# Tom Cruise vs The Martians **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [August 15, 2004, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-cruise-vs-the-martians/260019 "2004-08-15T23:47:34Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2004, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-cruise-vs-the-martians/260019/1 "2004-08-15T23:47:34Z")
[Spielberg’s directing, so it has potential.](http://www.astrobio.net/news/modules.php?op=modload&name=News&file=article&sid=1135&mode=thread&order=0&thold=0) > [@](#): > > Steven Spielberg and Tom Cruise will bring the classic H.G. Wells alien-invasion novel, “The War of the Worlds”, to the big screen, with Cruise expected to star, according to Variety magazine. The movie version has been accelerated onto a fast track, with only 10 weeks of pre-production scheduled before the film goes into shooting later this year. It’ll be interesting to see how they do it. Hopefully, they’ll be entirely faithful to the book, and won’t try to update it for modern times. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2004, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-cruise-vs-the-martians/260019/2 "2004-08-15T23:53:58Z")
Does it have tripods? I’m not going if it doesn’t have tripods. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d26b3c/32.png) [@Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Blue_Sky)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2004, 11:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-cruise-vs-the-martians/260019/3 "2004-08-15T23:54:04Z")
Well, that’s $10 of my money Spielberg won’t be getting. Why Tom Cruise? Why? ---
**Author:** ![Hail\_Ants](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/dc4da7/32.png) [@Hail\_Ants](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hail_Ants)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2004, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-cruise-vs-the-martians/260019/4 "2004-08-15T23:59:08Z")
Well, it’ll be hard to keep them as ‘Martians’ (i.e. actually coming from Mars) without that coming off as silly (they could name the lead alien Marvin!) Mars is too familiar a place compared to what it was a century ago. I find this interesting because I can remember that back when that **vile, inane, worthless, piece of shit WOTW ripoff** known as **Independence Day** came out Spielberg was quoted as saying he would never make a movie like that. That is, a movie where aliens were merciless invaders rather than altruistic visitors. Hope he’s changed his mind. ---
**Author:** ![teela\_brown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d9b06d/32.png) [@teela\_brown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teela_brown)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2004, 12:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-cruise-vs-the-martians/260019/5 "2004-08-16T00:09:53Z")
I would hope they keep the Martians as alien as they feel in the book. I remember having the urine scared out of me as a kid when I read the Martian feeding scene, with the young boy and the hooting and all. If SS turns the Martians into just some more slick-looking humanoids with overdesigned technical toys and lots of explosions, it’s going to be another yawnfest. And I detest Tom Cruise. ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2004, 12:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-cruise-vs-the-martians/260019/6 "2004-08-16T00:21:24Z")
This could work if it was steampunk, and/or period piece. Kinda like Ray Harryhausen had planned. Which means, of course, that it’s going to star Marlon Wayans as one of the Martians. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2004, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-cruise-vs-the-martians/260019/7 "2004-08-16T02:49:14Z")
> [@Hail Ants](#): > > Well, it’ll be hard to keep them as ‘Martians’ (i.e. actually coming from Mars) without that coming off as silly (they could name the lead alien Marvin!) Mars is too familiar a place compared to what it was a century ago. So? There’s a _John Carter of Mars_ movie in the works, isn’t there? ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2004, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-cruise-vs-the-martians/260019/8 "2004-08-16T02:52:01Z")
> [@Tuckerfan](#): > > Hopefully, they’ll be entirely faithful to the book, and won’t try to update it for modern times. What I hope is that they’re faithful to the **book** and not Orson Welles’ radio adaptation – i.e., the Martians first land in England near the turn of the century, not New Jersey in 1938. ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2004, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-cruise-vs-the-martians/260019/9 "2004-08-16T03:15:28Z")
> [@BrainGlutton](#): > > So? There’s a _John Carter of Mars_ movie in the works, isn’t there? There was, with Cruise picked to play John Carter, but I’ve not heard anything more about it in ages. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Long\_Road](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b5a626/32.png) [@The\_Long\_Road](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Long_Road)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2004, 3:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-cruise-vs-the-martians/260019/10 "2004-08-16T03:16:12Z")
I also hope it goes along the lines of the book and is set in England. I fear the following plot: The martians will invade us because our probes are spreading germs on their planet. The germs are killing them off so they are fighting back for their survival. Tom Cruise somehow gets a message from them or figures it out from some evidence he finds. He tries to explain to everyone that the Martians are only defending themselves. Near the end, humans kills the Martians but Tom Cruise feels all guilty because humans are barbaric and the poor Martians were only trying to defend themselves. ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2004, 3:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-cruise-vs-the-martians/260019/11 "2004-08-16T03:21:42Z")
