# To Liberal:  I'm not pitting you.. I'm just confused

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-liberal-im-not-pitting-you-im-just-confused/393489>\
**Category:** The BBQ Pit\
**Created:** [February 24, 2007, 7:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-liberal-im-not-pitting-you-im-just-confused/393489 "2007-02-24T07:42:18Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 14

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**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\
**Post date:** [February 25, 2007, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-liberal-im-not-pitting-you-im-just-confused/393489/261 "2007-02-25T23:10:05Z")

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[QUOTE=monstro]  
For me, I find your self-expressed Christian devotion to be at odds with the nastiness of your temper. When you get angry, you go straight for the jugular. Sometimes it seems to come out of nowhere, for very trivial offenses.

Now a number of posters also fly off the handle. Sometimes I _do_ this. But not many of us haven’t painted ourselves as solid exemplers of Christ, as you have. When you wear your principles on your sleeve, you set yourself up for higher levels of scrutinity and stronger kicks to the gut when you fail.

Maybe that’s not nice for us to do, but it’s not unreasonable either, IMHO.

:shrug:  
[/QUOTE]  
But that’s simply not true. On the contrary, I’ve said many times that I fall far short of His example. I have never held myself up as an exemplar of Christ. Were it not for His mercy and grace, I wouldn’t even know He is real. I know that I hurt Him when I hurt others. Now that doesn’t mean that love is soft soap; sometimes “that which edifies” (my definition of what love facilitates) is not pleasant. But I’ve crossed the line many times. And in the garden, I will be the glad servant of those whom I have harmed.

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**Author:** ![Quiddity\_Glomfuster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/c4cdca/32.png) [@Quiddity\_Glomfuster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quiddity_Glomfuster)\
**Post date:** [February 25, 2007, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-liberal-im-not-pitting-you-im-just-confused/393489/262 "2007-02-25T23:10:59Z")

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[QUOTE=EddyTeddyFreddy]  
enlightened Bhuddist perfecto persona  
[/QUOTE]

Hee! That would be a fun user name 😃

> [@](#):
>
> Sometimes I get irritated. This IS allowable for us lesser beings, is it not?

Oh piffle. Cut that out. Even the DL himself said he gets angry 😛 I’m not saying I never do. But it ain’t good for us, so it’s worth trying to prevent where possible. And we ought not be mean even if we’re angry.

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**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\
**Post date:** [February 25, 2007, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-liberal-im-not-pitting-you-im-just-confused/393489/263 "2007-02-25T23:11:52Z")

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[QUOTE=wring]  
For me, personally, it takes quite a bit before I recall postes from prior threads. Once, I posted in a thread that I didn’t recall having cross words w/a particular poster before, and some one ‘helpfully’ linked to a prior exchange. But you know what? I \*\* didnt\*\* recall the exchange. Some folks carry such wounds with them forever, like prized possessions. In most cases, it only serves to continue hurting the one carrying it.  
[/QUOTE]  
You’re absolutely right. Forgivness heals the forgiver.

Interestingly, I discovered today that Twickster had held a similar grudge for a similar long time over something I’d forgotten. That’s just the nature of the thing.

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**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\
**Post date:** [February 25, 2007, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-liberal-im-not-pitting-you-im-just-confused/393489/264 "2007-02-25T23:12:20Z")

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[QUOTE=wring]  
For me, personally, it takes quite a bit before I recall posters from prior threads. Once, I posted in a thread that I didn’t recall having cross words w/a particular poster before, and some one ‘helpfully’ linked to a prior exchange. But you know what? I \*\* didnt\*\* recall the exchange. Some folks carry such wounds with them forever, like prized possessions. In most cases, it only serves to continue hurting the one carrying it.

_fixed typo_  
[/QUOTE]  
Bingo.

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**Author:** ![Quiddity\_Glomfuster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/c4cdca/32.png) [@Quiddity\_Glomfuster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quiddity_Glomfuster)\
**Post date:** [February 25, 2007, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-liberal-im-not-pitting-you-im-just-confused/393489/265 "2007-02-25T23:12:59Z")

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[QUOTE=Jodi]  
So there’s the scoop for ya, **QG**. He said it and he won’t apologize for it. I’ll be interested to see how that fits into your whole despising of meanness and encouragement of warm hearts. :rolleyes:  
[/QUOTE]

Yeah, but I see that he’s saying she’s in the right.

