:13Z")
Esprix, don’t make me hurt you with my jigsaw and power drill. And I’m not speaking metaphorically. \ ---
**Author:** ![LittleTigger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/58956e/32.png) [@LittleTigger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LittleTigger)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 7:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/times-you-really-need-a-man/96242/19 "2001-12-01T07:54:01Z")
Well thats me out, 8 I can’t do as well as other people but I tried anyway, but Tammy never Never cristicised me for it, she accepted what I could do and helped me with the rest. But 13, is impossible for me because I don’t understand the Bob Normal way of thinking. I did these things for Tammy when she was still living, as her handicap limited her more than mine does. 1,2,5,6,7,8,9, I do anyway, 10 is my fave because she really Loved spaghetti so I made her that alot with fresh mushrooms. 11 is my job, although I wish I were working again, dam employers all just have their heads up their butts these days, they don’t know a good honest hard working boy when they see one, but I fix vcrs and tv’s and computers at home anyway because its fun to fix things anyway. 12 is simple when you know how to make laser weapons. And 3 she usually asked of me anyway so I knew when she wanted to smooch, (having a heatstroke can really make you a poor guesser and at times it makes you clueless.) As long as I don’t have to watch boring football or drink yucky beer I should be ok. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by celestina \* > \*\*I REALLY need a man to: > > 1–respect me > 2–be intelligent > 3–snuggle, cuddle, and just in general be VERY naughty with 😉 > 4–pamper me even sillier than I already am > 5–father and help raise any kids I want to have > 6–lift heavy things > 7–take out the trash > 8–clean up the house > 9–do the laundry > 10–cook dinner > 11–fix things that break > 12–protect me from harm > 13–explain what goes on in men’s minds \*\* ---
**Author:** ![BoiToi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/d26b3c/32.png) [@BoiToi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BoiToi)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2001, 8:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/times-you-really-need-a-man/96242/20 "2001-12-01T08:52:00Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by celestina \* > \*\*I REALLY need a man to: > > 1–respect me > 2–be intelligent > 3–snuggle, cuddle, and just in general be VERY naughty with 😉 > 4–pamper me even sillier than I already am > 5–father and help raise any kids I want to have > 6–lift heavy things > 7–take out the trash > 8–clean up the house > 9–do the laundry > 10–cook dinner > 11–fix things that break > 12–protect me from harm > 13–explain what goes on in men’s minds \*\* Do you REALLY want a gay man? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/times-you-really-need-a-man/96242.md?page=2)