# Tom Swifties! **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [July 10, 2013, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095 "2013-07-10T01:10:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 84
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2014, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/1661 "2014-03-09T22:56:29Z")
“Gimme some of that feeling of annoyance or displeasure,” said Tom, taking umbrage. mmm ---
**Author:** ![Askance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askance/32/8281_2.png) [@Askance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askance)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2014, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/1662 "2014-03-09T23:16:43Z")
“Come on, Mother, everyone knows a good bleeding will cure what ails you!” Tom mumbled. ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2014, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/1663 "2014-03-10T01:00:39Z")
“I’ve decided I want to live after all, but I don’t think I got that snake off me in time to stop the venom”, said Cleopatra, exasperated. ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2014, 2:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/1664 "2014-03-10T02:11:08Z")
“Think I’ll allow my gold mine to revert back to the state,” Tom exclaimed. ---
**Author:** ![Rick\_Kitchen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rick_kitchen/32/522_2.png) [@Rick\_Kitchen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick_Kitchen)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2014, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/1665 "2014-03-10T02:42:13Z")
“I can’t wait to see that new Jennifer Lawrence movie,” Tom said, mockingly. ---
**Author:** ![Esox\_Lucius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/848f3c/32.png) [@Esox\_Lucius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esox_Lucius)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2014, 2:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/1666 "2014-03-10T02:44:35Z")
“Over the centuries, this land has alternated between bog and prairie,” Tom explained. “Over the centuries, this land has alternated between bog and prairie,” he repeated. ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2014, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/1667 "2014-03-10T03:05:40Z")
“Think I’ll put on some clothes today, for once,” said Tom, nakedly. ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2014, 12:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/1668 "2014-03-10T12:57:44Z")
“I think Sandra Bullock should have won the Best Actress Oscar”, said Tom, aware of the gravity of the situation. ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2014, 12:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/1669 "2014-03-10T12:59:53Z")
“Me love cookie. But me also love eat letter after R so much me not eat cookie” said Cookie Monster, eschewing a favorite food. ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2014, 1:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/1670 "2014-03-10T13:31:32Z")
“There is no high ground in Kansas at all”, Tom stated flatly. ---
**Author:** ![Find\_Friends](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c37758/32.png) [@Find\_Friends](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Find_Friends)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2014, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/1671 "2014-03-10T15:05:25Z")
“I should think it pretty obvious that something is lacking in your design for my new diner!” Tom countered. ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2014, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/1672 "2014-03-10T20:00:16Z")
“That’s the last straw, my child – get out of my house and never come back!” Tom said, with abandon. ---
**Author:** ![Askance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askance/32/8281_2.png) [@Askance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askance)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2014, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/1673 "2014-03-11T03:23:40Z")
> [@buddha\_david](#): > > “That’s the last straw, my child – get out of my house and never come back!” Tom said, with abandon. “Steady, young Miss! Can’t you see I’m married?” Tom said, with abandon. ---
**Author:** ![Dead\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9fc29f/32.png) [@Dead\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dead_Cat)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2014, 10:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/1674 "2014-03-11T10:30:36Z")
“There’s no way I can eat all that food after my weight-loss surgery,” Tom said, with abandon. ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2014, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/1675 "2014-03-11T13:37:43Z")
“Here’s a photo of me with 3 of the 4 members of that Swedish group that was popular in the 70’s, and the older Everly brother”, said Tom, with ABA’n’Don. ---
**Author:** ![Dead\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9fc29f/32.png) [@Dead\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dead_Cat)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2014, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/1676 "2014-03-11T15:10:08Z")
“Can you call me back later? I’m at a gig for three of the four members of that Swedish group that was popular in the 70’s, and the older Everly brother, and I can’t hear a thing while they’re playing,” Tom said, with abandon. ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2014, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/1677 "2014-03-11T16:16:36Z")
“We’re announcing a reunion of the classic lineup of Venom!” said Cronos and Mantas, with Abaddon. ---
**Author:** ![Esox\_Lucius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/848f3c/32.png) [@Esox\_Lucius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esox_Lucius)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2014, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/1678 "2014-03-11T16:34:50Z")
“I’ve looked everywhere and still can’t find my headband,” said Tom, with abandon. ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2014, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/1679 "2014-03-11T17:29:55Z")
“I’m wearing a T-shirt with the second and fourth letters of the alphabet!” said Elmo, with a B an’ D on. ---
**Author:** ![Dead\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9fc29f/32.png) [@Dead\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dead_Cat)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2014, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095/1680 "2014-03-11T17:40:40Z")
“This notice is to prevent any mafia bosses from entering the premises,” said Tom with abandon. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095.md?page=83) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/tom-swifties/663095.md?page=85)