# Today's Improbable Headline.

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/todays-improbable-headline/598615>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [October 4, 2011, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/todays-improbable-headline/598615 "2011-10-04T21:24:37Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 10\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\
**Post date:** [October 4, 2011, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/todays-improbable-headline/598615/1 "2011-10-04T21:24:37Z")

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Amanda Knox to have Hank Williams Jr.'s love child !!! "

What else?

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**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\
**Post date:** [October 4, 2011, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/todays-improbable-headline/598615/2 "2011-10-04T21:28:18Z")

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Has she slept with Sarah Palin yet? Or Casey Anthony?

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**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\
**Post date:** [October 4, 2011, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/todays-improbable-headline/598615/3 "2011-10-04T21:38:32Z")

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**Chris Christie Arrested at Occupy Wall Street Protest**

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**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\
**Post date:** [October 4, 2011, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/todays-improbable-headline/598615/4 "2011-10-04T21:53:28Z")

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Rick Perry Publishes New Autobiography Titled: _Niggerhead_

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**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\
**Post date:** [October 4, 2011, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/todays-improbable-headline/598615/5 "2011-10-04T22:05:57Z")

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Separated at birth: Dr. Conrad Murray and F. Murray Abraham

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**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\
**Post date:** [October 4, 2011, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/todays-improbable-headline/598615/6 "2011-10-04T22:14:10Z")

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Yanno what? I’m reading this… and suddenly sense a Regulation coming on.

Headline needs to apply only to today’s names and stories. That’ll keep it fresh day after day for those who’re drawn to a bit of wordplay.

My last post doesn’t really belong. :smack:

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**Author:** ![AskNott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asknott/32/5790_2.png) [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)\
**Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/todays-improbable-headline/598615/7 "2011-10-05T01:14:37Z")

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**Texas Rangers win, Break the Hearts of Rays-ists.**

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**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\
**Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/todays-improbable-headline/598615/8 "2011-10-05T01:51:01Z")

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SF Giants: We Coulda Been a Contendah!

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**Author:** ![Dahnlor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dahnlor/32/533_2.png) [@Dahnlor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dahnlor)\
**Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 3:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/todays-improbable-headline/598615/9 "2011-10-05T03:44:03Z")

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Amanda Knox Interested In iPhone 4S

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**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\
**Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 4:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/todays-improbable-headline/598615/10 "2011-10-05T04:04:29Z")

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Actually, I can’t think of a less probable headline than the one that WILL appear in newspapers all over America tomorrow morning:  
**A.J. BURNETT COMES THROUGH IN CLUTCH, AND BAILS OUT YANKEES!**