# To all Bob Rivers fans out there: HAYLP!!!! **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 4, 2000, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-all-bob-rivers-fans-out-there-haylp/43901 "2000-12-04T04:12:57Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 3\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Uniball](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Uniball](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uniball)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2000, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-all-bob-rivers-fans-out-there-haylp/43901/1 "2000-12-04T04:12:57Z")
I have a buncha MP3 of this guy, and a problem: I cannot identify, or in some times remember, the songs he’s making fun of. Can you help me, pwetty pwease with sugar on top? Here’s the list of songs I don’t know/remember the original names: Bob Rivers - Antidepressants 1.732 KB Bob Rivers - Bowel Moves 2.533 KB Bob Rivers - Buy A Truck 2.385 KB Bob Rivers - By The Time I Get The Meat Axe 1.777 KB Bob Rivers - Cirrhosis Of The Liver 1.330 KB Bob Rivers - Dead Dog Rover 1.084 KB Bob Rivers - Death By Misadventure 2.989 KB Bob Rivers - Foreigners 2.009 KB Bob Rivers - Getting Fatter All The Time 1.326 KB Bob Rivers - He’s Alive (Elvis) 2.016 KB Bob Rivers - I Came Upon A Roadkill Deer 2.834 KB Bob Rivers - Ignorant Man 2.880 KB Bob Rivers - I’m A Weight Watcher 1.242 KB Bob Rivers - I’m Just A Singer In A Holiday Inn 1.170 KB Bob Rivers - Jesus’s Birthday 2.393 KB Bob Rivers - Kennedy The Letch 981 KB Bob Rivers - One Toke Under the Bench 1.692 KB Bob Rivers - Pick My Nose Again 1.620 KB Bob Rivers - Pokemon 1.445 KB Bob Rivers - Rap’s Not Even Music 1.841 KB Bob Rivers - Sorry We Boned Ya (AOL) 1.632 KB Bob Rivers - Spinning Reel 1.750 KB Bob Rivers - Stinkin’ Up My Backyard 1.655 KB Bob Rivers - The Ayala Song 2.274 KB Bob Rivers - The Magical Kingdom Of Claus 5.518 KB Bob Rivers - The Nafta Song 2.132 KB Bob Rivers - The No Smoking Song 2.072 KB Bob Rivers - The Restroom Door Said Gentlemen 1.476 KB Bob Rivers - Three Inch Tool 2.008 KB Bob Rivers - Walkin Round In Womens Underwear 1.821 KB Bob Rivers - Whitewater 2.428 KB Bob Rivers - Who Blew That Smell 1.694 KB And to help others, here’s the ones I DID identifyed. > [@](#): > > Bob Rivers - A Big Ton O’ Moola (parody of The Lion King’s Hakuna Matata) 1.975 KB > Bob Rivers - A Letter To Santa 2.523 KB > Bob Rivers - A President Who’s Black (parody of Rolling Stones’ Paint it Black) 1.296 KB > Bob Rivers - A Salute To Breasts (parody of The Name Game) 1.287 KB > Bob Rivers - A Visit from St Nicholson (parody of Twas the Night Before Christmas) 4.258 KB > Bob Rivers - Acid Rain (parody of Beatles’ Penny Lane) 1.190 KB > Bob Rivers - All You Need Is Elves (parody of Beatles’ All You Need Is Love) 2.770 KB > Bob Rivers - American Pie Eulogy (parody of Don McLean’s American Pie) 3.412 KB > Bob Rivers - Antidepressants 1.732 KB > Bob Rivers - Baby Madonna (parody of Beatles’ Lady Madonna) 2.014 KB > Bob Rivers - Beat Up Old Jetliner (parody of Steve Miller Band) 2.189 KB > Bob Rivers - Beaver Fever (parody of Fever) 1.936 KB > Bob Rivers - Big Hairs of Lynn Wood (parody of Warren Zevon’s Werewolves of London) 2.446 KB > Bob Rivers - Bisexual (parody of Queen’s Bicycle Race) 1.863 KB > Bob Rivers - Bomb Iraq (parody of The Bird is the Word) 1.421 KB > Bob Rivers - Bosnia (parody