# Tom Swifties! **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [July 10, 2013, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095 "2013-07-10T01:10:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 34
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2013, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/661 "2013-08-05T15:29:05Z")
“Old Fido spends all his days just sleeping on that old piece of rug” said Tom, dogmatically. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2013, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/662 "2013-08-05T18:03:46Z")
“I just do whatever Ol’ Bossy tells me to do,” Tom said, cowed. ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2013, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/663 "2013-08-05T18:15:34Z")
“No, Dr. McCoy, a Vulcan’s cardiac organ is located in the lower abdomen” said Spock, downhearted. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2013, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/664 "2013-08-05T18:21:16Z")
“Hey, Dale, take a gander at this!” flashed Gordon. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2013, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/665 "2013-08-05T19:02:12Z")
“My mom threw out all of my PlayStation gear,” Tom said disconsolately. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2013, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/666 "2013-08-05T20:29:13Z")
“I can’t seem to find menthol-tipped cigarettes any more,” Tom said disconsolately. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2013, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/667 "2013-08-05T20:33:59Z")
“And I’ll never have any ever again”, said Tom, inconsolably. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2013, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/668 "2013-08-05T20:52:17Z")
“The next passage consists entirely of crotchets and minims,” Tom noted. ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2013, 11:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/669 "2013-08-05T23:42:54Z")
“I needed reconstructive surgery after getting my ass shot off in Iraq”, Tom rebutted. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2013, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/670 "2013-08-06T01:50:26Z")
“Cancel all my cancellations,” Tom rejoined. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2013, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/671 "2013-08-06T03:43:58Z")
“Have you ever seen a troupe of acrobats as talented as that?” Tom asked flippantly. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2013, 3:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/672 "2013-08-06T03:57:48Z")
“Why would I care if you’re going to the North Pole?” Tom asked frigidly. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2013, 10:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/673 "2013-08-06T10:25:03Z")
“I’m not sending that string of dots and dashes again!” Tom said remorselessly. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2013, 12:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/674 "2013-08-06T12:07:02Z")
“Post 668, Post 669, Post 670, Post 671, Post 672, Post 673, Post 674,” Tom composted. ---
**Author:** ![fanganga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/58f4c7/32.png) [@fanganga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fanganga)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2013, 12:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/675 "2013-08-06T12:25:38Z")
“C Chart on TV, stop,” said Tom telegraphically. ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2013, 2:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/676 "2013-08-06T14:14:13Z")
“I know my new baseball glove is better, but I just can’t quite give up my old one”, said Tom, intermittently. ---
**Author:** ![Askance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askance/32/8281_2.png) [@Askance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askance)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2013, 6:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/677 "2013-08-07T06:40:34Z")
“I’m flat out!” said Tom plainly. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2013, 7:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/678 "2013-08-07T07:17:22Z")
“As though I would ever abuse solvents!” Tom huffed. ---
**Author:** ![fanganga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/58f4c7/32.png) [@fanganga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fanganga)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2013, 8:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/679 "2013-08-07T08:45:25Z")
“Consider a shoe with much leather on the bottom,” said Tom soulfully. ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2013, 10:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/680 "2013-08-07T10:36:22Z")
“And don’t forget the leather on the top” said Tom, keeping instep. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095.md?page=33) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095.md?page=35)