# Tom DeLay: "God Wrote the Constitution" **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 22, 2014, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-delay-god-wrote-the-constitution/689027 "2014-05-22T20:11:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Superdude](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/superdude/32/13450_2.png) [@Superdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superdude)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2014, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-delay-god-wrote-the-constitution/689027/1 "2014-05-22T20:11:00Z")
God, this fucking idiot gets on my everlovin’ nerves. Tom DeLay, that paradigm of logic, has now stated that [“God wrote the Constitution.”](http://www.mysanantonio.com/news/local/article/Tom-DeLay-God-wrote-the-Constitution-5256148.php) From the article, my favorite bit: “James Madison, the lead author of the United States Constitution and the fourth president of the United States who died in 1836, could not be reached for comment.” I really have no more words to express my outrage/hatred of this man, and his ideals. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2014, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-delay-god-wrote-the-constitution/689027/2 "2014-05-22T20:17:10Z")
“Thus Saith the Lord of Hosts: The Migration or Importation of such Persons as any of the States now existing shall think proper to admit, shall not be prohibited by the Congress prior to the Year one thousand eight hundred and eight, but a Tax or duty may be imposed on such Importation, not exceeding ten dollars for each Person.” – Book of Importations, 1:9 ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2014, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-delay-god-wrote-the-constitution/689027/3 "2014-05-22T20:40:14Z")
Thou shalt not impose a levy of eight dollars, nor a levy of nine dollars excepting that thou shalt then continue the levy unto ten dollars. ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2014, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-delay-god-wrote-the-constitution/689027/4 "2014-05-22T20:43:02Z")
In CCD we were taught that God wrote the bible. He may have used others as his instrument but he was the actual author. If you believe that it is not a big leap to think he also could have authored the Constitution or The Great Gatsby or Shades of Grey if he chose to. No I do not believe that myself. ---
**Author:** ![Trinopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/2bfe46/32.png) [@Trinopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trinopus)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2014, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-delay-god-wrote-the-constitution/689027/5 "2014-05-22T20:43:15Z")
Well, no, impossible! The Constitution isn’t written in Jacobean English, with thees and thous. Only King James’s English is the real voice of God. (All that Hebrew and Greek crap? First drafts.) ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2014, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-delay-god-wrote-the-constitution/689027/6 "2014-05-22T20:50:45Z")
> [@Loach](#): > > In CCD we were taught that God wrote the bible. He may have used others as his instrument but he was the actual author. If you believe that it is not a big leap to think he also could have authored the Constitution or The Great Gatsby or Shades of Grey if he chose to. Thus God was in favor of the “3/5 of a human” compromise, and every other imperfection in the original document. Yep. ---
**Author:** ![Procrustus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/procrustus/32/2994_2.png) [@Procrustus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Procrustus)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2014, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-delay-god-wrote-the-constitution/689027/7 "2014-05-22T20:52:04Z")
> [@bup](#): > > Thus God was in favor of the “3/5 of a human” compromise, and every other imperfection in the original document. > > Yep. Did he draft the amendments? Why not get it right the first time? ---
**Author:** ![Roderick\_Femm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/roderick_femm/32/14875_2.png) [@Roderick\_Femm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roderick_Femm)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2014, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-delay-god-wrote-the-constitution/689027/8 "2014-05-22T20:53:07Z")
Indeed, how dare we make any amendments at all (or perhaps Og is having second thoughts all the time about how he might have done it better). ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2014, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-delay-god-wrote-the-constitution/689027/9 "2014-05-22T21:10:30Z")
From the OP’s article: > [@](#): > > James Madison, the lead author of the United States Constitution and the fourth president of the United States who died in 1836, could not be reached for comment. That’s the funniest damn thing I’ve seen all day. Maybe I should get out more. ---
**Author:** ![Euphonious\_Polemic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/euphonious_polemic/32/3002_2.png) [@Euphonious\_Polemic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Euphonious_Polemic)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2014, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-delay-god-wrote-the-constitution/689027/10 "2014-05-22T21:10:30Z")
> [@Ludovic](#): > > Thou shalt not impose a levy of eight dollars, nor a levy of nine dollars excepting that thou shalt then continue the levy unto ten dollars. Eleven is RIGHT OUT. ---