of The Doors’ Gloria) 1.372 KB > Bob Rivers - Bowel Moves 2.533 KB > Bob Rivers - Burning Down The Church (parody of Talking Heads’ Burning Down The House) 1.253 KB > Bob Rivers - Buttafuco (parody of Heart’s Barracuda) 1.776 KB > Bob Rivers - ButtCracker Suite (parody of Nutcracker Suite) 3.813 KB > Bob Rivers - Buy A Truck 2.385 KB > Bob Rivers - By The Time I Get The Meat Axe 1.777 KB > Bob Rivers - Cane ‘Em Good (parody of Devo’s Whip It) 1.716 KB > Bob Rivers - Cats In The Kettle (parody of Cat Stevens’ Cats in the Cradle) 1.511 KB > Bob Rivers - Chipmunks Roasting On An Open Fire (parody of Nat King Cole’s Chestnuts Roasting On An Open Fire) 3.114 KB > Bob Rivers - Cirrhosis Of The Liver 1.330 KB > Bob Rivers - Clean The Aquarium (parody of Hair’s Aquarius) 2.577 KB > Bob Rivers - Clean The Catbox (parody of The Clash’s Rock the Casbah) 2.329 KB > Bob Rivers - Clintons Tush 1.182 KB > Bob Rivers - Connie Chung (parody of Jethro Tull’s Aqualung) 1.591 KB > Bob Rivers - Connie, Do You Wanna Know A Secret (parody of Beatles) 1.331 KB > Bob Rivers - Cows With Guns 4.897 KB > Bob Rivers - Crypto (parody of Harry Belafonte’s Day-O) 1.548 KB > Bob Rivers - Dark Side Of Naboo (parody of Pink Floyd’s Dark Side of the Moon) 2.706 KB > Bob Rivers - Dead Dog Rover 1.084 KB > Bob Rivers - Death By Misadventure 2.989 KB > Bob Rivers - Dirty Deeds Done With Sheep (parody of AC DC’s Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap) 3.017 KB > Bob Rivers - Do The Chinese Love Their Children (parody of Sting’s Russians) 1.788 KB > Bob Rivers - Dole Fan (parody of Soul Man) 2.674 KB > Bob Rivers - Don’t Put Out This Turd (parody of Beatles’ Free As A Bird) 2.022 KB > Bob Rivers - Dr Jack (parody of The Who’s Happy Jack) 1.396 KB > Bob Rivers - Driving With Mr. Magoo (parody of Janis Joplin’s Me And Bobby McGee) 2.750 KB > Bob Rivers - For Those Who Bombed Iraq (parody of AC DC’s For Those About to Rock) 1.852 KB > Bob Rivers - Foreigners 2.009 KB > Bob Rivers - Getting Fatter All The Time 1.326 KB > Bob Rivers - Ghosts in White Linen (parody of Moody Blues’ Nights in White Satin) 1.102 KB > Bob Rivers - Grahbe Yahbalz (parody of Deck the Halls) 1.070 KB > Bob Rivers - Grampa Loved the Rolling Stones (parody of Papa Was a Rolling Stone) 2.815 KB > Bob Rivers - Gump (parody of Van Halen’s Jump) 1.632 KB > Bob Rivers - He’s Alive (Elvis) 2.016 KB > Bob Rivers - Holidaze (S’cuze Me, I Got Gifts To Buy) (Parody of Jimi Hendrix’s Purple Haze) 2.969 KB > Bob Rivers - I Am Santa Claus (parody of Black Sabbath’s Iron Man) 3.157 KB > Bob Rivers - I Came Upon A Roadkill Deer 2.834 KB > Bob Rivers - I Don’t Have Hair Anymore (parody of Phil Collins’ I Don’t Care Anymore) 1.418 KB > Bob Rivers - I Fought The Lawn (parody of Bobby Fuller’s I Fought the Law) 1.414 KB > Bob Rivers - I Used To Rock And Roll All Night (parody of Kiss’ Rock’n’Roll All Nite) 2.742 KB > Bob Rivers - I Want My MP3 (parody of Dire Straits’ Money For Nothing) 1.859 KB > Bob Rivers - Ignorant Man 2.880 KB > Bob Rivers - I’m A Weight Watcher 1.242 KB > Bob Rivers - I’m Just A Singer In A Holiday Inn 1.170 KB > Bob Rivers - Inflatable Woman (parody of Guess Who’s American Woman) 2.578 KB > Bob Rivers - Jesus’s Birthday 2.393 KB > Bob Rivers - Kennedy The Letch 981 KB > Bob Rivers - Little Hummer Girl (parody of Little Drummer Boy) 2.112 KB > Bob Rivers - Livin’ La Vida Yoda (parody of Ricky Martin’s Living La