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**Author:** ![Sarahfeena](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sarahfeena/32/519_2.png) [@Sarahfeena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sarahfeena)\
**Post date:** [February 25, 2007, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-liberal-im-not-pitting-you-im-just-confused/393489/266 "2007-02-25T23:18:33Z")

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You know, **Quiddity** , I have been trying to stay out of this fray for the most part, and your participation in this thread exactly illustrates the reason. I am relatively new here…new enough that I don’t know much about **Liberal’s** history (he was on a hiatus I think for my entire time here, until his recent re-entry to the board). I had heard of him, and gathered that he had a real reputation he was dragging around, but didn’t know the details of it. Clearly, based on what I have seen in the last week or so, there is A LOT of water under the bridge between **Liberal** and some of the other long-time posters here, and it seems a little crazy for someone like myself to jump in and start taking sides when I wasn’t around for all this history.

I mean, think about it…wouldn’t it seem a little foolish, as someone who doesn’t know what has gone down over the years, for me to jump in and start pointing fingers at who is being fair and who isn’t? If you want to give **Liberal** the benefit of the doubt, that is great, but why would you not do the same for the other posters, when you don’t even know what is causing the problem? Probably the meanest post I have read here in the past week was the one **Liberal** directed at **EddyTeddyFreddy** , and you seem to want to give him a pass on that. Why?

Look, I really don’t think anyone here cares if you decide you want to be **Liberal’s** best friend. But it seems to me that if someone has come to dislike him, and came upon that dislike honestly over 5 years of conversations on this board, it’s a tad presumptuous for you to come in and say that they shouldn’t feel it.

I also think it’s kind of weird that you would come into the Pit…a forum that seems to be specifically designed for people to get things off their chests with other posters, so that the other forums remain relatively civil…and tell people that it’s inappropriate to get those things off their chests. If you don’t like the way things work in the Pit, seriously, just stay out of it…it’s not worth your own aggravation.

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**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\
**Post date:** [February 25, 2007, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-liberal-im-not-pitting-you-im-just-confused/393489/267 "2007-02-25T23:18:41Z")

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[QUOTE=Liberal]  
You’re absolutely right. Forgivness heals the forgiver.

Interestingly, I discovered today that Twickster had held a similar grudge for a similar long time over something I’d forgotten. That’s just the nature of the thing.  
[/QUOTE]

Yeah but she got pitted only once, for you it is a fairly normal activity. 😃

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**Author:** ![Contrapuntal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e274bd/32.png) [@Contrapuntal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Contrapuntal)\
**Post date:** [February 25, 2007, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-liberal-im-not-pitting-you-im-just-confused/393489/268 "2007-02-25T23:20:16Z")

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[QUOTE=Quiddity Glomfuster]  
Well, no. People ask me a question or in some way expect a response here, do they not?  
[/QUOTE]  
In another thread I repeatedly asked you a question that you refused to answer. Don’t hide behind this “I must reply or be thought rude” bullshit.

Dopers, this one will equivocate and weasel and redefine her terms _ad nauseum_, as you are no doubt beginning to realize.

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**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\
**Post date:** [February 25, 2007, 11:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-liberal-im-not-pitting-you-im-just-confused/393489/269 "2007-02-25T23:24:14Z")

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[QUOTE=EddyTeddyFreddy]  
Wow, you hold grudges that long? However long is it, since I don’t have the faintest idea what you’re on about, whatever seed of antipathy you’re still fertilizing.  
[/QUOTE]  
It’s funny how that works. I don’t know how old you are, but at some point in your life you have come across (or will come across) a circumstance in which something you’ve said to someone made far more of an impression on them than it did on you and vice versa. That’s just the nature of the thing. When I tell you what this was all about, I would expect you to dismiss it out of hand. “What, that? Are you kidding?” But as I said, it happens to all of us.

