# To some of the assholes at the local dog park **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 19, 2011, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-some-of-the-assholes-at-the-local-dog-park/582499 "2011-05-19T20:40:43Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![flatlined](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/eb9ed0/32.png) [@flatlined](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flatlined)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2015, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-some-of-the-assholes-at-the-local-dog-park/582499/61 "2015-01-28T19:22:44Z")
Can a mod let me go back and edit my fucking post? Obviously, I didn’t swear enough. If enough of us do it, we might be able to make her head asplode. ---
**Author:** ![curlcoat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ea5d25/32.png) [@curlcoat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/curlcoat)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2015, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-some-of-the-assholes-at-the-local-dog-park/582499/62 "2015-01-28T19:56:19Z")
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! BTW, anyone who calls themselves a “dog mom” is no grownup. ---
**Author:** ![Strainger](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/strainger/32/244_2.png) [@Strainger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Strainger)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2015, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-some-of-the-assholes-at-the-local-dog-park/582499/63 "2015-01-28T19:59:20Z")
I hope you’ll all pardon my fucking hijack, but I’d like to tell you all about my fucking rescue dogs. I fucking love those fuckers. I fucking got Frankie, a fucking 8 year-old corgi-dachshund mix, from a fucking rescue shelter near my fucking house at the time. The fuckers who had him before got their fucking house foreclosed on and fucking returned him. Before that, he’d been a fucking stray. I don’t know if some cocksucker had abandoned him or if he’d just been fucking born to some other fucking stray dog. Either way, he’s 13 now and will live out the rest of his fucking days being fucking loved and fucking well cared for. A couple of fucking months later, I decided I had enough room for another fucking dog. That’s when I fucking adopted Sammy from another fucking rescue shelter nearby. He was a fucking two year old chihuahua min-pin mix. The cocksuckers who’d had him before turned him in to the fucking kill shelter, most likely after fucking abusing him all his fucking life, where he’d been put on the fucking kill list for being fucking “timid,” which was fucking bullshit considering that it’s not exactly a fucking unusual reaction to being taken out of your fucking home and put into a fucking concrete cage. Anyway, the fucking rescue shelter got him out and I’ve fucking loved having him and Frankie as fucking members of my fucking family. Lately I’ve been fostering some fucking dogs too. The first little fucker, Goliath, was a fucking chiweenie that had been fucking rescued from a fucking high kill shelter with another fucking 129 dogs ahead of a huge fucking adoption event. He was somewhat fucking timid; I think the cocksuckers who owned him before had fucking abused him. He just fucking stayed over night and was fucking adopted out pretty fucking quickly at the fucking event. I got to see a fucking picture of him with his new fucking human brother having fun in the fucking hot springs nearby, which made me really fucking happy. I fostered a fucking bitch puppy, Ella, a few fucking weeks ago until she could be fucking spayed and put up for fucking adoption. Again, she was adopted pretty fucking quickly at the fucking adoption event a couple of fucking days later and I got to see the happy fucking picture of her with her new for-fucking-ever family. It’s been very fucking rewarding and I can’t wait to fucking foster even more poor little fuckers. Does anyone else have any fucking rescue stories? I’d love to fucking hear them! ---
**Author:** ![GargoyleWB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gargoylewb/32/199_2.png) [@GargoyleWB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GargoyleWB)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2015, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-some-of-the-assholes-at-the-local-dog-park/582499/64 "2015-01-28T20:02:57Z")
The latest parkwads… The setup: New parents walk into the dog park with two frolicsome puppies on leashes and pushing a baby stroller with their baby (don’t know if it was neutered) inside. The suspense: They are charged by about 8 dogs coming to greet them, bounding in and out and around, while the parents flail in panic The aftermath: 8 dogs run away tails wagging, greeting accomplished. Mom ineffectually bats at the mud globs covering the recovered diaper bag. Dad is at work detangling the leashes from the stroller’s structure while one puppy jumps in and out of the stroller muddying up the baby while the other puppy tries to cinch up the leash knot tangles. ---
**Author:** ![BubbaDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bubbadog/32/333_2.png) [@BubbaDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BubbaDog)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2015, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-some-of-the-assholes-at-the-local-dog-park/582499/65 "2015-01-28T20:18:15Z")
> [@Ike\_Witt](#): > > And I thought the vapours had been eradicated. Nope. After their bass player went into rehab they picked up a session player. I think he’s still with them. ---
