# Tom Swifties! **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [July 10, 2013, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095 "2013-07-10T01:10:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 17
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2013, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/321 "2013-07-17T16:23:28Z")
“I guess I should turn down the volume,” Tom allowed. ---
**Author:** ![RobDog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f07891/32.png) [@RobDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RobDog)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2013, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/322 "2013-07-17T16:38:57Z")
“I am a bright and shining star,” said Tom, seriously. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2013, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/323 "2013-07-17T16:44:11Z")
“[Stingray](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stingray_(TV_series)) to the rescue!” Tom said waspishly. ---
**Author:** ![Colophon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f05b48/32.png) [@Colophon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colophon)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2013, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/324 "2013-07-17T16:47:12Z")
“I made this macaroni cheese from scratch,” Tom said craftily. ---
**Author:** ![TonyRV2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/858c86/32.png) [@TonyRV2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TonyRV2)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2013, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/325 "2013-07-17T17:02:51Z")
“Why does he have to be such a son of a pup?” Tom said sobbingly. ---
**Author:** ![TonyRV2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/858c86/32.png) [@TonyRV2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TonyRV2)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2013, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/326 "2013-07-17T17:12:24Z")
“If I dig a big hole, will it fill with water?”, Tom pondered. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2013, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/327 "2013-07-17T18:26:21Z")
“Any other Mary Pickford fans here?” Tom asked coquettishly. ---
**Author:** ![MacLir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9e8a1a/32.png) [@MacLir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacLir)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2013, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/328 "2013-07-17T19:29:28Z")
“They planted more conifers,” Tom inferred ---
**Author:** ![MacLir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9e8a1a/32.png) [@MacLir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacLir)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2013, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/329 "2013-07-17T19:32:54Z")
“They harrowed the field I was sunbathing in!” said Tom, in a cultivated manner ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2013, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/330 "2013-07-17T19:34:29Z")
“Those explosions should have been purple, and I need more puce in the blood,” said Tom violetly. ---
**Author:** ![MacLir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9e8a1a/32.png) [@MacLir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacLir)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2013, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/331 "2013-07-17T19:44:01Z")
“We just love singing together!” Tom and his friends chorused ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2013, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/332 "2013-07-17T19:52:46Z")
“God sees everything we duet,” Tom quoted Schickele. ---
**Author:** ![MacLir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9e8a1a/32.png) [@MacLir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacLir)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2013, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/333 "2013-07-17T20:04:47Z")
“Did you catch the act with the quartet of bruins playing instruments?” Tom said forebearingly. ---
**Author:** ![fanganga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/58f4c7/32.png) [@fanganga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fanganga)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2013, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/334 "2013-07-17T20:04:46Z")
“I find the Parthenon lacking a certain something,” said Tom archly. ---
**Author:** ![fanganga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/58f4c7/32.png) [@fanganga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fanganga)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2013, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/335 "2013-07-17T20:07:46Z")
“It would be instructive to compare this list of attendees to the one we shall surely encounter should we continue to ascend,” said Tom, assuming a higher register. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2013, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/336 "2013-07-17T20:09:33Z")
“You have the manners of a pig,” Tom said boorishly. ---
**Author:** ![fanganga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/58f4c7/32.png) [@fanganga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fanganga)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2013, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/337 "2013-07-17T20:11:59Z")
“I really am trapped under a pile of metamorphic rocksch!” Sean inschisted. ---
**Author:** ![MacLir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9e8a1a/32.png) [@MacLir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacLir)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2013, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/338 "2013-07-17T20:13:26Z")
“I love to hear the birds warble!” Tom said tremulously ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2013, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/339 "2013-07-17T20:13:48Z")
(No more Mister Gneiss Guy, then.) 😃 “But a guitar’s not the same as a violin!” Tom fretted. ---
**Author:** ![MacLir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9e8a1a/32.png) [@MacLir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacLir)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2013, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/340 "2013-07-17T20:15:08Z")
> [@fanganga](#): > > “I really am trapped under a pile of metamorphic rocksch!” Sean inschisted. “Wrong identification! Learn some geology!” Tom shouted volcanically [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095.md?page=16) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095.md?page=18)