# To the wackjob at the Girl Scout Cookie sale **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [February 29, 2012, 3:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-wackjob-at-the-girl-scout-cookie-sale/614348 "2012-02-29T15:22:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [February 29, 2012, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-wackjob-at-the-girl-scout-cookie-sale/614348/21 "2012-02-29T17:08:44Z")
You titled this thread ‘To the wackjob at the Girl Scout Cookie sale’ but then didn’t say anything to him in the OP. rant fail. ---
**Author:** ![Barkis\_is\_Willin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a183cd/32.png) [@Barkis\_is\_Willin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Barkis_is_Willin)\ **Post date:** [February 29, 2012, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-wackjob-at-the-girl-scout-cookie-sale/614348/22 "2012-02-29T17:15:00Z")
> [@velvetjones](#): > > That’s pretty much the rule and not the exception for me. In circumstances like that I never think to speak up until much, much later and then I’m just left to sit and stew with indignation. Is your comeback usually along the lines of, “Oh yeah? Well the jerk store called and they’re running out of YOU!” Because if so, history tells us you’re better off stewing with indignation. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [February 29, 2012, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-wackjob-at-the-girl-scout-cookie-sale/614348/23 "2012-02-29T17:17:48Z")
> [@purplehorseshoe](#): > > Pffft. You’ve never in your life been so shocked by something that you’ve been left dumbfounded and speechless? Never thought of the exact right phrase to retort … fifteen minutes after the fact? _Never once?_ I think the technical term for that is the “Oh no you di’in’t” Syndrome. ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [February 29, 2012, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-wackjob-at-the-girl-scout-cookie-sale/614348/24 "2012-02-29T17:18:56Z")
> [@The\_Man\_In\_Black](#): > > with paper towel tubs as an example. What? ---
**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\ **Post date:** [February 29, 2012, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-wackjob-at-the-girl-scout-cookie-sale/614348/25 "2012-02-29T17:20:48Z")
> [@Acsenray](#): > > What? Pleeeeeeeease don’t ask. (It was meant to be “paper towel tubes”, though, as in the cardboard cylinders that paper towels are wrapped around. You don’t want to know. Really.) ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [February 29, 2012, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-wackjob-at-the-girl-scout-cookie-sale/614348/26 "2012-02-29T17:24:34Z")
How much are the paper towel tubs at the dollar store? I need to get a gift for some lesbian friends. ---
**Author:** ![Mollie\_Magill](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mollie_magill/32/20882_2.png) [@Mollie\_Magill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mollie_Magill)\ **Post date:** [February 29, 2012, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-wackjob-at-the-girl-scout-cookie-sale/614348/27 "2012-02-29T17:26:08Z")
> [@elbows](#): > > This is far more disturbing than some cranky old man being opinionated, to me. Why wouldn’t you just speak up? And why not scold him in front of the girls he spoke with, that seems way more appropriate than doing it discreetly. > > Seems like a missed opportunity to actually teach them some leadership skills, to me. And isn’t that what GG is supposed to be about? > > What’s so hard about interrupting him to say, “Sir, please stop. If you wish to express you views on this issue, please contact GGUSA, this is an inappropriate conversation to have with children. Thank you so much.” You’re the adults, after all. Complaining about it, after neglecting to actually speak up, seems kind of lame. Because it’s much easier to say, after the fact, “If I were there…” than it is to actually be in a situation so out of the ordinary that your brain freezes up, because it cannot fathom that a crazy person is unloading on a bunch of little girls. ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Knig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@Typo\_Knig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Knig)\ **Post date:** [February 29, 2012, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-wackjob-at-the-girl-scout-cookie-sale/614348/28 "2012-02-29T17:32:06Z")
> [@bup](#): > > You titled this thread ‘To the wackjob at the Girl Scout Cookie sale’ but then didn’t say anything to him in the OP. > > rant fail. Try to keep up - see Post # 3, et seq. Also, DNFTT, particularly in real life. ---
**Author:** ![JeffB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jeffb/32/188_2.png) [@JeffB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JeffB)\ **Post date:** [February 29, 2012, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-wackjob-at-the-girl-scout-cookie-sale/614348/29 "2012-02-29T17:35:41Z")
> [@saoirse](#): > > This is just another example of how Republicans are making them elves look like assholes by looking for culture wars to engage in. It would be depressing if it weren’t so funny. Yeah, what did those elves ever do to deserve that? ---