**Author:** ![Zorkmid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e68b1a/32.png) [@Zorkmid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zorkmid)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2015, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-some-of-the-assholes-at-the-local-dog-park/582499/66 "2015-01-28T20:23:17Z")
> [@Strainger](#): > > **bitch** > Does anyone else have any fucking rescue stories? I’d love to fucking hear them! Do you fucking kiss your fucking dog with that fucking mouth??? :eek:😛 And I do have a fucking heartwarming fucking rescue fucking story. A few fucking years ago one of my coworkers fucking found a picture of an American fucking bulldog online whose fucking previous “owners” kept him locked in a fucking garage all day and only fucking gave him fucking food and fucking water once every few fucking days with nothing fucking soft to lay on. Poor fucker had both ears infected, a fucking fuckload of eye problems from fucking gas/paint/chemical fumes, and fucking skin rashes from the chemicals and laying on bare fucking concrete all day ☹ So she and her son fucking drove 6 fucking hours to pick up the poor fucker from the rescue agency, and they nursed him back to fucking health. Now he’s a happy, healthy, friendly fucker, except he still has fucking bald spots on his belly and legs. He also fucking weighs 110 fucking lbs and is totally bossed around by her fucking cat, which weighs about 6. He’s a big fucking patsy 😃 ---
**Author:** ![FuriousGeorge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ecae2f/32.png) [@FuriousGeorge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FuriousGeorge)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2015, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-some-of-the-assholes-at-the-local-dog-park/582499/67 "2015-01-28T20:25:43Z")
> [@Grown\_Up\_Dog\_Mom](#): > > Wow…I was researching dog parks on Google for my dog & your post came up in the search results. When I saw all of the profanity in just the first line, I HAD to read it. Even though your post was a few years old, I had to reply, so I registered for a Straight Dope account, just to respond to YOU. > First of all, I cannot believe the amount of profane language I your post…some of your filthy words would make truck drivers, sailors and rap musicians blush. ( NO offense to truck drivers, sailors, & rap musicians intended) Was all the swearing really necessary? Did it make you feel more like a man (or woman)?? It sure did not make you sound that way. You came off sounding like an immature CHILD trying to get a reaction from an adult. Perhaps you had a negative experience at a dog park. Maybe your dgo was attacked by an aggressive , unneutered male dog. As a dog lover myself, if that were the case, I completely understand pour frustration. If my precious dog were attacked by a bully, I’d be upset to. What I would NOT do, however is make myself look like a complete imbecile by posting a foul-mouthed, nonsensical rant that offends 99.9% of the people who read it. > Secondly, I cannot believe that the people who administrate [StraightDope.Com](http://StraightDope.Com) would allow such juvenile filth to be posted on their site. Does this site NOT have an editor, administrator or chat moderator who’s responsibility it is to protect their reasonable readers from toxic, idiotic posters like you? Having said that, I intend to cancel my account immediately after I post this reply, as I want NOTHING to do with a site that alliws people like you to post absolute garbage. > In your post, you represented yourself as a dog owner. I can only hope that in addition to being a foul-mouthed idiot, you are also a bald faced liar. Jerks like you should NOT be allowed to own a cock roach, much less a dog. If you do òwn a dog, I can only imagine how aggressive & poorly behaved it is because it’s a known fact that dogs, like children are > products of their environments. In fact, any dog if yours would be MUCH better off being euthanized than forced to be at your mercy. > I have said my piece. Grow up. Get a life, get an education, & most importantly…GET RID OF YOUR DOG!! Dogs, like children, are precious gifts, entrusted to our care & conservatorship by God. PEOPLE LIKE YOU DO NOT DESERVE & HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO BUSINESS OWNING OR BEING ANYWHERE NEAR A DOG!! Are you my neighbor? Do I live next door to George Romero? Do you Know DJ Qualls? So many questions… ---
**Author:** ![EmilyG](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/emilyg/32/364_2.png) [@EmilyG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EmilyG)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2015, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-some-of-the-assholes-at-the-local-dog-park/582499/68 "2015-01-28T20:32:12Z")
I’ve never owned a fucking dog in my life, but we’ve had a fair number of fucking rescue cats and I’ve fucking loved all my goddamn wonderful cats. The neighbour who lives behind us is a fucking great person because she’s adopted rescued dogs, rescued from the fuckers at fucking puppy mills. (I mean from a rescue who busted the puppy mills, not from the puppy mills directly.) ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2015, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-some-of-the-assholes-at-the-local-dog-park/582499/69 "2015-01-28T20:36:51Z")
> [@Grown\_Up\_Dog\_Mom](#): > > I intend to cancel my account immediately after I post this reply, as I want NOTHING to do with a site that alliws people like you to post absolute garbage. Trying a new tack, asshole sock? ---
