# Tom Lehrer appreciation thread **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [April 6, 2007, 7:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-lehrer-appreciation-thread/398960 "2007-04-06T07:39:38Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![wolfman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a8b319/32.png) [@wolfman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfman)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2007, 7:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-lehrer-appreciation-thread/398960/1 "2007-04-06T07:39:38Z")
I was just listenting to my old tom Lehrer records all night while drinking. Damn that man is funny. But what do do you consider his best line ever? Mine is: “What with President Johnson practising ''escalatio(sp?)\* on the the Vietnamese, America has begun to feel like a Christian Scientist with appendicitis.” 40 years later, and he still cracks me up. [sub]\* I have no idea if “escalatio” is a real word or if I spelled it right, but that just makes it more funny, cause I know what he means.[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![Booker57](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Booker57](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Booker57)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2007, 9:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-lehrer-appreciation-thread/398960/2 "2007-04-06T09:32:08Z")
“An Evening_wasted_ with Tom Lehrer” an “That was the year that was” are in my CD player at all times. ---
**Author:** ![Abby\_Emma\_Sasha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e68b1a/32.png) [@Abby\_Emma\_Sasha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Abby_Emma_Sasha)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2007, 9:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-lehrer-appreciation-thread/398960/3 "2007-04-06T09:42:14Z")
In appreciation of Mr. Lehrer I hereby Genuflect! Genuflect! Genuflect! ---
**Author:** ![MacSpon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/34f0e0/32.png) [@MacSpon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacSpon)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2007, 10:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-lehrer-appreciation-thread/398960/4 "2007-04-06T10:16:31Z")
> [@](#): > > “I’d like to sing a song which is completely pointless, but is something which I picked up during my career as a scientist. This may prove useful to some of you someday, perhaps, in a somewhat bizarre set of circumstances.” From _The Elements_. Bliss! ---
**Author:** ![Surok](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cc9497/32.png) [@Surok](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Surok)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2007, 10:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-lehrer-appreciation-thread/398960/5 "2007-04-06T10:22:09Z")
‘My pulse will be quickenin’ with each drop of strychenine I feed to a … coworker’ Ah, that’s not quite how it goes. Great song though. And on a related note, there’s a nice [flash animation](http://www.privatehand.com/flash/elements.html) to The Elements. ---
**Author:** ![Dervorin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/eb8c5e/32.png) [@Dervorin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dervorin)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2007, 11:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-lehrer-appreciation-thread/398960/6 "2007-04-06T11:03:02Z")
Ah, Mr. Lehrer. How many times you have made me snort with helpless laughter. > [@](#): > > I particularly remember a heartwarming novel of his about a young necrophiliac who finally achieved his boyhood ambition by becoming coroner. … (scattered laughter) The rest of you can look it up when you get home. I’m also very, very tickled every time I listen to Lobachevsky: > [@](#): > > I am never forget the day I first meet the great _Lobachevsky_. > In one word he told me secret of success in mathematics: Plagiarize! > > Plagiarize, > Let no one else’s work evade your eyes, > Remember why the good Lord made your eyes, > So don’t shade your eyes, > But plagiarize, plagiarize, plagiarize… > Only be sure always to call it please, “research”. The man had a genius for rhyme and timing; I get as much enjoyment out of his timing and delivery as the content of the songs themselves. ---
**Author:** ![scotandrsn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a4c791/32.png) [@scotandrsn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scotandrsn)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2007, 11:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-lehrer-appreciation-thread/398960/7 "2007-04-06T11:21:52Z")
[QUOTE=MacSpon] From _The Elements_. Bliss! [/QUOTE] Back in the 80s, an acquaintance of mine played for me one of her prized possessions: A tape transfer of a wire spool recording of Tom Lehrer and two other professors putting on some sort of performance for a group of students. None of his regular stuff, all different. I don’t recall much about it, except that they did a parody of “Fugue for Tinhorns” from _Guys and Dolls_ that espoused the relative merits of their specialty. I recall it ended, one guy: Chemistry… Lehrer: Math… other guy: Physics… unison: I got the coooooooouurse riiiiiiiiiight heeeeeeeeeere! ---
**Author:** ![PerditaX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/65b543/32.png) [@PerditaX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PerditaX)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2007, 11:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-lehrer-appreciation-thread/398960/8 "2007-04-06T11:44:50Z")
As one of the (mercifully small) group of kids who actually had to learn “New Math” in grade-school, that song is my favorite. Best line: “Don’t worry. Base Eight is just like Base Ten, really…if you’re missing two fingers.” ---
**Author:** ![guizot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guizot/32/3636_2.png) [@guizot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/guizot)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2007, 12:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-lehrer-appreciation-thread/398960/9 "2007-04-06T12:12:20Z")
I’d be very hard pressed to find one line to be a favorite; they were all so good. What I _can_ say is that I learned about the 60s through his humor. I had no idea of whom Sheriff Clark and Lena Horn were until I heard “National Brotherhood Week.” But I learned something: it probably had something to do with a white man and a black woman. “Who’s Next” taught me that Israel had the bomb (and that I learned, as a seven-year-old in the late 80s)–years later I would learn that Israel wouldn’t admit to it. And I learned “The Elements” verbatim just to show off to my middle-school school chemistry teacher: ``` TEACHER: Now it's time to learn about the elements. ME: I know about them. TEACHER: Oh, you do? Then tell me. ME: [Reciting "The Elements," in entirety, by Tom Lehrer] TEACHER: That's very good, **guizot**. Now can you tell me how they react to one another? ME: Well, I thought that was YOUR job. But I CAN say that hydrogen and oxygen make water; and that nitrogen is the majority of the air. ``` I’ll have you know that I memorized “The Elements” on VINYL–yes, my parents had turn-tables and vinyl in the 80s. They were from Boston. And they loved Tom Lehrer (as well as the Kingston Trio). ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2007, 12:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-lehrer-appreciation-thread/398960/10 "2007-04-06T12:19:38Z")