**Author:** ![DiosaBellissima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a8b319/32.png) [@DiosaBellissima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiosaBellissima)\ **Post date:** [February 29, 2012, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-wackjob-at-the-girl-scout-cookie-sale/614348/30 "2012-02-29T17:37:24Z")
> [@Dangerosa](#): > > But I did my Girl Scout Leader Sworn Duty to further the agenda of acceptance. Well done! 🙂 Around here, it seems like getting Girl Scout cookies is something akin to attempting to find out information about Skull and Bones. I live in Southern California, so there is literally zero logical reason why the kids shouldn’t be wandering the streets in the beautiful sunshine, frolicking and spreading their harlot abortionist ways. I recall years ago, the girls literally coming door to door, though I understand why the kibosh has perhaps been put on that. What makes no sense to me is that I can’t just go on the website, put in my zip code, and it tells me when and where I can show up and hand over my money. Now, I do have some friends with Girl Scout children, so I can handle it that way. But what if I didn’t? I suppose I feel like they’d make a lot more cash with a slightly better PR team (at least around here)-- the whole city should know it’s cookie time and there should be a handy place where info on where cookie dispensaries are. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [February 29, 2012, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-wackjob-at-the-girl-scout-cookie-sale/614348/31 "2012-02-29T17:37:28Z")
> [@purplehorseshoe](#): > > Pffft. You’ve never in your life been so shocked by something that you’ve been left dumbfounded and speechless? Never thought of the exact right phrase to retort … fifteen minutes after the fact? _Never once?_ As I [once said](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=14401903&postcount=255) of another poster, he has so much _savoir-faire_ that his _l’esprit de l’escalier_ hits when he’s still _à l’étage noble_. God. Reduced to quoting myself? Bad sign. ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [February 29, 2012, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-wackjob-at-the-girl-scout-cookie-sale/614348/32 "2012-02-29T17:37:31Z")
> [@Kimstu](#): > > Pleeeeeeeease don’t ask. (It was meant to be “paper towel tubes”, though, as in the cardboard cylinders that paper towels are wrapped around. You don’t want to know. Really.) Sure, I do! ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [February 29, 2012, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-wackjob-at-the-girl-scout-cookie-sale/614348/33 "2012-02-29T17:44:42Z")
> [@Mama\_Zappa](#): > > This crazy old man somehow felt it was appropriate to spew that kind of filth in front of a couple of GIRL SCOUTS. > > We adults were dumbfounded. I really wish I’d had the presence of mind to take him aside and scold him for saying things like that in front of the children. But then you saw the Secret Service agents around him and realized it was Newt Gingrich. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [February 29, 2012, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-wackjob-at-the-girl-scout-cookie-sale/614348/34 "2012-02-29T17:46:25Z")
> [@Mama\_Zappa](#): > > So we had a “booth sale” yesterday (where you set up a table and sell cookies at a well-traveled spot). > > And our first customer - well, the first person that approached us, as he did NOT make a purchase - felt it important to share with us just WHY he chose not to buy cookies. Clearly he’s read the spiel by that Indiana congressman and decided to take things a bit further. > > Our girls were treated to a lecture about how GSUSA promotes female homosexuality (no, we don’t actually, otherwise why would we need to promote abortions?). And not just that but the entire Democratic party has taken over the government to promote their homosexual agenda. This of course explains why Barack Obama is bisexual and his daughters are gay. > > Oh wait - excuse me, my daughter later corrected me on that last bit. They’re not gay, but Barry O is committing incest with them. > > And no, I’m not making any of that up. I couldn’t dream that shit up. > > This crazy old man somehow felt it was appropriate to spew that kind of filth in front of a couple of GIRL SCOUTS. > > We adults were dumbfounded. I really wish I’d had the presence of mind to take him aside and scold him for saying things like that in front of the children. In the movie _The Road to Morocco_, Bing and Bob are stranded in a bazaar in Morocco, without a penny (dinar) to their names, and they see a man jibbering to himself, wandering among the stalls and carts, and helping himself to the foods that the various merchants are peddling. Bing and Bob try to take advantage of what they think is a free Levantine smorgasbord, and they nearly lose their left hands in the process (don’t worry, this story really IS going somewhere). The merchant lets them go, but he explains why the crazy guy gets to just take stuff. In this culture, madness is accepted as a sign that the person has been touched by Allah. Thus, by extension, giving him your merchandise without charging him is considered an act of piety, and a way of honoring the person’s direct connection with the Divine. Back to the cookie sale: you really should have given the guy a box of Thin Mints and sent him on his way. ---