Vida Loca) 3.650 KB > Bob Rivers - Love In The Oval Office (parody of Aerosmith’s Love In an Elevator) 1.635 KB > Bob Rivers - Mad Cow Disease (parody of Dire Straits’ Industrial Disease) 2.288 KB > Bob Rivers - Martina Navratilova 1.379 KB > Bob Rivers - Media Killed the Royalty Star (parody of Buggles’ Video Killed the Radio Star) 2.169 KB > Bob Rivers - Middle Age Waistline (parody of The Who) 1.594 KB > Bob Rivers - Minimum Wage (parody of Smashing Pumpkins) 1.699 KB > Bob Rivers - O Come All Ye Grateful Dead-Heads 1.009 KB > Bob Rivers - Officer Fuhrman (parody of Beatles’ Eleanor Rigby) 1.028 KB > Bob Rivers - One Toke Under the Bench 1.692 KB > Bob Rivers - Oops, I Farted Again (parody of Britney Spear’s Oops, I Did It Again) 1.700 KB > Bob Rivers - People Get Famous (parody of The Doors’ People Are Strange) 1.277 KB > Bob Rivers - Pick My Nose Again 1.620 KB > Bob Rivers - Please Don’t Shoot Mr. Postman (parody of Beatles’ Please Mr. Postman) 1.289 KB > Bob Rivers - Pokemon 1.445 KB > Bob Rivers - Protection (parody of Aretha Franklin’s Respect) 1.864 KB > Bob Rivers - Prune Juice (parody of The Troggs’ Wild Thing) 1.477 KB > Bob Rivers - Pubic Hair (parody of Hair) 1.056 KB > Bob Rivers - Rap’s Not Even Music 1.841 KB > Bob Rivers - Read It In The Tabloids (parody of Creedence Clearwarter Revival’s I Heard It Through The Grapevine) 1.522 KB > Bob Rivers - River of Pee (parody of Billy Joel’s River of Dreams) 2.623 KB > Bob Rivers - Rummy Rocker Boy (parody of Bing Crosby and David Bowie’s Little Drummer Boy) 3.791 KB > Bob Rivers - School’s Out Of Ammo (parody of Alice Cooper’s School’s Out) 2.182 KB > Bob Rivers - Seahawk Fan (parody of Billy Joel) 2.693 KB > Bob Rivers - Seasick Asian Man (parody of Johnny Rivers’ Secret Agent Man) 1.637 KB > Bob Rivers - Shouldn’t Touch This (Pee Wee Herman Song)(parody of MC Hammer’s Can’t Touch This) 872 KB > Bob Rivers - Sled Zeppelin (parody of Led Zeppelin’s D’Yer Maker) 2.476 KB > Bob Rivers - Smells Like Teeny Spirit (parody of Nirvana’s Smells Like Teen Spirit) 2.078 KB > Bob Rivers - Smoke A Bowl (parody of Always Coca Cola) 2.406 KB > Bob Rivers - Sorry We Boned Ya (AOL) 1.632 KB > Bob Rivers - Space Station Oddity (parody of David Bowie’s Space Oddity) 3.082 KB > Bob Rivers - Spinning Reel 1.750 KB > Bob Rivers - Spokane (parody of JJ Cale’s Cocaine) 1.558 KB > Bob Rivers - Star Wars Cantina (parody of Copacabana) 2.316 KB > Bob Rivers - Star Wars Medley 2.612 KB > Bob Rivers - Stinkin’ Up My Backyard 1.655 KB > Bob Rivers - Take A Whack On The U.S. Side (parody of Lou Reed’s Walk on the Wild Side) 3.422 KB > Bob Rivers - The Angel 1.156 KB > Bob Rivers - The Ayala Song 2.274 KB > Bob Rivers - The Devil Went Down to Jamaica (parody of The Devil Went Down to Memphis) 3.169 KB > Bob Rivers - The Dot Coms They Are A Closin (parody of Bob Dylan’s The Times They’re A-Changing) 2.107 KB > Bob Rivers - The Fondler (parody of The Wanderer) 1.915 KB > Bob Rivers - The Girl With Emphysema (parody of The Girl From Ipanema) 2.587 KB > Bob Rivers - The Magical Kingdom Of Claus 5.518 KB > Bob Rivers - The Nafta Song 2.132 KB > Bob Rivers - The No Smoking Song 2.072 KB > Bob Rivers - The Police Stopped My Car (parody of Feliz Navidad) 1.856 KB > Bob Rivers - The Restroom Door Said Gentlemen 1.476 KB > Bob Rivers - The Water Police (parody of Cheap Trick’s The Dream Police) 1.868 KB > Bob Rivers - Them Beans (parody