# Tipping...Am I a weird duck? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [March 30, 2010, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tipping-am-i-a-weird-duck/534339 "2010-03-30T15:53:08Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Peremensoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ce7236/32.png) [@Peremensoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peremensoe)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2010, 5:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tipping-am-i-a-weird-duck/534339/81 "2010-04-17T05:51:28Z")
Christmas–or other holiday, or just annual or periodical–gifts aren’t really the same thing as _tips_, which are offered in conjunction with the performance of a specific service at that moment. But I’m generally in favor of both. ---
**Author:** ![Peremensoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ce7236/32.png) [@Peremensoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peremensoe)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2010, 6:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tipping-am-i-a-weird-duck/534339/82 "2010-04-17T06:02:29Z")
> [@Novelty\_Bobble](#): > > Personally I find that tipping cultures like the US lead to bad behaviours. The overbearing service in the US is extremely off putting. I much prefer Japan where it is much more low key. If I found the service to be “overbearing,” that would mean it was less than ideal service and therefore would not merit so much of a tip. The only tip-related practice that I find intolerable, and will avoid at all costs, is the one that, I suppose, **Novelty Bobble** would appreciate: when a “tip” of a fixed percentage is _automatically_ added to the bill before the customer even sees it. Forget that. Tips are for _quality of service_, and nobody but me is going to place a value on the service I receive. ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2010, 6:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tipping-am-i-a-weird-duck/534339/83 "2010-04-17T06:08:21Z")
I only tip the people who rely on tips for pay… not because I’m a cheapskate, but because I’m fucking poor. I would be putting cash into the hands of everyone who regularly performed services for me if: A.) I was rich. B.) I was in the mafia. ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2010, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tipping-am-i-a-weird-duck/534339/84 "2010-04-19T20:03:10Z")
> [@spark240](#): > > The only tip-related practice that I find intolerable, and will avoid at all costs, is the one that, I suppose, **Novelty Bobble** would appreciate: when a “tip” of a fixed percentage is _automatically_ added to the bill before the customer even sees it. Forget that. Tips are for _quality of service_, and nobody but me is going to place a value on the service I receive. The only time I see that happen is in some restaurants, where an automatic 18% tip will be added to parties of a minimum size (usually six or more). Now, while this is less than ideal, it’s one of the few ways to prevent waitstaff from being completely screwed out of an expected part of their income, from people like those who pop up in these threads, who don’t understand how to live in society. Note that I have \*never \*heard of a case where someone received poor service and was not able to change the value of (or completely remove) that “mandatory” tip after talking to a manager or supervisor. ---
**Author:** ![Neptunian\_Slug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ce7236/32.png) [@Neptunian\_Slug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Neptunian_Slug)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2010, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tipping-am-i-a-weird-duck/534339/85 "2010-04-19T20:15:59Z")
> [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > The only time I see that happen is in some restaurants, where an automatic 18% tip will be added to parties of a minimum size (usually six or more). Now, while this is less than ideal, it’s one of the few ways to prevent waitstaff from being completely screwed out of an expected part of their income, from people like those who pop up in these threads, who don’t understand how to live in society. Note that I have \*never \*heard of a case where someone received poor service and was not able to change the value of (or completely remove) that “mandatory” tip after talking to a manager or supervisor. I saw a few places in South Beach and one or two in Vegas that slapped on an automatic tip on all parties regardless of size. the waitress at one place informed me rather diplomatically that they had to because some visitors from abroad tended to stiff the staff. If you complained, you were certainly entitled to have some of it taken off. ---
**Author:** ![Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/96bed5/32.png) [@Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Patty_O_Furniture)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2010, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tipping-am-i-a-weird-duck/534339/86 "2010-04-19T20:34:41Z")
> [@Siam\_Sam](#): > > I am SO grateful I live in a non-tipping society. And I love visiting your so-called non-tipping society because the wait staff and hair stylists seem absolutely overjoyed when I leave the change (usually 10-20 baht) on the table instead of taking it with me. Those cabbies on the other hand are starting to expect that us westerners are going to tip. I usually end up rounding up to the nearest 10. > [@](#): > > I also tip delivery drivers (pizza, etc.) pretty well. My hope is that this gets communicated back at the pizza place, and that they wind up making me first on the delivery run. It does seem to help…my food often arrives well before the estimated time. So you’re the reason my pizza is always late! ---
**Author:** ![jasonh300](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/46a35a/32.png) [@jasonh300](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jasonh300)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2010, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tipping-am-i-a-weird-duck/534339/87 "2010-04-19T23:33:19Z")
> [@kenobi\_65](#): > > I also tip delivery drivers (pizza, etc.) pretty well. My hope is that this gets communicated back at the pizza place, and that they wind up making me first on the delivery run. It does seem to help…my food often arrives well before the estimated time. When I delivered pizza, everyone knew who tipped well and who didn’t tip and on a busy night, when we were delivering 5+ orders on a run, the deliveries were dropped off in the order of who tipped the best. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2010, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tipping-am-i-a-weird-duck/534339/88 "2010-04-20T00:16:37Z")
