# &%#^(~+\* toddlers! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 16, 2003, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/toddlers/219329 "2003-12-16T16:24:20Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2003, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/toddlers/219329/1 "2003-12-16T16:24:20Z")
At a friend’s house recently. There were other guests, including a half a dozen people whose age doesn’t total 17. Ross is 4, and learning his ABCs. He knows C is for Cat, and D is for Dog. “What’s **Q** foah?” (Ross hasn’t mastered **R** s yet.) “Q is for words that start with the _kwuh_ sound.” Thoughtful pause. Brightens. “I know a wo’d that stah’ts with kwuh!! –_CWAP!_” ---
**Author:** ![luluBahrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e5b9ba/32.png) [@luluBahrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/luluBahrain)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2003, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/toddlers/219329/2 "2003-12-16T17:18:48Z")
AAAAWWWWWWWWW! ---
**Author:** ![MsRobyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/90ced4/32.png) [@MsRobyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsRobyn)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2003, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/toddlers/219329/3 "2003-12-16T17:34:52Z")
I don’t know if you thought it was cute or if you’re complaining, but blame the parents and/or caregivers. He picked it up from them. Robin ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2003, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/toddlers/219329/4 "2003-12-16T17:47:55Z")
My sister became very aware of her language when her toddler daughter dropped the F-bomb. I heard the story second hand and still almost choked from laughing… ---
**Author:** ![Scarlett67](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scarlett67/32/7387_2.png) [@Scarlett67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scarlett67)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2003, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/toddlers/219329/5 "2003-12-16T18:00:42Z")
I once witnessed a ~4-year-old trying to beat up on her teenage sister and calling her a bitch and a fucker. We all know that she picked up that language from her mother. Quite a show. ---
**Author:** ![bayonet1976](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/77aa72/32.png) [@bayonet1976](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bayonet1976)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2003, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/toddlers/219329/6 "2003-12-16T18:06:07Z")
Well, my 6 year just told Santa that he learned to say the F word from me and the S word from his mom. He also told Santa that I make faces at him when I’m pumping gas. When I asked him later why he did that, he said because he wanted to make sure Santa knew about the naughty things his dad does. I’m guessing he was hoping to establish a grading curve. That kid is bound to end up practicing law or in politics. ---
**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2003, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/toddlers/219329/7 "2003-12-16T18:35:13Z")
My nephew once called his sister a “Bee eye tee see aitch.” Had no idea what it meant; just thought it was a five-syllable word his dad used when he was mad at his mom. Then there was the time I was in a Saturday matinee audience to see “The Lion King.” Big opening number, “The Circle of Life,” builds to a crashing climax, followed by a beat of silence. Into which was interjected, from a few rows down and to the left of me, a tiny–but bell-clear–toddler voice: “What the _f\_\_k_ was THAT?” Hysterical pandemonium for a GOOD ten minutes. ---
**Author:** ![luluBahrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e5b9ba/32.png) [@luluBahrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/luluBahrain)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2003, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/toddlers/219329/8 "2003-12-16T19:01:52Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by MsRobyn \* > \*\*I don’t know if you thought it was cute or if you’re complaining, but blame the parents and/or caregivers. He picked it up from them. > > Robin \*\* I thought it was cute. I wouldn’t think it was so cute if it was the f-bomb or something along those lines. But “Cwap” is just cute. ---
**Author:** ![Ol\_Gaffer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Ol\_Gaffer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ol_Gaffer)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2003, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/toddlers/219329/9 "2003-12-16T19:11:50Z")
Last month, my two year old dropped a cup of juice on the floor, slapped his forehead and exclaimed “Godamnit!” The Mrs. and I about died. It wasn’t so much the vocabulary choice (although that was hilarious as well), but rather how completely situationally appropriate it was. ---
