# To Mods: Guidelines for having a thread closed if you are the OP **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 28, 2003, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-mods-guidelines-for-having-a-thread-closed-if-you-are-the-op/151471 "2003-01-28T14:16:24Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![Mtgman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b5a626/32.png) [@Mtgman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mtgman)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2003, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-mods-guidelines-for-having-a-thread-closed-if-you-are-the-op/151471/141 "2003-01-31T18:37:15Z")
Didn’t you hear? The bourgeois have already won. Every time someone applauds a person who works two jobs to support an ailing loved one the priveledged elite who sneer at such pathetic drudgery lose another member. Clap hard **Suspenderzzz** , you’re tinkerbell’s only hope! Enjoy, Steven ---
**Author:** ![andros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e480ec/32.png) [@andros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andros)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2003, 6:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-mods-guidelines-for-having-a-thread-closed-if-you-are-the-op/151471/142 "2003-01-31T18:39:02Z")
I **do** believe in Bohemians! I **do** , I **do**! ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2003, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-mods-guidelines-for-having-a-thread-closed-if-you-are-the-op/151471/143 "2003-01-31T18:47:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Suspenderzzz \* > \*\*You might have something there. Fresh, clever, and totally unpredictable. > > \ \*\* Way back at the top of the page, I was going to post a warning not to feed the troll. Reading down further, I didn’t post for three reasons. 1. Others had already posted that warning. 2. It probably wouldn’t have done any good. 3. We’re no longer feeding the troll. She’s feeding us. #3 is my big revelation of the day. It’s why this thread is continuing as long as it has. **Suspenderzzz** just can’t stop responding. She can’t stop checking this thread. She can’t stop reacting to what we’re saying, even if that reaction is to claim that she really has no reaction. We’ve hooked her. I actually feel a sense of communal empowerment right now because we’ve managed to turn the tables on a troll. She thinks we’re stuck on her every word but, right now, it’s clearly the opposite. It sucks letting others have that much control over your life, doesn’t it? ---
**Author:** ![lno](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a8b319/32.png) [@lno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lno)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2003, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-mods-guidelines-for-having-a-thread-closed-if-you-are-the-op/151471/144 "2003-01-31T18:50:30Z")
My happy thought is the machinery of capitalism being oiled by the blood of the workers. ---
**Author:** ![Hamadryad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/6de8d8/32.png) [@Hamadryad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hamadryad)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2003, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-mods-guidelines-for-having-a-thread-closed-if-you-are-the-op/151471/145 "2003-01-31T19:12:53Z")
Dear **Miller** and **Fenris** : I thought the \ tag was unnecessary. I see that I was wrong. Jesus, **Fenris** , have you been _waiting_ for a chance to jump in my shit? Re: Susp’zzz…How droll. Move along. ---
**Author:** ![Maeglin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8baadc/32.png) [@Maeglin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maeglin)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2003, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-mods-guidelines-for-having-a-thread-closed-if-you-are-the-op/151471/146 "2003-01-31T19:13:04Z")
So that’s why you give blood every month, **lno**. ---
**Author:** ![Exgineer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a88e4f/32.png) [@Exgineer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Exgineer)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2003, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-mods-guidelines-for-having-a-thread-closed-if-you-are-the-op/151471/147 "2003-01-31T19:37:51Z")
At this point I think our time would be better spent discussing monkeys. Monkeys are interesting. For instance, the major division is between Old World and New World monkeys. Evidently, one group has prehensile tails and the other doesn’t, but I can’t remember which was which. Can I get a little help? ---
**Author:** ![Bad\_News\_Baboon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5fc32e/32.png) [@Bad\_News\_Baboon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bad_News_Baboon)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2003, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-mods-guidelines-for-having-a-thread-closed-if-you-are-the-op/151471/148 "2003-01-31T19:42:39Z")
New World Monkeys are all thoroughly arboreal and most have long, prehensile tails with which they can manipulate objects and hang from branches. In most the thumb is lacking. When you think of a ‘monkey’ chances are it’s a new world one. The spider monkey is in this group. Old world Monkeys include Baboons, Gibbons and Macaques. Most people think of a Gibbon when they picture baboons. The Gibbons are the ones with the red nose and the blue checks. Also, the blue the cheeks the more irrate they are. ---
**Author:** ![Bren\_Cameron\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@Bren\_Cameron\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bren_Cameron_1)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2003, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-mods-guidelines-for-having-a-thread-closed-if-you-are-the-op/151471/149 "2003-01-31T19:43:05Z")
According to this site: [http://www.brevardzoo.org/animal\_html/latin\_america/details.cfm?ID=7](http://www.brevardzoo.org/animal_html/latin_america/details.cfm?ID=7) Spider monkeys are from Latin America, and they have prehensile tails. ---
**Author:** ![Hamlet](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hamlet/32/2818_2.png) [@Hamlet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hamlet)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2003, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-mods-guidelines-for-having-a-thread-closed-if-you-are-the-op/151471/150 "2003-01-31T19:49:50Z")
[But what about monkeys who eat cheese and surrender?](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=159255) I’ve noticed there has been WAY too many disparaging remarks about monkeys on these boards. -Hamlet, President MADL (Monkey Anti-Definition League) ---