It was Eve. I pitted Eve after she told the story of (quietly) mocking someone on the subway (or bus) who was wearing a pendant which was of Christ with an arrangement of jewels that struck her as funny. Eve was a much beloved MPSIMSer, and you were her friend. Your defence of her was not surprising, but you do not now recall how summarily one-sided and mean it was. My impression of how things unfolded were that you were so angry at me for being angry at her that you took it upon yourself to fan the flames against me. You dismissed my side as though it didn’t even exist. You made me persona non grata without a care in the world or even a flip of a coin. You wouldn’t even address me directly. This is the first time you and I have communicated directly about a significant thing in a long time, in fact.

Yes, I am to blame for my part in our falling out. There is no question of that. Nothing would please me more than making amends with you. If it takes an apology, I can muster a good 'un. (And no, I won’t pay you any money. :D) But short of drawing blood, I’m willing to do whatever you think is necessary to bury this hurt. We might as well make something considered good by all come out of all this.

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**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\
**Post date:** [February 25, 2007, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-liberal-im-not-pitting-you-im-just-confused/393489/270 "2007-02-25T23:23:16Z")

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[QUOTE=Quiddity Glomfuster]  
Well, no. People ask me a question or in some way expect a response here, do they not?  
[/QUOTE]

::: watches a family of yahbits hopping into the woods, their little white cottontails bouncing behind the ::: 😉

Yeah, but an item of Message Board Wisdom I’ve learned the hard way:

_Just because they expect it does not mean that you owe it to them._

===

In other matters, specifically the ability to hurt feelings through intemperate comments on a message board like the SDMB:

“It’s all fun and games until someone gets their eye poked out!” :smack:

And, no, a Christian is not _ipso facto_ possessed of a calm and serene, non-vengeful temper, though he or she is supposed to strive to develop one. It’s the effort to do so that is commanded (IMO) – not the actual accomplishment of having done so. (Though anything short of that is a fault, and one which should be repented of, with due amends offered. In view of **Jodi** ’s and **ETF** ’s comments, though, I’m not sure what amends **Lib** might offer that would satisfy their honor.

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**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\
**Post date:** [February 25, 2007, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-liberal-im-not-pitting-you-im-just-confused/393489/271 "2007-02-25T23:29:59Z")

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[QUOTE=What Exit?]  
Yeah but she got pitted only once, for you it is a fairly normal activity. 😃  
[/QUOTE]  
Well, the mods have contests for who has been pitted most. Why shouldn’t we? In all sincerity, though, these are nothing like the pittiings of old. You know very well that had I not grown at least some, I would have flamed out days ago. 😃

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**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\
**Post date:** [February 25, 2007, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-liberal-im-not-pitting-you-im-just-confused/393489/272 "2007-02-25T23:30:47Z")

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[QUOTE=Quiddity Glomfuster]  
Yeah, but I see that he’s saying she’s in the right.  
[/QUOTE]  
Long after the intended damage\* was done, in a separate thread where he’s trying to justify himself. Better than nothing, yes, but not sufficient to absolve him. He said it, he has to live with it. If I say something craptilicious, I fully expect others here to hold it against me. That’s how it is here in Doperdom, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. We’re all accountable for what we say here, people have long memories, and they don’t give bullshit a pass.

By the way, my apologies for mangling your initials as **QF** rather than **QG**. Somehow the fuster overbore the glom.

On preview: Very nicely put, **Sarahfeena** , and I’d think so even if you weren’t sticking up for me about **Lib** ’s comment. 😉

Hey, **What Exit?** – what was my Pitting? I’m sure you’re right, but I don’t recall it – and spare me the early-onset Alzheimer jokes, you whippersnapper. Wanna email me with a link? I figure there’s enough rotting corpses being exhumed around here as it is without adding that to the pile. 😃

**Lib** , we’ve done the falling-out-and-making-up dance before, you’ve done itwith other people, and I just can’t be bothered to try again. I consider it as useful as a troop surge into a civil war. If you want to take that as all my fault and letting you off the hook, knock yourself out.  
\*A swing and a miss – it was so far beyond the pale I just figured he was off his meds again. And yes, that was a snarky comment, you don’t need to point it out.