**Author:** ![Onomatopoeia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/onomatopoeia/32/4145_2.png) [@Onomatopoeia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Onomatopoeia)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2014, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-delay-god-wrote-the-constitution/689027/11 "2014-05-22T21:21:05Z")
> [@Superdude](#): > > God, this fucking idiot gets on my everlovin’ nerves. Tom DeLay, that paradigm of logic, has now stated that [“God wrote the Constitution.”](http://www.mysanantonio.com/news/local/article/Tom-DeLay-God-wrote-the-Constitution-5256148.php) > > From the article, my favorite bit: > > “James Madison, the lead author of the United States Constitution and the fourth president of the United States who died in 1836, could not be reached for comment.” > > I really have no more words to express my outrage/hatred of this man, and his ideals. GON. ParaGON of logic. Just sayin… But yeah, Delay is an idiot. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2014, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-delay-god-wrote-the-constitution/689027/12 "2014-05-22T21:38:51Z")
> [@BrainGlutton](#): > > “Thus Saith the Lord of Hosts: The Migration or Importation of such Persons as any of the States now existing shall think proper to admit, shall not be prohibited by the Congress prior to the Year one thousand eight hundred and eight, but a Tax or duty may be imposed on such Importation, not exceeding ten dollars for each Person.” > > – Book of Importations, 1:9 My favorite part of the movie is where James Madison goes up the mountain to bring down the tablets inscribed with the Ten Amendments. ---
**Author:** ![Skammer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skammer/32/143_2.png) [@Skammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skammer)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2014, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-delay-god-wrote-the-constitution/689027/13 "2014-05-22T21:42:11Z")
“James Madison, the lead author of the United States Constitution and the fourth president of the United States who died in 1836, could not be reached for comment.” Weird how many presidents died that year. Gotta watch those missing commas. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2014, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-delay-god-wrote-the-constitution/689027/14 "2014-05-22T22:07:16Z")
> [@CalMeacham](#): > > My favorite part of the movie is where James Madison goes up the mountain to bring down the tablets inscribed with the Ten Amendments. [Oh, yeah, that’s another thing . . .](http://www.salon.com/2013/06/20/the_secret_history_of_the_bill_of_rights/) ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2014, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-delay-god-wrote-the-constitution/689027/15 "2014-05-22T22:25:39Z")
> [@CalMeacham](#): > > My favorite part of the movie is where James Madison goes up the mountain to bring down the tablets inscribed with the Ten Amendments. And another thing. Twelve Amendments were originally proposed, but only 10 were ratified (at least until an 11th was ratified in 1992). I wonder who wrote the Amendments that didn’t get ratified? ---
**Author:** ![Superdude](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/superdude/32/13450_2.png) [@Superdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superdude)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2014, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-delay-god-wrote-the-constitution/689027/16 "2014-05-22T22:38:30Z")
> [@Onomatopoeia](#): > > GON. ParaGON of logic. Just sayin… > > But yeah, Delay is an idiot. Woosh. I used “paradigm” intentionally, as an allegory that DeLay doesn’t quote get it, either. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2014, 10:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-delay-god-wrote-the-constitution/689027/17 "2014-05-22T22:47:48Z")
> [@Superdude](#): > > Woosh. I used “paradigm” intentionally, as an allegory that DeLay doesn’t quote get it, either. He’s really more of a paraGOON . . . ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2014, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-delay-god-wrote-the-constitution/689027/18 "2014-05-22T22:48:55Z")
> [@Colibri](#): > > And another thing. Twelve Amendments were originally proposed, but only 10 were ratified (at least until an 11th was ratified in 1992). > > I wonder who wrote the Amendments that didn’t get ratified? Why, the Prince of Lies, of course! (I.e., either Hamilton or Jefferson, the debate there is endless . . .) ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2014, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-delay-god-wrote-the-constitution/689027/19 "2014-05-22T22:55:50Z")
> [@Skammer](#): > > Weird how many presidents died that year. One? The most common number of presidential deaths in a year is of course zero. But one’s the second most common amount. There have been three years - 1826, 1862, and 1901 - that had two presidents die. No year has had more than two. ---
**Author:** ![Rick\_Kitchen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rick_kitchen/32/522_2.png) [@Rick\_Kitchen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick_Kitchen)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2014, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-delay-god-wrote-the-constitution/689027/20 "2014-05-22T23:02:57Z")
But the article says that Madison was the fourth President to die that year. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-delay-god-wrote-the-constitution/689027.md?page=2)