# To the U.S. Navy - the USS John P. Murtha is going way too far. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [April 15, 2010, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-u-s-navy-the-uss-john-p-murtha-is-going-way-too-far/536219 "2010-04-15T15:42:03Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2010, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-u-s-navy-the-uss-john-p-murtha-is-going-way-too-far/536219/101 "2010-04-16T16:01:47Z")
Would it be commanded by Captain Peter Peachfuzz? ---
**Author:** ![Icerigger](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/icerigger/32/432_2.png) [@Icerigger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Icerigger)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2010, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-u-s-navy-the-uss-john-p-murtha-is-going-way-too-far/536219/102 "2010-04-16T16:10:04Z")
Admiral Rickover was once taken to task on his support for naming submarines after people instead of the traditional sea creatures. When criticized for breakingsaid tradition he retorted, “fish don’t vote”. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2010, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-u-s-navy-the-uss-john-p-murtha-is-going-way-too-far/536219/103 "2010-04-16T16:14:49Z")
> [@](#): > > HMS Vengeance is a ballistic missile submarine, so in terms of “size,” as defined by how much ass the ship can kick, you really can’t get any bigger than that. Like, in World War II, British ships fought the Germans. HMS Vengeance could incinerate Germany. All of it. A ship that can actually destroy a whole country, man, that’s a ship that has to have a badass name. I got curious so I ran some figures. The HMS Vengeance carries sixteen Trident II missiles. The British arm their Tridents with three warheads and their largest warhead has a 100 kiloton yield. So the Vengeance could launch a total yield of 4800 kilotons. But what’s that mean? Here’s some perspective. During the entire course of WWII, the British and American air forces combined dropped a total of 1588 kilotons of explosives on Germany. Of course that’s only if you’re using British warheads. A Trident II missile can be armed with up to eight warheads and the Americans use W88 warheads which have a 475 kiloton yield. Sixteen Trident II’s armed like that would have a total yield of 60,800 kilotons. ---
**Author:** ![Squink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5e925/32.png) [@Squink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Squink)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2010, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-u-s-navy-the-uss-john-p-murtha-is-going-way-too-far/536219/104 "2010-04-16T16:15:18Z")
> [@Shakester](#): > > …except that it’s spelled [Bullwinkel](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vivian_Bullwinkel). [Creative license:](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Rocky_and_Bullwinkle_Show) > [@](#): > > Bullwinkle’s name came from a friend of Jay Ward’s, Clarence Bullwinkel, who was a property owner/landlord in Berkeley, California and also owned a Chevrolet dealership in Oakland, California. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2010, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-u-s-navy-the-uss-john-p-murtha-is-going-way-too-far/536219/105 "2010-04-16T16:22:35Z")
> [@Terraplane](#): > > They could call it the HMAS Vivian instead. That sounds fine to me. Bonus points if they get Adrian Edmondson to christian it. ---
**Author:** ![MOIDALIZE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e274bd/32.png) [@MOIDALIZE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MOIDALIZE)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2010, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-u-s-navy-the-uss-john-p-murtha-is-going-way-too-far/536219/106 "2010-04-16T16:28:21Z")
Sultry female names only work for bombers. ---
**Author:** ![heatmiserfl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/df705f/32.png) [@heatmiserfl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/heatmiserfl)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2010, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-u-s-navy-the-uss-john-p-murtha-is-going-way-too-far/536219/107 "2010-04-16T17:38:27Z")
> [@RickJay](#): > > HMS Vengeance is a ballistic missile submarine, so in terms of “size,” as defined by how much ass the ship can kick, _you really can’t get any bigger than that._ Like, in World War II, British ships fought the Germans. HMS Vengeance could _incinerate Germany._ All of it. A ship that can actually destroy a whole country, man, that’s a ship that has to have a badass name. > > The U.S. usually names its ballistic missle submarines after states. That sucks. If you’re gonna have a submarine that is designed to kill a hundred million people it should have a name that befits its purpose. I like “USS Deathbringer,”\*\* “USS Skull Crusher”\*\* or “USS Foreigner-Roaster.” OK, I just read this as USS Skull Fucker. :eek: I wanna see a USS Barack HUSSEIN Obama. ---
**Author:** ![sqweels](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f19dbf/32.png) [@sqweels](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sqweels)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2010, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-u-s-navy-the-uss-john-p-murtha-is-going-way-too-far/536219/108 "2010-04-16T19:15:51Z")
I’m not holding my breath that there will ever be a USS Bill Clinton, but if there’s ever a USS George W. Bush, then _I’ll_ drive an explosives-laden suicide boat into it. ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Amazing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6de8d8/32.png) [@Captain\_Amazing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Amazing)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2010, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-u-s-navy-the-uss-john-p-murtha-is-going-way-too-far/536219/109 "2010-04-16T19:29:15Z")