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**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\
**Post date:** [February 25, 2007, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-liberal-im-not-pitting-you-im-just-confused/393489/273 "2007-02-25T23:39:08Z")

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[QUOTE=EddyTeddyFreddy]  
If you want to take that as all my fault and letting you off the hook, knock yourself out.  
[/QUOTE]  
I’ll take the silver lining — you addressed me directly.

(Lib signing off for Oscar mania.)

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**Author:** ![Quiddity\_Glomfuster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/c4cdca/32.png) [@Quiddity\_Glomfuster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quiddity_Glomfuster)\
**Post date:** [February 25, 2007, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-liberal-im-not-pitting-you-im-just-confused/393489/274 "2007-02-25T23:39:19Z")

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[QUOTE=Sarahfeena]

> [@](#):
>
> it seems a little crazy for someone like myself to jump in and start taking sides when I wasn’t around for all this history.

The side I am taking is the side of ‘no matter how much you dislike someone, it’s not ok to attack him personally’.

> [@](#):
>
> I mean, think about it…wouldn’t it seem a little foolish, as someone who doesn’t know what has gone down over the years, for me to jump in and start pointing fingers at who is being fair and who isn’t?

Did I point a finger?

> [@](#):
>
> Probably the meanest post I have read here in the past week was the one **Liberal** directed at **EddyTeddyFreddy** , and you seem to want to give him a pass on that.

I’m not giving him a pass. I said it was nasty. What would you like? Me to attack him personally? He acknowledges it wasn’t nice and that he was wrong to be so vicious. Shall I get a stick and beat him?

> [@](#):
>
> But it seems to me that if someone has come to dislike him, and came upon that dislike honestly over 5 years of conversations on this board, it’s a tad presumptuous for you to come in and say that they shouldn’t feel it.

I’m saying they should let it go for the sake of their own health.

> [@](#):
>
> I also think it’s kind of weird that you would come into the Pit…a forum that seems to be specifically designed for people to get things off their chests with other posters, so that the other forums remain relatively civil…and tell people that it’s inappropriate to get those things off their chests. If you don’t like the way things work in the Pit, seriously, just stay out of it…it’s not worth your own aggravation.

Isn’t it possible to get something off one’s chest without attacking a person? And I’m not aggravated.

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**Author:** ![Quiddity\_Glomfuster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/c4cdca/32.png) [@Quiddity\_Glomfuster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quiddity_Glomfuster)\
**Post date:** [February 25, 2007, 11:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-liberal-im-not-pitting-you-im-just-confused/393489/275 "2007-02-25T23:41:15Z")

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[QUOTE=Contrapuntal]  
In another thread I repeatedly asked you a question that you refused to answer.  
[/quote]

I answered it many times. You appeared to be unable to comprehend the answer. I gave up. I admit it. I quit trying to make myself understood because it appeared futile.

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**Author:** ![Quiddity\_Glomfuster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/c4cdca/32.png) [@Quiddity\_Glomfuster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quiddity_Glomfuster)\
**Post date:** [February 25, 2007, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-liberal-im-not-pitting-you-im-just-confused/393489/276 "2007-02-25T23:46:10Z")

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[QUOTE=Polycarp]  
::: watches a family of yahbits hopping into the woods, their little white cottontails bouncing behind the ::: 😉  
[/quote]

😛 Quit watching my tail. It’s a great one, but still…

> [@](#):
>
> Yeah, but an item of Message Board Wisdom I’ve learned the hard way:
> 
> _Just because they expect it does not mean that you owe it to them._

Oh you, you, sense-maker, you 😛 Point taken but really, I’m thinking that some of these exchanges are ending up positively, don’t you? And I’m enjoying that.

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**Author:** ![Contrapuntal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e274bd/32.png) [@Contrapuntal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Contrapuntal)\
**Post date:** [February 25, 2007, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-liberal-im-not-pitting-you-im-just-confused/393489/277 "2007-02-25T23:48:09Z")

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[QUOTE=Quiddity Glomfuster]  
I answered it many times.  
[/QUOTE]  
No, you didn’t. This is your M.O. You try to whittle things down down to the finest point possible, and when you get nailed on it, protest that you have already answered the question. It was not only I who pressed you on the point. You had many interlocutors. Could it be that every one of us missed this fabled response of yours when our we ever so keenly sought it?

