# Tom Swifties! **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [July 10, 2013, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095 "2013-07-10T01:10:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 160
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2018, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/3183 "2018-02-19T19:30:56Z")
“All of them? Are you sure?” Tom’s wife pressed, steaming. ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2018, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/3184 "2018-02-19T22:03:34Z")
"Yes, I admit it – I bilked Mr. Parker out of all the money he earned playing Daniel Boone,’ Tom did confess. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2018, 2:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/3185 "2018-02-20T02:48:35Z")
“If only there were some beautiful, mythical Greek demigoddess here to inspire me,” Tom mused. ---
**Author:** ![Oly](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/oly/32/8255_2.png) [@Oly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oly)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2018, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/3186 "2018-02-20T04:43:27Z")
“I think I broke my humerus”, Tom cracked. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2018, 2:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/3187 "2018-02-20T14:17:59Z")
“I really enjoying the young kid on 3rd Rock From The Sun,” said Tommy, solomonly. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2018, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/3188 "2018-02-20T16:33:22Z")
“They say William Rehnquist, Chief Justice of the United States, got a little loopy from his meds while he was hospitalized once,” Tom said judgmentally. ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2018, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/3189 "2018-02-20T16:42:20Z")
“That decision Justice Taney’s court just made in the _Scott v. Sandford_ case will come back to haunt this country,” Tom said with a sense of Dred. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2018, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/3190 "2018-02-20T17:09:46Z")
“President Coolidge appointed one guy to the Supreme Court but FDR named him Chief Justice, even though he was a Republican,” Tom said stonily. ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2018, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/3191 "2018-02-20T17:11:30Z")
“Kitty voices are so beautiful”, Tom mused. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2018, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/3192 "2018-02-20T19:57:17Z")
“I wonder what it’s like at the center of a supermassive black hole?” Tom mused. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2018, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/3193 "2018-02-20T22:45:21Z")
“I can see myself quite clearly on the surface of that sunlit lake,” Tom reflected. ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2018, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/3194 "2018-02-21T17:55:32Z")
“I only remove the foreskin”, said the mohel, snippily. ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2018, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/3195 "2018-02-21T20:49:52Z")
“That wooden stick driven into my heart really hurts!” said Dracula, painstakingly. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2018, 3:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/3196 "2018-02-22T03:22:11Z")
“I always loved _The Mummy_ movies,” said Tom, enraptured. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2018, 1:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/3197 "2018-03-13T13:15:57Z")
“I,m going to see the longest running show on Broadway, and I am a huge Phan,” Tom said, operatically (Get It? Phan Tom), And yes, Phantom of the Opera lovers do write the word “Phsn.” ---
**Author:** ![Leo\_Bloom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leo_bloom/32/10377_2.png) [@Leo\_Bloom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leo_Bloom)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2018, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/3198 "2018-03-19T01:28:35Z")
nm ---
**Author:** ![Leo\_Bloom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leo_bloom/32/10377_2.png) [@Leo\_Bloom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leo_Bloom)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2018, 1:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/3199 "2018-03-19T01:30:10Z")
“Rub me and make a wish,” said Tom, genially. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2018, 3:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/3200 "2018-03-19T03:44:40Z")
> [@Annie-Xmas](#): > > …And yes, Phantom of the Opera lovers do write the word “Phsn.” I don’t get it. “I can’t believe my mom spent so much on new carpeting!” said Tom, floored. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2018, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/3201 "2018-03-19T13:37:46Z")
I meant “Phan.” Which they do use. Damn left hand. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2018, 1:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/3202 "2018-03-19T13:52:33Z")
Ah, got it. Thanks. “Can you believe how disrespectful the American colonists were to the Royal Navy?” Tom gaspe[e]d. > **[Gaspee Affair](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gaspee_Affair)** > > The Gaspee Affair was a significant event in the lead-up to the American Revolution. HMS Gaspee was a British customs schooner that enforced the Navigation Acts in and around Newport, Rhode Island in 1772. It ran aground in shallow water while chasing the packet ship Hannah on June 9 near Gaspee Point in Warwick, Rhode Island. A group of men led by Abraham Whipple and John Brown I attacked, boarded, and torched the Gaspee. > The event increased tensions between the American colonists and Britis... [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095.md?page=159) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095.md?page=161)