I loved his line from 1965 poking fun at Ronald Reagan being in politics. And the subject of the song, George Murphy, is of course a nobody now. But the Masochism Tango is still one of my favorites. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2007, 12:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-lehrer-appreciation-thread/398960/11 "2007-04-06T12:49:05Z")
For some reason “I Wanna Go Back To Dixie” is going through my head. \* Won’tcha come with me to Alabammy, Back to the arms of my dear ol’ Mammy, Her cookin’s lousy and her hands are clammy, But what the hell, it’s home.\* ---
**Author:** ![Scuba\_Ben](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/278dde/32.png) [@Scuba\_Ben](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scuba_Ben)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2007, 12:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-lehrer-appreciation-thread/398960/12 "2007-04-06T12:53:22Z")
My brother sang “Masochism Tango” in his college a capella group. He had the theatrics for the tango down pretty well. I did Lehrer’s _Electric Company_ songs, “Silent E” and “-ly,” as part of the poetry section for a high school oral communications class. ---
**Author:** ![storyteller0910](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecae2f/32.png) [@storyteller0910](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/storyteller0910)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2007, 1:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-lehrer-appreciation-thread/398960/13 "2007-04-06T13:01:18Z")
For some reason my very favorite lyric of all time is: “Once the rockets are up, who cares where they come down? That’s not my department,” says Wernher von Braun. Kills me. ---
**Author:** ![h.sapiens](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e0b2c6/32.png) [@h.sapiens](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/h.sapiens)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2007, 1:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-lehrer-appreciation-thread/398960/14 "2007-04-06T13:05:37Z")
From “The Folk Song Army” _The tune don’t have to be clever, And it don’t matter if you put a couple extra syllables into a line. It sounds more ethnic if it ain’t good English And it don’t even gotta rhyme… (excuse me: rhyne!)_ And from “That’s Mathematics” _How much gold can you hold in an elephant’s ear? When it’s noon on the moon, then what time is it here? If you could count for a year, would you get to infinity, Or somewhere in that vicinity?_ I’m pretty sure I first heard Tom Lehrer singing “Silent E” on The Electric Company. I’ve been a fan ever since. ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2007, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-lehrer-appreciation-thread/398960/15 "2007-04-06T13:37:51Z")
My parents were big Lehrer fans, and I knew the words to most of his songs long before I really _understood_ them. I vividly remember reading _Oedpius Rex_ in high school and thinking “Ohhh … _now_ I get it!” ---
**Author:** ![Rocketeer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rocketeer/32/4437_2.png) [@Rocketeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rocketeer)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2007, 1:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-lehrer-appreciation-thread/398960/16 "2007-04-06T13:54:22Z")
“…which is why I perspire / when we tango!” ---
**Author:** ![usar\_jag](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/f0a364/32.png) [@usar\_jag](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/usar_jag)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2007, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-lehrer-appreciation-thread/398960/17 "2007-04-06T14:13:49Z")
A couple verses from “It Makes a Fellow Proud to be a Soldier”: Now Ed flunked out of second grade, and never finished school. He doesn’t know a shelter half from an entrenching tool. But he’s going to be a big success. He heads his class at OCS. It makes a fella proud to be a soldier! Our old mess sergeant’s taste buds had been shot off in the war. But his savory collations add to our esprit de corps. To think of all the marvelous ways They’re using plastics nowadays. It makes a fella proud to be a soldier! Our lieutenant is the up-and-coming type. Played with soldiers as a boy you just can bet. It is written in the stars He will get his captain’s bars, But he hasn’t got enough box tops yet. Our captain has a handicap to cope with, sad to tell. He’s from Georgia, and he doesn’t speak the language very well. He used to be, so rumor has, The Dean of Men at Alcatraz. It makes a fella proud to be a soldier! ---
**Author:** ![fishbicycle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/aeb1de/32.png) [@fishbicycle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fishbicycle)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2007, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-lehrer-appreciation-thread/398960/18 "2007-04-06T14:13:50Z")
I’ve loved Tom Lehrer since I first heard “The Masochism Tango” on Dr. Demento, back in the '70s. I have not one, but _three_ original pressings of his first, self-financed and distributed 10" album. One of them is from England, where he got on the Decca label, which was the big time over there. Back home, he couldn’t get a record label to touch him! He had to start his own. ---
**Author:** ![Sal\_Ammoniac](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8dc957/32.png) [@Sal\_Ammoniac](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sal_Ammoniac)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2007, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-lehrer-appreciation-thread/398960/19 "2007-04-06T15:11:50Z")
I haven’t heard Tom Lehrer for probably 30 years, but his stuff sticks in your head amazingly. Just the other day I found myself remembering: Watch Brinkley and Huntley describing contrapuntally The cities we have lost. No need for you to miss a minute of the agonizing holocaust! Looking back, I can’t account for how this album might have fallen into my hands as a ten-year-old. I can only guess that my parents had it. When you think of it, Tom Lehrer has to be one of the most unusual successes the recording industry has ever produced. ---
**Author:** ![Sal\_Ammoniac](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8dc957/32.png) [@Sal\_Ammoniac](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sal_Ammoniac)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2007, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-lehrer-appreciation-thread/398960/20 "2007-04-06T15:15:21Z")
Lehrer has a great line, by the way, quoted in the Wikipedia article: “I’m not tempted to write a song about George W. Bush. I couldn’t figure out what sort of song I would write. That’s the problem: I don’t want to satirise George Bush and his puppeteers, I want to vaporise them.” [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-lehrer-appreciation-thread/398960.md?page=2)