Doubtful. It is much more likely that you intensely dislike being proven wrong, and will go so far as to lie to wriggle out of it. In fact, I called you a liar in that same GD thread, and you could not gather the gumption to respond. This was separate from the answer you gave that only you could see, by the way.

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**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\
**Post date:** [February 25, 2007, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-liberal-im-not-pitting-you-im-just-confused/393489/278 "2007-02-25T23:48:55Z")

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[QUOTE=EddyTeddyFreddy]  
Hey, **What Exit?** – what was my Pitting? I’m sure you’re right, but I don’t recall it – and spare me the early-onset Alzheimer jokes, you whippersnapper. Wanna email me with a link? I figure there’s enough rotting corpses being exhumed around here as it is without adding that to the pile. 😃 .  
[/QUOTE]

I thought \*\*Liberal \*\* was talking about **twickster**. I may have been wrong, that happens often enough.

Jim

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**Author:** ![Quiddity\_Glomfuster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/c4cdca/32.png) [@Quiddity\_Glomfuster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quiddity_Glomfuster)\
**Post date:** [February 25, 2007, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-liberal-im-not-pitting-you-im-just-confused/393489/279 "2007-02-25T23:49:40Z")

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[QUOTE=EddyTeddyFreddy]

By the way, my apologies for mangling your initials as **QF** rather than **QG**. Somehow the fuster overbore the glom.  
[/quote]

I was actually doublechecking myself - ‘Quiddity what?’ LOL.

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**Author:** ![Sarahfeena](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sarahfeena/32/519_2.png) [@Sarahfeena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sarahfeena)\
**Post date:** [February 25, 2007, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-liberal-im-not-pitting-you-im-just-confused/393489/280 "2007-02-25T23:51:50Z")

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[QUOTE=Quiddity Glomfuster]

The side I am taking is the side of ‘no matter how much you dislike someone, it’s not ok to attack him personally’.  
[/QUOTE]  
OK, but **Liberal** dishes that out with the best of them, from what I’ve see of his treatment of **ETF**.

> [@](#):
>
> Did I point a finger?

Yes:

[QUOTE=Your first post in this thread]  
You know what? This is getting disgusting. Every time Liberal posts something, a bunch of vultures follow on and attack. I have read quite a few of his posts and nothing seems out of the order here. Whatever his ‘sins’ may have been in past, I think it’s beyond juvenile to follow someone around and pile on him for every word he types.

For a board that is populated with people who seem to consider themselves superior, I’m not seeing superior behaviour on the part of a lot of you.

The excessively arrogant and rude behaviour of the militant atheists here is obnoxious and annoying. Would you grow the fuck up? Nothing Liberal said in this thread was worthy of all this bile and vituperation. How do people get so obscenely nasty? Are you all so out of control that you can’t just let someone you dislike (for whatever reason) be and post without feeling you have to bash him incessantly?

Cripes.

Is this a good board or is it yet another version of high school?  
[/QUOTE]

> [@](#):
>
> I’m not giving him a pass. I said it was nasty. What would you like? Me to attack him personally? He acknowledges it wasn’t nice and that he was wrong to be so vicious. Shall I get a stick and beat him?

No, I don’t think you should attack him personally. The point of my post was that maybe you should stay out of it altogether if you don’t know the backstory. Otherwise, you are basically just doing what you are telling everyone else they shouldn’t do, even though they are more entitled to because they already have a relationship with **Liberal** , which you don’t.

> [@](#):
>
> I’m saying they should let it go for the sake of their own health.

It’s nice of you to be concerned, but I think most of the folks on this board can handle it.

> [@](#):
>
> Isn’t it possible to get something off one’s chest without attacking a person? And I’m not aggravated.

Yes, it’s possible, but if a bunch of people want to react to each other that way, and they are all giving it back and forth, what difference does it make to you? Frankly, it seems to aggravate you. Otherwise, why would you come in here and tell people to stop? Just back away from the Pit! Usually, people are quite pleasant to each other in MPSIMS and IMHO…if you like that kind of board interaction, knock yourself out over there.

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