# To the spermstain who drove 0.001 inches behind me today

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-spermstain-who-drove-0-001-inches-behind-me-today/163475>\
**Category:** The BBQ Pit\
**Created:** [March 23, 2003, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-spermstain-who-drove-0-001-inches-behind-me-today/163475 "2003-03-23T02:06:31Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 3\
**Page:** 3

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**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\
**Post date:** [March 25, 2003, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-spermstain-who-drove-0-001-inches-behind-me-today/163475/41 "2003-03-25T14:36:39Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Chimera \*  
> Here in Minnesota, [snip]
> 
> That’s one thing I just don’t understand. Here are two of the more egregious examples;
> 
> On westbound I-94 in western Wisconsin, on a Sunday Morning about 10am, cruise control set at 65, the speed limit. I’m in the right lane, enjoying the morning. Car with three people in it comes screaming up behind me (initially in the left lane) at over 80 mph. Rips over just behind me and hits the brakes.

I think you just answered your own questions there. These people were trying to use you as a radar shield - you’re an out-of-state driver and therefore, in their thinking, more desireable for a cop to pull over than them, as long as the cop sees you (ahead of them) first. Their pissy behavior came about because they wanted you to go faster and still be their radar shield. (When I went to grad school in Minnesota, I left my car registered as a Wisconsin vehicle, partially for this reason - I did a lot of driving in Wisconsin yet and didn’t want to look like an “out-of-state driver”.)

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**Author:** ![Bad\_News\_Baboon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5fc32e/32.png) [@Bad\_News\_Baboon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bad_News_Baboon)\
**Post date:** [March 25, 2003, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-spermstain-who-drove-0-001-inches-behind-me-today/163475/42 "2003-03-25T15:02:36Z")

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I can deal with tailgaters while traffic is in motion by slowing down.  
What reeeeally gets to me is tailgaters at stop lights. On hills.

This one guy was literally one inch away from me and I am still mastering using a clutch!

I went in to complete panic until I just put my emergency lights one and made him go around.

As for the windshield thing:  
My pal had a hatchback and made the discovery that you can rotate the nozzle so that it sprays backward…

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**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\
**Post date:** [March 25, 2003, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-spermstain-who-drove-0-001-inches-behind-me-today/163475/43 "2003-03-25T15:32:12Z")

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In the cases of slowing down, why do people only slow to 40mph? Some tailgaters still won’t get the hint. Why not slow to 35… 30… 25… 20…

Full stop, Mr. Scott.

As for the tailgate marquee, how about this: “If you’re going to fuck me up the ass, can you at least buy me dinner?”

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