# To My Hypocritical Finnish Friend **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [October 30, 2015, 12:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-my-hypocritical-finnish-friend/736167 "2015-10-30T12:39:45Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![tnetennba](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7993a0/32.png) [@tnetennba](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tnetennba)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2015, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-my-hypocritical-finnish-friend/736167/41 "2015-11-01T17:35:31Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > Personally, I think it’s passive aggressive, but a lot of Miss Manners stuff is. For crying out loud “passive aggressive” isn’t meant to be anything that ever makes somebody feel bad. It is actual sabotaging somebody’s life in some way without taking responsibility. I’m used to people using that term willy nilly but this is the most ridiculous example of its misuse because you’re talking about something that is the exact opposite of, and solution to, passive aggressive behavior. Say I have a problem with somebody’s comments. Passive aggressive behavior would be never mentioning but finding little ways to make them pay for it – throwing their things away “on accident”, talking about them behind their back, whatever. The actual healthy, constructive, non-example of passive aggressive behavior is telling them exactly why I have a problem with it. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2015, 7:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-my-hypocritical-finnish-friend/736167/42 "2015-11-01T19:08:53Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > You do not get to make fun of someone’s mental illness, you fucking sack of filth. You do not get to take the absolute worst thing that ever happened to someone and use that to score points against them. And yet you did just [that](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=18540205&postcount=60) a few months ago. Mental illness isn’t an excuse for being a jackass, however much you may wish it were so. ---
**Author:** ![Penfeather](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/penfeather/32/384_2.png) [@Penfeather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Penfeather)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2015, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-my-hypocritical-finnish-friend/736167/43 "2015-11-01T19:56:21Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > Don’t comment on human relationships when you think that’s remotely something you can say to other people. > > You do not get to make fun of someone’s mental illness, you fucking sack of filth. You do not get to take the absolute worst thing that ever happened to someone and use that to score points against them. > > How would you like it if you had been raped, and I said you didn’t have the right to talk in relationship threads because of it? Or if you had a child die in your arms and people said you couldn’t comment in child rearing threads? > > Mental illness is not some allowable thing to discriminate against someone for. For the same reason I do not get to tell Czarcasm that he deserved to be raped, you do not have the right to make fun of me for my agoraphobia. > > \*\*I said only what the fucking experts also say. Notice you have no counterargument? \*\* That’s because I had a life before agoraphobia. Because I am intelligent, I analyzed how social interactions worked. I talked it over with experts, and got a clear idea of how the world works. > > Sure, some other Dopers have done the same thing (in fact, most of them have, since this is an intellectual messageboard), and then can go toe to toe with me. But you bloody vaginas clearly can’t. > > **I do not lack experience.** Any claim that I do is based on you being too stupid to understand. I get out. I interact with people. I have 23 years of doign so before agoraphobia was ever a thing. You make fun of me because you are stupid and that’s the only thing you have to use. > > The only reason I let this shit go is that I feel sorry for you sad sacks of shit that get your self-worth by attacking someone because he dared admit his mental illness. If you disagree with me, you can argue with me. You can nicely bring up some lack of experience. But you DO NOT GET TO USE MY MENTAL ILLNESS to score points. > > Plus doing this shit is just another reason for me to continue doing whatever it is that bothers you. Because you are a horrible human being, and I will not give you what you want. Have you been at the caesin again, little feller? You know Mum keeps it locked up for a reason. ---
**Author:** ![Svejk\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ea666f/32.png) [@Svejk\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Svejk_1)\ **Post date:** [November 1, 2015, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-my-hypocritical-finnish-friend/736167/44 "2015-11-01T20:01:00Z")
**BigT** , I had no idea about your mental illness and I did not mean to reference any sort of diagnosis on your part. That would have been awful. I just think that your behavior on this board demonstrates that you should not be pontificating about how to interact in friendships or human relations generally. I think your insane diatribe amply proves my point. ---
**Author:** ![Longshanks](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Longshanks](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Longshanks)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2015, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-my-hypocritical-finnish-friend/736167/45 "2015-11-02T01:09:25Z")
Why is the Bigtard allowed to play on the computer after his bedtime? ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2015, 2:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-my-hypocritical-finnish-friend/736167/46 "2015-11-02T02:24:34Z")
Remember when this thread was fun? We were making fun of the Finns? That is always fun. And how anybody could get nostalgic about Finnish food is beyond me. I know Finns. Cooks they are not. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2015, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-my-hypocritical-finnish-friend/736167/47 "2015-11-02T02:41:07Z")
Great hockey players though. ---