**Author:** ![Deanna\_D](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e495f1/32.png) [@Deanna\_D](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Deanna_D)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2015, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-some-of-the-assholes-at-the-local-dog-park/582499/70 "2015-01-28T20:37:30Z")
Strainger! Your fucking rescue story was just abso-fucking-lutely awesome! I’ve been laid up by a nasty case of the fucking flu for four days, and reading your post made me laugh so hard, I fucking cried. Bravo!!! Oh, and by the way, my little bitch Molly is a rescued fucking stray, and she’s the best doggie ever. Even though she’s ignored my repeated requests to get off the fucking bed and go make me some damn herbal tea, and bring me some fucking TheraFlu, she’s still been great to have around while I’ve been recuperating. I think we’ll make a trip to the fucking dog park together when I fucking feel better. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Kimballkid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b5a626/32.png) [@Kimballkid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimballkid)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2015, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-some-of-the-assholes-at-the-local-dog-park/582499/71 "2015-01-28T20:41:49Z")
> [@Ethilrist](#): > > Wow, I hope she doesn’t flounce off in a huff More like a minute and a huff. > [@curlcoat](#): > > BTW, anyone who calls themselves a “dog mom” is no grownup. Maybe she birthed said dog. Didja ever think of that, huh? Will, didja? If she did, we need to get Ripley’s on that shit. ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2015, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-some-of-the-assholes-at-the-local-dog-park/582499/72 "2015-01-28T20:44:37Z")
> [@Grown\_Up\_Dog\_Mom](#): > > Wow…I was researching dog parks on Google for my dog & your post came up in the search results. That’s totally true. If you google _dog parks assholes_ this thread is the 3rd result. ---
**Author:** ![Kimballkid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b5a626/32.png) [@Kimballkid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimballkid)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2015, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-some-of-the-assholes-at-the-local-dog-park/582499/73 "2015-01-28T20:57:23Z")
> [@Zorkmid](#): > > one of my coworkers I think you missed one, shouldn’t that be your **fucking** coworkers? ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2015, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-some-of-the-assholes-at-the-local-dog-park/582499/74 "2015-01-28T21:44:00Z")
That was fun. ---
**Author:** ![Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/intergalactic_gladiator/32/112_2.png) [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intergalactic_Gladiator)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2015, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-some-of-the-assholes-at-the-local-dog-park/582499/75 "2015-01-28T21:54:06Z")
> [@bup](#): > > That’s totally true. If you google _dog parks assholes_ this thread is the 3rd result. Why the fuck isn’t it #1? Anyway, our dog Scotch had an awesome potty mouth that sounded kind of like my wife’s but higher pitched. She would say stuff like “Of course I love that fucking dog treat you dumbass, shithead, fucking idiot fuck human. Fuck. I’m going to fucking devour this shitballs thing.” I can’t really do it justice. RIP Scotchie, I miss that gal. ---
**Author:** ![Battle\_Pope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4bbf92/32.png) [@Battle\_Pope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Battle_Pope)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2015, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-some-of-the-assholes-at-the-local-dog-park/582499/76 "2015-01-28T22:43:32Z")
Well, fuck-a-duck. That’s the way to wake a zombie thread. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2015, 10:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-some-of-the-assholes-at-the-local-dog-park/582499/77 "2015-01-28T22:47:39Z")
> [@bup](#): > > asshole sock “Wow, thanks Grandma… you really shouldn’t have!” ---
**Author:** ![Canadjun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/76d3ee/32.png) [@Canadjun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Canadjun)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2015, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-some-of-the-assholes-at-the-local-dog-park/582499/78 "2015-01-28T23:13:11Z")
> [@EmilyG](#): > > I’ve never owned a fucking dog in my life, but we’ve had a fair number of fucking rescue cats Well, get them before they are spayed or neutered and you’ll have much greater success getting dogs and cats that still want to fuck. ---
**Author:** ![Honey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/honey/32/5074_2.png) [@Honey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Honey)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2015, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-some-of-the-assholes-at-the-local-dog-park/582499/79 "2015-01-29T00:02:30Z")
I fucking love this thread. ---
**Author:** ![flatlined](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/eb9ed0/32.png) [@flatlined](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flatlined)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2015, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-some-of-the-assholes-at-the-local-dog-park/582499/80 "2015-01-29T00:55:16Z")
I fucking saw this back when the fucking dinosaurs walked the fucking earth. Its the most amazing fucking pit thread I’ve ever fucking seen. [For your pleasure](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=588256&highlight=fucking+dogs+barking)🙂 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-some-of-the-assholes-at-the-local-dog-park/582499.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-some-of-the-assholes-at-the-local-dog-park/582499.md?page=5)