# To the Clowns in IT **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 10, 2014, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785 "2014-07-10T19:41:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2014, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/1 "2014-07-10T19:41:44Z")
Dear Mr IT Clown if you feel the need to remove an old laptop from my office while I’m away, maybe you’d better check with someone first Dear Mr IT Clown if you do remove said laptop, please don’t throw away the bag in came in, there might be something valuable inside Dear Mr IT Clown do you know how much a software dongle costs? Hint $25,000 is the correct answer Dear Mr IT clown why did you tell everyone that our old software doesn’t run under Windows 7? Dear Mr IT Clown was it because you removed the Network Dongle from the server? Dear Mr IT Clown do you know how much that is going to cost us? Hint $25,000 is way too low Dear Mr IT Clown why did you tell everyone that Windows 7 drivers do not exist for our printer? Do you not know how to use Google? Dear Mr IT Clown how long does it take to set up an e-mail account? Hint - four months is not the correct answer. Dear Mr IT Clown have you ever heard of Customer Service? Hint - if my bosses boss (who has a very senior position in a very large multinational company) comes to ask you a question and there are four of you in the office sitting around doing Jack Shit, the correct thing to do is probably not to hold up a big red STOP sign and tell him to make an appointment. So, anyone else had a bad IT day recently? ---
**Author:** ![johnpost](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f17d59/32.png) [@johnpost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/johnpost)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2014, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/2 "2014-07-10T20:00:18Z")
what a Bozo. ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2014, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/3 "2014-07-10T20:01:12Z")
You mean Pennywise? ---
**Author:** ![zoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zoid/32/336_2.png) [@zoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zoid)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2014, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/4 "2014-07-10T20:11:41Z")
Not recently but I had an IT guy remove a machine when the lease was up without telling anyone. It just so happened that this machine was running 24 hours a day, monitoring our systems, collecting data, and reporting metrics. Did I mention that they wiped the hard drive without telling anyone as well? Luckily our software vendor kept backups of the $75K of custom tailored software we had and we backed up all the data nightly, but still, who removes and wipes a machine in the still of the night without even checking with anyone first? It was kind of fun seeing the senior leadership loose their shit when they didn’t have any reports in the morning, they just assumed the entire system went down. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2014, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/5 "2014-07-10T20:31:42Z")
Don’t bother, they’re here. ---
**Author:** ![davidm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidm/32/225_2.png) [@davidm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davidm)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2014, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/6 "2014-07-10T20:31:46Z")
At least for software issues, I do everything I can to fix it myself before calling IT because in my years of experience in different companies I’ve found that they often don’t know their ass from a registry entry and I’m more likely to fix the problem than they are. For hardware issues, I’m not really authorized to open a box so I have little choice. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2014, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/7 "2014-07-10T20:40:51Z")
Have you an admin account on your machine, David? ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2014, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/8 "2014-07-10T20:46:53Z")
> [@Thudlow\_Boink](#): > > You mean Pennywise? No. Pound the foolish. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Miskatonic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mr.miskatonic/32/310_2.png) [@Mr.Miskatonic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Miskatonic)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2014, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/9 "2014-07-10T20:49:08Z")
I keep imagining a mash up between these words and the ‘Dear Kitten’ video that was viral a couple of weeks ago. ---
**Author:** ![Death\_of\_Rats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a6a055/32.png) [@Death\_of\_Rats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Death_of_Rats)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2014, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/10 "2014-07-10T20:50:40Z")
\<\\> That’s a mighty fine set of data you have there. Shame if anything should… happen… to it… A steady supply of Mountain Dew Code Red and Fritos should keep things nice and safe. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![JackieLikesVariety](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackielikesvariety/32/296_2.png) [@JackieLikesVariety](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JackieLikesVariety)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2014, 10:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/11 "2014-07-10T22:37:45Z")
> [@](#): > > was it because you removed the Network Dongle from the server? I shouldn’t have to put up with that kind of dirty talk. :mad: ---
**Author:** ![statij](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c2a13f/32.png) [@statij](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/statij)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2014, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/12 "2014-07-10T23:01:36Z")
> [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](#): > > Dear Mr IT Clown Dear Mr End User dipshit, I have been on the other end of this for years, and while some of what you say is undoubtedly on the mark, the vast majority of clownery comes from you. Do you know how to turn on a monitor? The power switch. You may also have to plug it in, but I understand that sometimes requires an IT clown. Do you know that mice don’t work by moving them around literally physically on the screen? True story. Do you know that you don’t get a new computer every 6 months because you install so much garbage that it stopped working properly? (not my policy that allowed you to do it in the first place.) If you deleted a file 6 months ago and mentioned it to me today, it probably isn’t still available. And that’s your fault not mine. I could go on forever, and I understand that IT guys are not always of the mold you might prefer. But from my experience, the average user generally makes them look like geniuses. You think we’re here to serve your whim, and you have no idea what makes IT work. ---