I don’t think Murtha should have had a ship named after him. But, in case anyone is curious, here’s an alphabetical list of ship names: [http://www.nvr.navy.mil/nvrships/NAME.HTM](http://www.nvr.navy.mil/nvrships/NAME.HTM) ---
**Author:** ![Lemur866](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lemur866/32/434_2.png) [@Lemur866](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lemur866)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2010, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-u-s-navy-the-uss-john-p-murtha-is-going-way-too-far/536219/110 "2010-04-16T19:56:48Z")
Now that Murtha’s dead (which I somehow missed until this thread), go nuts. However, a ballistic missle sub named the USS I Am Become Death, Destroyer of Worlds would be cool. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2010, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-u-s-navy-the-uss-john-p-murtha-is-going-way-too-far/536219/111 "2010-04-16T20:04:06Z")
Or you could just name it _Shiva_ and save yourself a bunch of paint. ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2010, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-u-s-navy-the-uss-john-p-murtha-is-going-way-too-far/536219/112 "2010-04-16T21:08:15Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > Or you could just name it _Shiva_ and save yourself a bunch of paint. The Indians names their nuclear-armed ballistic missiles Agni, after the Hindu god of fire. That’s pretty cool. ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Amazing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6de8d8/32.png) [@Captain\_Amazing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Amazing)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2010, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-u-s-navy-the-uss-john-p-murtha-is-going-way-too-far/536219/113 "2010-04-16T23:05:39Z")
I think we should use Culture names for our ships. ---
**Author:** ![Squink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5e925/32.png) [@Squink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Squink)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2010, 11:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-u-s-navy-the-uss-john-p-murtha-is-going-way-too-far/536219/114 "2010-04-16T23:24:54Z")
> [@Captain\_Amazing](#): > > I think we should use Culture names for our ships. **USN _Bacillus anthracis_** would be pretty kick-ass! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![QuardleOodleArdleWardleDoodle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/ecccb3/32.png) [@QuardleOodleArdleWardleDoodle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuardleOodleArdleWardleDoodle)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2010, 12:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-u-s-navy-the-uss-john-p-murtha-is-going-way-too-far/536219/115 "2010-04-17T00:51:28Z")
> [@Captain\_Amazing](#): > > I think we should use Culture names for our ships. The USS Agar. For actual ship names, you pretty much can’t beat HMS Belligerent, which did whatit said on the tin. ---
**Author:** ![Squink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5e925/32.png) [@Squink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Squink)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2010, 1:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-u-s-navy-the-uss-john-p-murtha-is-going-way-too-far/536219/116 "2010-04-17T01:04:24Z")
> [@Captain\_Amazing](#): > > Culture names **Failure of Continence** ---
**Author:** ![Smeghead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f1d935/32.png) [@Smeghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smeghead)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2010, 2:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-u-s-navy-the-uss-john-p-murtha-is-going-way-too-far/536219/117 "2010-04-17T02:31:42Z")
> [@Captain\_Amazing](#): > > I think we should use Culture names for our ships. The **USS Evening Out At The Opera, Followed Perhaps By A Few Cocktails** doesn’t really strike fear into my heart. ---
**Author:** ![Merijeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f05b48/32.png) [@Merijeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merijeek)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2010, 3:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-u-s-navy-the-uss-john-p-murtha-is-going-way-too-far/536219/118 "2010-04-17T03:16:55Z")
> [@Smeghead](#): > > The **USS Evening Out At The Opera, Followed Perhaps By A Few Cocktails** doesn’t really strike fear into my heart. **USS Raging Hangover**? -Joe ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2010, 5:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-u-s-navy-the-uss-john-p-murtha-is-going-way-too-far/536219/119 "2010-04-17T05:08:59Z")
“Admiral, the American ship is heading in our direction.” “Evasive maneuvers, Ensign.” “Sir, it’s the _USS PBS Pledge Drive_! We can’t evade it!” ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2010, 12:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-u-s-navy-the-uss-john-p-murtha-is-going-way-too-far/536219/120 "2010-04-17T12:55:48Z")
> [@Captain\_Amazing](#): > > I think we should use Culture names for our ships. They’re a British group. Perhaps HMS Boy George? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-u-s-navy-the-uss-john-p-murtha-is-going-way-too-far/536219.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-u-s-navy-the-uss-john-p-murtha-is-going-way-too-far/536219.md?page=7)