**Author:** ![guizot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guizot/32/3636_2.png) [@guizot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/guizot)\ **Post date:** [February 29, 2012, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-wackjob-at-the-girl-scout-cookie-sale/614348/35 "2012-02-29T17:47:56Z")
> [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](#): > > I asked how much that would cost and the (I’m guessing) seven year old came right back with $7. WHAT??!!! I paid $4 a box! Were those “girls” skimming something off of the price they charged me? And I’d like to add that “Tagalogs” are pretty disappointing. Next time, I’ll stick with Thin Mints, which seem to be the only cookie they can get right. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [February 29, 2012, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-wackjob-at-the-girl-scout-cookie-sale/614348/36 "2012-02-29T17:51:01Z")
> [@guizot](#): > > And I’d like to add that “Tagalogs” are pretty disappointing. Nitpick: the cookies are called “Tagalongs.” “Tagalog” is the language spoken by the people who bake them. ---
**Author:** ![elbows](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b3f665/32.png) [@elbows](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elbows)\ **Post date:** [February 29, 2012, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-wackjob-at-the-girl-scout-cookie-sale/614348/37 "2012-02-29T17:51:29Z")
Sorry, I have no qualms with people not always having a snappy retort, of course. And certainly I have also thought of the perfect thing to say, too late. But when you’re supervising young girls, out in public, I think it behooves you to speak up. I don’t care if you say the ‘right’ thing, but I do care that you have the ovaries to speak up and say _something_. If you’re too timid or shy, then let someone else cover this duty maybe. Were it my daughter, being subjected to this guys rant, and the adult just stood there, saying nothing, I’d be less than delighted, I think. ---
**Author:** ![Mollie\_Magill](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mollie_magill/32/20882_2.png) [@Mollie\_Magill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mollie_Magill)\ **Post date:** [February 29, 2012, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-wackjob-at-the-girl-scout-cookie-sale/614348/38 "2012-02-29T17:51:29Z")
> [@guizot](#): > > WHAT??!!! I paid $4 a box! Were those “girls” skimming something off of the price they charged me? > > And I’d like to add that “Tagalogs” are pretty disappointing. Next time, I’ll stick with Thin Mints, which seem to be the only cookie they can get right. I suspect that it’s been several years since **Tapioca Dextrin** bought cookies. ---
**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\ **Post date:** [February 29, 2012, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-wackjob-at-the-girl-scout-cookie-sale/614348/39 "2012-02-29T17:51:35Z")
> [@Typo\_Knig](#): > > Try to keep up - see Post # 3, et seq. Also, DNFTT, particularly in real life. No, what I think **bup** meant by “rant fail” was that the OP didn’t **address** the OP to the object of the OP’s wrath in the second person, if you see what I mean. According to the conventions of the “To the…:” rant genre, **Mama Zappa** shoulda launched into her OP with something along the lines of _“Listen, you fetid snot-crusted crazy old loon, where the FUCK did you get the idea that it was okay to give my Scouts a lecture on the GSUSA ‘homosexual agenda’…”_ Instead, she gave us all a rationally narrated description of the incident that was distressingly lacking in profanity. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [February 29, 2012, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-wackjob-at-the-girl-scout-cookie-sale/614348/40 "2012-02-29T17:53:33Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > I swear, if someone invents a time machine it will be to solve just this problem. 😃 Too bad the webcomic _Casey and Andy_ is no longer being put up. They’d be able to whip together a “Staircase-Wit-O-Mat” just like _that_. 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-wackjob-at-the-girl-scout-cookie-sale/614348.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/to-the-wackjob-at-the-girl-scout-cookie-sale/614348.md?page=3)