# To the Clowns in IT **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 10, 2014, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785 "2014-07-10T19:41:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2014, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/61 "2014-07-11T19:56:33Z")
> [@BubbaDog](#): > > I can’t decide which to choose. > > Should I make a condescending remark towards users or towards IT? I’ve been on both sides of this war and pretty much everything said so far is accurate. The real problem are the IT guys who can’t distinguish between users who as where the Any key is and users who have worked on a wide variety of machines and operating systems. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2014, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/62 "2014-07-11T20:06:24Z")
> [@Voyager](#): > > The real problem are the IT guys who can’t distinguish between users who as where the Any key is and users who have worked on a wide variety of machines and operating systems. You must er on the safe side. One of the salesmen I worked would would scroll through files in the Windows directory, declare, “I don’t need that!” and delete files willy-nilly. ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Negative](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/typo_negative/32/484_2.png) [@Typo\_Negative](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Negative)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2014, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/63 "2014-07-11T20:10:02Z")
I keep getting users asking me to connect to their laptops and fix problems…when the laptop is is the laptop bag in the back seat of their car. I get one or two of these a month. Half the time, it’s the same user. ---
**Author:** ![Projammer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/projammer/32/559_2.png) [@Projammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Projammer)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2014, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/64 "2014-07-11T20:40:55Z")
> [@carnivorousplant](#): > > You must er on the safe side. One of the salesmen I worked would would scroll through files in the Windows directory, declare, “I don’t need that!” and delete files willy-nilly. Back in the days of Windows 3 I had a user that understood that the files were important and that it would be very bad if deleted. Unfortunately her OCD got the better of her so all of the DLL files got moved into a folder called DLL. SYS files into SYS folder. Then I got the call… ---
**Author:** ![enipla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/54ee81/32.png) [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2014, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/65 "2014-07-11T20:51:32Z")
> [@Projammer](#): > > Back in the days of Windows 3 I had a user that understood that the files were important and that it would be very bad if deleted. Unfortunately her OCD got the better of her so all of the DLL files got moved into a folder called DLL. SYS files into SYS folder. > > Then I got the call… My dad did that. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2014, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/66 "2014-07-11T20:58:10Z")
[What an IT clown may look like.](http://images.fullmovies.com/img/IT.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Canadjun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/76d3ee/32.png) [@Canadjun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Canadjun)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2014, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/67 "2014-07-11T21:55:46Z")
> [@Voyager](#): > > The real problem are the IT guys who can’t distinguish between users who as where the Any key is and users who have worked on a wide variety of machines and operating systems. And how do they do that, assuming a large population of users? ---
**Author:** ![Uzi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/91b2a8/32.png) [@Uzi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uzi)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2014, 3:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/68 "2014-07-13T03:36:57Z")
> [@davidm](#): > > Nope. As I said, I fix the problems myself. I’m a developer and I’ve also been the sole IT guy in the corporate office of a nationwide corporation. > [@davidm](#): > > Nope. Generally problems that IT caused by messing with developers’ computers. Developers are IT. When they don’t think of themselves as such is when that part of IT that has to support the shit developers produce are in trouble. Because when that software pukes, it isn’t developers (the ones who don’t think of themselves as IT), who get the call and look bad in front of the business. > [@Dangerosa](#): > > Stop pirating software. Read the damn EULA, it is probably not free just because you are developing with it - you still need to pay. Developer All Oracle licenses are free in the Testing environment. (at a retail prices of ~$50K that left a potential liability of $5M. Developer No one is using that Oracle license anyways. (Oracle doesn’t give a shit that the license isn’t being used and why the hell didn’t you put in a change to bring down the server if it isn’t being used!? Oh, I forgot, developers can’t be bothered figuring out the Change process, or Release proces, or basic project management (applies to the PM’s as well!)…or pretty much any other IT process). ---
**Author:** ![Uzi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/91b2a8/32.png) [@Uzi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uzi)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2014, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/69 "2014-07-13T04:17:24Z")
Forgot one. “Don’t we have an Enterprise license for this?” No, and just because we might have doesn’t mean the license is free. You gotta pay and I’m NOT sorry that you are an idiot and didn’t budget for the cost. ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2014, 5:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/70 "2014-07-13T05:24:44Z")