**Author:** ![D\_Anconia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/67e7ee/32.png) [@D\_Anconia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/D_Anconia)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2015, 5:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-my-hypocritical-finnish-friend/736167/48 "2015-11-02T05:47:04Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > Plus doing this shit is just another reason for me to continue doing whatever it is that bothers you. Isn’t that an open admission of trolling? ---
**Author:** ![Steken](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e274bd/32.png) [@Steken](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steken)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2015, 8:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-my-hypocritical-finnish-friend/736167/49 "2015-11-02T08:15:06Z")
Haven’t read the whole thread, but have you considered just calmly telling her, the next time she complains over the Syrian immigrants flooding Finland, that “but, hey, to be fair though - isn’t that sort of how you yourself came to the U.S.?” In a friendly, disarming, “OK lemme play Devil’s Advocate for a minute here” sort of way. BTW Finnish food does indeed suck, but it’s got a lot of other nice things going for it. The place has the sauna thing down pat, an absolute treasure trove of legendary black and death metal, a fascinating language, great design, the Moomins, Kaurismäki, etc., etc. ---
**Author:** ![Gary\_Kumquat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4491bb/32.png) [@Gary\_Kumquat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gary_Kumquat)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2015, 8:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-my-hypocritical-finnish-friend/736167/50 "2015-11-02T08:20:17Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > It’s part of a common world wide attitude towards America. Everyone wants to be here, everyone wants what we have, but they have to say they hate us to get cred with their peers. It’s not like Americans don’t do the same thing in other countries, except that everything actually is better here. You don’t get out much, do you? ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2015, 10:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-my-hypocritical-finnish-friend/736167/51 "2015-11-02T10:04:55Z")
> [@Kimballkid](#): > > The birch trees are getting bored now? I thought it was just the ash trees. > > How do you entertain a tree anyway? With a party: Benny Birch’s Birthday Party in Thunder Bay, Ontario, where over 13% of the humans are of Finnish descent. Alas, Benny didn’t celebrate his birthday this year, for the first time in several decades. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2015, 12:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-my-hypocritical-finnish-friend/736167/52 "2015-11-02T12:22:45Z")
> [@D\_Anconia](#): > > Isn’t that an open admission of trolling? Heh ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2015, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-my-hypocritical-finnish-friend/736167/53 "2015-11-02T13:34:02Z")
> [@JRDelirious](#): > > Don’t get us started on the maples/oaks class conflict… when oak trees ask permission of the birch to make an acorn–valleys accuse their mountains of having altitude–and march declares april to be a saboteur then i’ll believe in that incredible unanimal mankind and not until –e.e. cummings ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2015, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-my-hypocritical-finnish-friend/736167/54 "2015-11-02T21:18:29Z")
> [@Sattua](#): > > Did you just use a female body part as a slur? > > Edit: stupid rhetorical question. You clearly did. Wow, **BigT** , your posts had led me to believe otherwise of you but that is a pretty racist thing to say. ---
**Author:** ![Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a587f6/32.png) [@Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freddy_the_Pig)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2015, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-my-hypocritical-finnish-friend/736167/55 "2015-11-02T22:05:30Z")
> [@nicky](#): > > The correct way to deal with scandinavians\* is to forget their country exists and randomly assign them one of the other three nationalities\*. And then fail to grasp what particular combination of reindeer bothering, binge drinking and pious hypocrisy their miserable little region is supposedly renowned. Also, tell them how much you like ABBA. Regardless of whether your interlocutor is Swedish. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2015, 10:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-my-hypocritical-finnish-friend/736167/56 "2015-11-02T22:11:01Z")
> [@Punoqllads](#): > > That’s a pretty big loaf if you can fit an elk in it. They come in bite-sized nuggets now, marketed as “Møøse Bites”. Mind you, Møøse Bites kan be pretti nasti… ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2015, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-my-hypocritical-finnish-friend/736167/57 "2015-11-02T23:29:31Z")
I agree that Finland have better K-12 schools and a superior social safety net. But _food_? At least Denmark has cookies and Sweden has carrot cake. What the hell has Finland contributed to the global cuisine? [What the hell kinda food is this!?](http://hirose.sendai-nct.ac.jp/00submenu/05zaiko/WWW-page/Finnishfood.html) [sub]OK, [this looks kinda good.](https://elitefood.files.wordpress.com/2012/05/vaniljapullat.jpg)[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Fenris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fenris/32/498_2.png) [@Fenris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fenris)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2015, 5:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-my-hypocritical-finnish-friend/736167/58 "2015-11-03T05:05:26Z")
[Quote=D’Anconia] Isn’t that an open admission of trolling? [/quote] He’s made the same admission of trolling a number of times before. I think the mods let him stay, despite that, out of a combination of pity and the entertainment value the little troll has. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2015, 11:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-my-hypocritical-finnish-friend/736167/59 "2015-12-29T23:27:06Z")
> [@Fenris](#): > > He’s made the same admission of trolling a number of times before. I think the mods let him stay, despite that, out of a combination of pity and the entertainment value the little troll has. You have admitted being a liar and a internet bully, and they let _you_ stay. ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [December 29, 2015, 11:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-my-hypocritical-finnish-friend/736167/60 "2015-12-29T23:42:57Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > I’ve never personally experienced it, and appearance doesn’t always correlate with flavor, but the search “Finnish food looks like shit” brings up some very unappetizing photos on Google Images. Finnish pancakes are excellent. Pretty much all other Finnish food not only looks like shit, but also tastes like shit. I say this as someone who lives in the city with the largest Finnish population outside of Finland and neighbouring Scandinavia. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-my-hypocritical-finnish-friend/736167.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-my-hypocritical-finnish-friend/736167.md?page=4)