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2014, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/13 "2014-07-10T23:38:31Z")
> [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](#): > > Dear Mr IT Clown > > if you feel the need to remove an old laptop from my office while I’m away, maybe you’d better check with someone first > > Dear Mr IT Clown > > if you do remove said laptop, please don’t throw away the bag in came in, there might be something valuable inside > > Dear Mr IT Clown > > do you know how much a software dongle costs? Hint $25,000 is the correct answer > > Dear Mr IT clown > > why did you tell everyone that our old software doesn’t run under Windows 7? > > Dear Mr IT Clown > > was it because you removed the Network Dongle from the server? > > Dear Mr IT Clown > > do you know how much that is going to cost us? Hint $25,000 is way too low > > Dear Mr IT Clown > > why did you tell everyone that Windows 7 drivers do not exist for our printer? Do you not know how to use Google? > > Dear Mr IT Clown > > how long does it take to set up an e-mail account? Hint - four months is not the correct answer. > > Dear Mr IT Clown > > have you ever heard of Customer Service? Hint - if my bosses boss (who has a very senior position in a very large multinational company) comes to ask you a question and there are four of you in the office sitting around doing Jack Shit, the correct thing to do is probably not to hold up a big red STOP sign and tell him to make an appointment. > So, anyone else had a bad IT day recently? I honestly thought this was going to be a rant about Stephen King’s IT and the scary clown in it. ---
**Author:** ![Lemur866](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lemur866/32/434_2.png) [@Lemur866](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lemur866)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2014, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/14 "2014-07-10T23:47:37Z")
I was going with “A Wrinkle in Time”, myself: > [@](#): > > IT was the most horrible, the most repellent thing she had ever seen, far more nauseating than anything she had ever imagined with her conscious mind, or that had ever tormented her in her most terrible nightmares. ---
**Author:** ![Doughbag](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/aeb1de/32.png) [@Doughbag](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doughbag)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2014, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/15 "2014-07-11T00:00:46Z")
> [@davidm](#): > > At least for software issues, I do everything I can to fix it myself before calling IT because in my years of experience in different companies I’ve found that they often don’t know their ass from a registry entry and I’m more likely to fix the problem than they are. For hardware issues, I’m not really authorized to open a box so I have little choice. So, you’re that dipshit, that uninstalled Word for the 4th time in a row and complains that it’s the IT’s guys fault - got ya. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2014, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/16 "2014-07-11T00:06:21Z")
> [@Doughbag](#): > > So, you’re that dipshit, that uninstalled Word for the 4th time in a row and complains that it’s the IT’s guys fault - got ya. This! :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![bobot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobot/32/21622_2.png) [@bobot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobot)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2014, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/17 "2014-07-11T00:12:05Z")
…dongle. heh-heh. ---
**Author:** ![davidm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidm/32/225_2.png) [@davidm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davidm)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2014, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/18 "2014-07-11T00:12:20Z")
> [@carnivorousplant](#): > > Have you an admin account on your machine, David? Yes. I’m a developer so they give us admin accounts. ---
**Author:** ![miss\_elizabeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/838e76/32.png) [@miss\_elizabeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/miss_elizabeth)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2014, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/19 "2014-07-11T00:14:59Z")
> [@zoid](#): > > Not recently but I had an IT guy remove a machine when the lease was up without telling anyone. > It just so happened that this machine was running 24 hours a day, monitoring our systems, collecting data, and reporting metrics. > Did I mention that they wiped the hard drive without telling anyone as well? > Luckily our software vendor kept backups of the $75K of custom tailored software we had and we backed up all the data nightly, but still, who removes and wipes a machine in the still of the night without even checking with anyone first? > It was kind of fun seeing the senior leadership loose their shit when they didn’t have any reports in the morning, they just assumed the entire system went down. If it was so important, why did you let the lease run out? (in other words, its your company, not the IT guy who comes across as a stupid asshole here) ---
**Author:** ![davidm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidm/32/225_2.png) [@davidm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davidm)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2014, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/20 "2014-07-11T00:16:32Z")
> [@Doughbag](#): > > So, you’re that dipshit, that uninstalled Word for the 4th time in a row and complains that it’s the IT’s guys fault - got ya. Nope. As I said, I fix the problems myself. I’m a developer and I’ve also been the sole IT guy in the corporate office of a nationwide corporation. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785.md?page=2)