> [@Skywatcher](#): > > I just got a sales call from some woman with an Indian accent and the mistaken belief that I’m authorized to make IT purchases. > > Sure, my position is officially Technical Support but that’s just a euphamisim for Database Editor. You can’t be authorized to make IT purchases. I can tell because you answered the phone. ---
**Author:** ![Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/46a35a/32.png) [@Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tim_T-Bonham.net)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2014, 9:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/71 "2014-07-14T09:51:57Z")
> [@dropzone](#): > > Well they aren’t using COBOL anymore, Gramps. 😉 Shows what yu know (or don’t know, really). Every time you use a credit card, that transaction eventually goes thru a COBOL program (probably one originally written pre-Year2K). And any deposit or withdrawal from your bank account – that too is likely a transaction eventually processed by a COBOL program. Not the fancy front-end you see on the ATM screen or the credit card terminal, pr your online access to your account, but deep dpwn where the actual processing is done, it’s probably still running COBOL code. ---
**Author:** ![Death\_of\_Rats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a6a055/32.png) [@Death\_of\_Rats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Death_of_Rats)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2014, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/72 "2014-07-14T19:22:17Z")
“What were you doing right before you got this error?” “Nothing…” “…” Every IT call ever. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2014, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/73 "2014-07-14T19:49:03Z")
> [@Death\_of\_Rats](#): > > “What were you doing right before you got this error?” > “Nothing…” > “…” > > Every IT call ever. In all fairness, they probably do not remember. They are writing a letter to their Mother, not consciously using a computer. It should be like making toast, set the knob, put in the bread. One doesn’t think about what the outlet voltage is, which circuit breaker the toaster is plugged into, or how many other devices are drawing current in the house. In addition, they lie to their Physicians, employers and parents, why not us? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![LibrarySpy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f9ae1b/32.png) [@LibrarySpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LibrarySpy)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2014, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/74 "2014-07-14T20:23:45Z")
As someone who can’t get her phone to connect to the Exchange server after two IT tickets and an authorization form, I’m getting a kick out of this thread… My previous admin job was remembering all my boss’s passwords, helping her change them, and repeatedly taking her damaged phones back to IT for replacements. Good times. ---
**Author:** ![Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/intergalactic_gladiator/32/112_2.png) [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intergalactic_Gladiator)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2014, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/75 "2014-07-14T20:58:27Z")
> [@statij](#): > > Dear Mr End User dipshit, > > I have been on the other end of this for years, and while some of what you say is undoubtedly on the mark, the vast majority of clownery comes from you. > > Do you know how to turn on a monitor? The power switch. You may also have to plug it in, but I understand that sometimes requires an IT clown. > Do you know that mice don’t work by moving them around literally physically on the screen? True story. > Do you know that you don’t get a new computer every 6 months because you install so much garbage that it stopped working properly? (not my policy that allowed you to do it in the first place.) > If you deleted a file 6 months ago and mentioned it to me today, it probably isn’t still available. And that’s your fault not mine. > I could go on forever, and I understand that IT guys are not always of the mold you might prefer. But from my experience, the average user generally makes them look like geniuses. You think we’re here to serve your whim, and you have no idea what makes IT work. Heh heh, I used to have my [frustrations with the end users](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=656119), but now I are one. A lot of our IT folk are getting out of that and getting into technical presales and solution engineering. Being able to narrow my focus and having a better work/life balance was a nice incentive. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2014, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/76 "2014-07-14T21:05:19Z")
> [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](#): > > A lot of our IT folk are getting out of that and getting into technical presales Wow. Talking about turning to the Dark Side! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/intergalactic_gladiator/32/112_2.png) [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intergalactic_Gladiator)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2014, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/77 "2014-07-14T21:18:01Z")