> [@The Long Road](#): > > I also hope it goes along the lines of the book and is set in England. > > I fear the following plot: The martians will invade us because our probes are spreading germs on their planet. The germs are killing them off so they are fighting back for their survival. Tom Cruise somehow gets a message from them or figures it out from some evidence he finds. He tries to explain to everyone that the Martians are only defending themselves. Near the end, humans kills the Martians but Tom Cruise feels all guilty because humans are barbaric and the poor Martians were only trying to defend themselves. Dude, do you write for Hollywood? Because that’s so close to the kind of crap Hollywood spews out, it’s scary. The only thing you’ve forgotten is the romantic interest for Cruise. ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2004, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-cruise-vs-the-martians/260019/12 "2004-08-16T03:46:44Z")
When was Spielberg’s last big hit? ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2004, 3:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-cruise-vs-the-martians/260019/13 "2004-08-16T03:52:01Z")
> [@astro](#): > > When was Spielberg’s last big hit? As a WAG, I’d say _Saving Private Ryan_, which would have been 1998. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Bravo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_bravo/32/493_2.png) [@Johnny\_Bravo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Bravo)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2004, 3:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-cruise-vs-the-martians/260019/14 "2004-08-16T03:54:21Z")
Was The Terminal a hit? I liked it, anyway. ---
**Author:** ![Tangent](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tangent/32/3098_2.png) [@Tangent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tangent)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2004, 5:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-cruise-vs-the-martians/260019/15 "2004-08-16T05:03:05Z")
> [@astro](#): > > When was Spielberg’s last big hit? **Minority Report** (also with Cruise) did pretty well, didn’t it? ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2004, 5:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-cruise-vs-the-martians/260019/16 "2004-08-16T05:27:28Z")
> [@The Long Road](#): > > I also hope it goes along the lines of the book and is set in England. > > I fear the following plot: The martians will invade us because our probes are spreading germs on their planet. The germs are killing them off so they are fighting back for their survival. Tom Cruise somehow gets a message from them or figures it out from some evidence he finds. He tries to explain to everyone that the Martians are only defending themselves. Near the end, humans kills the Martians but Tom Cruise feels all guilty because humans are barbaric and the poor Martians were only trying to defend themselves. That, or he’ll make some kind of “Martians Invading Earth”/“U.S. Invading Iraq” analogy. In which case, I’ll have to have a cornea transplant after badly scratching my eyes in the tops of my sockets. ---
**Author:** ![bienville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4bbf92/32.png) [@bienville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bienville)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2004, 7:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-cruise-vs-the-martians/260019/17 "2004-08-16T07:44:10Z")
> [@Ranchoth](#): > > it’s going to star Marlon Wayans as one of the Martians. Ah, but he’d never fill his brother’s furry shoes! And they’d have to cast Jim Carrey’s brother and Jeff Goldblum’s brother as his shipmates! _Because I’m blonde I don’t have to think I talk like a baby and I don’t pay for drinks I don’t have to worry about getting a man As long as I keep this blonde and keep these tan!_ ---
**Author:** ![pool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pool/32/4152_2.png) [@pool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pool)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2004, 7:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-cruise-vs-the-martians/260019/18 "2004-08-16T07:55:20Z")
I hope they stay faithful to the book cause it was really fun to read a while back when that time machine movie came out I had high hopes and they completely changed the book with all that nonsense about him trying to save his lost love and shit ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2004, 8:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-cruise-vs-the-martians/260019/19 "2004-08-16T08:00:47Z")
I think _Saving Private Ryan_ was the last really _good_ movie Spielberg has made. Since then he’s had a string of fair to middlin’ movies but nothing really great. I though _Minority Report_ was just ok and it didn’t really hold my interest on repeated viewings. The very best Spielberg movies are movies you can watch over and over and over agian and still enjoy (_Jaws, Close Encounters, ET, Raiders, Schindler’s List, Saving Private Ryan_). He hasn’t really knocked one out of the park like that for a while and I’m not sure if this is the film to do it with. I think there are really only two approaches to take to this source material. Either do an _I Robot_ thing and simply dump everything but the title and the basic concept updated to modern day (and probably with the Martians not being Martians) or do like a _Sky Captain_ thing and do a retro-science fiction piece which is loyal to Wells’ book and winks a little bit at some of its dated ideas. I would prefer the seconf approach but my guess is that the studio’s going to want an overblown, popcorn CGI fest with big name actors and no plot. ---
**Author:** ![Ponster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponster/32/17081_2.png) [@Ponster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponster)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2004, 8:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-cruise-vs-the-martians/260019/20 "2004-08-16T08:02:58Z")
> [@Tangent](#): > > **Minority Report** (also with Cruise) did pretty well, didn’t it? It made about $130 million from what I can goggle which puts it in the same division as **Troy** and **I, Robot** [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-cruise-vs-the-martians/260019.md?page=2)