**Author:** ![Exgineer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a88e4f/32.png) [@Exgineer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Exgineer)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2003, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-mods-guidelines-for-having-a-thread-closed-if-you-are-the-op/151471/151 "2003-01-31T19:54:06Z")
Waitaminnit. I thought the gibbons were the fluffy white ones with the black faces, and its was the mandrills with the red noses and blue cheeks. Lemurs aren’t monkeys at all right? ---
**Author:** ![tiny\_ham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2003, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-mods-guidelines-for-having-a-thread-closed-if-you-are-the-op/151471/152 "2003-01-31T19:55:15Z")
My favorite monkeys are titi monkeys. Mating couples sleep together on the same branch with their tails entertwined. Very bourgeois, very romantic. ---
**Author:** ![Bren\_Cameron\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@Bren\_Cameron\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bren_Cameron_1)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2003, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-mods-guidelines-for-having-a-thread-closed-if-you-are-the-op/151471/153 "2003-01-31T19:56:09Z")
Lemurs aren’t monkeys, but they are primates. The Monkees weren’t monkeys, either. But they were primates, too. ---
**Author:** ![tiny\_ham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2003, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-mods-guidelines-for-having-a-thread-closed-if-you-are-the-op/151471/154 "2003-01-31T19:57:20Z")
AND bandmates. Mickey was my favorite Monkee. ---
**Author:** ![papergirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/aca169/32.png) [@papergirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/papergirl)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2003, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-mods-guidelines-for-having-a-thread-closed-if-you-are-the-op/151471/155 "2003-01-31T19:57:26Z")
Y’all remember that little girl in elementary or middle school? The one who realized early on that no one liked her, and rather than figuring out that they didn’t like her because she was rude or didn’t know how to get along with other people, she convinced herself that the reason for her unpopularity was because everyone else was jealous of her brilliance? So she spent years grooming her ego, going deeper and deeper into denial, until finally, ta dah! some thirty years later, she is realio trulio in the depths of some bizarre paranoid delusional fantasy world. That’s our girl. It makes me kind of sad. Suspenderzzz, I truly am sorry that…whatever happened to you, happened to you. But you’re a grown woman now, and adults, at some point, begin to realize that the world does not, in fact, revolve around them no matter how incredibly amazingly brilliant and unique and whatever they are. This message board doesn’t revolve around you either, and it’s truly sad to see that you think it does. **Enderw24** is exactly right…_you_ are the one who is hooked here. If you really felt as supremely confident as you would like us to think, you’d shrug your shoulders, write us off, and go do your thing instead of continually sticking out your tongue and shouting, “Lookitme! Lookitme!” And I hate to tell you this, but let’s see…Kid. Job. Bills to pay. SO (at least until recently). Presence on a message board…Honey, you can’t GET much more conformist than that, no matter how you slice it. Sorry, but there it is. I can’t believe that you’d be considered nonconformist ANYwhere, much less in a big city. Hell, I’m from a little town in Indiana, and even here you’d be run of the mill. And that’s **okay.** Why aren’t you okay with being a regular old person? Why the constant demand for attention and adulation for how unique you are? Just food for thought, as you don’t appear to be doing any real _thinking_ in any of your posts so far. Best, karol ---
**Author:** ![Bad\_News\_Baboon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5fc32e/32.png) [@Bad\_News\_Baboon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bad_News_Baboon)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2003, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-mods-guidelines-for-having-a-thread-closed-if-you-are-the-op/151471/156 "2003-01-31T19:57:31Z")
I resent that you only care for monkeys. May I suggest a more encompassing PADL (say “Paddle”) Primate Anti-defimation League. or the Texas branch: Simian Anti-defimation League. ---
**Author:** ![Bad\_News\_Baboon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5fc32e/32.png) [@Bad\_News\_Baboon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bad_News_Baboon)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2003, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-mods-guidelines-for-having-a-thread-closed-if-you-are-the-op/151471/157 "2003-01-31T19:58:55Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Exgineer \* > \*\*Waitaminnit. > > I thought the gibbons were the fluffy white ones with the black faces, and its was the mandrills with the red noses and blue cheeks. > > Lemurs aren’t monkeys at all right? \*\* I was so thrilled I could answer something… and I boffed it up. you are correct sir: A madrill has the blue checks. ---
**Author:** ![carrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9de0a6/32.png) [@carrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carrot)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2003, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-mods-guidelines-for-having-a-thread-closed-if-you-are-the-op/151471/158 "2003-01-31T20:01:13Z")
**bodypoet** , stop trying to hijack a very informative monkey thread. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Mars\_Horizon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mars_horizon/32/2804_2.png) [@Mars\_Horizon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mars_Horizon)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2003, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-mods-guidelines-for-having-a-thread-closed-if-you-are-the-op/151471/159 "2003-01-31T20:02:02Z")
A moose once bit my sister ---
**Author:** ![tiny\_ham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2003, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-mods-guidelines-for-having-a-thread-closed-if-you-are-the-op/151471/160 "2003-01-31T20:03:50Z")
I collect moose figurines and such. In fact I even have a pair of dice with moose on them! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-mods-guidelines-for-having-a-thread-closed-if-you-are-the-op/151471.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-mods-guidelines-for-having-a-thread-closed-if-you-are-the-op/151471.md?page=9)