> [@carnivorousplant](#): > > Wow. Talking about turning to the Dark Side! > > 🙂 That is what we call it. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![sleestak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/919ad9/32.png) [@sleestak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sleestak)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2014, 11:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/78 "2014-07-14T23:32:28Z")
> [@dropzone](#): > > Then why do you assholes make us change our passwords every month, with no words from the dictionary, capitalization in odd places, numbers, and non-alphanumeric characters? It’s a telemarketing company, not the fucking CIA! Stupid Ass User: What do you mean my account got compromised and I have to change my password? I like my easy password. SAU: We have to take down the F&B (food and beverage) servers for at least a day? What do you mean the people who compromised my account infected the F&B system with spyware and have been sending out our customers credit card info? SAU: Why would I have to change all my passwords? Oh, having one password for all systems is bad? Really? SAU: Why is the whole system coming down? Oh, due to the security issue I caused by not securing my password led to multiple systems being infected and you had to bring in an outside security company to certify that all our servers are clean so that the \ will let us keep our license. Really? SAU: I don’t understand why the I.T. staff is so mad. What? Really? You had to replace all the hard drives on the F&B system and pay $25,000 to a vendor to certify the rest of the systems were clean? Really? Wow. SAU: Why do I have to have a password with symbols? Its hard to remember. I just keep it written down on my desk but I still have problems with it. True story. In the end, SAU, who happened to be upper management, caused us to replace all the drives in two systems. It brought on a rather intense audit and required an outside firm to be brought in to confirm we cleaned everything up. SAU had VPN access, being in upper management. The security audit did pinpoint SAU as the root entry point of the attack. Specifically his PW which was easily guessable, his wife’s name. SAU also had it written down all over the place. I don’t know much more about the specific attack as I handled the rebuild side of the giant fucking clusterfuck. The security review pointed to lax passwords as the main cause of the issue. Of course, the only people with lax password standards were upper management. They would bitch at the owners and the owners would push for lax passwords for certain people. We pushed back but the owners overruled. This little episode cost about $75,000 and two weeks of work. Assuming that your telemarketing company has _any_ sensitive data, well, there is a reason for good security. Slee ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2014, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/79 "2014-07-15T00:08:24Z")
Actually, we have loads, like everything a consumer doesn’t want to fall into the wrong hands. Therefore we have a heavily enforced paperless office, with no pens, cellphones, internet access, or MP3 players (they are thumb drives in disguise, y’know) either. My program, though, isn’t interested in people who spend their own money, so I only have and need info I could get from Google, if I could get to Google. Which I can’t, because of the people calling consumers. OTOH, unlike places where I had access, and through me a hacker, to everything about the company and its clients and needed a more-secure password, I still have the same username/password as I described above. ---
**Author:** ![DrumBum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e79b87/32.png) [@DrumBum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrumBum)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2014, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785/80 "2014-07-15T16:42:59Z")
My experiences with IT departments in the various countries I’ve worked in have been quite good so I have but a few instances where I’ve had to step outside to vent. In one site, many of the IT techs were quite new to the department and were not always able to resolve problems in a timely manner. To address this problem the manager decided that if the issue could not be resolved in less than 30 minutes, the tech was to delete everything on the pc, reinstall the operating system, and return it to the user. The user then had to install all the programs from media and configure all the settings, a task that usually consumed most of a day. In one country, we had a pc connected to several devices that took an vendor tech from the UK a lot of time to install, configure, and get working. One day, a colleague came to my office and reported that the scanner was making grinding noises. We went to have a look and found that it was a simple single sheet HP scanner whose belt was catching, and most likely a bit of oil was needed to fix things. There had been a recent request from IT for users to make use of the new Help Desk systems so I had my colleague call the helpdesk and open a ticket. A few minutes later an IT tech appeared and we outlined the problem and then stepped out for lunch, leaving the tech to do his work. When we returned from lunch, we had a looked in the room and found that the tech had taken the pc away and left everything else. :eek: A hurried call confirmed our fears that the IT tech re-imaged the pc and pronounced the problem solved. Fortunately for us, the software vendor was in country for another client and came over to fix things. I put a few drops of oil on the scanner belt and it worked fine. I can also echo other comments about software dongles and moving ones e-mail account to another country. These days all of the technical work is done on Linux workstations so calls to the helpdesk are a thing of the past. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-clowns-in-it/692785.md?page=5)