> [@kidneyfailure](#): > > Actually it’s more like YOU’RE happy and the waitress/bellhop/etc is saying to him/herself, “Thanks for not giving me a tip, you cheap asshole. A little really does go a long way for people like me, but you never even thought of that, did you? Nope, you didn’t, because you’re a self-centered prick.” > > At least, that’s what I would think. Give 'em a few extra bucks, for chrissakes. What’s the harm? You feel they didn’t earn your extra five bucks or something? The harm is that you are expecting something without actually telling the person. If they don’t respond properly to your expectation, you get miffed. But you have no right to be miffed for what you didn’t ask for. You’re creating bad feelings in yourself. Furthermore, notice how oft tipped people now get lower wages? Yip, that’s because of the tipping system. Before people had to pay enough for you to get payed enough to live on. Now they don’t. Before, you didn’t have to worry about non-tippers, now you do. Again, you’re life is net unhappier because of the system in place. The only people who come out on top are the people who don’t tip, or do so rarely. They’re the only ones who are actually financially better off. I think the entire system was created by these people to get lower prices on the menu. They have everyone else subsidize them. Those media stories about people being kicked out: Yeah, they’re rare. That crap about people spitting or otherwise ruining your food–likewise rare. Most of the time non-tippers get by just fine. And leaving the tippers to make up the difference. ---
**Author:** ![Peremensoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ce7236/32.png) [@Peremensoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peremensoe)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2010, 4:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tipping-am-i-a-weird-duck/534339/89 "2010-04-20T04:19:15Z")
> [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > The only time I see that happen is in some restaurants, where an automatic 18% tip will be added to parties of a minimum size (usually six or more). I’ve seen small-print menu notes warning of an automatic 20% for a party of five or more. At least they gave a warning. I’m been told some folks’ first notice was on the credit receipt, _after_ the card was swiped. I personally often tip more than 20% (for excellent service, of course–_especially_ at cheaper places where 20% of the bill isn’t much, and the waitress probably could use it). Groups I’ve been in may tip _better still_, given the dynamic of everybody throwing a bunch of money on the table and not worrying much about precise shares. (I do understand that this dynamic, which is part of what we like to call “having a good time with friends at a good restaurant,” is mysterious to some.) > [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > Now, while this is less than ideal, it’s one of the few ways to prevent waitstaff from being completely screwed out of an expected part of their income, from people like those who pop up in these threads, who don’t understand how to live in society. That may well be true… but wouldn’t it be equally true (for “those” people) in groups smaller than five/six? ---
**Author:** ![Peremensoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ce7236/32.png) [@Peremensoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peremensoe)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2010, 4:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tipping-am-i-a-weird-duck/534339/90 "2010-04-20T04:29:36Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > The harm is that you are expecting something without actually telling the person. If they don’t respond properly to your expectation, you get miffed. But you have no right to be miffed for what you didn’t ask for. So you never say or do anything for anyone else that they haven’t specifically asked you for? :rolleyes: > [@BigT](#): > > The only people who come out on top are the people who don’t tip, or do so rarely. They’re the only ones who are actually financially better off. There are more ways to be “on top” than financially. ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2010, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tipping-am-i-a-weird-duck/534339/91 "2010-04-20T15:18:41Z")
> [@spark240](#): > > That may well be true… but wouldn’t it be equally true (for “those” people) in groups smaller than five/six? Yes, it would, but people really hate the idea of mandatory tips. So, my WAG is that they let it slide in smaller parties, where the waitstaff can more afford to lose the income. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2010, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tipping-am-i-a-weird-duck/534339/92 "2010-04-22T18:42:55Z")
> [@Patty\_O\_Furniture](#): > > And I love visiting your so-called non-tipping society because the wait staff and hair stylists seem absolutely overjoyed when I leave the change (usually 10-20 baht) on the table instead of taking it with me. > > Those cabbies on the other hand are starting to expect that us westerners are going to tip. I usually end up rounding up to the nearest 10. Yes, those are the tipping exceptions here. Rounding up to the next 10 for taxis, or the next 100 if it’s to the airport. (But never FROM the airport if it’s a public taxi, because you’re already paying a 50-baht surcharge.) And at smaller eateries, the kind that give you your change on a steel platter, it’s common to leave the coins, because doing otherwise means you’re such a money-grubber that you have to pick up every last baht. (Larger places that charge a service fee should never be tipped.) If they hand the change to you, it is customary not to leave anything. Many of the bars have started giving 50 baht or more of the change back in coins in hopes you’ll leave it all as a tip. I never pay those places a second visit. If you can understand enough Thai, you soon hear that their “overjoy” is often derisive laughter at the stupid foreigner who is so much of a wastrel with his money. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Ibanez](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/a4c791/32.png) [@Ibanez](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ibanez)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2010, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tipping-am-i-a-weird-duck/534339/93 "2010-04-22T21:08:52Z")
I wouldn’t tip the teacher, I’m suprised giving them gifts is allowed. Some people have commented the amount you tip your paperboy was too much for x-mas. I had a route back in the late 80’s when I was a kid. A average x-mas tip back then was $20 some customers would give me a little moe. I think $50 is a pretty nice tip for him at x-mas, he’ll never miss your house. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tipping-am-i-a-weird-duck/534339.md?page=4)