**Author:** ![cher3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/da6949/32.png) [@cher3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cher3)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2003, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/toddlers/219329/10 "2003-12-16T19:18:11Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by MsRobyn \* > \*\*I don’t know if you thought it was cute or if you’re complaining, but blame the parents and/or caregivers. He picked it up from them. > > Robin \*\* Not necessarily. Neither I, nor my husband, nor, I suspect, my son’s preschool teachers are in the habit of calling anyone “weinerface.” ---
**Author:** ![misstee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/958977/32.png) [@misstee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/misstee)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2003, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/toddlers/219329/11 "2003-12-16T19:30:49Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Ol’Gaffer \* > \*\*Last month, my two year old dropped a cup of juice on the floor, slapped his forehead and exclaimed “Godamnit!” The Mrs. and I about died. It wasn’t so much the vocabulary choice (although that was hilarious as well), but rather how completely situationally appropriate it was. \*\* I posted a while back that my kids will not be punished for saying things as long as it is in the appropriate context. ---
**Author:** ![An\_Arky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/87869e/32.png) [@An\_Arky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/An_Arky)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2003, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/toddlers/219329/12 "2003-12-16T20:01:17Z")
About three years ago, I was driving with my then two-year-old riding in his carseat in the back. Someone pulled out in front of me (a very frequent occurence in the driving-and-manners-challenged DC metro area) and from the back an angelic voice chimed… “Fucker” …just like his old man…geez, I’m getting all misty…😃 ---
**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2003, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/toddlers/219329/13 "2003-12-16T22:36:18Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Ol’Gaffer \* > \*\*Last month, my two year old dropped a cup of juice on the floor, slapped his forehead and exclaimed “Godamnit!” The Mrs. and I about died. It wasn’t so much the vocabulary choice (although that was hilarious as well), but rather how completely situationally appropriate it was. \*\* Same nephew came into the kitchen, flustered. Looks under the table, heaves a defeated sigh. Looks behind the refrigerator, scratches his head. Starts looking in each of the shoes piled by the door, muttering in frustration. His mom goes, “Christopher, what’s wrong?” Sigh, slaps his thigh in pique. Laments: “I can’t find my fuckin’ rocket.” Mom snorts, says to me, “Well, at least he’s using the word right.” ---
**Author:** ![bughunter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/aeb1de/32.png) [@bughunter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bughunter)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2003, 10:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/toddlers/219329/14 "2003-12-16T22:54:18Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by lissener \* > \*\*“I know a wo’d that stah’ts with kwuh!! –_CWAP!_” \*\* I hope you got that on videotape! ---
**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2003, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/toddlers/219329/15 "2003-12-16T22:59:47Z")
Nah, all the ten thousand dollar moments happen when the camera is dark. ---
**Author:** ![Ol\_Gaffer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Ol\_Gaffer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ol_Gaffer)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2003, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/toddlers/219329/16 "2003-12-16T23:00:46Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by lissener \* > \*\*Same nephew came into the kitchen, flustered. Looks under the table, heaves a defeated sigh. Looks behind the refrigerator, scratches his head. Starts looking in each of the shoes piled by the door, muttering in frustration. His mom goes, “Christopher, what’s wrong?” > > Sigh, slaps his thigh in pique. Laments: “I can’t find my fuckin’ rocket.” > > Mom snorts, says to me, “Well, at least he’s using the word right.” \*\* HA!. That’s classic. We told the story to my sister-in-law and she asked if we had punished him. I answered “How can we punish him when he’s just repeating Daddy’s favorite word?” ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2003, 11:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/toddlers/219329/17 "2003-12-18T11:46:44Z")
**lissener** and **Ol’Gaffer** , are you guys related, and talking about the same kid? ---
**Author:** ![China\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/779978/32.png) [@China\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/China_Guy)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2003, 12:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/toddlers/219329/18 "2003-12-18T12:27:54Z")
I am amazed that China bambina hasn’t learned any swear words in English yet. I’m a gutter mouth but have tried hard in her presence. She does swear a fair amount in both mandarin and shanghaiese, and it’s her goddamn grandmother that’s teaching her that. ---
**Author:** ![Ol\_Gaffer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Ol\_Gaffer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ol_Gaffer)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2003, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/toddlers/219329/19 "2003-12-18T17:31:37Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Rilchiam \* > \*\ ***lissener** and **Ol’Gaffer** , are you guys related, and talking about the same kid? \*\* I don’t think so but let me check… **lissener** are you a sports editor with a big dog named Thor? ---
**Author:** ![JohnBckWLD](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/d6d6ee/32.png) [@JohnBckWLD](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnBckWLD)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2003, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/toddlers/219329/20 "2003-12-18T18:38:40Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by MsRobyn \* > **He picked it up from them.** Better he picks up cwap at home than picking it up off the streets. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/toddlers/219329.md?page=2)