of Alice In Chains’ Them Bones) 1.383 KB > Bob Rivers - This Old Man Is On The Commode (parody of John Fogerty’s Old Man’s Down the Road) 1.697 KB > Bob Rivers - Three Inch Tool 2.008 KB > Bob Rivers - To All The Girls I’ve Fucked Before (parody of Willie Nelson and Julio Iglesias’ To All The Girls I’ve Loved Before) 3.351 KB > Bob Rivers - Tragical Anthem (parody of Stars and Stripes Forever) 1.475 KB > Bob Rivers - Walkin Round In Womens Underwear 1.821 KB > Bob Rivers - We Buy The Tampons (parody of Queen’s We Will Rock You and We Are The Champions) 2.900 KB > Bob Rivers - Weenie In A Bottle (parody of Christina Aguillera’s Genie in A Bottle) 3.222 KB > Bob Rivers - West Seattle Girls (parody of David Lee Roth’s California Girls) 2.587 KB > Bob Rivers - What An Ugly Man He Was (parody of Emerson, Lake & Palmer’s Lucky Man) 3.226 KB > Bob Rivers - What If God Smoked Cannabis (Parody of Joan Osborne’s What If God Was One Of Us) 2.488 KB > Bob Rivers - When Are They Going To Fry OJ (parody of Terence Trent D’Arby) 2.030 KB > Bob Rivers - Whitewater 2.428 KB > Bob Rivers - Who Blew That Smell 1.694 KB > Bob Rivers - Wild Card Fever (parody of Ted Nugent’s Cat Scratch Fever) 2.024 KB > Bob Rivers - Windows 95 Sucks (parody of Rolling Stones’ Start Me Up) 2.033 KB > Bob Rivers - Wrong Foot Amputated (parody of Offspring’s Keep Em Separated) 2.003 KB > Bob Rivers - You’re A Porn Star (parody of Smash Mouth’s All Star) 1.229 KB ---
**Author:** ![screech-owl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/82dd89/32.png) [@screech-owl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/screech-owl)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2000, 1:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-all-bob-rivers-fans-out-there-haylp/43901/2 "2000-12-04T13:19:46Z")
Sure: (can’t find my tapes) Bob Rivers - Dead Dog Rover - _(I’m Looking Over A) Four Leaf Clover_ - no idea Bob Rivers - Foreigners - _Angels We Have Heard On High_ - Traditional Christmas Carol Bob Rivers - I Came Upon A Roadkill Deer - _It Came Upon A Midnight Clear_ - Traditional Christmas Carol Bob Rivers - The Restroom Door Said Gentlemen - _God Rest Ye Merry, Gentlemen_ - Traditional Christmas Carol Bob Rivers - Walkin Round In Womens Underwear - _(Walkin’ In A ) Winter Wonderland_ - Traditional Christmas Carol Pretty Sure: Bob Rivers - The Magical Kingdom Of Claus - _The Wonderful Wizard of Oz_ Complete WAGs: Bob Rivers - Getting Fatter All The Time - _Getting Better All The Time_ - The Beatles Bob Rivers - Spinning Reel - _Spinning Wheel_ - Three Dog Night(?) Bob Rivers - By The Time I Get The Meat Axe - _By The Time I Get To Phoenix_ - Glenn Campbell BTW, I LOVE “I Am Santa Claus” ---
**Author:** ![Spritle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/5daacb/32.png) [@Spritle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spritle)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2000, 1:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-all-bob-rivers-fans-out-there-haylp/43901/3 "2000-12-04T13:36:59Z")
Bob Rivers’ little ditty with the girl singing “There’s something stuck up in the chimney” is my FAV x-mas carol. That and John Pryne’s “Christmas in Prison”. No help in recognizing orig. tunes, I was reading through the list and lost focus. Too long for me. Sorry ☹ “The dog is barking up the chimney flue and we don’t know what we’re gonna do.” God, what lyrics!!